Someone To You - teamdemonmonkey - Twilight Series (2024)

Chapter 1: Tainted Love

Chapter Text

I'm baaaaaack! Here's my try at my beloved Bellisle ship!

The song for this story is Someone to You by BANNERS.

The song for this chapter is Tainted Love by Harrison.

Connect with me!

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter One: Tainted Love

BPOV

Forks was, quite possibly, the smallest town on the planet and I'd never believed it more than at

that moment.

Everyone was staring at me.

I mean, yeah, I was the beloved police chief's estranged daughter come home but really? This level of attention was unnerving and uncomfortable.

I hiked my backpack higher up on my shoulder and hurried to the cafeteria, mostly ignoring the endless chatter from the new friend I had apparently picked up. Jessica seemed nice enough but I could tell it was less about me and more about being around the newest thing at Forks High. We moved through the lunch line and I followed her to a table full of people I had seen staring at me throughout the day. I deflected the overeager questions directed at me and looked around desperately for an escape. The attention was stifling and I finally stood up abruptly and made some excuse about needing to get some things from my locker. I made my way hurriedly across the cafeteria and was almost through the doors and free when I ran directly into a wall.

Not a wall; it was a person.

A boy.

A boy who was barely being held back by two other boys as he growled and strained for me. His face was beautiful but terrifying as he strained for me, baring his teeth and growling like an animal. I could see his muscles straining, his body taught while the two restraining him pulled fiercely against him. Terror gripped my heart. If I went off his behavior alone, I would think he wanted to kill me.

I felt arms around my waist, leading me at nearly inhuman speed away as the growling grew louder behind us. I turned back and my eyes locked with the furious black eyes of the boy I'd bumped into as he was pulled out the doors towards the parking lot. I turned back around and began to register who was pulling me in the opposite direction. I looked up at the most gorgeous woman I'd ever seen in my life. She had shiny, long blonde hair that curled effortlessly past her shoulders. Her face was literal perfection and she was talking so quickly with a girl on my other side I wasn't sure how she even understood what she was saying. I looked at her companion. She was shorter than the perfect girl, about my height or smaller. She had raven hair styled perfectly in a trendy pixie cut and her face was also what could only be described as pixieish. She was also insanely beautiful but not in a supermodel way.

"What-" I began to ask but the pixie stopped me.

"I'm so sorry. We are being terribly rude. I'm Alice Cullen. This is my sister Rosalie Hale." I twisted away from their arms at my back and waist. It didn't escape my notice that they didn't back away but stayed closer than was strictly polite for being complete strangers. Alice seemed to be lost to her thoughts but Rosalie was staring at me with pity. The two looked nothing alike except for the almost deathly pale skin and amber eyes they shared. What an odd coloring.

"Do you want to explain what the hell is going on," I demanded. Rosalie's face soured and for a moment, I was tempted to run and hide from her.

"I'm sorry about our brother back there," Alice said. "Edward is having a really off day today. He shouldn't even have been at school today. I'm sorry he lost his temper. Are you okay?" I stared at her blankly. Her brother had to be dragged out of the school by two other guys aftergrowlingat me and giving me what was easily the world's fiercest death glare and all she could say was he was havingan off day?!

"I'm fine. But maybe your brother should see someone about his obvious rage issues. Honestly, it's not okay for him to lose his temper like that just because I accidentally bumped into him."

"Maybe you should have been watching where you're going," Rosalie chimed in coldly.

Oh hell to the no.

"If your brother has that kind of reaction to such a simple mistake, I worry that he should even be allowed in public places. Maybe someone should mention it to the principal. I'd hate to think what could happen if there wasn't someone else there to drag him away." Her eyes narrowed at me but I remained unflustered. A smirk finally broke our staring contest.

"I like you," she said. "Most people are intimidated by us. But you aren't. And something tells me you don't put up with bullsh*t, either." I remained impassive.

"Not usually, no."

"Look, I'm really sorry about Edward. I promise we will take care of it," Alice interjected and I turned my gaze to her. Her shoulders were high and tight with tension.

"Does this happen a lot," I asked suspiciously. If there was a guy lashing out at the kids here, I would have to mention it to Charlie when he got home.

"Never. Edward is annoyingly boring," Rosalie drawled. "This was just a crazy, random event. We'll make sure he doesn't do anything like this again."

"Okay." We stared at each other, the silence growing as I waited for them to say something or leave but they just stood there. "I'm Bella Swan," I finally said.

"We know," Alice chirped, awfully chipper for someone whose brother just tried to kill me with a look. "It's so nice to meet you. What class do you have next?" The sound of students moving in the halls finally seemed to penetrate my brain.

"Biology," I said, looking around and realizing that they had dragged me to the library where it was relatively empty and quiet.

"Why don't I walk you," she offered with a cheerful grin.

"Um, okay, I guess." She fell in step beside me, linking her arm through mine. She began to chat idly with me about Forks. I wasn't sure what to make of it.

"Here it is," she finally said with unnecessary enthusiasm. "Here, put your number in my phone. I'll text you so you have mine. We can hang out or do homework later or something." I typed my number into her phone before handing it back to her. "Okay, well, we have to get to class. See you later, Bella!" I watched as they walked away, feeling confused and just a little hustled.

What had just happened?

"You must be Miss Swan," the biology teacher said, snapping me out of my thoughts. "I'm afraid I only have one chair left in the room. You can sit at that table, there. Your lab partner will be Edward Cullen."

I stumbled to my seat and sat down, glancing warily at the seat next to me. It was empty and it remained that way the whole class and then for the days following until one day I showed up and there was Edward Cullen, sitting casually like the last time we had seen each other he hadn't been having an absolute meltdown.

Chapter 2: Human

Chapter Text

So much to unfold here.

The song for this chapter is Human by Christina Perri.

Connect with me!

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Two: Human

CPOV

"Carlisle," Alice said urgently as soon as I pulled up to the house. I noticed that the house was oddly quiet. Something must have happened. I hurried from the car and Alice met me on the porch.

"What's wrong," I asked her, already working out logistics if there was a need for our sudden departure.

"The new girl, Bella Swan," she said and I nodded. Charlie Swan's daughter had come to live with him and was quite the talk of the town. "Edward ran into her today and she's… she's his singer, Carlisle."

"Did he-" I began to ask but she cut me off.

"He didn't hurt her. Jasper and Emmett dragged him out of the school and into the woods. He took off for Alaska from there, said to tell you he'll call."

"And Bella?"

"Rosalie and I took her as far away from him as possible. She's unharmed." I sighed in relief.

"Thank god Edward was able to control himself once they were separated," I murmured.

"Rose is helping Esme pack so she can join him." I then noticed the sounds of Rosalie in the garage, loading luggage into a car. Esme was upstairs grabbing their things.

"Will they come back?"

"That decision hasn't been made yet," she complained and I smiled at her pout. A multitude of futures in her head and it still wasn't enough.

"Please keep me updated on Edward. And if Bella poses a threat to our staying."

"I don't think that will be a problem. I don't see Bella being an issue. Actually, I think we're going to be great friends. Even Rose likes her." Rose rarely liked humans. Truth be told, she seemed to only tolerateusmost days. "I'm going to see if she wants to hang out or something." My children made it a point not to get involved with humans as a general rule. Most humans steered clear of us.

"Do you think she would be comfortable with that," I asked curiously.

"Yes. It's like she wasn't affected at all the way other humans are. She even tried to stare down Rosalie. She's got… something. I want to learn what that is." Endless possibilities flew across my mind as to why this might be. "Anyway, Emmett and Jasper are waiting in the woods by her house just in case Edward didn't actually go to Alaska. I'm certain he has but we wanted to make sure, just in case."

"That's probably wise. We know that the others were not so lucky with their control," I lamented. I directed Alice into the house and set down my briefcase. I pulled my coat off and placed it in the closet while Alice caught me up on the day's events at school. Bella was the center of attention but no one else had noticed the near accident between her and Edward. I wandered up the stairs to Esme and Edward's room, stopping just inside the door.

"I'm so sorry, Esme," I told her and she turned and wrapped her arms around me.

"It could have been so much worse. I'm just happy that nothing happened."

"How long do you think you two will be in Alaska," I asked her as she released me.

"I'm not sure. It might be better if we… I'm just not sure if he has the control to come back and not kill her," she fretted.

"Take all the time you need," I assured her.

"It will be okay," Alice chimed in from behind me. "Everything is going to work out perfectly." Esme embraced the two of us before heading to the garage, doing the same to Rosalie and then sped away. I stared at their empty room, an overwhelming sense of melancholy leaving me hollow. Edward had been my longest companion and Esme almost as long. I'd been overjoyed when they had fallen in love even if I had often felt like an intruder on their intimacy. If Edward didn't have the self control to come back would they just live separately from us? Would we move to be near them?

"Don't worry so much, Carlisle," Alice reassured as she slipped her hand into mine, leaning her head against my arm. "We'll all be together again before you know it." I smiled slightly and squeezed her hand.

"I always worry about my children. It's what fathers do," I teased and she giggled. She extricated herself from my embrace and floated down the stairs as Rosalie came in. I wandered after her with a final glance at the empty bedroom.

"Tanya just texted that Edward is with them. I'm going to call Emmett and tell them to come home," she announced before wandering off with the phone pressed to her ear. I laid down across the couch with Alice at my feet and we waited patiently for the boys to make an appearance. A few minutes later, they came stomping in, soaked with the rain and laughing. Alice jumped up and ran at Jasper, wrapping herself around him and kissing him enthusiastically. Rosalie followed after them silently.

"Anything to report," I asked idly while they shook the rain from their hair.

"No, sir," Jasper answered. "She didn't say a word about what happened,even after Jessica Stanley called to give her the dirt on us and ask if she and Alice had met before. Mike Newton apparently told her that Alice and Bella were 'chummy' before Biology."

"She seems sad," Emmett added.

"How so?"

"I don't know what brought her here to live with her father but she was watching old home videos and crying after school. I think it's safe to assume something happened to her mother." I frowned, my dead heart hurting for this girl.

"Jasper, what did you get from her?"

"She's definitely depressed. Resigned, grieving, guilty. A lot of emotions but she's definitely not happy."

"Well, that will all change after she and I become besties," Alice promised and I laughed. I waved them off and they left, separating to go to their bedrooms and engaging in intimate activities that I mostly tried to block out. I didn't usually feel my loneliness quite so sharply but without Edward and Esme around, I suddenly felt like a burdensome third wheel. I decided to go for a run and give my children some privacy. I put on a rain jacket and left the house, taking off through the trees at a pace only slightly faster than human. I relished the fresh smell of the earth mingling with the rain as the wind hit my face.

I found myself in the woods behind the Swan house. I heard two heartbeats and walked around the forest line of the house to see Charlie's cruiser in the front yard. The sound of tinkling dishes echoed in the otherwise silent room and quiet breathing.

"How was school today, Bells," Charlie finally asked.

"It was fine. The school here is smaller than in Phoenix. I'm not used to people knowing so much about me before I've even met them."

"Not much happens around here. You're kind of a big deal," Charlie admitted sheepishly. "I'm sure things will die down after a week or two."

"Yeah," Bella muttered. Silence filled the space again.

"Did you make any friends?"

"Yeah, I guess. Jessica Stanley showed me around. And Alice Cullen gave me her phone number." I stilled at the mention of Alice's name, waiting to see if maybe she was going to mention Edward's strange behavior to her father.

"Dr. Cullen's daughter?"

"Yeah, both of them actually. Alice is kind of weird."

"Don't let their oddities push you away. We are incredibly lucky that Carlisle's sister wanted to live in a small town instead of a city. He could be making four times what he makes here. But people still gossip and judge. His kids have never set a toe out of line and he's patched me up more than once."

"I like them," Bella assured him and he grunted in response and then the deafening silence returned, only broken by the occasional sound of silverware moving over plates.

"Look, Bells, I… um… well, I know that things have been hard since your mom… well, since you moved here. But I want you to know I'm here for you. I know I'm not Renee but… I love you. I will do anything to help you feel at home here." I heard Bella's breathing hitch with the mention of her mother's name and I could hear the thickness in her voice when she answered.

"I know, Dad. I love you too." They embraced and then I heard lighter footsteps moving across the kitchen floor and the sound of dishes being set in the sink. "I, um, I think I left my books in my truck. I'm going to go see if they're in there," Bella said with forced lightness as Charlie moved into the den and turned a sports game on. I made sure I was invisible amongst the trees as the front door opened. Bella stepped out and if my heart had been beating, it would have stopped.

She was beautiful.

Her heart shaped face was framed by thick, long waves of chocolatey auburn hair. Her delicate skin was so pale, she almost could have passed for one of our kind. She was biting her full bottom lip and her warm brown eyes were filling with tears. She held her arms around her slender frame, like she was holding herself together. She pulled the truck door open and climbed in, closing the door behind her. As soon as the door closed, sobs overtook her and she shook with the force of her tears. I longed to join her, to pull her into my arms and calm her shaky breaths and the torrent of tears running down her face.

Why was I so struck by her? I'd been alone for over three hundred years. What was it about this young woman that had me forcing myself to stay absolutely still? I didn't know and I was disconcerted that my instincts to protect her were testing my control so thoroughly.

There was something about Bella Swan. And it was more than being Edward's singer.

Chapter 3: Circus

Chapter Text

Buckle your seat belts because things are about to get bumpy.

The song for this chapter is Circus by Brittney Spears. (#freebrittney)

Connect with me!

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Three: Circus

BPOV

Alice all but jumped me as soon as I pulled up to the school the next day. My eyes were puffy from crying and there was a pounding in my head that promised to be a migraine by the end of the day. I opened my truck door and climbed out.

"Hi, Bella! How are you?" I regarded her warily. She was too energetic for this town and this early in the morning.

"Dandy," I muttered and I saw her smile flicker into a look of pity before fixing itself firmly on her face again.

"I was wondering if you wanted to come over to my house after school today. We could do homework and get to know each other." I paused, a rejection poised on my tongue when I remembered what Charlie had said the night before. I knew why I was so hesitant to get close to Alice and it wasn't just her brother's insane reaction to my clumsiness.

She reminded me of my mom.

Bright, airy, infectious grin, enthusiastic to the core.

Mom was exactly like this. All sunshine and rainbows. Even after cancer had robbed her of her hair and left her gaunt and weak, she'd smiled like the world was in the palm of her hand, ready for the taking. Alice radiated the same energy and I wasn't sure I could be around her without feeling the piercing ache of my mother's death all the more fiercely.

But I longed for a friend. Someone to talk to the way Mom and I talked.

"Will your brother be there," I asked her, my tone and posture nonchalant while my heart thundered furiously.

"No. My aunt took him to Alaska to stay with family and work out his issues. It's just me, my other siblings and my dad if you stay long enough. So do you want to come?"

"Sure," I said with a shrug and she wrapped me in a tight hug.

"We are going to have so much fun! I'll come find you at lunch!" She skipped off, meeting who I assumed was Jasper by the school doors and pressing a kiss to his cheek. He smiled at her, eyes soft and I felt a pang in my chest. It was weird that they were together, romantically, and also siblings, yet I hadn't ever been in love. I'd had crushes but I'd never had a man look at me like that. Like a Disney prince who finally found his princess. I shook my head slightly and made my way to class.

I made it through my first two classes with little disruption. But as soon as I sat down in Trig, Jessica was leaning over to me.

"Oh my god, Bella, I can't believe Alice Cullen hugged you! They never talk to anyone and then you come along and suddenly, they're friendly as can be." I didn't miss the jealousy behind her eyes.

"I think it's just because her brother doesn't like me," I muttered and then cringed.

"Really? Which one?"

"Um, I'm not sure. I've only met her and Rosalie."

"Is it Edward? Is that why he's not in school? Did something happen?" It was like she was a shark that smelled the blood of juicy town gossip.

"Oh, is that his name? Alice just mentioned he and her aunt had to go visit family. Some kind of emergency. But no, nothing happened. I accidentally scratched his car before he left and I don't think that endeared me to him." She fell back, disappointed in the lack of a better story.

"Don't take it personally," she reassured me. "Edward doesn't like any of the girls in town. Apparently, no one is good enough for him." I could hear the bitterness as she said that and I wondered how often she had flirted with him only to be rejected. As far as I was concerned, Edward was the equivalent of a serial killer. He had the likability of Jeffrey Dahmer. "Personally, I think that they're all a little full of themselves," she whispered, leaning closer to talk to me as the bell rang and Mr. Varner called our class to order and took roll. "Like, why do you have to date someone you live with? Are other people just not good enough or is it some weird family thing? I bet that Doctor Cullen has a total Targaryen relationship with his sister." I scowled at her.

"You know, Jessica, it's one thing to be jealous that Edward won't give you the time of day but it's a completely different thing to start saying things like that about a family you know nothing about." She gaped at me, mouth hanging open like a fish.

"Excuse me? What the hell do you even know," she shouted, jumping up to stand over me. The class froze, Mr. Varner included. "You've been here all of five seconds and think you know the people here? You've spent the least amount of time possible here since your mom ditched your dad! You don't know anything!" She was standing so close I could feel her shirt rubbing against my shoulder while she yelled. I sucked in a deep breath and then let out a humourless laugh before standing up and forcing her back. I stared her dead in the eyes and moved so that our faces were only inches apart.

"You're right, Jessica. I haven't been here long. But it took me all of five seconds to realize that the reason why Edward Cullen and every other boy in this school doesn't want to date you has less to do with them and everything to do with the fact that you are a shallow, gossipy bitch." Her eyes narrowed.

"At least my mom didn't ship me off to my dad because she didn't want me anymore like you," she whispered.

I don't remember hitting her. There was no clear decision where I weighed pros and cons. But as soon as she finished speaking I had my fist co*cked back then I was slamming it into her face as hard as I could.

Several people screamed and I vaguely registered Mr. Varner coming between us and then grabbing her arm and mine and forcing us out of the room and down the hallway where other curious heads were popping out of the neighboring classrooms. I caught sight of Rosalie and Emmett standing at the back of a crowd that was piling out of a classroom to see the drama unfold. Rosalie looked impressed but Emmett was grinning then whooped as I passed. I ducked my head, hiding a smile, and continued with Mr. Varner out of our building and towards the front office. He held the door open, motioning for Jessica first and then jerking his head for me to follow. I stepped into the small room and flopped down on one of the plastic chairs.

"Oh my-" Mrs. Cope started but he cut her off.

"Miss Stanley needs to see the nurse. Miss Swan hit her." She gasped dramatically, her eyes immediately flying between me and Jessica who was playing up her injury by moaning and moving gingerly like I had shot her in the leg instead of hitting her square in the eye. I rolled my eyes at the theatrics while Mr. Varner helped her into a small room off of the front desk. Mrs. Cope got on her phone and started speaking in low tones, glancing furtively at me every so often before hanging up.

"Principal Greene will see you in his office now, young lady," she ordered sternly and I heaved myself out of my chair while she picked her phone up again and began to dial another number. I walked past her to the door that had been opened and a slightly balding man with a beer belly stepped out, glaring at me.

"Miss Swan," he barked and I waved half-heartedly before entering the room and collapsing on a chair in front of his desk. I heard the door close behind me and he hurried around me to sit at his desk, leveling me with a stern look. I remained impassive. After my run in with Edward Cullen yesterday, this was about as menacing as a kitten. "I don't know what the policy was at your school in Phoenix, Miss Swan, but in Forks we do not condone violence of any kind. I certainly expected better from the daughter of the Chief of Police. Clearly, this is the byproduct of living in a city where morals are less valued. Perhaps if your father had raised you, you wouldn't consider physically harming another student." He paused and I saw my opportunity.

"Do you normally reprimand students without hearing about what happened or is this just because I'm new and my mother left this town behind," I asked flatly. His face reddened.

"You punched Jessica Stanley. The evidence of that is very evident on her face not to mention the classroom full of students who saw you do it. Like I said, violence is not tolerated at Forks High School. As soon as your father gets here, we will take necessary disciplinary measures." As though he'd been waiting for his cue, there was a firm knock on the door and my father stepped into the room. He was in uniform and I was reminded of the reputation he had in this town. His eyes moved to me, moving over me in a swift inspection before they locked with mine and I don't know what he saw in them but his jaw tightened and he turned his attention to the man behind the desk.

"Chief Swan," Principal Greene said grimly, holding his hand out over his desk. Charlie shook it stiffly before sitting down next to me. He turned to me.

"What happened," he asked me lowly. I opened my mouth to finally explain but Greene cut me off.

"Your daughter attacked another student without provocation," he started and I immediately jumped up to argue but Charlie placed a hand on my arm.

"I believe I asked my daughter what happened."

Chapter 4: Lost Boy

Chapter Text

Well that escalated quickly. Get ready for some Charlie love!

The song for this chapter is Lost Boy by Ruth B.

Connect with me!

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Four: Lost Boy
BPOV

"Have you even bothered to get the whole story, Howard, or did you immediately jump to the other student's defense because you don't know my daughter?" Greene went crimson but remained silent. Charlie turned to me again, pulling on me to sit.

"Jessica and I were talking before class started and she started to say some very derogatory things about the Cullen family, including a very serious and disturbing accusation about not just his children but about Doctor Cullen and his sister."
"What did she say," he asked calmly.

"She said that the whole family engages in relationships with each other because Doctor Cullen and his sister are engaged in an incestuous relationship." Charlie's frown deepened while Principal Greene shifted in his seat uncomfortably.

"What else," Charlie asked.

"I told her that it wasn't okay to say things like that. She started yelling at me, saying that I haven't been here long enough to know anything since…" I trailed off, not wanting to bring up the memory of when my mom left and took me with her to Charlie but he nodded encouragingly, "...since Mom left you," I muttered and I noticed the slight tightening around his eyes. "So I stood up and told her that it was her bad attitude that was the reason one of the Cullen boys won't date her. I did call her a bitch, which I realize is not appropriate language for school," I said pointedly to Principal Greene, who sneered at me, "but I was prepared to come here for that. But then she said… she said that I-" I stopped. Tears started to cloud my eyes and my throat felt tight but I knew that if Charlie knew, he would understand why I had done something so out of character. "She said that at least her mom hadn't shipped her off to live with her dad because she didn't want her anymore like I had." I buried my head in my hands as the tears started to stream down my face. I felt Charlie's hand on my back, rubbing soothingly.

"Really, Miss Swan, you can dispense with the theatrics. You are hardly the victim here," Principal Greene berated.

"On the contrary, Howard, it would appear that Bella was targeted by a classmate simply for calling her out on rude and unfounded gossip about a distinguished family in our community," Charlie said evenly.

"Regardless of what Miss Stanley may or may not have said, violence is simply not tolerated. Something I think you can agree with, Chief Swan."

"And I do," Charlie said simply. "Bella is not a violent person and I fully condone punishment for her attacking another student." I sat up and nodded, wiping my tears on my sleeve. "However," he said and his voice hardened into what I recognized was the voice he used at his job, "my daughter's attack was far from unprovoked. Specifically the part about her mother. Had any of the members of this community bothered to simply ask why Bella moved here to live with me instead of just assuming and spreading whatever tall tales they wanted, they would know that Bella's mother passed away of cancer not even two months ago." Principal Greene paled visibly and began to fidget, unable to meet our eyes now. "Bella saw her through her treatment and is still grieving the loss of her mother as well as having to start over in a new place and leaving behind everything. Regardless of what she believes the reason is, Miss Stanley had absolutely no right to make such an ignorant and heartless accusation about my daughter." I looked at Charlie gratefully. His eyes softened and he placed his hand on my knee. "So, we understand that you will have to punish Bella for reacting violently but I fully expect Miss Stanley to be punished for not only sharing inappropriate gossip -gossip that should it be spread would be very damaging to an important member of this community -but for intentionally provoking my daughter to anger."

Principal Greene looked between us awkwardly, fiddling with a pen on his desk. "I understand, Chief Swan," he finally said. "I will have to get statements from her teacher and some of the other students, of course, but it would appear that your daughter was not the only one at fault." I sat back, folding my arms while he pulled papers from his desk. "Miss Swan, you will be suspended for the remainder of the week and the following week. You can have your father or another student get your assignments from your teachers and any questions can be addressed through email."

"And Miss Stanley's punishment," my father asked.

"Miss Stanley will be suspended for the remainder of the week for starting a fight and forced to apologize. I will also be meeting with her parents to address the gossip she shared. I am sure they will contact you but how you handle that is your business."

"Yes, it is," Charlie said quietly. "This town is small and gossip is inevitable, Howard. But it is imperative that men and women in leadership positions like you and I set an example and ensure that we don't allow that kind of toxic behaviour to spiral out of control." Principal Greene nodded and then stood, coming around the desk.

"Thank you for being so understanding, Chief Swan. And I'm, er, very sorry for the loss of your mother, Miss Swan, " he said, avoiding my gaze.

"Thanks, Principal Greene," I said quietly and followed my father out of the office.

"Mrs. Cope will accompany you to get your things," he said. Mrs. Cope stood and led us out the door. Jessica was sitting in the seat I had vacated, an ice pack pressed against her left eye. She glared at me as I passed.

"See you in a couple weeks, " I whispered sweetly. Her eyes widened and I walked out the door. Charlie gave me a disapproving look but I noticed his mouth twitching. The class went silent when I entered. I grabbed my backpack and walked out silently, my head held high. The bell rang and students flooded out of their classrooms. Everyone eyed Charlie and I as we walked toward the door.

"I don't really want to let you drive home," he said finally. "But I'm not sure when I'd be able to get your truck home."

"I can drive her truck home," a cheery voice said behind him. He turned to reveal a smiling Alice Cullen. "After all, it's the least I can do for a friend who defended my family."

"How would you know about that," Charlie asked, crossing his arms.

"Please, Chief Swan, even with classes in session, news travels faster than light in this place," Alice teased and Charlie chuckled.

"You must be Alice," he said, holding out a hand for her to shake. She took it and shook daintily before turning to me.

"Seriously, Bella, I can't tell you how much I appreciate you standing up to Jessica on our behalf. I'm also sorry she… well I'm sorry she said those things about your mom. That was really out of line."

"Thanks. And really, it was no problem," I said, shrugging off her thanks uncomfortably.

"Well, if it wouldn't be too much trouble, Alice, I'd be grateful," Charlie interjected a bit too loudly.

"No trouble at all, Chief Swan. I'll drop it off after school." She smiled brightly and Charlie gave her an answering smile. I pulled out my keys and handed them to her. She took them, wrapped me in a tight hug and then danced off with a wave. Charlie and I stared after her before heading for his cruiser. I felt people dawdling and watching us, whispering to each other.

Charlie was silent the whole drive home. I unlocked the front door and dropped my backpack by the door and headed for the stairs.

"Hey Bells," he called before I could go up.
"I know, Dad. I'm sorry that I made trouble for you. I know people expect things from you." He shook his head at me and I could see his eyes shining a bit brighter than usual.

"I just wanted to tell you that I am so proud of you for standing up for your friend and her family. And I'm sorry that things took the turn they did. I didn't realize how outlandish the gossip would be about you moving in. I'll address it directly from now on." I nodded, throat tight. He moved toward me and pulled me into his chest. I held onto him a little tighter than normal. After a moment, he gently pushed me away. "Well, I have to get back to the station. Will you be okay here alone?" I nodded. "Okay. I'll see you later tonight kiddo. We'll talk about this suspension then." He left, shutting the door behind him and I locked it before sliding down to rest against it.

It felt like my life was slipping out of control.

And I didn't know how to stop it.

Chapter 5: Landslide

Chapter Text

Thank you so much for the response to this! I am plugging away at this story (that keeps taking on a life of it's own because spoiler alert but I never planned on Bella punching Jessica's stupid face) and I'm trying to keep a couple chapters between the chapter I'm working on and what gets posted next. So fingers crossed I can keep up!

The song for this chapter is Landslide by Robyn Sherwell.

Connect with me!

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I’m only doing this for a friend. I don’t get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don’t get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Five: Landslide

CPOV

“You’ll never guess what happened today,” Rosalie said as soon as I opened the door. I raised my eyebrows at her as I stepped inside.

“I can’t even guess so you had better just tell me.”

“Bella Swan got into a fight,” Emmett shouted and I froze.

“She what? Is she okay?” Rosalie rolled her eyes at me.

“She’s fine. She kicked ass like the queen I knew she was,” she said proudly.

“What was this fight about,” I demanded. Jasper strolled into the room, shaking his head in disapproval.

“It wasn’t like that, Carlisle. Jessica Stanley was being… well, bitter about the fact that Edward won’t give her the time of day. She told Bella she thinks that we’re a family of incestuous ne’er-do-wells. Bella stood up for us and she started yelling at her. So Bella… insulted her character, so to speak,” he said lightly.

“She called her a bitch,” Rosalie said gleefully.

“That was rather rude,” I remarked chastisingly but she merely shrugged.

“Well, Jessica didn’t take too kindly to that and suggested that the reason Bella moved here is because her own mother didn’t want her.” I immediately felt anger rise inside of me. To make such a malicious remark to a girl who was still very much grieving the loss of a parent was just mean spirited.

“Then what,” I asked through my teeth. Jasper eyed me speculatively.

“The teacher marched her to the principal’s office. He tried to steamroll over her; didn’t even listen to her side. But she called him on that and then Charlie showed up. He heard her out and called Greene to task. Explained that Bella’s mom died of cancer two months ago. Also pointed out that the kind of gossip Jessica was spreading was inappropriate and came right out and defended you and the family. Demanded that she be punished as well for what she said and for provoking Bella. Then they left. Bella has two weeks of suspension. Alice offered to drive her truck home. She’s over there now.” I let out a breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding.

“We should probably do something to show her our gratitude. And Charlie. He’s always been very kind to our family but this was especially caring of him.”

“Like what,” Rosalie asked. “They hardly make a card for ‘Thanks for not assuming we’re incestuous bastards’. And cookies feel slightly trite for such an occasion.” Emmett laughed heartily at her joke while I paced, considering our options.

“A thank you dinner, perhaps? Unless there is something bigger we could do? Is there a financial burden we might ease or an item to be procured?”

“I’m sure if we ask Alice, she’ll have a whole host of ideas and a pretty good idea of what turns out best,” Jasper drawled and I smiled fondly. Alice lived to give gifts and I certainly wouldn’t steal her fun. Rosalie and Emmett announced they were going for a hunt but I was surprised when, instead of joining them, Jasper settled in on the chair across from the couch I had decided to sprawl across.

“Is there something I can help you with, Jasper,” I asked. The corner of his mouth quivered with a half smile.

“I was just wondering if you were intentionally keeping your growing feelings for Bella a secret,” he drawled lazily and had I been human, my jaw would have dropped.

“My ‘growing feelings’ as you call them only pertain to her relationship with you children and concern for her wellbeing. As a doctor, I care for everyone’s wellbeing,” I said lightly.

“You know, Carlisle, I understand that this is all relatively new for you but you and I both know what you’re feeling, so don’t insult my intelligence by pretending that you don’t. You’re falling for Bella Swan. Have been since you saw her last night.” I pursed my lips.

“I think you’re exaggerating the depth of my emotion, Jasper. I care for her, yes, but I wouldn’t say I’m ‘falling for’ her.”

“Then why was Alice nearly convulsing with visions while you were outside the Swan house last night? Why do I feel more than just a doctorly concern coming from you? When you heard what the Stanley girl said to her, you were consumed with rage; the kind of rage that you would feel for your companion, not a random girl you’ve never met.” I avoided his gaze, wondering if perhaps he was right and this was more than I realized.

“What… what did Alice see,” I finally asked quietly.

“The two of you, together. You were finally happy. Not the happiness you’ve resigned yourself to that stinks of loneliness. True happiness.” I inhaled deeply at his words, trying to calm my racing thoughts.
“I don’t even know her. To court her would be putting her life at risk. I can’t… I won’t change her.”

“Even if it would make both of you the happiest you’ve ever been? Why not?”

“You’ve heard the others. Rosalie laments the price she’s had to pay for this life. Edward believes our souls are damned, no matter what we do. The rest of you… well, I know that graduating from high school repeatedly certainly isn’t anyone’s idea of how they’d want to spend eternal life.” He chuckled ruefully.

“It’s not great. But we each get to spend eternity with the person we love most. We are free to pursue our interests. It isn’t nearly the damnation you allude to.”

“But it doesn’t come without a price,” I said quietly. “I am prepared to pay the price with my aloneness.”

“But are you prepared to deny her the happiness that she deserves?”

I didn’t like his question. It ignored the ethics of turning her in favor of something much easier to succumb to but much harder to justify.

Love.

I didn’t think I was in love with Bella Swan.

But I could be. If given the opportunity to nurture that seed of caring into a bud of affection, I knew that it would inevitably bloom into a love that enveloped us both in its beauty. But it hardly seemed fair to the girl. I was centuries old even if I barely passed for thirty these days. She was young, so very young, with her whole life ahead of her. A life that would surely be better without me in it.

“Look, don’t make a decision yet. Wait, maybe introduce yourself to her. See if the feeling is mutual. But please don’t dismiss it so easily because of silly arguments like salvation.”

“Careful, boy,” I teasingly warned. “I was molded by religion. I will not forsake it so easily as some of you have.” He shrugged.

“I’m not suggesting that you do. But don’t you think that God that you believe in sees what you’ve done with your eternal life? Do you really think He’d begrudge you your happiness because you were attacked by a creature of the night?” I remained silent but my mind wandered up the stairs to cross my father had made, hanging on the wall.

Truthfully, I wasn’t sure what the best course of action was. And I felt Edward’s absence bitingly as he would have listened to my thoughts, even the errant strays, and would have answered and challenged me on the questions I was truly asking myself.

Did I deserve love?

Chapter 6: The Nearness of You

Chapter Text

I have loved hearing from you guys! So I want to address this since a few have asked about my plan for our poor little lovebirds. I'm a big, fleshy kind of writer. Meaning I believe in having a meaty burger of a story instead of two people just jumping into a relationship willynilly and somehow it just all works. I love fluff. I do. But WHEN Bella and Carlisle get together, I want it to because they worked for it. (Sorry, Manda, that it's not just tooth rotting fluff. But also, in an even more real sense, I'm not sorry.)

The song for this chapter is The Nearness of You by Norah Jones.

Connect with me!

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Six: The Nearness of You

BPOV

Alice was crazy.

But it was the kind of crazy I could get behind. She’d shown up at my house after school with my truck and immediately made herself at home. She had my missed work for the week for me but I set it aside and focused on interacting with her. She had told me stories about her family, thrilling me with embarrassing things all her siblings had done and now she was sitting in the kitchen while I made lasagna for dinner.

“So how does your family work,” I asked her after a lull in the conversation. “Are you all adopted or…?”

“Esme adopted Jasper and Rosalie. They’re twins. Edward, Emmett and I all came to Carlisle over the years but being with them is almost all I can remember.” I smiled. “What about you? Any siblings?”

“Nope. Just me. My mom remarried but… he split after the first round of cancer treatment. It was just me and her until… anyway, now it’s me and Charlie. I’ve always wondered what it would be like to have a brother or sister.”

“Let me disillusion you right now: it’s a double edged sword,” she promised with a laugh. “I love Rose to death but sometimes I feel like I could just rip her head off. And I love Edward dearly but he is drowning in teen angst.” I chuckled, surprised at the casual mention of the brother that clearly had it out for me.

“It must be nice, though, being so close. Having someone in your corner no matter what.”

“I guess it is,” she conceded. “Privacy is basically nonexistent in my house but you get used to it.”

“Why’d you guys choose Forks?”

“Esme loves the rain. She wanted to be close to venues that allowed us to have family bonding time but was small. She really hates traffic.”

“And your dad was okay coming here instead of somewhere with a bigger hospital?”

“Carlisle works because he loves his work, not because he’s attached to a paycheck. He’d work for free if he could get away with it. And Forks allows him to practice a wider range of skills. In a place like LA or New York, he’d be pigeonholed into one specialty. Here, he can see all kinds of patients. He performs surgeries sometimes.” I was touched by the generous nature of her father. I wished the doctors who had treated my mom had the same mentality. The medical bills still remaining from her cancer treatments were a burden I wished I could have been rid of.

“He sounds really nice,” I said instead.

“He is. But… I get the feeling he’s lonely,” she said mournfully.

“He’s never been married?”

“No. There have been interested parties but Carlisle has always put our needs first. Actually, everyone’s needs come before him. I always assumed it was because he just didn’t want to deal with it but now… now I think he just needs someone special. You know? Someone who appreciates him for who he is but can also accept my family. It’s a weird dynamic but we’re happy.” I nodded, staring into the pot of pasta I was boiling. “Has Charlie ever dated anyone since he and your mom divorced?” I snorted out a laugh.

“Uh, no. My mom used to say that he’s married to his job. I guess to an extent that’s true but he has a duty to the people here. And I… Well, I guess he never really got over my mom. She left him because she hated it here. It’s a small town and she was always a wild spirit. It was… stifling for her to be here. I almost wish he’d moved on like she did but I guess he’s like your dad and just never found anyone who caught his interest.”

“Would you be okay if he started dating again?”

“Yeah,” I said automatically. She raised a skeptical brow. “Really, I just want him to be happy. He’s been alone as long as I can remember and in a couple years, I’ll be leaving for college. It’d be nice if he had someone. What about you? Are you sure you could handle it if your dad started dating? Got married?”

“Absolutely. It doesn’t even matter who, as long as he was happy.” It was my turn to raise a skeptical brow. “Really, Bella, I’d be okay with anyone. He could date you and I would be over the moon.” I barked out a laugh.

“Really, Alice? You’d be okay if I was your wicked stepmother?” She began to giggle.

“I already have my Prince Charming so I don’t think you could turn me into a scullery maid.”

“As funny as that is, I’m not interested in dating some middle aged guy with a receding hairline and a growing gut.” She snorted into her hand and I laughed along, amused by the image.

The phone rang and I stepped away from the stove to answer it.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Bells,” my father said from the other end. “You doing okay?”

“Yeah. Alice is here and I’m just making dinner.”

“Sorry, kid, but I have to pull a double shift tonight. One of my deputies hurt himself pretty badly and there’s no one else to cover for him.”

“That’s okay. Do you want me to bring some dinner to the station for you?”

“No. I’ll just pick something up from the diner while I’m patrolling. You going to be okay alone?”

“Yeah. Worst case scenario, I can ask Alice to stay later.” I turned to her, silently asking if that’d be okay and she gave me a thumbs up.

“Okay. Well just make sure to lock up tight tonight. I won’t be home until after you’re in bed.”

“Okay, Dad. Be safe.”

“You too, baby. See you tomorrow.” I hung up the phone and headed back to the stove, turning off the burner to the pasta.

“Your dad isn’t coming home,” she asked. I shook my head.

“He’s got to cover for another officer. Is it okay if you stay later?”

“Absolutely! I’ll stay as long as you want. You can always come over to my house, too, if you don’t want to be alone.” I was touched by how openly she welcomed me into her life. Maybe it was just me, but I’d always had trouble making friends. I assumed it was because of how awkward I was. But maybe I just needed to meet more people like Alice.

“Thanks. Would I be a terrible daughter if I wanted to just save this for tomorrow and order pizza?” Alice jumped up.

“No way! I’ll clean this up and order some pizza. You go change into some pajamas and we can have a girl’s night. I can even call Rose if you want.”

“Thanks, Alice. We can hang out with Rose another night though. I’m having a nice time with you.” She beamed at me and I smiled back tentatively, pleased at how happy I’d made her. I headed upstairs to change into pj’s and tidy my room up a bit. When I was finished, I headed downstairs.

“The lasagna is in the fridge and ready to go for tomorrow, pizza is ordered and my dad is going to drop off a bag for me just in case I end up staying the night.” We settled in the living room, debating between two romantic comedies before finally settling on one. Ten minutes in, the doorbell rang and I hopped off the recliner to answer it. I unlocked the door and pulled it open, expecting the pizza man and froze.

It wasn’t the pizza man.

At least, I didn’t think it was the pizza man.

Unless the local pizza man wore a navy blue henley shirt with the sleeves rolled up the forearm that molded to his torso like it was hugging him and had slightly longer, tousled, golden blonde hair, a face that even the gods themselves would be envious of and the exact same eyes and pallor as Alice.

“Holy pantdropper,” I breathed and I swear I saw his mouth twitch. He was holding a pizza box and a duffle bag and smiling self-consciously.

“You must be Bella,” he finally said and I wanted to wrap myself up in his voice and die. “I’m Alice’s father, Carlisle.” I just sort of nodded dumbly, unable to tear my eyes away from his face. “She asked me to drop some stuff by and to drop off your pizza.” I continued nodding until Alice came up behind me and poked me.

“Right, sorry! Come on in,” I offered, my cheeks flaming with embarrassment. I stepped aside so he could move past me. His scent washed over me as he passed and my knees nearly gave out. He smelled like freshly cut pine trees and leather bound books and I felt like just burying my head in his chest and inhaling like a druggie.

Right in front of his daughter.

I suddenly realized why she’d laughed so hard earlier when I’d described him. Carlisle Cullen was hotter than the face of the sun and I’d just made an utter fool of myself. I closed the door hurriedly and then made my way through the entry and into the family room where Carlisle was setting the pizza box on the coffee table while Alice chattered about her day. He smiled at me over her head and my stomach flipped around like it was auditioning for P.T. Barnum himself. My blush spread from my head to my toes.

“I’m going to change really fast. Some kid threw up in class today and I swear I can smell it on me,” Alice complained before dragging the duffle bag he’d carried in and flitting up the stairs.

“First door on the left,” I called. Once she’d disappeared from sight, I turned back to Carlisle. I was hot with embarrassment and my brain was drawing a blank whenever I tried to think of something to say to him. “Um, please have a seat,” I offered, gesturing towards the furniture. I collapsed gracelessly onto the recliner as he seated himself in the spot Alice had vacated.

“Thank you,” he said and I was reminded again that if this man wanted to sit and read a textbook, I’d listen for hours. I desperately searched my brain for something clever to say. “I just wanted to… well say thank you. I heard about what happened in school today.” I ducked my head awkwardly.

“It was really not that big of a deal,” I muttered.

“Maybe not,” he agreed, “but I appreciate it nonetheless. This town is small and as such, my family and I haven’t really found our place among the people here. To be honest, we have a hard time fighting in.”

“Preaching to the choir there, Doc,” I mumbled and he laughed deeply.

Well hell, if I thought his speaking voice was irresistible, his laugh made me want to rip his shirt off.

“Maybe I am. I guess we outcasts will just have to stick together,” he suggested, ochre eyes twinkling.

“Can I ask you a question,” I asked suddenly.

“Anything.”

“Why do you guys all look the same?”

“Beg your pardon,” he asked, head tilted to the side curiously.

“Alice told me that all of your and Esme’s kids are adopted. But you all have the same color eyes and skin. So I was just wondering how that was.” He regarded me contemplatively.

“You know, I don’t think I’ve ever had anyone ask me that,” he mused. “You’re the first to notice and say something. I have a genetic disorder that is somewhat tricky. It is, at the very least, restrictive. When I came across Edward, I noticed that he had the same disorder and wanted to open my home to him, help him treat it.”

“That’s so kind of you. What is the disorder called?”

“It’s quite rare but it’s called Hirudo Anemia.”

“Wow. Yeah I’ve never heard of that,” I said with an exaggerated grimace. He laughed charmingly and I joined. “Not that I spend my free time reading about rare genetic disorders.”

“What do you spend your free time doing,” he asked, propping his chin on his palm and watching me.

“Mostly reading and listening to music. Nothing exciting.”

“On the contrary, I think you and I both know that reading can be very exciting. What do you like to read?”

“Anything really. I’ve read most of the classics.”

“What’s your favorite book?”

“Who’s your favorite child,” I sassed and he laughed again. “Okay, fine. I reread Wuthering Heights once a year.”

“Interesting choice. It’s certainly not the lighthearted romance one finds in an Austen novel.”

“True but I kind of love that. Heathcliffe and Cathy were truly terrible people and their love was toxic but from all of that comes this beautiful story of redemption for Hareton and Catherine. They could have continued that cycle of dysfunction and instead they chose to do the opposite.”

“Ah, so you’re a romantic,” he said teasingly and I blushed furiously.

“Isn’t everyone? Secretly, at heart?”

“I’m a romantic but it certainly isn’t a secret.”

How in the hell had this guy never been caught by a woman? Lines like that and I was ready to throw myself in his arms, climb onto his steed and ride gracefully into the sunset.

What the hell was wrong with me?!

This was Alice’s father. Was I really flirting with him?

I shifted suddenly, turning to look at the stairs behind me.

“I wonder if Alice is okay,” I mused.

“I think I heard the shower going. She’s obviously taking the ‘make yourself at home’ offer to the extreme. I thought I’d taught her better manners than that,” he lamented. I giggled and a smile grew on his face, stunning me. How was a man this good looking and young possibly a father of three teenagers?

“She certainly isn’t shy,” I remarked. He chuckled.

“Not in the least.” I looked around at our mess and my eyes landed on the pizza box.

“Would you like some pizza,” I asked him.

“Oh, that’s okay. I wouldn't want to intrude on your night.”

“Please, you brought it and I get the feeling Alice is taking her time. Here, I’ll grab some plates,” I said and I stood hurriedly to go get the plates. I walked into the kitchen, a jittery excitement making my hands shake. I grabbed three plates out of the cabinet but lost my grip on them. They crashed to the floor, shattering into pieces all around me. I looked around me, tears starting to form in my eyes.

“Bella?” Carlisle came into the doorway and stopped, taking in the scene. “Don’t move. I’ll grab the broom and clean this up.”

“Pantry,” I said, nodding towards a closet in the hall behind him. He appeared a moment later with the broom and dustpan and began to sweep up the shards of destroyed plates. I felt awkward just standing there while he cleaned so I took a careful step forward.

“Here, I can-” I started to say but I wobbled and stepped down on a particularly large shard. Pain burned through my foot and then I felt warm liquid flowing around it. My head began to spin and my breathing became labored. Sweat beaded on my forehead as I looked down to see a small puddle of red spreading on the floor.

“Bella,” Carlisle said urgently but it sounded like he was at the other end of a large tunnel. Black spots exploded across my vision and then everything went dark.

Chapter 7: Savior

Chapter Text

Yeah okay, that was little bit cliffie. But I cannot WAIT for you guys to read this one. Almost as much as I can't wait for you to read the chapter after this or the one after that! I am so psyched about this story!

The song for this chapter is Savior by OneRepublic.

Connect with me!
Twitter: teamdemonmonkey
Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Seven: Savior
CPOV

“Bella,” I called urgently, an unfamiliar panic settling into my chest. She was white as a sheet and sweating. I could smell the blood permeating the air in the kitchen with it’s fragrant scent. I watched as her eyes grew glassy and then rolled back in her head. She started falling and I rushed to catch her before she could hit the floor, cradling her gently in my arms as I checked her over. She seemed unharmed save for the gash in her foot.

“I’ll go get your bag,” Alice said hurriedly as she flew down the stairs, tossing a towel at me as she passed. I wrapped Bella’s foot in it to move her.

“Don’t breathe when you come back in,” I warned her as she ran to my car and grabbed my medical bag from the trunk. I carried Bella gently to the couch, laying her down and covering her with a blanket. I propped her damaged foot on a couple of throw pillows and sat, inspecting the wound. The blood was starting to get sluggish and there were shards of plate embedded in the flesh and muscle. Alice appeared with my bag in hand. “A bowl please, Alice. Would you also be kind enough to clean up the mess in the kitchen?” She darted into the kitchen and appeared a moment later, a large metal bowl in her hands. She pecked my cheek before disappearing again and a few moments later the astringent scent of bleach began to overwhelm the smell of Bella’s blood.

I slipped gloves on and quickly injected a low dose of anaesthetic around the wound to soften her discomfort. I then used my forceps to pull the shards of glass from her foot, placing them in the bowl next to me. I worked quickly, double checking for any missed shards after I’d finished before pulling out saline, antiseptic, a needle driver, pickups, a needle and suture thread. I flushed her wound until it was clean and then dried it gently with some gauze. I prepared the needle and thread, keeping tabs on her heart rate in the back of my mind as I began to suture her foot. I weaved a running mattress stitch up her wound, pulling the flesh closed. Once finished, I smoothed ointment over the wound and wrapped her foot. I gathered my instruments and took them out to the kitchen sink. Alice was sitting on the counter with her eyes closed but I could see her twitching as visions assaulted her.

“What are you searching for,” I asked her quietly in case Bella started to wake. She grimaced.

“I’m testing out different decisions. I’ll let you know when I’ve figured out the best course,” she promised. We sat in silence while I cleaned my instruments.

“I’m proud of you,” I murmured. “You didn’t lose control once, even when she was still bleeding.” She opened one eye to grin at me.

“I understand why you wanted us to integrate with humans now. If I didn’t love Bella the way I do, I don’t know that I would have been able to control myself. But now that I know her, know who she’ll be to this family, I couldn’t imagine hurting her.” I smiled sadly.

“That is all I’ve wanted for you children. But I hope you aren’t expecting more for her than I can give her.”

“You have your reservations, Carlisle, but I’ve looked into hundreds of futures and Bella joining our family as your mate is inevitable.” I allowed myself a moment of indulgence and imagined what she spoke of: Bella, changed, the beauty of immortality only enhancing her gorgeous features. Bella, beside me and supporting me, spending our nights together. I could almost feel her in my arms as we laid together on the couch reading books from my library. I shook myself out of the fantasy and sighed.

“You know better than anyone that the future can change,” I reminded her.

“You betting against me, Carlilse,” she asked with a glint of resolve in her eyes.

“I’m merely refusing to assume that that is the only outcome,” I replied diplomatically. Her eyes narrowed slightly.

“Bella will be waking up in less than a minute,” she said. I nodded and grabbed the pizza box that lay forgotten on the table, dropping it in the kitchen.

“Will you please heat this up and grab a glass of water? She might be in shock when she wakes.” Alice hopped down and got to work. I moved back into the den, settling on the edge of the coffee table at Bella’s side. Her heart rate was picking up, her eyelids twitching. Then I was graced with her warm, espresso eyes fluttering open.

“Car-Carlisle? What happened,” she asked groggily.

“You had an unfortunate run-in with some plates. Do you remember?” Her brow furrowed and God help me but it made me want to kiss her. I berated myself internally. There was no point in even engaging in such ideas.

“I cut my foot,” she finally said. She flew up and looked down at her foot in a panic. I pushed against her gently and she conceded, laying back on the pillow.

“I already stitched you up. I’m afraid that I didn’t have any dissolvable thread with me so I’ll have to remove them in about a week or so. I also took care of the mess in the kitchen.”

“You…” She trailed off and she stared at me and I selfishly reveled in the attention. “You didn’t have to do that.” I chuckled.

“Well, I daresay one of the benefits of having a doctor as a family friend is that it saves you many trips to the hospital. It was no trouble.”

“Thank you. I’m so sorry. I would have taken care of it, except I saw the blood.”

“Have you always had such a violent reaction to blood?”

“Yes. I… I had to leave whenever they had to do blood draws or IV’s on my mom. I… I’ve felt… guilty that I couldn’t be there while it was happening.”

“I’m sure she appreciated that you were there nonetheless,” I said gently. She wiped a stray tear that had slipped from the corner of her eye.

“I miss her,” she muttered, probably lower than she thought I could hear.

“That’s understandable. It is hard to outlive a parent, especially when they were taken from us long before they should have been.” She turned her sad eyes to me and my heart broke.

“Did you… lose a parent,” she asked timidly and I nodded sadly.

“Both of them. My mother died giving birth to me. My father never spoke of her so I don’t know much about her. He died when I was just barely into adulthood. We didn’t… part on the best terms. He was trying to teach me the family business but I didn’t want to do things the same way.”

“I’m so sorry. What did your father do?”

“He was a pastor.” I noted the shock on her face. “He was a fervently religious man. He often saw sin and evil where none existed and I didn’t agree with that. I wanted to believe in the good in people, to be more careful and methodical about approaching things. We often argued about it. In fact, our last moments together were spent arguing.”

“That must have been terrible.” I mulled over her words briefly. It was terrible. We’d argued about my taking our congregation on a vampire hunt that night. He didn’t like the methods I had employed to find the coven. I disliked his ability to assign guilt so quickly, especially to innocent people. Years after I had been changed, I went back to our old parish, hanging back at the edge of the city, hiding in the trees. He’d contracted an illness and was hovering between life and death. And even in his delirium, he had shouted accusations and judgments.

“It certainly wasn’t how I would have liked our parting to be. But it was his death that piqued my desire to become a doctor instead of a pastor. It is the most fulfilling work I’ve ever experienced. I wish I could thank him for that.” She placed a hand on mine and I lifted my head in surprise.

“He knows,” she said with a smile. “I know my mom is up there somewhere, happy and healthy.” I placed my other hand over hers and squeezed it.

Alice’s thundering steps as she hurried down the stairs penetrated the bubble of intimacy that seemed to surround us. Bella snatched her hand back from mine and turned to face Alice, face growing rosy with embarrassment. I suppressed a smile and turned my attention to Alice.

“Sorry! Jasper called while I was in the shower and- is that blood,” she asked as she rounded the corner and came to a stop, staring at the towel under Bella’s foot that I hadn’t taken yet. I almost rolled my eyes fondly at Alice’s theatrics. Bella pointedly ignored the towel under her foot.

“No?”

“I’m pretty sure that you aren’t supposed to answer that question with another question,” she pointed out. “What happened? Are you okay?”

“Just being my usual clumsy self.” Bella waved off her concern before smiling at me. “Your dad got it all taken care of.”

“He’s so handy to have around, right,” Alice teased and Bella laughed.

“Unfortunately, I really do have to be going,” I said, standing. “I have an early shift at the hospital tomorrow. Bella, it was a pleasure to meet you. Remember to stay off that foot for the next week. Please let me know if you need anything.” I moved away from her, forcing my feet to move even though I had the inexplicable desire to do nothing more than hold her to me and breathe in her beautiful scent. I pulled Alice into a hug. “Get some sleep, sweetheart. You still have school tomorrow.” In a volume too low for Bella to hear, I murmured, “Take care of her.” Alice hugged me back enthusiastically.

“Of course. I’ll see you tomorrow.” She released me and danced over to sit by Bella, who was staring up at me, looking just a little crestfallen.

“Goodnight, ladies.”

“Night,” she said. “Thank you again.” I smiled at her fondly before waving and leaving the house. Once in the cool night air, I took a deep breath, trying to clear my muddled thoughts. I walked to my car and climbed in. I hesitated for a moment before pulling away from her house and making my way home.

I felt panic gripping me as I drove.

I wanted nothing more than to lose myself in Isabella Swan.

And I knew that would only end poorly for the both of us.

Chapter 8: Geronimo

Chapter Text

Sorry for the late update. I made myself very sick and honestly, breathing has been a struggle let alone thinking straight. Hopefully that won't be an issue now.

The song for this chapter is Geronimo by Sheppard.

Connect with me!
Twitter: teamdemonmonkey
Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Eight: Geronimo

BPOV

I woke up the next morning to a text from Alice promising to have someone come help me. I sat up stiffly, regretting my decision to sleep on the couch and not in my bed last night.

“Morning, sleepyhead,” an amused voice came from somewhere behind me. I twisted quickly and saw Rosalie standing behind me, examining the pictures of me hanging on the walls, documenting my years of awkwardness Charlie insisted on showcasing. She looked as incomparable as ever whereas I was pretty sure I had a drool trail on my cheek and my hair was a ratty nest of chaos.

“Hey, Rosalie,” I said awkwardly, rubbing at my hair to attempt to get it under control. “Whatcha doing here,” I asked pointedly. She was unfazed by my attitude and smiled at me. God, she was even prettier when she smiled. I could get a complex just by looking at her.

“Alice asked us to come hang out with you today. She said Carlisle has you non-weight bearing on that foot and we’re here to be your not so humble servants. I nodded and then stopped, frowning.

“Wait, we?”

“Well yeah! Couldn’t let Rose have all the fun skipping school,” a deep masculine voice said behind her as Emmett came strolling out of the kitchen, holding a citrus reamer. I flushed as he grinned at me, winking. He was handsome as the day was long with thick, rich brown curls and his chiseled features. He had two deep dimples and he smelled of mischief and trouble.

But he was no Carlisle.

“Is this a sex toy? What kind of kinky stuff is your dad into, Swan?” I rolled my eyes.

“It’s to juice lemons and limes. But if you want it shoved up your ass, I’d be more than happy to oblige,” I offered sweetly. He immediately let out deep belly laughs, clutching the doorway for support. Rosalie grinned at me.

“Yeah, I definitely like you,” she said, walking over to sit by me. Emmett finally got himself together and joined us, sprawling across the recliner.

“I like you, too,” he announced. “You’re quick.” I placed a hand on my heart.

“It probably feels that way when you’re so slow,” I placated and he beamed at me. I rolled my eyes and turned back to Rosalie. “You guys don’t have to ditch for me. I can take care of myself.”

“Nope,” she said, popping the ‘P’. “Alice said you’d say that and to remind you that if Carlisle has to fix your foot again, he’ll get into his grumpy mood where he gives you a long lecture about listening to your doctor followed by the long list of possible negative side effects of not listening to your doctor. Trust me, we’re saving you from a snoozefest.” I warmed at the thought that Carlisle would care that much. Then I mentally slapped myself and rolled my eyes at myself. Carlisle was a doctor: he cared because it was his job.

“Aren’t you going to get a lecture for skipping school,” I taunted.

“Nah, Carlisle is pretty great about letting us make our decisions. As long as it doesn’t become a habit,” Emmett reassured me.

“Sounds like Charlie,” I muttered, then remembered my father’s call last night. “Oh crap, Charlie,” I exclaimed, jumping up from the couch. As soon as I put my weight on my foot, I hissed in pain and my legs buckled. Rosalie was at my side before I could fall, sitting me on the couch.

“Charlie has come and gone. Alice said he got in around two and was gone by eight.”

“Oh.”

“Now,” Emmett announced, heaving himself out of Charlie’s recliner with more grace than I would expect from someone his size, “it’s time for breakfast. I have made you a marvelous feast. Be awed, mortal, for I do not bless many with my spectacular culinary gifts.” He walked to the kitchen while speaking before coming back with a tray of food. He set it in front of me and I froze, unsure what I had been expecting. There were runny scrambled eggs, burnt bacon, nearly raw sausage, lumpy oatmeal and orange juice.

“It’s, um... “ I searched for a polite way to compliment the hot plate of salmonella and E. Coli in front of me.

“You idiot,” Rosalie laughed, knocking Emmett on the back of his head with her hand. “I told you you didn’t know what the hell you were doing! Are you trying to poison her?”

“Trust me, I’d take poison over this,” I said dryly. Emmett laughed.

“It didn’t seem that hard.”

“Emmett, my darling, my dearest,” I crooned. “I love you from the bottom of my heart. But I one thousand percent do not trust your cooking. Stay out of my kitchen.” He started laughing again, throwing his hands up in concession. “Thank you for the effort but I can make myself something,” I said. Rosalie sighed dramatically.

“At least use these this time,” she offered, grabbing a set of crutches from the entryway and offering them to me. I grinned at her, grateful for some level of independence. I grabbed them and heaved myself off the couch.

“Need help,” Emmett asked, pulling out a sports magazine Charlie had shoved in the pocket of his recliner.

“Nope. Crutches and I go way back. Thanks though. Can I get you guys anything?”

“Nah, we ate before we came.” I shuffled into the kitchen and grabbed a bowl and spoon. I turned to grab a box of cereal out of the cupboard. When I turned back to my bowl, it was gone and I looked around until I noticed Rosalie sitting at the table with it and the milk. I sighed.

“Guess you two weren’t kidding about the servant thing,” I said. She shrugged.

“We promised. Sorry not sorry.” I slid into my seat gracelessly.

“Could be worse I guess,” I muttered. I ate my cereal while she flipped through a car magazine I was guessing she’d brought with her. When I had finished, she jumped up and grabbed my dishes before I could move. “This is going to be a very long day,” I complained.

“Come home to our house then. You’ll be less inclined to do anything and Emmett won’t accidentally break anything.”

“That happened one time and you promised not to mention it ever again,” Emmett whined from the den. I chuckled.

“It’ll be fun,” Rosalie sing-songed. I scowled at her before sighing.

“Fine. Let me go get dressed and semi-put together at least.”

It took me all of ten minutes to get ready. I was tempted, for just a moment, to go all out so I wouldn’t be so obviously in a different league than Rosalie. Then I felt extremely silly. Rosalie was beautiful but her beauty didn’t diminish my own even if I felt like a sack of potatoes next to her. Instead, I brushed through my hair, braided it and threw on a red waffle-knit shirt and a pair of black leggings. It felt weird not worrying about school. I wasn’t sure how I was going to keep myself occupied for the next two weeks without it eating up six or more hours of the day. As soon as I was back downstairs, Rosalie and Emmett met me by the door.

“Ready,” Rosalie asked and I nodded. I followed them out of the house and locked the door behind me. Rosalie was climbing into the passenger seat of a huge red Jeep. Emmett was waiting for me next to the open door of the backseat. I swung myself over to him, careful to watch for slick spots the crutches would slip on and tossed the crutches on the floor of the Jeep, eyeing the step up and trying to figure out just how I was going to get in. Emmett gripped my waist and lifted me into the Jeep gently. I thanked him quietly, face flushing. I was no stranger to injury but I wasn’t used to having quite so much help. I fumbled with the complex harness system in place of the seatbelt while Emmett climbed into his seat.

We drove through town and then out towards the edge of town. Emmett turned off on a driveway I would have missed but for the mailbox sticking out before the road. Their driveway was long, the house set at least a half a mile back from the road. The tunnel of trees opened up to a clearing and I took it in.

Carlisle’s house.

It was a large, graceful house, rectangular and well-proportioned, painted a faded white. It stood three stories tall, with a deep porch that wrapped around the front of the house and was painted white. It was picturesque against the backdrop of trees and the distant mountains. The front yard was made up of the driveway circling in front of the house and connecting with a large outbuilding that appeared to be the garage. There were flowers and shrubs in front of the porch. Emmett pulled up in front of the walk to the door and parked. Rosalie hopped out and then pulled my door open, grabbed the crutches and helped me slide from the seat.

“You’re stronger than you look,” I complimented her and she smirked.

“Don’t let the face fool you. I throw around cars in my spare time.” She led me up the front steps to the porch, opening the door for me while Emmett moved the car into the garage. I could vaguely see the outline of several shiny cars, one of which I recognized from a James Bond movie Charlie and I watched together.

“We all have our favorites. But mine is the shiny red one,” she said proudly. I whistled as I looked over the car she spoke of. “I completely rebuilt the engine. I don’t get to drive it as much as I’d like.”

“Wow. It’s beautiful.” She beamed proudly and I felt like I was getting a view of the real Rosalie Hale. Not the shallow, stuck up beauty that Jessica had described, the Rosalie that she displayed for the town and the world. This was Rose, a car enthusiast and talented mechanic. And I had no doubt that if she had tried to talk shop with any of the guys at school, they would have heckled her right out the door. “That’s really cool, Rose. I don’t know if you’ve seen the beast of a truck that I drive but I clearly know nothing about cars and I still know that you have to be kick ass to rebuild anything.” She softened for a moment, staring at me with what might have been relief.

“Well, I have seen your truck and if you ever need any work done on it, I hope you’ll bring it to me,” she murmured, almost shyly. I raised an eyebrow at her.

“Are you kidding? You’re the only one I will trust with that rust bucket.” She laughed and led me further into the house as Emmett came jogging up the porch steps.

I looked around the room we were in, awed by the high ceilings and simple but tasteful decor. The whole back wall was windows, letting in all the daylight and making the room bright. A shiny grand piano sat off the entry and I wondered if any of them could play it or if it was just for show.

“Hey, Bella, you want to play some video games,” Emmett asked as he came into the house and kicked off his shoes.

“I don’t know. I’m not really good at that kind of stuff,” I said hesitantly. He scoffed at me and all but carried me over to the couch before pulling out a sleek gaming system and some controllers. Rose grabbed one and sprawled across an armchair, long legs hanging over the arm. Emmett settled on the couch by me and handed me a controller. I took it with a mumbled thanks. He loaded up a shooter game and we all selected our characters. The game started and I immediately began pressing the buttons, moving through the virtual world, looking for targets. When I found Emmett and Rosalie’s characters, we began to engage in combat, shooting at each other and throwing grenades. I got Emmett between the eyes and he gave me some side eye while he respawned. I bit my lip in concentration, hiding behind a wall to avoid Rose’s attack.

Five minutes later, Emmett threw down his controller.

“You’re a lying liar that lies,” he accused, pointing at me. “You lulled me into a false sense of security and made me believe you didn't know how to play! That is the EIGHTH time you’ve taken me out and I’ve only gotten you ONCE!” I laughed riotously.

“I was killed more than you and you don’t hear me complaining,” Rose said.

“You aren’t getting your ass handed to you by… by…”

“By a girl,” I asked with a saccharine smile and Emmett narrowed his eyes at me.

“This is war, Swan.”

“Oh, you tease me so.”

“I don’t know, Bella, Em is pretty relentless. You don’t know what you’ve unleashed,” Rose warned with a laugh. I shrugged.

“I’m down for a little feud. Might liven up the next couple of weeks.”

“Especially with Alice gone,” Rose muttered but I heard anyway. My good mood evaporated.

“Wait, Alice left? Where did she go?” Rose and Emmett exchanged a loaded look with each other.

“She’s just taking care of some family stuff,” Rose said offhandedly.

“What family stuff? She was at my house just this morning!”

“She’s in Alaska,” Emmett said, sticking another game in the console.

“Emmett!” Rosalie hissed.

“What? She’s smart. She would have figured it out eventually,” Emmett defended.

“Alaska? Isn’t that where Edward…” I trailed off, piecing all the information together.

“Yes. She’s gone up to knock some sense into him. Or recruit him. Or both. No one ever really knows what Alice is doing,” Emmett said.

“What exactly is his problem,” I asked in frustration. “Does he have uncontrollable anger issues or what?”

“Edward has been having issues with his emotions,” Rosalie said boredly. “He had a less than pleasant experience with a girl where we lived before and we all thought he was over it. But apparently, he’s still struggling with it. Alice is going to see if he’s doing any better.”

“You said she’s recruiting him. Recruiting him for what?” They shared another brief glance.

“Alice is having a disagreement about something and she’s hoping that if she gets Edward to side with her, she’ll win.”

“Who is she arguing with? And why would Edward make a difference?”

“Okay, Cullen Family 101,” Emmett said, turning to face me. “Alice has very specific ideas about how things should be. Normally, we all just go with it. She’s usually right anyway. But she’s trying to talk Carlisle into something and in a shocking move of defiance, he’s not going along with her. She’s hoping Edward will make a difference since Edward and Carlisle are tighter than my asscheeks and Edward can talk him into almost anything.” I frowned at him.

“So Alice can just jet off to Alaska to get Edward?”

“You don’t know just how headstrong Alice can be. When she makes up her mind about something, nothing deters her. She’ll be back soon. Meanwhile, you get to hang with us.”

“Can I just ask one question,” I asked after a few minutes.

“Shoot.”

“Has Edward ever… hurt anyone?”

“No. I wasn’t kidding when I told you he was boring. Honestly, I think that his breakup was worse than he let on. Just some unresolved issues,” Rosalie assured me. I nodded, unsure what to make the Edward they described and the one I had encountered. “I’m done with video games. Bella, why don’t I do your nails?”

“Um, okay. I’ve never really been one for having my nails done but if it’ll make you happy,” I said lamely. She jumped up and ran up the stairs. I could hear shuffling before she came back down with a makeup box.

“Let’s go into the dining room.” I followed her on my crutches and she led me into a room off the front room, past a large, white kitchen that I spied through an open door. There was a huge wood table taking up most of the space with about a dozen chairs around it. We sat at the end near the doorway and Rosalie began to spread out a towel and several terrifying looking tools followed by nail polish.

“So how long have you and Emmett been a thing,” I asked while she prepped everything.

“It feels like forever. I don’t really like to think about what my life was like before him.”

“Bad ex,” I guessed and her face darkened.

“The worst,” she said darkly and I felt a shudder race up my spine. “We were pretty serious but I discovered too late that he wasn’t who I thought he was. It changed me,” she admitted. “When I met Emmett… I wasn't necessarily looking for love but something about him… it just clicked with me.”

“The dimples,” I whispered conspiratorially and she laughed.

“Definitely the dimples. But it was also deeper than that. Seeing him, he sort of just settled into my heart where I didn’t think there was any room and took root.”

“Awh, that is so sweet.”

“What about you? Did you leave a boyfriend behind in Arizona?” I snorted out a laugh.

“Hardly. There wasn’t really time for that kind of thing while I was taking care of my mom.”

“What about before your mom got sick,” she asked, taking my hands and starting to work on them.

“No. No one ever really caught my interest. I guess I’m just looking for something special, like you and Emmett.”

Someone like Carlisle Voice-Like-Molten-Chocolate Cullen.

I blushed as I thought about it. Something about Carlisle did the exact same thing to me as Emmett had done to Rose. There was just something about Carlisle that had planted itself inside of me and refused to relinquish its hold.

And I knew that I shouldn’t want to nurture that piece of me.

Because he was older than me.

He was friends with my dad.

His daughters were fast becoming my best friends.

But I still wanted nothing more than to start a garden in my heart where love bloomed.

Chapter 9: Poker Face

Chapter Text

Sorry for the slow updates. The littles infected me with their gross, stupid germs and it makes it hard to write anything that isn't Bella drowning in tissues and questioning various at home medical procedures to relieve sinus pressure.

The song for this chapter is Poker Face by Lea Michele and Idina Menzel. It'll make sense.

Connect with me!

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I’m only doing this for a friend. I don’t get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don’t get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Nine: Poker Face

CPOV

I’d never been more grateful for my ability to perform my job without having to think about it. I’d spent all night with Bella occupying my thoughts and nothing changed when I prepared for my shift at the hospital. I replayed every moment with her from the night before, the feeling of her hand gripping mine as we shared the painful truths of our past. Today had been especially busy at work, a logging accident filling the emergency room and surgeries with injured men and women. And yet through every patient I had seen, I still hadn’t been able to dismiss her beautiful face from my thoughts. I just wanted to get home and see if maybe Alice was over at her house again so I would have an excuse to see her.

As I pulled up the house, I slowed down, confused as the sounds of the house met me and I picked out a very human heartbeat amongst the noise. I pulled into the garage and turned off the car, listening to the chaos before I made an appearance.

“Raise,” Emmett said confidently and I heard the click of plastic chips hitting each other.

“Call,” Jasper said and more chips clicked together.

“Call.” I shouldn’t have been surprised to hear Bella’s voice but hearing the sweet sound in the place I often found solitude from the world was unexpected. I felt a warm approval washing over me in a wave and I clenched my hands in frustration.

I should not -no, could not -be having these feelings for her. Regardless of my advanced age and her being little more than a child, societal norms forbid it. Not to mention the danger that would be imposed on her if she found out what I was. The Volturi were not forgiving and secrecy was valued above all else, especially human life.

I couldn’t steal her life from her.

I made my way from the garage to the front steps in a flash, my body betraying my determination to maintain an emotional distance. I walked into the foyer, putting on a show of shaking out my jacket and settling in before pretending to notice Bella. Her eyes were fixed on me and when the smile came automatically to my lips, her skin grew a delectable rosy pink and her heart rate picked up.

“Oh hey, Carlisle,” Jasper greeted. “I forgot today was your short day.” It was a bald lie. He couldn’t have forgotten if he’d wanted to.

“Hello, kids. Bella, it’s so lovely to see you again.” Her blush deepened.

“Ooooh, what’s the matter, Bella? Cat got your tongue,” Emmett teased. I gave him a hard look. I was about to verbally rebuke him when Bella spoke.

“Hey Emmett, want to play some video games again,” she asked sweetly but there was a hard edge to her voice. His smile disappeared and he glared at her.

“No. You cheat,” he pouted.

“Come on, Emmett. We’ll make it an even thirteen to two,” she taunted and that small glimmer of attraction grew as I watched her hold her own against Emmett’s antics.

“Now, now, you’re already kicking Emmett’s ass at this game,” Rosalie reminded them teasingly.

“What game would that be,” I asked, moving further into the room, pretending to look at their set up curiously.

“Texas Holdem,” Rosalie said. I tried to hide my disapproval but I could feel the frown on my mouth.

“Really, children, gambling. What kind of examples are you setting for Bella?” In a volume lower and faster than she could hear I said, “It is supremely unfair of you to gamble when you can hear her heartbeat,” I chastised.

“It would be if her heartbeat gave her away,” Jasper agreed in the same register. “But her heartbeat doesn’t even stutter. She’s kicked my trash twice already.”

“Actually, poker was my idea,” Bella admitted. “Emmett got tired of losing during video games.” Emmett stuck his tongue out at her.

“Getting suspended from school and gambling, huh? Should I be worried that you’re going to turn my children into delinquents, Miss Swan?” She went red again but I noticed the way her heartbeat sped up when I said her name and her eyes dilated.

“Not much of a journey for some of them,” she countered with a smirk. I laughed so hard I half expected to feel tears in my eyes.

“Well, don’t let me get in the way of your corruption. I’m sure you’re doing it all in the name of job security for your father,” I teased with a wink.

“In a town this small, we have to make our own trouble,” she sighed mournfully. I felt electrified by her banter and I had to physically root myself to the spot so that I wouldn’t sweep her into my arms and place the passionate kiss to her lips that I was aching for.

“Could you stop flirting with my dad so that I can blow your mind with this hand,” Emmett complained. I gave him a dark look while Bella just smiled sweetly at him, the picture of calm.

“By all means, let’s finish.” Emmett laid his cards down first, looking gleefully pleased with himself.

“Who’s ready to party because I got a full house. Suck it losers!”

“Emmett, I suggest you remember a semblance of manners or you’ll be sleeping in a tree tonight,” I warned and Bella giggled to herself.

“Damn, Em,” Jasper drawled. “Full house. That’s hard to beat. Luckily for me, I have Ace and three of his friends.” He laid his cards down and Emmett swore. I slapped the back of his head and he grumbled to himself. “Maybe you shouldn’t assume ya’ll could beat a Texan at Texas Holdem.”

“You’re from Texas,” Bella asked him interestedly and I felt an irrational surge of jealousy. Jasper smirked at me knowingly.

“Yes, ma’am,” he said, exaggerating his accent.

“That’s so cool! Where in Texas?”

“Galveston. It’s down on the coast.”

“My mom and I went there a few years ago. It was the beginning of our Civil War tour when she went through her historian phase.” I saw Jasper’s eyes light with interest.

“You went on a Civil War tour?”

“Yeah. We started in Texas and made our way East. We visited Georgia, Fort Sumter, Vicksburg, Manassas, Appomattox, Chattanooga, Gettysburg; most of the major historic sites. It was one of the most interesting phases my mom ever went through. I learned way more than I did when we covered that chapter in my history class.”

“Right,” Jasper said passionately. “It was such a complex war and most people miss that.”

“Jasper’s a Civil War buff,” Rosalie said fondly. “He and Carlisle could talk about it for hours, even if Carlisle is more of a Revolutionary War man.” Her eyes turned to me in amusem*nt.

“The Revolutionary War, huh? That’s really fortunate,” Bella said with a smirk.

“Why is that,” I asked, my own smirk forming unbidden on my own lips.

“Because the Revolutionary War was declaring freedom from King George the Third. And I just happen to have a royal flush.” She flipped her cards over to reveal her hand and Emmett began to utter a string of expletives until Rosalie kicked him under the table.

“HOW ARE YOU SO GOOD AT THINGS? YOU CAN BARELY WALK WITHOUT TRIPPING? YOU COULD LITERALLY TRIP OVER YOUR OWN SHADOW!”

“Hey, my shadow is a tricky little bastard. He’s always trying to bring me down to his level.”

“BUT SOMEHOW YOU BEAT THE EVERLOVING SH-CRAP OUT OF ME AT HALO AND POKER?” Her triumphant grin faltered and Jasper inadvertently rubbed at his chest where his heart was.

“There wasn’t a lot to do in the hospital. We spent a lot of time there and these were some of the things my mom had the energy to do with me,” she admitted quietly and Emmett slumped in his seat, embarrassed and ashamed. I was filled with an almost crippling sympathy for her, wanting nothing more than to take this pain from her. Everyone was sitting silently and it was only then that I realized we were missing someone and her presence wasn’t heard elsewhere.

“Where’s Alice,” I asked suddenly. My children froze but Bella’s eyebrows shot up.

“She went to Alaska and didn’t even tell you?”

“She went to Alaska,” I demanded, eyes settling on Jasper.

“She’s on some sort of mission. All she told me was that she had to talk to Edward. She promised to be back in a few days.” I pinched the bridge of my nose. I had been happy to find that my children were connecting and bonding with Bella but now I was feeling supremely annoyed that none of them seemed particularly concerned about maintaining the details or appearance of our family hierarchy.

“Do you normally wear your scrubs home,” Bella asked me suddenly. I looked up at her sincere face.

“What?”

“Most of the doctors we saw wore normal clothes. Only the interns, residents and surgeons walked around in scrubs.” I looked down at myself. I was wearing a pair of the hospital’s navy scrubs.

“No actually. I very rarely wear scrubs but I had a patient today with a kidney stone who got sick on me. Normally I have spare clothes in my office but I must have forgotten to replace them the last time I wore them.”

I hadn’t forgotten.

I’d gone to the small locker in my office, expecting to find a stack of neatly pressed shirts and slacks and found nothing instead. “I should probably change,” I said.

“You don’t have to,” Bella answered and I raised an eyebrow at her. She blushed deeply. “I mean, don’t feel like you have to change on my account,” she amended. I half smiled and sat on the couch, near her but not close enough to touch her, even though I was nearly itching with desire to. Rose and Emmett got up and headed upstairs, making an excuse about Emmett licking his wounds. Jasper made an excuse about going to call Alice and disappeared. Once again I was alone with Bella.

“How is your foot,” I asked her, gesturing vaguely. She rolled her eyes.

“I don’t know how I’m going to handle not putting any weight on it. Rose and Emmett wouldn’t let me do anything today.” I was warmed by the effort they’d taken to keep her comfortable. “But I know that they can’t just skip school until this heals. So I guess tomorrow will be a day for reading and binge watching tv.” I chuckled.

“You know, most kids would love to get out of school for two weeks,” I teased.

“Yeah, well, I’ve never really been like that. My mom was such a free spirit, I learned from a young age to be responsible.” Her words were meant lightheartedly but I was filled with a profound sadness at the knowledge that she had given up her childhood to be the responsible party in her family. It was easy to see now why she was so mature, so responsible. “Anyway, I should be getting home soon. Charlie is supposed to be home in a few hours and I need to make dinner. Plus, I have to dream up all manner of things for Emmett for his losses.”

“What exactly were you kids betting with,” I asked, folding my arms in mock disapproval.

“We were betting with dares,” she said casually. “Whoever won got to pick a dare for the loser.” I barked out a surprised laugh.

“What kind of dares?”

“Oh no. No I’m not going to spill to you because familial loyalty dictates that you have to side with Emmett and Jasper which means you would be obligated to warn them. Nope, can’t take that chance.” I grinned at her.

“What if I promised to ignore that loyalty and take your side,” I offered. Her eyes twinkled at me.

“Well then, my dear doctor, I’m afraid I couldn’t tell you because you might need plausible deniability.” I laughed again, overwhelmed by the fizzing in my blood.

“Planning something illegal, are we?”

“Never,” she said, eyes wide and face the picture of innocence but it was impossible to miss the mischief shining in her eyes.

“Try not to get the boys arrested. The paperwork is such a headache.” She giggled and I wanted nothing more than to wrap myself in the sound for eternity.

“I can try but they’re so troublesome,” she lamented. I chuckled.

“Well, may I give you a ride home so that you may commence with your evil plotting in peace?” I held my arm out and she hooked hers through it.

“ROSE, I’M LEAVING,” she shouted towards the stairs and there was the sound of stomping feet before Emmett appeared at the bottom of the stairs and rushed us.

“Bye, Bella! Thanks for coming over today, even if you’re a dirty cheat. Don’t worry though. I already have so many ideas for what I’m going to make you do.” He swung her into a hug, twirling her around.

“You’re crushing my spleen,” she complained.

“You don’t even know where your spleen is,” he said. He set her down and Rose gave her a hug.

“Text me when you want to hang out. I promise I don’t have to bring this big idiot with me next time.”

“Please, Bella loves me. She would be devastated if you left me out.”

“I don’t think that word means what you think it means,” Bella deadpanned.

“Alright, kids. I’m going to drive Bella home,” I said. “Please don’t destroy the house while I’m gone.”

“Whatever you say, dad,” Emmett teased. I led Bella out of the house, guiding her to my car. I opened the door for her and helped her climb in, placing her crutches in the back seat. I got in and pulled out of the garage and down the driveway.

“Your kids are pretty great,” she said quietly after a few minutes.

“I’m fairly fond of them, even when they’re testing my patience.”

“Emmett and Rose said that you and Edward are super close.” My heart stung with the reminder of Edward’s absence.

“We are. Edward has always been able to understand me, even when I don’t vocalize those feelings or thoughts. I’m feeling… off balance without him.”

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled.

“Whatever for?”

“He left because of me. I mean, I know that he’s got stuff going on but if I hadn’t run into him, he probably wouldn’t have ran for the hills.”

“Bella,” I said seriously, looking at her creamy skin growing pinker, “you have absolutely no reason to be sorry. Edward’s need for space has nothing to do with you running into him and everything to do with his need to work through his thoughts and feelings alone. Please do not blame yourself.”

“When is he coming back,” she asked and I felt the ugly green monster of jealousy rear its head at the idea that she cared about when Edward was returning. I quelled the desire to mark her as mine, to press my lips to hers and plunder her mouth.

“I don’t know,” I replied honestly. “Things are more serious than we realized. I don’t want him to come back before he’s ready but I do miss him.”

“I get that,” she breathed. I pulled up to her house and parked.

“Do you need help in,” I asked and she shrugged.

“I’m fine. Really. Not my first time on crutches.”

“I’ll see you to the door,” I said and hopped out of the car to grab the crutches and open her door. She thanked me quietly and we made our way up the walk to the front door. She moved her crutches to take another step but the foot of the crutch slid on the slick pavement and she was falling. I reached out and grabbed her before she could hit the ground. In doing so, she wrapped one arm around my neck and we stayed suspended for a moment, faces mere inches apart, my arms around her waist, her arm at my shoulder. I stared into her warm eyes and felt like I was being lit on fire by the desire shining in her eyes. I closed my eyes and forced a deep breath. I lifted her back up and let go despite my arms begging to continue feeling her soft curves.

“Are you okay,” I asked, voice slightly strangled.

“Yeah,” she said breathlessly. “Just clumsy.” I handed her crutch back to her and we finished the journey to her front door. She dipped and retrieved the key from under the mat and unlocked the door. She turned me after she’d opened it and stepped inside. “Thank you,” she mumbled, smiling shyly at me.

“Always a pleasure, Miss Swan,” I said with a small bow. She laughed and I smiled at her before turning around and getting into my car. I watched her in the mirror as I pulled away from the house until she went inside and shut the door. I pulled out my cell phone and hit number three on my speed dial.

“Alice,” I bit out when it went to voicemail, “I know what you’re up to. It’s not going to work, young lady. Get home. Now.”

Chapter 10: All I Know So Far

Chapter Text

I’m so happy you guys are enjoying this! Also welcome to the new Bellisle converts. It seems weird at first but I promise it WORKS! Now who's ready for a little Alice love?

The song for this chapter is All I Know So Far by P!nk.

Connect with me!
Twitter: teamdemonmonkey
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Disclaimer: I’m only doing this for a friend. I don’t get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don’t get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Ten: All I Know So Far
APOV

“So is your goal to piss Carlisle off until he admits defeat?” I didn’t turn around as Edward approached, moving across the snow calmly. I smirked to myself.

“If I thought that would work, maybe,” I replied cheerfully. “But you and I both know that until he agrees to change his mind, that won’t work.” He propped himself on a rock while I refocused on Seeing into the future. Images flew at me, faster than I could catch them all.

“I think you are overestimating my control,” he muttered.

“He loves her, Edward. I love her. Would you really hurt the woman who will complete him? Finally fulfill him? You’ve seen what she is to him, to our family. Don’t tell me that that doesn’t strengthen your resolve?” He stared at me, watching the visions through my mind. Most were of Bella and Carlisle, living their immortality together with the rest of us.

But there were a few of Bella, broken or old.

This only pushed my determination to change Carlisle’s mind. Bella belonged with us and Carlisle’s strange reluctance to make that happen was just a setback in my ultimate plan.

“Ultimate plan? What are you, a comic book villain,” Edward teased and I shoved him.

“I wouldn’t have to take such drastic measures if he wasn’t so pigheaded,” I complained. Edward barked out a laugh.

“Need I remind you, Alice, that you are speaking of the vampire who was too stubborn to drink human blood for months before he finally succumbed to his thirst. The man treats humans that are actively bleeding without a hint of temptation. Even if I take your side in all this and try to convince him to change his mind, you’re forgetting that society prohibits their relationship. Not to mention the treaty, which I hardly need to remind you, states that we aren’t allowed to bite a human. Then there is the matter of Bella’s feelings. What if she doesn’t want to be like us? Not that we’d be able to ask her because if she said no, we would have revealed our secret and put her life in danger.”

“What would you do if it were Esme,” I asked fiercely. “How far would you go for your soulmate?” He stayed silent but I knew that he finally understood. “It’s not just that she’s Carlisle’s soulmate, Edward. She’s exactly what our family is missing. There’s something special about her. She’ll be important to all of us.” I focused on one of the first visions I had about her. She was surrounded by all of us, arguing with Emmett, comforting Rose, having a lively discussion with Jasper, gardening with Esme, shopping with me and listening to Edward play the piano before she shoved his head into the keys with a laugh. It was one of a hundred different variations of this future that I had seen. “She’s going to be as dear to you as Carlisle is,” I pressed and he sighed.

“Her blood,” he began, “is the sweetest thing I’ve ever come across. It is the most fragrant, mouthwatering, delectable treat I have ever been privy to. I’m not like you, Alice: I’ve tasted human blood. I’ve given in to those cravings. I don’t know if I could be around her without… it’s like shoving a starving man into a room with all of his favorite foods laid out, ripe for the picking.” I didn’t need Jasper’s gift to feel his self-reproach as he stared into the glistening snow.

“You might be a lot of things, Edward. But you aren’t a cold blooded killer.” He barked out a humorless laugh.

“Am I not? I killed those men, Alice. I plotted their deaths, stalked them and then sucked the life out of them. I was judge, jury and executioner. That is the definition of a cold blooded killer.”

“You and I both know that the men you did that to were irredeemable. They were the lowest forms of life and you saved countless people from the cruelty and brutality they would have inflicted effortlessly.” He rolled his eyes at me. “But,” I said, grabbing his hand and forcing him to look at me, “you won’t hurt Bella.” He stared into my face and I tried to force the conviction to shine in every facet of my face and thoughts. “You will love her. She will be as important to you as Carlisle and the rest of us.”

“Your visions aren’t set in stone,” he whispered sadly.

“I’m not saying that because of my visions. I’m saying that because it’s only been a few days and I love her that much. Emmett and Rose have been with her one day and they have already accepted her.” He scoffed.

“Rosalie Hale accepted a human. I’ll believe that when I see it.”

“There’s something about Bella, Edward. Rose liked her from the beginning but she showed vulnerabilities to Bella that only Emmett and maybe Jasper have been privileged with. I don’t know if it’s a latent gift manifesting in her mortal life or she’s just incredibly disarming and approachable, but Bella has already rooted herself in the hearts of this family.” He looked away from me again, tracing patterns in the snow with his fingers. “I’m not saying it won’t be hard,” I said, wrapping my arms around his shoulders. “I have no doubt that being near her will require commitment and will undoubtedly be painful.” He snorted. “But isn’t it worth it for Carlisle? He’s been alone for so long, sacrificed so much of his own happiness for us. He doesn’t begrudge you and Esme but we both know that he had hopes for who she might be. Hopes that he would never voice. Now we’ve found her, the woman who will complete him. I need your help talking him out of these ridiculous ideas he has that she’ll be better off without him. Because she won’t be.”

“It will be hard to convince him,” he warned after a moment. “We don’t talk about Carlisle’s father often but the man inflicted his damage on him long enough that his beliefs are core values to Carlisle, even if he doesn’t recognize that’s where his morals stem from. He still ardently believes in the Christian ideals of heaven and hell and convincing him otherwise…” He trailed off but I knew what he was staying. Carlisle had changed Edward at the behest of his dying mother. Esme was supposed to be dead but he’d been reminded of the young woman who had visited his office years before. Rosalie had been so harshly brutalized. Emmett had been Rosalie’s second chance at a happy life in this eternity. But all of them had been dying.

Changing Bella would be asking him to take her human life for himself.

For us.

“What if Bella could make the decision?” He gave me a scathing glare.

“There’s no way to tell her all of the information without telling her our secret and should she choose not to join us, she would be a target until old age took her or one of the Volturi takes her life.”

“She would never choose to stay human. She loves Carlisle. She wants to be with him.”

“Yes but for eternity? Forever hiding our true natures? Attending school in an endless loop? I doubt she could even comprehend the concept.”

“You underestimate the connection she and Carlisle have. And there are positives to being with the one you love for eternity,” I reminded him pointedly. “What I need to know is if you will come back and help me.” He stood up and ran a hand through his hair.

“Of course I will,” he finally huffed out in a sigh. “Carlisle is my oldest and dearest friend. Without him, I wouldn’t have ever met Esme, wouldn’t be able to be with the love of my life. So yes, I will come and return the favor.” I squealed and jumped on him, squeezing him.

“Thank you! You won’t regret this! You are going to love Bella! I can’t wait for you to meet her! I can’t wait to find out what she thinks of Carlisle.” He pushed me off of him.

“I need a little more time before I come back,” he said firmly. “I want to make absolutely sure that I can be around her. For Carlisle.” I nodded enthusiastically.

“Take a week and then come back.” New visions assaulted me as his decision to come home changed and I tried to catch all of them, mostly seeing him and Bella together, talking and laughing. A vision of him and Carlisle embracing tightly slowed in my mind and I saw the ghost of a smile on his lips as he saw it through my thoughts. “At the very least, Carlisle will be glad to have you back.”

“Only until he realizes I’m there to wear him down and change his mind,” he teased and I laughed. Esme came flitting across the snow to us. Edward reached out a hand and pulled her into his arms.

“So we’re going back,” she said with a cheery smile.

“Eavesdropping is a most unbecoming habit, Esme Cullen,” Edward teased her, pressing his face to hers. She chuckled.

“Says the man who eavesdrops on people’s innermost thoughts.” He laughed fully and pressed a kiss to her temple. “Besides, it’s impossible to miss Alice when she gets her way,” she said with a wink directed at me. I beamed.

“Well, if everyone would just listen to me without question, I wouldn’t have to do things like this,” I said in exasperation. Edward rolled his eyes at me. “Anyway, now that I’ve secured my biggest ally, I can head back home. Before Carlisle runs up here to get me himself.” I hugged them tightly and headed back to Tanya’s to grab my bag and head for the airport. I pulled my phone from my pocket and dialed, pressing it to my ear.

“Let me guess; you talked him into it and we can expect a merry reunion,” Jasper drawled in my ear before I could say anything. I giggled.

“Did you expect anything less?”

“Never. I know better than to bet against you, darling. Does this mean you’re coming home?”

“I’m on my way as we speak.”

“Good. I’ve got a surprise for you when you get back,” he promised in a low voice. My belly tightened and I suddenly wondered if I needed my things or if I should just run home.

“Didn’t anyone ever tell you that you can’t surprise a psychic,” I teased breathlessly.

“Come home and find out.” I was assaulted with visions of him as he made different decisions about my return.

“You keep changing your mind and I won’t be fit to be on a public flight and then you won’t see me at all.” The visions stopped abruptly and I laughed.

“See you soon, darling. Be safe.”

Chapter 11: Everything At Once

Chapter Text

I'm sorry that updates have been a bit sporadic. Real like if working hard to drain me. Okay so it doesn't have to try that hard. I've been going to bed instead of staying up and writing. Promise that won't keep happening because we have fun things coming up!

The song for this chapter is Everything At Once by Lenka.

Connect with me!
Twitter: teamdemonmonkey
Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Eleven: Everything At Once

BPOV

Carlisle Cullen in scrubs should be illegal.

It’d been a week since he’d come home to us playing poker and I couldn’t get the image of him out of my head. His arms, thick with toned muscles, straining against his sleeves. I could see the definition of his chest straining against the scrub top and the pants hinted at the muscular thighs hidden beneath. The color had highlighted his pale skin, making his honey hair even more golden. His topaz eyes had sparkled and glowed.

I was hopelessly falling for him.

I’d been surprised that for the last week, none of the Cullens had come over. Alice had texted me everyday. She was still in Alaska but she wasn’t being very forthcoming about why. But she texted to check in on me and ask if I needed anything. I told her about my poker game and she was helping me come up with suitable dares for the boys. I missed her. I hadn’t realized that not seeing Alice would hit me quite so poignantly. The grief from losing my mom had subsided somewhat with the introduction of her father and family but without them there, I fell back into the depression that plagued me since before coming to Forks. I limited myself to watching home videos of her to a single day but for some reason, I missed her even more than before. I could guess why.

Carlisle.

If my mom had been alive I would have asked her about my growing feelings for my friends’ father. She would have probably encouraged me. Age had never been an obstacle in her mind. Phil was ten years younger than her. Although he walked out on us so maybe that wasn’t the best example. But I feel like she would have encouraged me to see where that was going. It was just another way she and my dad differed in their parenting approaches. Charlie would have an aneurysm if he knew what kind of thoughts and feelings I was having about the local hottie doctor in town.

Then he’d shoot Carlisle for good measure.

I set aside the book I’d been reading and sighed, too distracted to concentrate. I leaned out of the bed and dragged my backpack across the floor. I finally pulled out the missed work from my first week of suspension and dived in. It worked for about an hour and a half but I finished all too soon. In Phoenix I had been enrolled in mostly AP classes but Forks didn’t have an AP or advanced program. I flung myself back on the pillows and sighed deeply. My phone began to ring and I picked it up without looking at the ID.

“Hello,” I said, not bothering to hide the mind numbing boredom in my voice.

“Are you dying without me,” Alice asked through the phone and huffed out a laugh.

“My brain is going to shrivel up like a raisin. I can already feel it.” Her tinkling laugh echoed through the phone and I smiled at the sound.

“Well then come open your front door and I’ll fix that!” I sat up suddenly.

“You’re back? When?”

“I got in today. Came to see you first. Now, meet me downstairs!” I flung my feet off the bed and hurried down the stairs as fast as my crutches could carry me. As I reached the bottom, I spotted Alice tucking the key under the mat before coming in and closing the door. She pulled me into a tight hug and I dropped my crutches to hug her back.

“I missed you,” I exclaimed, eyes hot.

“I know. I’m sorry I just disappeared. But it had to be done.” She pulled back and helped me into the den. We both collapsed on the couch.

“Why did you need to go to Alaska,” I asked her suspiciously. She rolled her eyes good naturedly.

“I was just talking Edward into coming back.”

“Did you,” I asked, remembering how sad Carlisle was without his son.

“Yeah, I think so. He just needs a little more time.”

“And what are you recruiting him for,” I asked and she turned to me with a grin.

“So they told you. It’s an argument I’m having with Carlisle.” I scowled and she laughed. “Relax, Bella. It’s for his own good.”

“And as his daughter, I’m sure that completely falls in your prerogative.”

“Imagine if Charlie had the opportunity to do something that would make him beyond happy, like the happiest he’s ever been in his life. Wouldn’t you push him to do it?” My stomach twisted into knots.

“What do you want Carlisle to do? Did he get offered a better job?” I tried to keep the panic from my voice but by the way Alice rolled her eyes at me, it didn’t work.

“Relax. We’re not going anywhere. This is about Carlisle’s personal life.”

“Oh.” I stayed silent, not sure I wanted to draw attention to the strange obsession I had with her dad.

“I want him to give something a chance and he just won’t listen to me.”

“You can’t force your dad into things, Alice,” I chastised her and she shrugged.

“It’s the best thing for him. If he’d stop being so stubborn and just listen, I wouldn’t need Edward.”

“You act like Edward coming back will change everything,” I said skeptically.

“Oh it will. Edward can talk Carlisle into -and out of -anything.”

“For some reason, that doesn’t reassure me.” She rolled her eyes at me.

“Relax. Edward just knows exactly where Carlisle is coming from. And that is the exact advantage I need to get Carlisle to stop being a stubborn butt baby.”

“You know, Alice, I haven’t spent a ton of time with your dad, but ‘butt baby’ is certainly not a way I would describe him.”

“That’s only because he’s been on his best behavior around you. Bring up religion sometime. Then you’ll see what I mean.” I shook my head at her antics with an eye roll. “Anyway, enough about Alaska. Let’s talk dares. Have you decided what you’re doing yet?” I smiled gleefully.

“Oh yeah, I know what I’m going to do. I’m kind of worried about the two hands that I lost though. You know Emmett is going to come up with something beyond embarrassing.”

“True. But if you own it, you turn it around on him. The problem with Emmett is that he isn’t the least bit self-conscious. It’s almost impossible to embarrass him because he just makes everything a joke. So you either need to accept that he’s going to love whatever it is you dare him to do or… you need to figure out what gets under his skin.”

“You’re just a little bit evil, you know that,” I said and she laughed maniacally.

“Be happy I’m on your side. Speaking of my siblings, I need to get home and see Jasper.”

“I guess I’m just honored you came to see me before him,” I teased and she winked.

“I’ll text you later!” She danced out the door and I leaned back with a sigh.

Edward was coming home.

I wasn’t completely sure how I felt about that knowledge. On the one hand, I knew that Edward probably wasn’t a monster. Carlisle had admitted how much he missed his son and I trusted that Carlisle wouldn’t defend his son if he wasn’t a good person.

And yet…

My only interaction with Edward had been the unfortunate run in I had with him at school and honestly, the memory left me feeling a bit scared. His reaction to my running into him had been murderous to say the least. I was having a hard time believing that it was an isolated incident. People didn’t just react that way to an accident. Even if he’d had other things on his mind or had been struggling with more serious issues, it just felt like such an overreaction that it was hard to dismiss the fears and doubts from my mind.

I got up to make dinner and hopefully allow my mind a reprieve from the circles I was cycling through.

It didn’t work.

Cooking merely allowed my mind to wander more and reflect harder on my one meeting with Edward Cullen. I was so wrapped up in remembering the feral desperation in his face as he had strained for me that when Charlie came home, I didn’t even notice until he said something and I nearly jumped out of my skin.

“Whoa, take it easy there, Bells. I didn’t mean to scare you,” Charlie said with a concerned laugh.

“Sorry. I was thinking and didn’t hear you come in. How was work?” He placed his gun belt on a hook in the hallway while I started to dish us up.

“Not too bad. How was your day?”

“Pretty boring. Alice stopped by.”

“That was nice of her. What did you girls do?” He grabbed our plates and took them to the table, settling into his chair while I hobbled my way over.

“Just talked. She was just stopping by on her way home.”

“Oh yeah, you said she went to Alaska for some family stuff. How was it?”

“Okay, I guess. She didn’t have much to say about it other than her brother and aunt should be coming home soon. So I guess they got everything figured out.” I didn’t know why I was lying to Charlie. I certainly had no reason to protect Edward Cullen but I couldn’t shake this feeling that his family didn’t want everyone knowing their business.

“Good, good. How’s your foot?”

“Better, I think. I should probably make an appointment to get my stitches taken out.” He nodded and we ate in silence, both of us occupied by our own thoughts. He thanked me for dinner and took his plate to the sink before moving into the den and turning on a game. I finished eating at a slower pace and then stood up and rinsed my plates off. I had just finished placing the dirty dishes in the dishwasher when the doorbell rang.

“You expecting someone,” Charlie asked me on his way to the door. I shook my head at him. I heard the door open and the low hum of male voices before Charlie reappeared. “It’s for you, kid,” he said and stepped aside to reveal Carlisle Cullen, still in a suit from work with his black medical bag at his side. My heart fluttered at the sight of him and I noticed the corner of his mouth tip up, almost like he could hear it.

“Hello, Bella,” he said and it was only then that I realized my father was standing right by us, watching him.

“Hi Doctor Cullen,” I said quickly, aware I had been staring and desperately hoping Charlie hadn’t noticed.

“I know it’s terribly rude to just barge in like this but I realized it’s been a little over a week and I remembered that your stitches probably need to be removed.” He remembered? My face felt like it was being heated from the inside out by lava.

“Oh, um, thank you. I was going to try and make an appointment for this week but this works.” He smiled warmly at me and gestured to a chair. I hobbled over awkwardly and sat while he placed his bag on the table and began to remove various tools.

“How is work going for you, Charlie,” he asked while he prepped. Charlie pulled his chair up and sat in it.

“It’s been pretty quiet. Outside of that logging accident a week ago, it’s mostly just been the usual run of the mill things. How has the hospital been? Pretty slow, I imagine, if you’re making house calls.” Carlisle laughed at the joke and I imagined that the sound was the equivalent to drowning in chocolate.

“It’s been fairly routine. Alice mentioned that Bella was probably fed up with not walking and asked if I’d make a professional exception for her. I was happy to oblige. I know a week of not walking starts to test one’s patience.” He winked at me and my blush deepened. I hated that my body betrayed me so readily. He sat in a chair and pulled my foot into his lap. “You might feel some pressure,” he warned me. I just nodded, goosebumps exploding across my flesh at the feel of his hands on my skin.

“She’s a real special girl, your Alice,” Charlie said and I noticed his own blush. My eyes immediately met Carlisle’s and we both tried not to smile.

“Yes we are rather fond of her,” he said.

“Even when she’s being a bossy know-it-all,” I challenged him and he laughed.

“Even then.” He worked efficiently, pulling on the thread and then snipping it.

“How’s your sister doing? Bella mentioned some family stuff up in Alaska?”

“Yes, our cousin took a bit of a spill and Edward and Esme went up to help her get back on her feet again. Alice went up briefly to give Esme a bit of a rest before coming home.”

“I’m sure you’re excited to have them come home soon,” I said and he smiled warmly, still focused on my foot.

“I am. It will be nice to have everyone together again. In fact, you two should come for dinner once they get home.”

“Oh, we wouldn’t want to impose so soon after they’ve been away,” Charlie muttered gruffly and I could have kicked him for refusing.

“It’s really no trouble. Alice and Rosalie have been hounding me to be more sociable. I’m afraid that while I’m quite happy to see patients, I tend to be more of a homebody. I’m sure it hasn’t helped us integrate into the community very much.” I looked at Charlie and gave me a questioning look. I gave him a pleading look and he smiled.

“Well, that’s very nice of you. You just let us know when and what we can bring.”

“I will. And the good news is that you, Bella, no longer have to rely on crutches to get around,” he said with a winning smile and I looked down at my foot. There was still a slightly pink line from my injury but it no longer looked like something Doctor Frankenstein was using in his latest monster experiments.

“Thank you,” I said fervently and he chuckled.

“Still take it easy. No strenuous activity, no marathons.”

“I hope that doesn’t exclude Netflix,” I teased and he laughed.

“Netflix is definitely doctor approved.” He packed his belongings while Charlie stood and moved around the table, rubbing my shoulder as he passed.

“We really appreciate it, Carlisle. Bella’s been cursing those crutches all week.”

“It was really no trouble. I’m just happy to help. You two have a wonderful evening. I’ll have Esme and Alice work out the details for dinner and get in touch.” He gave me a final smile in farewell before heading to the door, Charlie following behind. I heard them say their goodbyes before the door closed and Charlie came back in and leaned on the door frame.

“That was nice of him,” he commented and I stood up, reveling in my newly gained freedom.

“He seems really nice,” I mumbled and Charlie chuckled.

“Really easy on the eyes too,” he teased and I blushed.

“Dad! He’s Alice’s father,” I said emphatically but he just laughed harder.

“He is. I’m just teasing, Bells. Plenty of ladies in this town have become smitten by that man’s smile. Don’t be embarrassed if you have too.” I blushed deeper and he just laughed to himself as he made his way back into the den to watch the game. I leaned against the sink for a minute, smiling to myself as I replayed the visit in my head. Then I quickly made my way upstairs and collapsed on my bed. My phone buzzed with a new message and I opened it.

I can’t wait for dinner! Would it be weird if I made it themed? I’m thinking of a 20's Gatsby vibe.

I laughed at Alice’s antics and shot off a reply before getting up and ready for bed. As I drifted off, I imagined Carlisle in a dapper suit while I was dolled up in a flapper dress, smiling at each other while he held me in his arms and guided me in the steps of a dance.

Chapter 12: Coincidance

Chapter Text

I'm trying to get these turned out, I promise! But I appreciate ALL the things you guys have had to say about my little story. Your reviews are giving me life right now. Also, I apologize in advance if I couldn't make what is about to happen translate well in text. I blame Emmett. He was insistent.

The song for this chapter is Coincidance by Handsome Dancer.

Connect with me!
Twitter: teamdemonmonkey
Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Twelve: Coincidance

BPOV

The last week of my suspension passed pretty uneventfully. Alice picked up my makeup work for me and we spent a couple of hours together working on our missed assignments. I was practically itching to return to school but I was also wary of what gossip would follow me when I returned. The sheer amount of unfounded gossip that followed me the first few days of school before I was dismissed for two weeks was exhausting: I could imagine what kind of stories were floating around since then. I wondered what Jessica had told people. I did regret hitting her.

Sort of.

It was a bitchy thing to say.

I couldn’t decide if she was just so infatuated with Edward Cullen and the rest of the family that she honestly couldn’t see how inappropriate her fascination with them was, or if she was just jealous that despite what, I assume, were some valiant efforts on her part, they hadn’t given her the time of day. They didn’t seem to really spend time talking to anyone in the school outside of their family.

Except for me.

Why was that? What was so special about me?

I wasn’t going to complain. I loved having Alice and Rosalie in my corner. Emmett and Jasper were there too, although our relationship was a bit more competitive and full of fun. Still, I knew intrinsically that if I needed something, they would be there for me. And Carlisle…

Carlisle.

I didn’t really have any room to criticize Jessica for her infatuation when I was lusting after the head of the Cullen family.

Not just lusting after, although the man had a body made for sin.

I missed him. Whenever he wasn’t there -which was often -I found myself thinking about him, a hollow loneliness consuming me from the inside out. It felt ridiculous considering that our encounters had been too few for my liking. Certainly too few to be having such strong feelings for him. Not to mention the fact that he was my best friends’ dad. I had started having vivid dreams of him, not just the PG-13 kind. I dreamed about spending my nights curled into his side while he read to me, his voice eliciting such a feeling of absolute security and contentment, it almost scared me. The dreams were so real that more often than not, I startled myself awake, dripping in sweat and breathing so heavily, it felt like I’d run a marathon. I could barely look Alice in the eye after those particular encounters.

Sometimes I wondered if she suspected how I felt because whenever I mentioned him, she’d beam. I remembered Emmett calling me out during our poker game for flirting with his dad but I couldn’t be bothered to be too ashamed of our back and forth. I felt inexplicably drawn to him and I certainly did not want to stop the pull happening between us.

But I knew that this only had the potential for heartbreak.

He was older than me.

It was illegal for him to pursue me.

His children were my best friends.

His one son might have wanted to kill me.

My father would never approve of having a relationship with him.

The list was endless and I found myself crying into my pillow more than once when I really considered it.

~~~~~STY~~~~~~

I woke up early on the day I was set to return to school. Charlie and I had been forced to have a meeting with Principal Greene prior to returning. He reminded me about the conduct policies at the school and suggested that should I encounter issues of a similar nature, to come to him or a teacher. I barely contained my eye roll at that suggestion. I wasn’t going to just run to a staff member whenever I had issues. I would keep my hands to myself though. I couldn’t handle another suspension.

I loved the familiar routine of getting ready for school and found myself ready to go long before the school would be open. I tried to pass the extra time by reading but I kept glancing at the clock and finally decided to drive to the school and read in my truck until it was time to go to class. I grabbed my backpack and jacket and headed out, locking the door behind me. Before I could get to my truck, I stopped at the sight of Emmett’s red Jeep in front of the house. I walked slowly down the walk and Rose hopped out and waved at me.

“What’s going on,” I called out. She shrugged.

“We just wanted to drive you on your first day back.”

“Yeah, we obviously have to keep an eye on you, Swan. Wouldn’t want you running Jessica Stanley down in the parking lot in a fit of pique,” Emmett teased, leaning out the driver side window. I flipped him off and came around to Rosalie’s side.

“You really don’t have to,” I told her lamely. “I was going to drive over and read in the truck until school starts.”

“Get in the Jeep, Bella,” she said, her no nonsense manner eliciting a smile from me. I followed her orders and climbed into the high Jeep, tossing my backpack on the seat next to me and pulling on the harness awkwardly.

“So, Bella, are you excited to go back to school,” Emmett asked.

“Immensely.”

“Nerd,” he mocked and I smiled at him.

“It just means I’ll be able to have the chance for intelligent conversation. You know, that thing that smart people do. I’m sure you’ve seen it before.” He laughed merrily and I felt the lead knot that had formed in my stomach overnight begin to loosen and disintegrate. It was hard to worry about anything when Emmett was making an effort to put you at ease.

“Want to sit with us at lunch,” Rosalie offered.

“That would be great. Do you want me to meet you or just find you after I get my food?”

“We always sit in the same spot. It’s the table by the doors to the courtyard. You can’t miss it. I’m sure Emmett will make sure of that.” He winked at her and she sighed happily. I felt that hollow loneliness filling my chest where my heart was and looked away quickly.

“Make sure you’re on time,” Emmett said and I narrowed my eyes at him.

“What are you planning, Emmett?” He gave me a look of sincere innocence.

“I’m not planning anything,” he said with mock offense and I raised an eyebrow at him skeptically.

“I don’t buy it. And don’t bother trying to look all innocent. It doesn’t fit your face.” He shook his head at me and Rosalie broke in to ask me about a series we’d been long distance binging on Netflix. We began to share theories and character assessments with each other, which mostly involved her tearing down the characters while I defended them. I didn’t notice when we pulled into the school and it wasn’t until Alice opened the door unceremoniously and complained that we were going to be late that I realized that we only had a few minutes until the bell was going to ring. I climbed out of the truck and she hugged me and wished me luck and then I was on my way to class, unsure of what gossip awaited me.

~~~~STY~~~~

By the time I got to third period where I knew I’d have to sit by Jessica again, I could feel a headache pulsing behind my eye ominously. I half considered begging off to the nurse’s office and then going to the hospital so Carlisle could look me over. But that was cowardly and I highly doubted that Carlilsle had time for something as trivial as wanting to avoid the girl I assaulted two weeks ago.

He’d probably understand actually.

But I forced myself to enter the classroom and sit down in my usual spot amid the whispers and stares. Unsurprisingly, our fight had been greatly exaggerated until I was regaled with a retelling that involved me roundhouse kicking Jessica in her face while she cowered on the ground begging me not to hurt her. I’d been pestered with questions about our argument, the Cullens, my mom and if I had been in a delinquent school in Phoenix or done time in juvie.

Jessica came in right before the bell rang and sat down across the aisle from me. I avoided looking at her as we both began to pull our books and things from our bags. I did sneak a glance at her and noticed that her eye was mostly clear, although if that was because it had healed or because she had used makeup to hide it, I didn’t know. Mr Varner started the lesson and we sat in a tense silence while other members of the class kept shooting me furtive looks over their shoulders. I kept my head down and focused on my assignment. But at the end of class, Jessica surprised me by grabbing my sleeve before I could escape. She looked awkwardly at her shoes.

“Hey, I, um, just wanted to say that I’m sorry about what I said about your mom,” she mumbled and I swallowed down the ‘it’s okay’ that automatically wanted to come out to excuse me from this awkward situation. I noticed that people were watching us and I raised my eyebrows at them. They hurried away from us, throwing looks back at us as though waiting for us to start rolling on the ground, pulling each other’s hair.

“Thank you. I’m sorry for hitting you. How’s your eye?”

“It’s getting better. Most of the bruising has gone away.”

“Good.” We stood silently before we both shrugged towards the door and it was only then that I remembered that we had the next period together too. I began to walk toward Spanish with her trailing behind me. I passed Emmett in the hall and he winked at me with a wide smile and I rolled my eyes at him but I felt a little better after seeing him.

Spanish was less tense than math had been but people still stared and whispered between instructions. Jessica and I found ourselves paired off by Mrs. Goff to practice. We spoke to each other in short, stilted sentences while the rest of class seemed to be on the edge of their seats waiting for a hint of drama to spread around like a communicable disease. By the time the bell rang, my nerves felt frayed and all I wanted was to sneak home, swallow some tylenol and hide under my covers. Instead, I hiked my backpack onto my shoulder and made my way to the cafeteria, keeping an eye peeled for the Cullens and Hales. I grabbed random food from the lunchline and made a beeline for the table that I could see Alice and Jasper sitting at. I collapsed unceremoniously next to them and put my head on my arm on the table.

“Bad day,” Jasper asked sympathetically. I didn’t even raise my head, just nodded. “Don’t stress it, Bella. People around here make up the most ridiculous stories because nothing ever happens here. If I had a nickel for everytime I heard a crazy story about someone in this family, I’d be able to bring in the entertainment these kids so obviously need.” I raised my head slightly to look at him.

“How long does it take for them to stop talking about you?”

“Well, to be fair, they never really stop talking about us but usually gossip dies down within a day or two. Unless something distracts them.” I groaned and laid my head back down. I heard someone sit in the chair next to me and judging by the scraping of the legs against the floor, I guessed it had to be Emmett. My suspicions were confirmed when I heard his voice near my ear a moment later.

“Looks like you need some cheering up, Swan.” I swatted my hand at him awkwardly and he laughed. “I think now is the perfect time for a dare.” I shot up and glared at him.

“No way. Today has royally sucked; I am not doing a dare.”

“Ah-ah,” he chided. “There are no rules about exemptions. So I’m choosing to use one of mine now. Bella Swan, I dare you…” I waited tensely for his choice and he grinned in anticipation. “I dare you to do the Coincidance.”

“No no no no no no no no no. Emmett I cannot dance.” He shook his head at me.

“Sorry, Swan, there’s no getting out of it. I happen to have a stereo here,” he said gleefully, lifting an old boombox onto the table, “and I insist that you dance.”

“I hate you,” I told him flatly and he laughed.

“Awh, don’t get so sour, Swan. I’m going to do it with you!”

“Why on Earth would you do that?”

“So that everyone can see what a supremely talented dancer I am. Duh.” I snorted and began to smile and his smile grew. “You ready to have your world rocked?”

“The only reason my world would be rocked is because you are a freaking giant and dancing might actually cause the school to fall down around us.” He laughed heartily and I shook my head, heart pounding. “Alright, you ass, let’s get this over with.” We both stood and I followed him to an open area in front of the table. He pointed over his shoulder and Rosalie hit a button on the boombox. I pouted at her but she shrugged.

The beat began and Emmett began to move his shoulders in time with it. He looked at me expectantly as he danced and I rolled my eyes and began to copy him. I noticed the din of chattering voices began to die down until I only heard the music and I could feel my classmates staring at us. The music swelled as the fourth verse started and I watched as Emmett made some ridiculous dance moves and then waited for me. I laughed and put my hands on my knees, moving my body back and forth with the drums. He cheered and we both began to dance harder. I noticed others getting up and performing their own ridiculous dance moves, catcalling their friends and laughing with us. Emmett grabbed my hands and swung me up onto his shoulders with disturbing ease. I yelped and grabbed onto his head as he began to dance around the cafeteria, laughing as we went. I felt myself giving in to his ridiculous showmanship and finally we stopped back at the table and he pulled me down and spun me into a twirl that I normally would have tripped over myself to perform but he held me upright. The music ended as I did and there was a moment of silence before cheers erupted through the cafeteria. I blushed as I could hear people calling my name but did a small mocking curtsy before pointing to Emmett who threw his hands in the air and walked around like the heavyweight champion he looked like. I sat back in my seat and Alice, Jasper and Rosalie immediately showered me with compliments.

“That was epic,” Emmett said, sitting next to me and I reached over and punched his arm playfully before pulling back and shaking my fist.

“Damn, Emmett, are you taking steroids or something?” He preened and flexed for me.

“All natural, baby.” I rolled my eyes and flipped him the bird but he laughed good naturedly and I realized that things finally felt somewhat normal, despite the performance I had just given. I laughed as Jasper made an offhand slight about Emmett’s dancing and they began to bicker playfully.

These friends felt like family.

But I was afraid I was going to lose them.

Or worse, that they’d reject me.

Jasper ended his argument and looked over at me worriedly.

“Bella, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just a headache. I’m, um, gonna go to class. I’ll see you guys later.” I stood up quickly to Rosalie and Jasper’s protests and made my way through the cafeteria, dodging compliments and gossip and moving to my locker, shoving books inside and then sticking my head in and taking a few deep breaths.

I loved Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper. And Alice; especially Alice. But I knew that given half a chance, I could easily love Carlisle just as much and knowing that if they found out about that, they would push me away faster than I could say, ‘Who’s your new mommy?’ made my heart ache. I needed to get over this infatuation I had with Carlisle Cullen because his and Esme’s children had wrestled their way into my heart and settled in there. And I couldn’t lose them for a relationship that was doomed before it started.

The thought had my eyes misting but I blinked the tears away and took a bracing breath before grabbing my Biology book and shoving it in my backpack. The halls had filled up but kids were starting to hurry to their next class and I joined the throng and moved purposefully to Biology. I walked in and moved to sit down before stopping dead and staring at my table.

Edward Cullen was sitting at my table, an easy smile on his face and acting like our one encounter before this, he hadn’t looked like he was trying to rip my throat out.

Chapter 13: Maybe You're Not The Worst Thing Ever

Chapter Text

Well, I hope you guys are ready for Edward because it is about to go down, folks! Thank you so much for the lovely reviews! I am so excited to see how you guys react to what is coming.

The song for this chapter is Maybe You're Not The Worst Thing Ever by Cast of Galavant . Give it a listen. Have a laugh.

Connect with me!
Twitter: teamdemonmonkey
Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Thirteen: Maybe You're Not The Worst Thing Ever

BPOV

The bell rang and jarred me from my frozen staring contest with Edward. I moved down the aisle between lab tables. I tripped slightly over a backpack left too far in the walkway and stumbled, catching myself on our table. I looked up at him and saw him trying to conceal a smile and possibly a laugh. I glared at him as I set my backpack down and sat carefully in my seat. I noticed that as I pulled my chair up to the table, he moved his as far away from me as possible while still staying at the table. My eyes narrowed at him. Mr Banner started his lesson and I pulled out my book and a notebook and pen, pointedly ignoring the boy sitting next to me. About halfway through class, Mr Banner turned us loose to work on our assignment.

“I didn’t get a chance to introduce myself the last time we met,” I heard him say to me after a few minutes.

“Yeah, funny how doing an impression of a rabid, psychotic, serial killer gets in the way of a pesky thing like manners,” I deadpanned. His face split into a grin.

“Alice was right about you; you’re quick.”

“And you and Emmett are obviously related because you find the ability to think so impressive.” He laughed and I noticed that his voice was rich and velvety.

Like Carlisle’s.

But not as nice. Carlisle’s voice was like melted butter sliding over rolls straight from the oven.

They all were ridiculously attractive. Edward was just as attractive as his adopted father. He had messy bronze hair and looked like a machine of lean muscle and sass. Like the rest of his family, he had pale skin and golden eyes. I paused, refocusing my attention on him.

The last time I’d seen him, his eyes were coal black.

Maybe I was just remembering wrong.

Except that encounter was burned into my brain. His eyes had been black.

“You’re quite the little spitfire, Isabella Swan,” he said but I noticed that his brows were slightly puckered as though he was perplexed or frustrated.

“Only with people who test my patience,” I said cheerily.

“Well look at that. I’ve only been back in town for less than a day and already I’m passing tests.”

"Clearly you haven't seen Rose yet or I guarantee you wouldn't be saying that." He shrugged.

“I got in late last night. She was already in bed. If Rosalie doesn’t go to bed early, her face will fall off and the world will end.” I rolled my eyes at him. “On a more serious note, I apologize profusely for our last meeting. I’m sure I seemed… crazed. I won’t make excuses for my behavior. I regret it deeply and merely ask for your forgiveness.” I stared at him, stunned. His no bullsh*t apology surprised me and also raised my estimation of him a few points.

“No harm, no foul,” I said finally. “Can’t live life with regrets.”

“You don’t have regrets,” he asked curiously.

“I regret a lot of things. This conversation tops the list,” I said flatly and he chuckled and mumbled something that sounded like ‘he’s in for it’ but I wasn’t sure. “So, if it’s not too personal, what did your ex-girlfriend do that pushed you so far over the edge?” He shrugged, eyes focused on the edge of the table he was rubbing his finger over.

“Nothing too original. The usual case of a boy being more invested than the girl he’s infatuated with. I just have a hard time letting things go. I’m bitter and complicated. It’s one of my many charms.”

“I don’t think you know what that word means. Or how to count,” I pointed out. I got the feeling he didn’t really want to talk about it, at least with me. He laughed and winked at me.

“You just wait: you’re going to love me.”

“The way that people like trashy Lifetime movies or…?” He laughed again and shook his head.

“Well, you already like the rest of my family. So you have no choice but to like me too. It’s inevitable.” My smile faded and I turned back to my work.

I did like his family.

I definitely liked his father more than I should.

“What’s wrong,” he asked, frowning at me and I shrugged.

“Nothing. I just need to finish this assignment. I’m already drowning in make-up work,” I lied and his eyes narrowed at me.

“Yeah, Alice mentioned your suspension.” I waited for him to thank me the way the rest of his family had, already dreading it and preparing a rebuff. “Jessica has been after me since we moved here. I didn’t realize that her fixation would make her so jealous and suspicious. I’m sorry she insulted you.” I blushed and felt a little piece of my aching heart ease. I turned to tell him he didn’t have to apologize but my words died on my tongue. He was gripping the table edge with both hands and his eyes had darkened. I opened my mouth to say something but the bell rang and he was up and out of his seat before it had even finished. He left the room quickly and I was left staring after him and feeling completely off balance by his sudden shift in moods. I gathered my things slowly and shoved them in my bag, blinking furiously to stop the irrational tears from escaping my eyes.

I moved mechanically through gym, mostly avoiding any kind of physical activity and my classmates.

Did I look like the girl Edward had liked? Maybe that was why he seemed to reserve such out of character animosity for me.

But I thought that we had been getting along. I appreciated the fact that he didn’t thank me for fighting with Jessica about his family. It was awkward when Carlisle and Alice had done it. What do you even say to someone who thanks you for being a decent human being? Were the people in this town really so rude and judgmental that not participating in the gossip was such a huge deal? The thought made me sad. Charlie loved this town and I didn’t want to be the daughter that hated living with him for the next few years and then escaped to college and didn’t ever come back to visit just to avoid the tiny town that he lived in.

Gym eventually ended and I changed out of my gym clothes and made my way out of the school to my truck. It wasn’t until I was in the parking lot that I remembered that Emmett and Rose had driven me to school today. My heart fell and I felt panic setting in when I scanned the parking lot and didn’t see Emmett’s huge red Jeep. A silver Volvo pulled up to the curb and the driver window rolled down. Edward Cullen leaned out.

“Can I give you a ride home,” he asked. I started to reject his offer before I felt arms close around my shoulders from behind.

“Hey Bella,” Alice chirped before releasing me. “Emmett and Rose had to leave. She had an appointment to get to. But they asked us to get you home. Come on!” She climbed into the back of the silver car, Jasper sliding in beside her. I cringed internally before walking around the front of the car and climbing into the passenger seat, only just noticing how many people were watching us.

Great, more gossip.

I buckled my seatbelt as Edward pulled out of the parking lot and headed toward my house. I would have been suspicious that he knew where it was but this town was so small, everyone knew where the chief lived. Alice was chattering happily in the backseat about the dinner she was planning for us now that Edward and Esme were back from Alaska.

“I’m sorry, Bella,” Edward finally said quietly. I turned to look at him, feeling both confused and perturbed.

“Are you clinically insane or just incredibly annoying?”

“I don’t know, probably both,” he said with a nonchalant shrug.

“Do I look like her or something?” He looked over at me but I didn’t flinch away from him.

“No,” he said after a moment. “I… I have a problem. I’m trying to move away from that and focus on the future and not give in but…”

“Drugs,” I asked quietly. He looked over at me again and I began to worry about him crashing the car.

“Not exactly. Let’s just say that there is something that I am craving but I can’t have it. I don’t actually want it because I know it would ruin everything. But it’s hard not to have it.” I mulled over his words as we drove. I believed him. Hell, I could hardly throw stones when I watched home videos of my mom over and over because it was less painful than admitting I would never see her again in this life. I cried whenever I saw her in them but there was something numbing about it all because for the length of the video, I just pretended that nothing had changed.

That she was still here.

“Okay,” I said quietly, throat tight. I noticed that he had pulled up to my house and I gathered my things, avoiding his gaze as it rested on me. I noticed that the backseat was quiet and wondered if Alice and Jasper had been following our conversation the whole time. “Thanks for the ride. I’ll see you guys tomorrow.” I opened the door and hurried through the rain to the front porch, unlocking it with shaky hands and letting myself in with a quick wave at the car. I closed the door and leaned against it, sliding to the floor and finally giving in to all the emotions that had been churning inside me. Sobs wrenched from my throat as I felt wave after wave of grief crashing over me like the tides of the ocean.

I cried over my mom.

I cried because I missed Phoenix.

I cried over the awkward situation that Charlie and I now found ourselves in.

I cried because I couldn’t keep up with Edward Cullen’s mood swings.

I cried because I knew deep in my heart that I was falling in love with Carlisle Cullen and that that love was destined to fail before it could start. Either because he would never feel that way about me or because the people we loved would never allow it.

And I cried because I felt like I was going to lose Carlisle before I even had him.

Chapter 14: You Say

Chapter Text

Okay so that was exciting. This chapter ended up being a wee bit heavier than I planned. Apparently, Edward had a lot to get off his chest. But we love him because he just wants Bella and Carlisle to smoochy kiss and have true love! Sorry. Can you tell I've been watching a lot of Bluey of late?

The song for this chapter is You Say by Lauren Daigle. I used the Piano Guys cover.

Connect with me!
Twitter: teamdemonmonkey
Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Fourteen: You Say

CPOV

When I pulled up to the house after work, I could hear the melodic sounds of an expertly played piano in the house. I smiled, relieved and elated to have Edward and Esme back with us. I climbed out of my car and hurried into the house, sitting on the piano bench next to Edward as he played.

“I’ve missed your music,” I told him quietly and he smirked. “Tell me how your first day back was. How was it being so close to Bella? Did you apologize for scaring her?” He was unperturbed by the rapid fire of questions, even smiling when I asked about his apology.

“I did meet her. And I did apologize. Being so close to her was… nearly unbearable. What burning alive must feel like, I imagine.”

“If it’s that painful to resist her, we shouldn’t be forcing you to be near her,” I chastised as I worried not only about his comfort but also her safety.

“I said nearly unbearable, Carlisle. Give me a little credit. Knowing who she is to our family… to you… it grounds me. She blushed while we were talking and I hadn’t been expecting that. But I imagined what would happen to you if I lost control and it saved me long enough to leave and clear my head.” I remembered how deliciously beautiful she was when she blushed, her blood rising to the surface of her cheeks and warming them, pulsing. “Gee thanks, that helps so much,” Edward said sarcastically, drawing me from my thoughts.

Sorry, that was cruel of me, I thought contritely. He shrugged.

“It’s something I will have to learn to overcome. I’ll just have to try not to embarrass her too much.”

I’m afraid that might not be enough. Bella is quite prone to blushing. He smirked at me and waggled his eyebrows.

“That’s probably because you’re around, old man,” he teased and I rolled my eyes at him.

Did her thoughts give you that impression, I asked him, unable to hide the hopefulness that colored my thoughts at the idea that she might have been thinking about me when I wasn’t there. His smirk fell away instantly and he glared at the piano. What is it? Did her thoughts upset you?

“That’s the thing, Carlisle. I didn’t hear any thoughts from her.” I immediately stilled.

Nothing at all?

“Nothing. At first, I thought that perhaps she merely spoke her thoughts as she had them. But clearly that isn’t the case. She’s not shallow and empty-headed. And it became obvious that she considers things carefully. I was teasing her about the likelihood of our becoming friends and it’s like the joy was sucked out of her. She went quiet and somber. When I asked her about it, she straight up lied to me.”

Is it possible that Alice is wrong and that she isn’t as fond of us as we thought?

“No. Alice’s visions are clear. And I asked Jasper about Bella’s feelings, especially around us, and he said that she already loves all of us. Well maybe not me. But she loves my siblings and she definitely loves you.” I immediately warmed at the thought, my chest filling with corresponding adoration until I imagined that if Edward touched me, I’d feel positively human. His playing slowed, growing melancholy. “Carlisle, you clearly love her as much as she loves you. Maybe even more. So why do you insist on hurting not only yourself, but her as well by denying the both of you the love that you so clearly deserve?”

I won’t steal her life and freedoms from her, Edward. I saved you at your dying mother’s behest. I knew Esme. Rosalie had been brutalized and there isn’t a day that goes by that I’m not reminded that immortality is not the choice she would have made. That’s why I changed Emmett, to atone for making that choice for her. Bella is young, incredibly so. She has her whole life ahead of her; options, opportunities, the potential for a long and happy life. Changing her, stealing that future from her for nothing more than my own selfish motivations would be cruel, criminally so. Not to mention the fact that should her immortality ever end, I would have doomed her to purgatory. He stopped playing and spun to face me, lifting his leg over the bench to straddle it.

“That is the biggest load of bullsh*t I have ever heard cross your lips, Carlisle Cullen,” he said angrily and my eyebrows shot up at the use of such coarse language with me. “Oh, don’t be so pious. You seem to forget that I have been with you the longest, that I know your innermost thoughts and feelings, even the ones you refuse to give voice to. I know what you were hoping Esme would be and I know that when I came home after you changed her and it became clear what we were to each other, it broke you.” I opened my mouth to argue but he held up a finger warningly. “You would never admit it and you would certainly never begrudge me the happiness that you so desperately wanted to experience yourself but we both know you thought it, even when you tried not to. Esme and I have agonized over the pain we caused you especially as the years have passed and you’ve been without love. We hoped that maybe you changed Rosalie… Well, obviously you didn’t and that isn’t what she means to you. But do you really think that any of us, even Rosalie, resent you for this life and family that you have built for us?”

She has regrets. Resentments.

“Yes, she does, to an extent. But if you hadn’t changed her, she would have never found Emmett. That certainly outweighs the things she feels were taken from her. And while you might not realize this, because you can’t read her mind, a lot of her anger stems from the unresolved trauma that that cretin of a fiancé inflicted on her. Revenge or no, it doesn’t change the fact that he betrayed her monstrously and murdering him didn’t bring her the satisfaction or peace that she hoped it would.”

“I don’t think that any of that was yours to share,” I quietly scolded him but he just shrugged it off.

“Rosalie loves Bella,” he continued. “It’s more than just that she finds her amusing or peculiar or even that we all know who she is supposed to be to you. She genuinely cares for her. After hearing the thoughts of this family after meeting and spending time with her, I can tell you that every single one of them would do whatever it takes to protect her and make her happy. It feels almost supernatural. If your gift in this immortal life is compassion, she is perfectly matched to you. We all want so desperately for you to be happy, Carlisle. Not the unfulfilled happiness you have convinced yourself is all you deserve, where you try to find enough satisfaction in your work to compensate for the emptiness you feel when you come home to a house full of mated vampires: real happiness. Fulfillment that comes from having your other half to fill every crevasse in your heart and soul. Bella is that person for you and you belittle her importance when you pretend that your feelings, and hers by association, are insignificant enough to walk away from. Did you ever think that by denying yourself, you are also denying her the happiness she is entitled to?” I felt guilt bloom at his suggestion, my mind and body instantly rebelling at the thought of Bella suffering at all. “We don’t have any control over who we fall in love with,” he whispered. “If we did, you know I wouldn’t have stolen Esme away from you.” I recoiled from him as if he’d slapped me before placing my hands on his shoulders as he stared dejectedly at the piano bench.

“You didn’t steal her from me. She was always yours to begin with,” I reassured him. He looked up at me and the angst and guilt shining in his eyes nearly undid me.

“You had your hopes, Carlisle. I dashed those completely when I returned and what’s worse is that you were forced to be near us afterwards and you forced your feelings aside and encouraged us. And then we made it even worse when I tried to quit this life you so selflessly gave to me and Esme came with me. You were alone, Carlisle! For four years! I did things during that time that I will always regret. The first human life that I took was Esme’s abusive husband. I didn’t even tell her until after I’d done it! But there is nothing that eats me alive more than knowing that after you had spent centuries without a family, we just left you high and dry. I’m still not convinced that you didn’t change Rosalie because you were afraid we’d leave you again!” I was completely taken aback by his confession. I’d never known that he had killed Esme’s husband, Charles. It broke me to know that even with his ability to know what I was thinking in the most private recesses of my mind, I hadn’t convinced him how much I didn’t resent him and Esme’s brief period away from me.

Of course it had been debilitating when he and Esme left. Edward was my son, my first real companion in this life and this peculiar lifestyle. Esme was a partner, a sister but also a real friend, as close to me as Edward was. When he’d announced that he didn’t want this life -my life -and Esme couldn’t bear to be separated from him, I’d been crushed. Feeling abandoned and betrayed, I’d turned to medicine to try and fill the void their absence left. Unsurprisingly, it hadn’t worked. There were too many hours in the day, especially when one couldn’t sleep, to avoid the constant knowledge that I wasn’t enough, this life wasn’t enough for my family. Normally, our kind felt the passing of time fairly quickly. Four years was nearly the blink of an eye to someone who had been around for centuries but not this time. I felt every passing day acutely.

When they’d returned, I had done my best to hide how deep the hurt went. I’d put the past behind me and only expressed my love and concern for them. Edward’s transition from murdering humans to returning to our alternative diet had been fraught with emotion and struggle. He knew what he was missing when he fed on animals now. But he’d persisted, driven by the desire to retain his humanity. He hadn’t had an accident since then. Until Bella, he hadn’t even really been tempted by the humans he was surrounded by on a daily basis. I had vowed on his return to hide the pain and ruin he’d left behind. But I realized now that I hadn’t been nearly as secretive as I’d thought. He’d never called me out on it until now but in doing so, he revealed that had spent the last eight decades being eaten up by guilt.

“Edward,” I managed to choke out, “I have never blamed you for leaving or taking Esme. The highest freedom I could afford you in this life is the ability to make your own choices.”

“But that doesn’t change the fact that the choice I made caused you irreparable pain,” he murmured.

“Not irreparable. Did it hurt when you left? Yes. I missed you and Esme so very much. But the only part of that experience that is important is that you both came back. That is all I care about. You had your choices after you left me and even though you took a few years to make them, you still chose to return to this family. Just like Alice and Jasper coming to us. It doesn’t matter what Jasper did before he came, only that they joined our family.” He bit his lip and I sighed and gently gripped the side of his head, forcing him to make eye contact with me. “You shouldn’t feel even the slightest hint of guilt, my son. And you certainly shouldn’t get drawn into Alice’s battles because you feel that you owe me or you must atone for an imaginary slight.” He stared into my face and I watched as his face morphed from contrite and tortured to resolved and stubborn.

“No. I’m not doing this because Alice pestered me into or because I think that I owe you for what happened all those years ago. I am doing this because I love you, Carlisle. I refuse to allow you to give up your happy eternity with Bella simply because you have your own demons and hang-ups that make you believe that somehow you don’t deserve to have her. I’m certainly not going to let you lose her because your father convinced you that anything but a perfect human being is doomed to an afterlife of torment and punishment. You are selfless and compassionate and if anyone has earned the divine right to peace in their afterlife, it’s you. How do you know that God didn’t make Bella specifically for you?” I turned away from him, my throat tight with emotion at the high praise he had bestowed on me.

God doesn’t reward the abominations of the earth, I thought sadly and he sighed.

“One day, Carlisle Cullen, you will see yourself the way you are instead of the damned monster you believe yourself to be. Hell, maybe Bella will be the one to finally convince you of your worth. But I swear on my mother’s grave that I will do everything in my power to bring you the happiness you deserve,” he vowed lowly before turning and beginning to play the piano again, slow and full of sorrow and wistfulness. I watched him, stunned.

“Not to guilt you or anything but I think it hurts Bella that there isn’t anything between you two,” he said casually and I rolled my eyes.

“If you can’t hear her thoughts, how would you possibly know that?”

“When we dropped her off today, she started crying as soon as she was inside the house.” My body clenched at the thought of her suffering and it took all of my control not to race from the house to hers and pull her into my arms to comfort her. “Jasper said it was a mix of emotions. Grief, probably for her mother. Frustration which may have been somewhat my fault. She’s incredibly observant and she noticed whenever I struggled with her blood. She even asked me if I was on drugs.” I snorted out a laugh. “But the most prevailing emotion outside grief was consuming love mixed in an overwhelming longing and despondency. She clearly feels deeply for you. But she already thinks it’s hopeless.” It felt as though my heart was being pulverized as he spoke but I refused to give into it.

“She’ll get over it, over me. She’ll move on and find someone wonderful who won’t be taking anything from her by loving her.”

“No she won’t. Whether you like it or not, there will never be anyone for her who consumes her the way you do. You don’t think Alice has seen the future based on this stubborn decision you’ve made. It doesn’t end well. For either of you.” The pain in my chest worsened and I groaned.

“Alice has been wrong before,” I forced out.

“Yes she has. But she’s not wrong this time. I’m sorry, Carlisle, but I’m afraid I’m going to have to rebel against you one more time.”

Chapter 15: Found Tonight

Chapter Text

This author's note includes some insight into the twisted mind of the writer you are handing your time over to: *ahem* This fic has become a slow burn that I originally did not expect. I know that some of you love the scenes and relationship building with the other characters but I also know all of you just want Bella and Carlisle tofreakingget together and be in love, okay?! I know because I also want that. But as I started writing this it became very clear to me that I wanted to make sure that this wasn't just a story about Bella and Carlisle falling in love. That is the main premise and is obviously very important but I have realized that it is important for the whole family to fall in love with Bella. As the partner of their parent figure, I feel that her connection with each of the children is just as (or maybe slightly as) important as her connection with him. I PROMISE THEY WILL MAKE PROGRESS COUPLE WISE SOON! I just need that authenticity to her friendships with the Cullen kids. Also the very first Bellisle fic that I read was over 100 chapters and there was a lot of time spent building her relationships with Edward and the people around them. That is what converted me to this ship and I read that fic at least once a year because it was perfectly crafted and executed. Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

ALSO THIS CHAPTER IS ALMOST 5K WORDS. Someone tell Edward to reign it in.

The song for this chapter is Found Tonight by Ben Platt and Lin-Manuel Miranda. (Cue Broadway fangirling)

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Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Fifteen: Found Tonight

BPOV

I felt like crap the next morning. I'd spent all night crying, quieting down enough when Charlie got home so that he wouldn't suspect anything. I'd told him that I had a migraine and was just going to go to bed. He hadn't bothered me but when I left my room after I heard him go to bed, I noticed that he'd left a can of co*ke and some crackers by my door with a bottle of Tylenol. My heart cracked a bit at the thoughtful gesture. I'd taken them into my room before getting into the shower and crying quietly as the hot water ran over my face and body. I tried to imagine that the water was washing away my grief and struggles. Maybe it had or maybe I had just cried enough of it out of me but after getting out, I felt a little better. I still missed my mom but the pain was a dull ache instead of the sharp sting of loss that I'd been feeling.

I was hopeful that Charlie and I could make this work. It was awkward because I felt like he'd missed out on most of my life and in some ways, I didn't really know him. But he'd always made an effort to make me feel like he was supporting me and loved me. I supposed that we were both the casualties of a messy custody agreement.

I still didn't really know what Edward's problem was but I figured the only way to try and move past all the negativity was to move forward and get to know him. He was right: I loved his family and it was impossible for me to have a relationship with them but not with him.

As for Carlisle…

Logically, I knew that I needed to get past whatever insane crush I'd developed for the attractive, selfless doctor. It wasn't ever going to be accepted by either of our loved ones let alone society. That wasn't even mentioning the tiny issue of it being illegal for us to engage in a relationship while I was still underage. We had a whole maze of obstacles in the way of our having a happy ending.

I didn't even know if he'd ever feel the same way either. This whole thing could -and probably was -completely one sided. Aside from the flirty banter and tender connection we had shared, there wasn't really anything to lead me to believe that he felt anything more for me than that of a father for his children's friend. He'd certainly never tried to kiss me or propositioned me. I'd told myself that he was a gentleman but I had to wonder if maybe I was reading more into his actions and words than was really there because I was already half in love with him.

The thought of giving up these feelings, even as young and tender as they were, made me physically ill. It felt like chopping off a limb or denying myself something as necessary and integral to survival as oxygen. I had no idea why I felt so strongly. Grief, maybe? Whatever it was, I needed to make my best effort to set it aside and view Carlisle as nothing more than my friend's father and the town doctor.

The thought left a sour taste in my mouth.

I made it to school early and sat in my truck, avoiding any negative gossip or drama. I lost myself in a book and jumped when there was a knock on my passenger window. I looked up to see Edward standing in the rain and smirking at me as I fought to calm my racing heart. I leaned over to unlock the door and he climbed in, shutting the door behind him.

"Good morning, sunshine," he said cheerfully and I scowled. I felt like my puffy, bloodshot eyes and beleaguered countenance advertised what kind of night I'd had and he was trying to be annoyingly chipper on purpose.

"It is entirely too early for you to be smiling like that," I monotoned. His smile widened.

"Smiles are contagious."

"Don't worry. I'm vaccinated," I promised with a scowl.

"Somebody's cranky," he observed.

"Somebody needs to shut up," I snapped. His face fell and he studied me while I tried to hide my face in my book.

"Look, Bella, I know that we don't know each other that well but I'm still worried about you. Are you okay?" I heaved out a huge sigh.

"Sorry," I muttered. "It's just… there's just a lot going on with me and it's easy to lash out at you."

"Because I'm so awesome," he asked knowingly and my mouth twitched.

"I think you meant annoying."

"Trust me, you aren't the only one that thinks so," he said airily and I raised an eyebrow at him "Let's just say that you and Carlisle could start a club." My heart sped up at the mention of his name I mentally scolded myself.

"Are you about to tell me that you're a terrible child?"

"I am an extremely irritating child. Or at least, I am now."

"So Alice convinced you to side with her, huh?" He looked at me thoughtfully.

"Did Alice tell you what we're fighting about," he asked.

"No," I said with an eye roll. "Just that it was something good for Carlisle but he was resisting." His gaze sharpened and his look turned calculating.

"Maybe we should tell you," he murmured and I frowned.

"I'm not getting caught up in your family drama, Edward. Carlisle is a grown man; he can make his own decisions." Like choosing to sweep me off my feet and ride off into the sunset with me. I internally cursed my mind for immediately abandoning the quest to see Carlisle in a completely platonic fashion.

"Except this decision affects more than just him."

"It's none of my business. Besides, I highly doubt that Carlisle would be persuaded by my involvement. My opinion doesn't carry any weight with him."

"Maybe it carries more than you think," he pointed out and I mentally cursed my traitorous heart again for taking off like a herd of elephants at the thought. Before I could ask him just what he meant, someone was knocking on my driver side window and my heart took off again as I jumped. Emmett was standing there but instead of his normally unflappable and cheery demeanor he was glaring at Edward. I opened the door.

"Bells about to ring," he said and I grabbed my things and hopped out, slowing to wait for them. As soon as Edward was out of the truck, Emmett was leaning across the bed, speaking too low for me to make out most of it and pointing angrily at Edward, who was smirking and looked completely unbothered by his brother's berating. I caught some of Emmett's words when I stopped walking and strained to hear over the noise of the parking lot and student's preparing to get to class.

"... going to push him too far. You can't go spilling secrets, especially the ones that aren't yours to spill," Emmett admonished.

"His entire argument… moot if she… wanted this life. Her… important as his," Edward argued back lowly, his words fading in the rise of noise around us. He was no longer casual, instead he was leaning against my truck, his finger moving emphatically as he spoke. The bell echoed over the schoolyard and I expected their argument to end as they hurried to class but they continued their exchange as though school was the last thought on their minds. I heard my name being called from the sidewalk and turned to find Rosalie and Jasper. They gestured to me and I gave one last look at Edward and Emmett before joining them.

"Is everything okay," I asked them concernedly. Rosalie shrugged.

"Alice and Edward are just being persistent. It's upsetting the equilibrium our house usually has," Rosalie said boredly as we walked towards our classes.

"Is the fighting that bad," I asked worriedly, immediately feeling concerned for Carlisle being teamed up against two people as annoying as Edward and pushy as Alice.

"It's not really fighting," Jasper explained and I felt my concern ease as he smiled at me. "They sometimes argue and mostly Carlisle avoids talking about it at all."

"Why is Emmett so upset with Edward?"

"Emmett is worried that Edward is going to take it too far. He struggles with boundaries, especially where Carlisle is concerned." I frowned. "Honestly, Bella, don't even worry about it. And if Edward makes you feel uncomfortable or tries to drag you into it, just let us know and we'll get him to back off." I warmed a bit with the knowledge that I had friends in my corner instead of having to deal with their brother alone. "Have fun in class," they said to me before we parted ways and I went to class, replaying my conversation with Edward in my head and trying to decipher what their argument with Carlisle might be about.

I didn't even realize the bell for second period had rung until I noticed that everyone was leaving. I quickly followed them out the door and made my way to my government class. I sat heavily and reached into my bag for my book and notes. When I sat back up, I jumped as I noticed Edward sitting next to me with a sh*t-eating grin on his face.

"Are you stalking me now," I demanded and he rolled his eyes.

"Stalkers tend to be a little stealthier. You know, hiding in trees and bushes?"

"So you're an incompitent stalker," I said understandingly and he laughed.

"This is my second period too."

"Then why don't I remember seeing you before you left. Or after you came back?"

"I was working on a project in the library on your first day. And when I came back, I missed the first part of school on account of getting home so late. I showed up for my last two periods only. Why are you scowling at me," he asked finally.

"I'm hoping you'll spontaneously combust." He barked out a laugh and I noticed a few heads turn to look at him in surprise. "Seriously, Edward. I don't want to be dragged into family drama. I don't want to deal with your insane mood swings. So if that's all you want from me, just leave me alone." His face changed, immediately sincere and earnest.

"I'm doing my very best not to make you the victim of my mood swings. And I'm not trying to drag you into the drama." I quirked an eyebrow at him and he held up his hands. "Honestly. I don't want you to be at odds with Carlisle, too. Maybe… maybe we should just start fresh. Hi. I'm Edward Cullen. Sometimes I am annoying and I have an attitude." He held out a hand and I looked at it before slipping my hand into it.

"Bella Swan. I have a dead mom, a lot of sass and it's hard for me to open myself up to people." He smiled -genuinely -and shook my hand.

"Nice to meet you, Bella Swan," he whispered as the teacher called the class to order. I smiled back.

"You too. You're sister is insane," I teased and he chuckled.

"You have no idea."

The class passed slowly but I noticed that Edward made an effort to smile at me whenever my eyes wandered over to him. The two periods after that were full of some stares and whispers, though Jessica remained silent and didn't look at me much. When lunch came around, I grabbed a tray of food and headed toward the Cullen's table. I dropped into the seat by Jasper who gave me a smile as Alice gave me an effusive greeting before jumping back into whatever she had been talking to Jasper about. Rose and Emmett joined us, Emmett and I exchanging joking insults. I heard the chair next to me move and Edward dropped into the seat with a tentative smile. I smiled back and turned back to argue with Emmett about game play on the newest video game in the series we both enjoyed. Jasper joined in and started bickering with him and I laughed as it escalated to exchanging insults. Rosalie leaned across the table.

"Are you sure your truck is reliable," she asked. I shrugged, chagrined.

"No. It's so old and I don't doubt that the guy my dad bought it from got it running but honestly, I wouldn't know how to recognize an issue aside from smoke and fire rising from the engine." She laughed and began to walk me through different ways to check my truck's health. I pulled out a notebook and wrote down her instructions before thanking her profusely. I loved my truck but I knew that the older a vehicle was, the more work it took to keep them running smoothly. She renewed her offer to look at it and I promised to check the things she'd told me about and bring it to her if anything was off.
"Hey, Bella, what about a murder mystery for dinner with us," Alice asked me as she flipped through a binder.

"Um, I guess. Is a theme really necessary? Isn't it just dinner?" The look of horror she gave me answered that question.

"But why just have a boring dinner when it could befun," she asked, mortified. I laughed.

"You do whatever you want, Alice. I trust that you will make dinner perfect." She beamed and began to run mock menus by me. I approved and vetoed suggestions as she offered them, offering more realistic suggestions when she started to get carried away. Jasper gave me a grateful look whenever I redirected her from something extravagant or complicated.

"She's an unstoppable force," he said lowly, voice full of admiration and exasperation. I grinned.

"Always watch out for the short ones," I teased and he chuckled. The bell rang for fifth period and as I reached for my backpack, I noticed Edward watching me speculatively, eyes bright with… something. Approval, maybe? He made a face and stood up, waiting for me to hike my bag over my shoulder.

"Want to skip next period with me," he asked. I frowned at him, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Haven't you and I both missed more than enough school in the past couple weeks?"

"Yes but in this case, skipping is healthy." I gazed at him skeptically.

"Actually, Bella, you really should skip," Alice said, coming up beside me. "It's blood typing today," she whispered and my stomach flipped. "So maybe take Edward up on his offer and miss this one."

"Thanks, Alice," I said weakly and she winked at me. I turned back to Edward who was watching me with an expectant smirk. "Fine. I will attempt to tolerate your presence somewhere other than our classroom." He smiled and gestured for me to follow him.

"I can see why my family likes you," he said as we walked out of the cafeteria.

"Yeah, why is that?"

"You're pretty generous. You obviously couldn't care less about a themed dinner versus a normal one but you still listened to Alice's suggestions. I know you didn't understand half of what Rosalie said but you took notes anyway."

"Less than half, actually," I corrected and he smiled.

"It reminds me of Carlisle. He's the most generous man I know. It's how we are able to maintain the peaceful family dynamic we have. He willingly engages with us over our interests and he never makes us feel like they're silly or not worth his time or attention." I warmed at the comparison.

"He seems like a really great dad," I said as he led me outside towards where his silver Volvo was parked.

"He's the best."

"Can I ask you a question?" He waved for me to continue, opening the passenger side door for me and waiting for me to get in. "Why do you guys call him Carlisle? Is it because you're adopted or something else?" He smiled wryly at me and closed the door, hurrying around the car and getting in.

"Why do you call your dad, Charlie," he asked cheekily as he started the car to get the heat going.

"I didn't really see him much growing up. My mom left him not long after I was born. She… well, she didn't really like it here. I don't really know all the details. She left and took me with her. She got custody of me and he got visitation during summers and some holidays. But it was hard. I knew he was my dad but he felt kind of like a stranger. We're both kind of awkward and talking doesn't come easy for us. I knew that I was supposed to love him and I did. But I also didn't reallyknowhim and he didn't really know me. He wasn't a deadbeat or anything but… my mom never really talked about him and I've spent most of my life not really knowing who he is. As a teenager, I think I'm feeling that more than I did when I was a kid. I'm used to thinking of him as Charlie because that's how my mom always referred to him and I know he's my dad but… we didn't get to really build that relationship, you know? Even when I stayed with him, it's like neither of us knew how to bethatto each other." He watched me as I spoke, his eyes softening.

"I can't imagine what that must be like," he finally said.

"Do you know your birth parents," I asked him. His face twisted in sadness.

"I did, a long time ago. They became ill and passed away. My mom was… great. Honestly, she was such a wonderful person. She taught me a lot about how to be a good man. My father… he wasn't like her. He had very clear ideas about what I should be and what makes a man and most of it was wrong."

"Oh, so a chauvinistic ass," I said sagely and he laughed tightly.

"Very much so. When Carlisle found me… he was everything that I believed a father should be. I remember the second Christmas after I joined him, I was missing my mom and it was still a little awkward between us. The first year was a lot of adjustment and learning to communicate and getting to know each other. We didn't even really celebrate that year. So the next year, Carlisle sent me out for some nonsensical reason. I thought maybe he was just sick of me. But when I came back, he'd bought a huge Christmas tree. It took up most of the apartment and was completely ridiculous. He'd put lights on but he waited for me to come home so we could decorate it together. And it really struck me how different he was from my biological father. He'd always made my mom do that stuff alone because it wasn't 'manly' to decorate, even for Christmas. And there Carlisle was, creating this opportunity to bond and creating this memory for me, to try and cheer me up." My heart was nearly bursting as he told his story. I could picture them, a younger Carlisle and Edward, muddling along as a newly formed family. Carlisle surprising his new son, making every effort to make this boy feel loved and wanted. The longing and affection I held secreted away deep in my heart for the man increased tenfold.

"Where was Esme," I asked him. His eyes tightened.

"She was still with her ex-husband," he said and I could hear the disdain in his voice. So, Esme, like Rosalie, had a crappy ex.

"You didn't answer my question," I pointed out, hoping to distract him from whatever made his face darken. He looked at me and seemed to sense exactly what I was trying to do. He gave me a small, grateful smile.

"Part of it is because we're adopted. To be clear, Carlisle is truly a father to us and none of us consider him anything less than that. But part of it is also that he's one of my best friends. We share everything, even when we don't really want to. He's always supported me and he's sacrificed so much for my happiness. He really is my father but it goes so much further than that."

"That's great that you have that kind of relationship," I murmured. He smiled slightly and then sighed.

"How about some music," he offered and pressed a button near the radio. Classical music drifted through the speakers and I smiled softly.

"Clair de lune," I asked quietly. His eyebrows rose.

"You know Debussy?"

"Some. My mom really liked the pianists. She used to play it during her chemo sessions. She said it calmed her down and helped her sleep." I looked down sadly, remembering sitting by her chair in the hospital, IVs and vitals machines hooked up to her as we listened to music and spoke quietly until she succumbed to the toll the illness was taking on her.

"I'm sorry she didn't make it," Edward offered and I felt traitorous tears welling in my eyes. Hadn't I cried out everything I had in me last night?

"Thanks. It's better for her. She's not in pain anymore," I said automatically.

"That's true. But you're still hurting, aren't you," he said gently. The tears began to flow down my cheeks as his words resonated around my mind, settling into my wounded heart.

"I feel so lost without her," I admitted. "There are so many things that I just want to ask her or talk to her about and I can't," I admitted. "We used to tell each other everything and now I don't have anyone who can help me sort through these problems. I wouldkillto be able to hug her again and have her tell me that everything is going to be okay."

"After my mom died, I remember just wanting to smell her perfume," Edward admitted quietly and I looked over at him. "Just something familiar, like having her ruffle my hair." We stared at each other, united in our camaraderie of grief.

"I guess I can not only join Carlisle's club but you and I get to be in the same club too," I joked brokenly.

"Suckiest club ever," he complained and I laughed sadly.

"Agreed." We sat in silence for several minutes, feeling our feelings privately but not alone. I finally calmed enough that the tears stopped.

"Can I askyoua question," he asked suddenly.

"I guess."

"What do you think of my dad," he asked and I froze. Several answers screamed from inside me, begging for freedom. But I remembered that this was Carlisle's son and that his siblings were my best friends and I didn't want to lose them.

"He's really nice. He did a great job fixing my foot and he's always been very kind and polite to me." He stared at me.

"That's it? He'snice?" My cheeks began to warm and I noticed that he leaned away from me. Did he suspect my secret and was waiting for me to say something so he could tell his family about it?

"He's your dad, Edward," I said, avoiding his eyes and playing with the zipper on my backpack.

"Yeah but most women comment on his looks or his bachelor status."

"Well, yeah, he's a handsome guy. You guys are all stupid beautiful," I muttered.

"Awh, Bella, you think I'm handsome?" I rolled my eyes at him and he smirked. "Seriously, though, that's it?" I started to feel panic creeping up from the knot in my stomach.

"What do you want me to say, Edward? Your dad is a nice guy."

"I'm trying to have a serious conversation about this, Bella," he said in frustration.

"And I'm trying to subtly avoid it," I shot back.

"Emmett says you guys flirt. He said it would be nauseating if it wasn't so perfect." Oh god, Emmett had said something. Had he commented on how much disliked it? Had they discussed and had a good laugh at my expense? Or worse, were they disgusted by it and looking to get rid of me?

"Emmett's obviously reading more into the situation than is there," I deflected.

"Seriously, Bella. No judgments, no teasing. I just want to know what you think of him."

"He's amazing, okay? He is gorgeous and is just this wonderfully selfless person who is so obviously scarred by the things that happened to him when he was younger and if anything, that has just made him a better human being. He's intelligent and witty and understands the love for a good book. There. Is that what you wanted me to say?" I breathed heavily from my word vomit and he sat, grinning at me. "What the hell are you grinning at," I asked irritably.

"You like my dad," he said gleefully.

"No," I argued, "I don't. I just think he's a really good guy, okay?"

"Please, Bella. You very clearly have the hots for him. Why aren't you dating him?"

"Because I'd destroy him," I said incredulously, immediately thinking about what my father and Edward's siblings would say.

"He'd be into that," he said thoughtfully.

"Dude, it's illegal. Besides, he's a genuinely good guy. I'm sure he sees me as nothing more than his kids' friend and the daughter of his friend."

"I don't want to shatter the denial you're in but I can guarantee you that you're wrong." I scoffed at him and held up a hand when he started to argue.

"It's still legally impossible not to mention socially reprehensible."

"Maybe. Just don't assume you know what you're talking about," he said, voice light but his eyes were serious.

"Okay, well now that you've made this awkward, I'm going to go," I said, pulling my backpack into my lap.

"Awh come on, Bella. We were just opening up to each other." I paused, turning back to face him. "Bella and Carlisle, sitting in a tree," he began to sing and I scowled at him.

"I am now convinced that you never graduated kindergarten," I deadpanned before opening the car door and climbing out while he rolled in his seat with laughter. I looked at my phone and saw that we had stayed in the car well into sixth period and decided to just head to my truck. I climbed in and started it but before I could pull out, I noticed Edward at my window. I rolled it down halfway.

"What," I asked flatly.

"I'm sorry I embarrassed you. Look, I promise to keep this to myself. No more teasing. Just please don't shut me out and refuse to talk to me except to insult me. I mean, definitely keep insulting me because I think you are very clever. But please don't stop talking to me," he pleaded and I sighed.

"Why do you care so much," I asked.

"I don't really have any friends, outside of my family. People don't really… well, they don't really warm to us. You're the first person who actually wanted to be our friend and not just try and hook up or fish for gossip. I like you, Bella Swan, and I would be heartbroken if we couldn't be friends." I listened to his confession silently before rolling my eyes.

"Fine," I said, feigning apathy. He grinned before kissing me on the cheek.

"Does this mean I can come over after school and we can hang out?"

"Only if you bring Alice with you. Or a burger. Actually, burgerthenAlice. All this emotional stuff has me famished."

"Deal," he said through a laugh and started walking back to his car, waving briefly as I pulled out.

My mind whirled on the drive home as the realization of what had just happened hit me.

I'd told Edward Cullen that I liked his father.

And instead of being disgusted or disapproving, it seemed an awful lot like he was trying to encourage me into pursuing him.

And even crazier, I felt like I might have found a friend in Edward that rivaled Alice.

Chapter 16: Dancing in the Moonlight

Chapter Text

Hey everyone! Thanks for the positive feedback about the last chapter. I realize that some of you think Edward is annoying and that is fair because my Edward has a lot of personality. And the man will do whatever he has to make sure the Carlisle gets to be happy to. But I also think that even though he lived in a different time, Edward is still just seventeen. Forever. He's going to be a little annoying... or at least, tenacious. Also for those of you asking, the Bellisle fic that remains my favorite fanfic almost ever is called Take This Heart by Bookwormbaby2580. It is in ff and ao3. Brutal warning though: it is DARK. Like very, very mature kind of dark. It is not for all people. But it is absolutely beautiful and is so real that honestly, it's canon for me now. Read her ANs at the beginning of chapters because some people can't handle some of the stuff she includes. If you do read it though, let me know. We can fangirl together.

The song for this chapter is Dancing in the Moonlight covered by Jubel.

Connect with me!
Twitter: teamdemonmonkey
Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Sixteen: Dancing in the Moonlight

CPOV

I stared out the window intently, nervous energy building inside me as I waited for Charlie's police cruiser to approach the house enough that I could hear it.

"You know, instead of standing at the window like a creep, you could come help get things ready for them," Edward teased wryly as he helped set the table. I grinned but didn't move from my spot.

"Why do the labor when I have children who can do it for me," I teased back.

"Child labor is illegal, Carlisle," Emmett said in mock outrage. I chuckled to myself as Rosalie hit him in the back of the head.

"No, Emmett, you can't put the centerpiecethere! Ugh, just hand it over and I'll do it myself," Alice scolded. She'd been put out with me since I learned that she was planning a themed dinner party and had immediately forbid her from doing anything other than a simple, normal,un-themeddinner. She'd equated my stifling of her creative vision to being put upon by the Gestapo. I'd merely reminded her that Charlie and possibly even Bella were already going to be uncomfortable in the presence of seven vampires without worrying about extra things like a murder mystery. She'd rolled her eyes but conceded.

If only she would give up so easily on our other feud.

"Fat chance of that," Edward scoffed from the dining room and my jaw clenched. Edward had been just as annoying as Alice, telling me about Bella every day after school. He made a point to tell me about how close they were becoming and even though I knew that he was just trying to get under my skin, I still felt that jealous monster rising inside me and willing me to rip his head off his shoulders. He also made sure to point out how sad Bella was and that I could change that if I wanted to. "And I will continue to do so until you change your mind," he vowed cheekily.

"You know, it's annoying as hell when you two have a conversation that the rest of us can only hear half of," Emmett complained and I laughed.

"Whatever, you're just jealous you're not in on the juicy gossip," Jasper said as he entered the house from a hunt. Everyone had gone at some point during the day, except for me. Edward had been hunting every night since he'd returned almost a week ago. He assured me that it was merely a preventative measure for Bella's safety.

"Esme, do you need any help with dinner," I asked as the dining room descended into petty arguing. She was in the kitchen, working on the meal we would all have to pretend to eat. It was a reminder of how food was such a central theme to social gatherings for humans. If there had been the option to invite them over and have it feel natural without having to secrete food into our napkins or, god forbid, actually eat it, I'd have extendedthatinvitation.

"That would be lovely, Carlisle," she answered and I sped to the kitchen to assist her. There were dishes everywhere, some dirty from preparation, others in various stages of completion. Esme was at the counter, layering ingredients in a tiramisu.

"What can I do," I asked her and she gestured toward the oven.

"Would you pull the bread out of the oven?" I grabbed oven mitts from the drawer and pulled out the perfectly baked rolls, placing them on a counter to cool. "Thank you. Now would you be a dear and turn the stove on under that pan to about medium heat? You need to get a nice sear on the scallops." I did as she asked and pulled the sea scallops from the fridge. I worked at a human pace, drying each one with a paper towel before placing them on a cutting board to be cooked and seasoned.

"Okay, so explain this to me, Carlisle," Alice said, entering the kitchen and leaning against the counter with her arms crossed. "I try to plan a nice, fun, murder mystery dinner party that would have been ridiculously entertaining and you say it's 'too much'. But Esme decides to make a four course meal and you are completely on board with that."

"You really wanted to play whodunnit with the Chief of Police, Alice," I asked wryly and she grinned.

"He would have loved it. He would have had it solved before any of the rest of us. Assuming Emmett and Edward didn't cheat," she muttered darkly. I laughed, shaking my head at her.

"We invited them over for dinner, not a show. Although if we get through dinner withoutsomethinghappening, I'll give a very generous check to the charity of your choice." Her tinkling laugh filled the room. We both knew that we wouldn't make it through dinner without incident and that I would write that check regardless.

"Hey, I resent the implication that we are demon children," Edward said from the family room with feigned outrage.

"Of course you aren't demon children," I said and waited for his 'damn right' before continuing. "Because I'm the demon, which would make all of you demon spawn." Emmett began to laugh riotously and I smiled to myself.

Had I smiled this much before Bella was introduced into our lives?

I had enjoyed time with my children and we had certainly had our fair share of fun and jokes. But I felt almost electrified since I'd met Bella. I was more inclined to tease and joke with my family rather than agree placidly or step into the role of father figure. Had meeting her changed me or was this merely the effect she had had on my children, manifesting at home?

"It's her," Edward said, his voice tinged with exasperation. "Alice and I keep telling you how good she is for this family, foryou, and I swear, it's like talking to a brick wall."

If you continue to try and force this, I will take you to the roof and throw you off-where are you going, I thought as he began to zip up the stairs to the attic.

"I'm checking to see how high the drop is and decide if it's worth it." I rolled my eyes at his antics.

"Seriously, children," I said, invoking my not often used 'dad voice', "I don't want anyone to make our guests uncomfortable tonight or to try and make anything happen between Bella and I. Unless you have forgotten, it is illegal for a man of even my perceived age to court a lady of hers. We are going to have a nice dinner and you will all be on yourbestbehavior."

"Fine, Dad,"Emmett and Jasper groaned from the backyard where Jasper had convinced Emmett to toss a ball around with him. Rosalie gave a noncommittal response from the family room, where I could hear the pages of a magazine turn. Alice stared at me for several long minutes before rolling her eyes and agreeing. I didn't hear anything from Edward who had taken up my post at the window, watching for the arrival of our guests.

"I'm sure everyone will be lovely, Carlisle," Esme said from behind me. "Right, Edward," she asked pointedly and he sighed.

"Fine," he muttered grudgingly. I nodded, satisfied, and began to place batches of scallops in the hot oil in the pan, searing them smartly before flipping them and waiting a few minutes before pulling them out. Only a few minutes passed before we all heard the engine of Charlie's cruiser turn off the highway and onto our drive. As they neared, we could hear the two heartbeats in the car, the one I recognized as Bella's starting to speed up as they approached.

"Is she nervous about being around all seven of us," I asked Jasper quietly. He burst out laughing while Edward gave a deep sigh.

"You really are an idiot," he mumbled and moved to the piano to begin playing as the engine cut off and we heard car doors open and close.

"I should be out there to greet our guests," I said, looking down at the last batch of scallops I was finishing.

"No," Alice said, moving towards the kitchen door. "Humans aren't as formal as they used to be. It would be weird if you waited to greet them. Let us handle it and you can come out in a moment. It will be more natural and set them at ease." I frowned at the lack of manners but agreed. The doorbell echoed across the house and Alice danced to it to answer.

"Hey, Bella! Hi, Charlie," she greeted enthusiastically before I heard her move and their footsteps came across the threshold. "Let me take your jackets for you." I smiled that at least she was using her manners instead of leaving them to settle in awkwardly. There was rustling of fabric and the closet door opened and closed.

"I brought the salad," Bella's musical voice drifted to me over the music of Edward's hands on the piano.

"Great! Do you want to take it to the kitchen and we'll dish it up?" My body tensed in anticipation of her coming nearer.

"I'm just going to go greet Charlie while you finish the sauce for those scallops," Esme said blithely -tooblithely -before leaving the room.

"Et tu,Esme," I said petulantly. She laughed quietly.

"You must be Bella," she said as their paths crossed. "I have heard so much about you. I'm Esme."

"It's so nice to meet you," Bella said graciously. "Edward has said lovely things about you." I smiled at the diplomacy, sure that Edward hadn't been half as generous as he'd like. I heard a low grunt of agreement from the piano bench.

"He's a sweetheart," Esme said fondly. "I'm just going to go say hello to your father. The kitchen's right through there," she said and a few moments later, the door opened and I was assaulted by her heavenly scent.

"Oh," she said in surprise. I looked up at her and smiled, forcing myself to stay frozen to the spot to stop from sweeping her into my arms and placing my face at her throat to inhale her alluring scent. Edward cleared his throat tightly from the piano.

I'm sorry,I thought contritely. Those kinds of thoughts certainly didn't help him.

"I didn't know you were in here," she said, completely oblivious to the thoughts plaguing me. "Not that that's a weird place for you to be since, you know, you live here." She blushed deeply the more she spoke and I couldn't help the small chuckle that escaped me.

"I think it's probably fair to be surprised to find me in the kitchen cooking. I'm still not sure what Esme was thinking, letting me in here." She laughed, the tension in her shoulder releasing and my own tension eased in response.

"I made a salad. Alice told me I didn't need to bring anything but I pestered her into letting me bring this. Made her tell me what kind of salad I should make and that is a mistake that I will never be making again," she said with the faint look of someone who has misjudged horribly.

"Alice has ideas for absolutely everything."

"Even your life," she mumbled under her breath and I sent a string of ungentlemanly words in my mind to Edward who laughed under his breath as he introduced himself to Charlie.

"You can put it over here on the counter. I'm not sure what Esme wants done with it." She moved past me to the open space I had gestured to and I shivered as I felt the heat of her body passing over me. She set a bowl down and then came to look past my shoulder to the stove.

"That smells amazing," she breathed and my own breath stuttered as her chest pressed lightly to my arm, her hair brushing the sleeve of the black shirt Alice insisted I wear.
"No promises on how it will taste," I teased quietly and she gave my arm a playful push. I looked down at her and our eyes held. I was drowning in pools of melting chocolate, our faces growing slowly closer, entranced by her.

"Here, Bella, let me help you," Alice announced loudly as she pushed through the kitchen doors. Bella jumped away from me like she'd been shocked and that was enough to remind me about where we were and who was here. She flushed deeply and turned to the salad while Alice grabbed the plates. "Hey, dad, why don't you go say hello to Charlie," Alice suggested and I noticed Bella flinch ever so slightly at the name.

Did it bother her that her best friends were my children?

I tucked that thought away for later and removed my sauce from the heat.

"Alice, please attempt to refrain from telling Bella how horrible I am for preventing you from killing anyone at this dinner party," I teased with a fond kiss to the top of her head.

"You call it murder, I call it a conversation starter," she said airily and I saw Bella behind her, hands pressed together as she mouthed an emphatic 'thank you'. I bit back a laugh and held up my hands.

"Wouldn't want to commit a murder with the Chief of Police here, Alice. He'll think we're bad influences." I walked out the kitchen door and found Esme and Charlie seated in the family room. Emmett and Jasper were still outside, keeping up the pretense of being invested in their football game. Edward was at the piano, playing softly while Rosalie continued to read on a chair. Charlie stood as I approached and we shook hands firmly.

"Charlie, it is so good to see you again. Sorry I've neglected you. I think Esme is hoping that if I cook, this whole thing will be ruined and she can just order pizza." Charlie laughed and we sat back down.

"Before Bella came to live with me, I was a frequent customer of the pizza place in town. It's a good thing she can cook because I could burn water."

"How is work going," I asked after our chuckles had faded.

"A lot of the same. There's not a lot going on here but they did call to talk to me about the death of the sheriff in Walla Walla."

"I heard about that," Esme murmured. "It's just heartbreaking. Did you know him?" His face had grown somber.

"Not well but he worked in Jefferson County before moving east. I wish I could do more. They aren't sure if the two other crimes that happened the week before are related or not. It's just a bad situation all around." We sat in solemn silence until Alice and Bella emerged from the kitchen a few minutes later just as Emmett and Jasper came in from out back.

"Hey, Bella," Jasper said with an easy smile as he moved over to Alice's side, following her into the kitchen and reappearing a minute later, balancing dishes as he followed her into the dining room.

"Bella," Emmett exclaimed and grabbed Bella to swing her into an enthusiastic embrace. She laughed and leaned up to his ear, breathing words too low for even the rest of us to hear. Emmett froze and dropped her, staring at her in horror before his eyes flew to Charlie and back. I frowned, wondering what she had said to him. I gave Charlie a subtle glance but he had a soft smile on his face. Emmett tried to say something to Bella but she raised her eyebrows at him with her arms crossed over her chest and he finally nodded grudgingly.

"Dinner is ready," Alice announced to the room, brushing past the strange exchange. We all stood and headed to the dining room where everyone found the place card with their name on it. While I assumed Bella and Charlie would find it formal, it's purpose was to help us keep up the charade of eating dinner. Emmett and Edward had secured bags under the table at our seats where we could subtly dispose of our food. Charlie chivalrously helped Esme with her chair and I took advantage of the opportunity to assist Bella, who was seated next to my place at the head of the table with Edward on her left. I pulled the chair out for her and she smiled at me as she took her seat, half standing to allow me to push the chair in. My hand brushed her arm as I went to take my own seat and it felt like someone was shooting carbonation into my blood. I heard her own heart pick up into a frantic rhythm and then subtly shook my head to clear it as I sat. Charlie sat on my other side, adjusting his napkin on his lap.

Salads had been placed on small plates on top of our dinner plates. We all picked up our utensils and began to eat.

Or pretend to in my family's case, secreting small bits when we felt our guests wouldn't notice.

"Bella, this salad is divine. What's in it," Esme asked enthusiastically and I gave her a grateful smile.

"It's a fennel and blood orange salad with a raspberry orange vinaigrette," she replied.

"It's simply delightful!"

"You can thank Alice," Bella said with a half smile. "She picked it out."

"Why do they call them blood oranges," Jasper asked in genuine confusion.

"Probably the color," Edward answered.

"That doesn't make any sense. Who would want to eat something that sounded like it had blood in it," Emmett argued. They began to bicker and I raised my head to the ceiling in exasperation.

"Actually, it's because they grow them in cold weather," Bella broke in and the boys stopped arguing to look at her. "They grow them when it gets cold at night because that's the only time anthocyanins develop which is what gives it that red color."

"How do you know that," Rosalie asked curiously. I watched as the tips of Bella's ears grew red, spreading to meet the crimson growing from her cheeks to her neck. I glanced at Edward worriedly but he merely rolled his eyes at me.

"I, uh, read it in a vampire novel once," she said quickly but we still caught it. Edward coughed and began to choke on the drink he'd been pretending to take. She pounded on his back to try and help rid the liquid from his lungs.

"You read vampire novels," Emmett asked with a huge grin on his face and I could see by the light in his eyes that he was ready to begin a whole round of teasing.

"I used to, occasionally, pick one up when my options were limited," she said with forced casualness.

"Like, vampireromance," Edward asked slyly, shooting me a quick sh*t eating grin.

Do not even think of pursuing this line of questioning, Edward Anthony Masen Cullen. His smile broadened.

"If it wasn't totally unethical, I would definitely blackmail you with this," Edward teased.

"Right, because you are a shining beacon of ethics," Bella replied dryly and I couldn't hold back a snort.

"Well now I should definitely blackmail you." She looked across the table to Charlie who was watching the exchange with a bemused glance.

"Hey, is it still murder if you warn them first," she asked him.

"That is called a threat," he said with a quirk of his lips.

"Damn," she muttered.

"See, you're stuck with me," Edward said, putting his arm around her shoulders while she glared at him. At the sight of him holding her, a primal desire to rip his arm off his body rose within me and he looked directly at me and smirked.

I swear, Edward, you are over a hundred years old. Could youpleasegrow up, I thought. He chuckled which only made Bella's eyes narrow more, assuming he was laughing at her.

"Go to hell," she whispered.

"And leave you here all alone," he asked with exaggerated confusion and she shoved him back to his seat. I gave him a hard look.

"I'd apologize for my children but apparently they've all been replaced by demon spawn," I said to Charlie, chuckling. Esme and Alice grabbed the salad plates from us and disappeared into the kitchen.

"It doesn't bother me. Bella can hold her own against anyone. Honestly, I pity them because that's a losing battle," he teased with a wink to Bella who shrugged proudly.

"I was raised to take no sh*t," she said and I smiled at the exchange, noticing the subtle shift in brightness in Charlie's eyes. Alice and Esme reappeared with bowls and a tureen of what smelled like soup.

"Our next course is cream of wild mushroom soup that Edward made," Esme said proudly and Bella turned to look at Edward suspiciously.

"Did you use poisonous mushrooms," she asked shrewdly.

"Yes," he said seriously, "but all the poison cooked out."

"Look on the bright side, Bella. If it kills you, you won't have to look at that ugly mug in Government and Biology every day," Emmett suggested. Edward picked up his roll that Esme had placed on his plate and lobbed it at Emmett who immediately picked up his soup spoon and aimed precisely at Edward's head. I cleared my throat loudly and they stopped, head's down.

"Definitely demon spawn," Bella muttered and laughter broke over the table.

"Your boys remind me of my friends when I was younger," Charlie said fondly. "I didn't have siblings growing up but I was really close with Harry Clearwater and Billy Black out in La Push. We used to fight like that." My family stilled at the mention of the council members on the reservation. Panicked glances were exchanged but I remained calm.

"Friends are the family we choose for ourselves. Do you still see them often," I asked casually.

"We usually go fishing every weekend or every other weekend if work gets in my way. Bella spent more time on the reservation during her summers than she did in town," he said and everyone's eyes flew to Bella, including mine.

"Yeah, Jake and I spent a lot of time getting into trouble. Well, mostly me. Turns out it's really easy to hurt yourself on a beach," she muttered self-consciously.

"Seriously, Bella, how did you make it to seventeen with your proclivity for injury," Emmett teased, subtling guiding the conversation away from the only members of the community who knew what we were and could potentially expose us.

"Wow, Emmett, that was a four syllable word. Did Rosalie teach that one to you," she responded in a voice usually reserved for toddlers. Emmett scowled at her and tried to subtly flip her the bird from just above the table. She started laughing.

"Emmett Cullen, if I see that kind of disrespect again, I won't hesitate to let Bella get up from this table and teach you a lesson," I said sharply and Bella giggled.

"Sorry," he muttered. We continued to eat in silence for several minutes before Bella spoke again.

"Esme, Edward told me that you like to garden? What's your favorite thing to grow," she asked and Esme glowed at the question.

"I have so many favorites and the climate here is wet enough that I have a lot of options. But I will always love growing hydrangeas. Such a simple flower but still beautiful."

"Do you ever grow vegetables?"

"I have a whole vegetable garden. I grow so much that we usually just donate it to local families so it doesn't go to waste."

"Do you ever grow aubergines," Bella asked.

"Sometimes, but they have to be grown in the greenhouse here since we don't have a lot of sun and they need drier conditions." Emmett stood up and pulled his shirt over his head, revealing his bare chest.

"Emmett, what the hell," Rosalie demanded. He ignored her and slipped his shoes off his feet, pulling his socks off next.

"Emmett, put your shirt back on," Edward barked.

"Seriously, what is wrong with you," Jasper snapped. Emmett popped the button on his jeans and started to unzip the fly.

"Son, you need to put your clothes on right the hell now," Charlie ordered and Emmett flinched but still pulled his pants down, his grizzly bear printed boxers now exposed.

"Emmett, this isn't funny," Bella shouted amongst the chaos of everyone insisting he put his clothes back on and my eyes landed on her. Her face was outraged but I couldn't miss the sparkle in her eye. Emmett glared at her petulantly and whipped his boxers down in one quick motion. She had already looked away, her head turned toward me while her hand was pressed to the side of her face to block her view of him. Her eyes met mine and I shook my head at her in amused disapproval. She grinned widely at me and it felt like molten lava moving from my chest to my limbs.

"Dude, put itaway," Jasper shouted from his position next to Emmett as he tried to edge his chair away from the nude man.

"That's enough," Charlie said, standing, authority radiating from him. He walked over to Emmett and handed him his boxers. "Put them on," he said gruffly. Emmett hurried to comply, stuttering out attempts at explanation.

"Sir, I'm so sorry. Bella dared me," he began.

"My daughter understands the importance of the law and doesn't cross that line," he countered. Once Emmett had his boxers back on, Charlie grabbed his wrists and placed handcuffs over them while Emmett stared at Bella, wildly, begging for her to tell him. "I'm afraid I'm going to have to place you under arrest for indecent exposure, son." He guided him out of the dining room while Emmett continued to yell over his shoulder at Bella. The rest of the family was following them out, trying to talk Charlie out of taking him and for Emmett to just shut up. Bella and I stood with them, following at a leisurely pace.

"I thought we agreed you wouldn't get my sons arrested," I reminded her loftily. She grinned at me and god, it was the most beautiful I'd ever seen her.

"Emmett was the one who decided to show everyone his terms and conditions," she pointed out. "I'm as shocked as you are."

The minx.

"Don't think that I didn't notice that he was perfectly content being clothed until you said the French word for eggplant," I pointed out and she looked up at me.

"You caught that?"

"It helps that I speak French," I pointed out.

"You speak French? Fluently?"

"Tu est mon univers. Ne pas vous dire ce que je ressens est la chose la plus difficile que j'aie jamais faite," I said reverently, gazing at her face fixedly. Her breathing hitched and the familiar blush rose in her cheeks.

"What does that mean," she breathed. I didn't answer, feeling myself being drawn into her like a star to a black whole: powerless to stop, all-consuming and inevitable. Before I could say anything, Charlie's voice broke into our moment.

"Bella, let's go," he called and she snapped her eyes away from mine to where he stood, obscured by my family -probably purposely -at the driver's side of the cruiser with Emmett sitting in the back, looking lost.

"Excuse me for just a moment," Bella said softly before moving past my family, pulling her phone from her pocket. She walked up to Emmett's window and pointed her camera at him.

"Say cheese," she cooed, snapping a picture of him in the back of the cop car in nothing but his boxers. He stared at her slack jawed before starting to yell through the car door at her. Charlie opened the door, laughing to himself and helped Emmett out, removing the cuffs from his wrists.

"You were in on it the whole time," Emmett asked him, dumbfounded.

"Sure was, kid. Bella told me what her plan was before we left and I suggested taking it to the next level and getting you in cuffs," he said plainly and Emmett stared at him for a few moments before letting out a loud guffaw. Edward and Jasper were congratulating Bella on her successful hoodwinking of their brother while Rosalie shoved the clothes Emmett had left in the dining room into his chest.

"Sorry for interrupting dinner," Bella said to Esme as we began to move back into the house. Esme started laughing and pulled Bella into her side.

"There is no reason to apologize," she said once she had stopped laughing. "That was the best comeuppance I have ever witnessed and Emmett definitely deserved it. He's such a sh*t sometimes." Bella's eyebrows shot up in surprise and Esme began laughing again. We all walked back into the dining room except for Alice and Esme who stopped in the kitchen to grab the main course. Jasper was teasing Emmett and Edward was praising Bella again. We sat and Esme and Alice placed dishes of the sea scallops I had made along with ravioli in front of each of us. I realized as I pretended to eat this meal that I wished I could have enjoyed this food the way Bella had. I didn't often miss human food -I certainly had no appetite for it now -but I could see the anticipation in Bella's face as she inhaled the smell of the food from the chafing dishes, I wanted to share the experience with her.

"The entree is asparagus and ricotta ravioli and seared sea scallops in a lemon beurre blanc sauce," Alice announced excitedly. Bella leaned toward me.

"Should I be worried this might kill me," she asked, the mischief alight in her eyes once more.

"Most definitely. But since you ate Edward's poisonous mushroom soup, if you do die, he'll take the fall and I'll get away free and clear." She giggled and leaned in to take a bite of food cautiously. I watched as her eyes slipped closed and her shoulders dropped.

"Holy crap," she muttered, low enough that I don't think she meant for anyone to hear her. She looked over at me and I smiled. "This is amazing," she said and I felt unreasonably proud, almost like a peaco*ck ruffling his feathers until his tail was on display.

"Peaco*ck is right," Edward muttered, too low for Bella and Charlie to hear.

Are you sure you want to start comparing ego and hubris, boy, I thought to him warningly and he flashed a quick smile at me.

"You know, Carlisle, I never took you for the type to lose your sanity over a girl," he mocked. I sighed quietly.

Neither did I.

Our private conversation was interrupted by the ringing of a phone. Charlie reached into his pocket and pulled his phone out, frowning at the screen.

"I'm sorry, I have to take this," he said quickly, standing and leaving the room for perceived privacy. He walked out of the house and sat in the cruiser. He pulled up his radio and started to communicate with the dispatcher via codes. It sounded like he was being called in. I noticed that Bella kept staring after him worriedly.

"I'm sure it's nothing," I said soothingly and she turned back to me. Only moments later, Charlie came back in, his face tight with stress.

"I'm sorry, Carlisle, Esme but the station just called and they need me to come in. I hate to cut the evening short but we have to leave." Bella's face fell with the announcement and I felt equal disappointment sitting like a stone in my stomach.

"I could drive Bella home later," Alice offered. "If you're going to be working, she'd just be waiting at the police station anyway. She could stay here with us." Charlie looked over at Bella who must have made some sort of face in agreement because he nodded.

"I'll see you later at home then, Bells. Again, thank you very much for dinner. It was wonderful." I stood up and Bella followed. We walked with Charlie out to his cruiser.

"Is everything okay," she asked Charlie and he gave her a smile but it didn't meet his eyes.

"Yes. Just some scheduling issues," he told her and I heard his heart beating slightly faster and smelled his sweat glands activating.

Why was he lying to his daughter?

"Okay. Be safe, please," she said to him when we got to the cruiser. She wrapped her arms around him and he reciprocated, squeezing her tightly before letting her go.

"Thank you for coming, Charlie. We'll make sure Bella makes it home safe," I promised and he gripped my hand briefly before climbing into the cruiser and pulling out. Bella and I watched his car disappear and I heard when he hit the highway instead of the gravel of the drive and he accelerated quickly towards the police station.

"Something happened," she said quietly, arms wrapped around herself either for warmth or comfort, I wasn't sure.

"Possibly. But this is a pretty sleepy town and your father is very good at his job. He'll get whatever it is sorted out."

"Yeah," she said but I could tell she wasn't entirely convinced.

"Come on," I said to her, gesturing for us to head into the house. "I'll let you skip the entree and just eat dessert if you want." She stared at me incredulously as we walked.

"Are you joking right now? I'm going to eat everything on my plate and probably go back for seconds." Had I been human, I might have taken a leaf from her book and blushed. "You're a gifted doctor. You adopted kids with the same medical condition as you so they could have proper care. You speak Frenchandyou can cook. How has some lucky woman not locked you down yet," she asked, baffled. I stopped, staring at her. She walked forward a few more steps before realizing I wasn't with her and turned around. She came closer and I lost myself in the curve of her face and the shine of her hair.

"The right woman just hasn't come along yet," I murmured.

"I can't imagine many women find themselves interesting enough to catch the eye of Doctor Carlisle Cullen." She spoke as softly as I had, a slight breathlessness to her voice.

"No. Not many," I agreed, putting just the slightest emphasis on the last word.

Not many.

Just her.

I reached up and brushed an errant lock of hair behind her ear. There was a buzzing under my skin as my fingertips made contact with her delicate skin. Her eyes fluttered closed at the contact and her breath caught. I gently moved my other hand along her jaw to cradle her face, moving my face closer to hers slowly.

Slow enough to let her stop me.

She didn't try to stop me. Our lips were scant centimeters apart when Emmett's voice broke through my hazy brain.

"Just kiss her already," he hissed, too quiet for her to have heard. It broke through the haze in my brain and I was brought crashing back to reality.

We shouldn't be doing this.

"Emmett, I will murder you," Alice vowed darkly and I pulled my face back from Bella's, not quite able to break off contact completely. Her eyes opened and she watched me, confusion and questions swirling inside the dark irises.

"Let's go eat," I murmured before I let her face go with one final caress to her jaw. I stepped back completely and offered her my arm. She blew out a breath and slipped her arm into mine.

"Yeah," was all she said quietly and I knew that had it not been for Emmett, I would have kissed this beautiful vixen senseless.

I couldn't do that.

Right?

French translation: You are everything. Not telling you how I feel is the hardest thing I've ever done.

Technically the first part literally translates to Your are my universe. If any of this French is incorrect (looking at you French readers. I know you are there.) please let me know because my ability to speak French is fading from disuse.

Chapter 17: Holding On

Chapter Text

Sorry for the late update folks. I write when my crotch goblins have gone to bed but it also means that I am exhausted. So there was a little bit more editing needed from all the sleep typing. And then the characters took over this chapter like Alice had possessed them and almost 8k words later, here we are.

The song for this chapter is Holding On by The Piano Guys.

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Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Seventeen: Holding On

CPOV

“Can I get you more tiramisu, Bella,” Esme asked from across the table. Bella groaned.

“I think if I ate another bite I might explode,” she said with a groan.

“Why don’t we go turn on a movie,” Alice suggested. We all stood up and Bella started gathering the dishes near her.

“No need for that,” I said with a smile. She looked up at me and I placed a hand on her shoulder, gently guiding her away from the table and out of the dining room. Her skin was deliciously warm against mine, her scent billowing around me until I felt half intoxicated. “Esme and I will clean up. You just relax so that you don’t explode and we have to clean you up.” She sighed gratefully and followed Alice and the others to the small theater room off the family room. I turned back and began to help Esme clear the table. We moved at human pace, gathering dishes and cutlery.

“We should talk, Carlisle,” Esme said a few moments in.

“Of course, my dear. What would you like to talk about?”

“Bella.” I paused and shot her a look heavy with warning.

“Esme, I have Alice and your husband pestering me daily about this. Are you really going to be at odds with me as well?”

“Relax, Carlisle, I have no interest in pestering you or fighting with you.” I relaxed infetismally. “But you and I have known each other a long time. Whether we are pretending to be siblings or spouses, we have been partners. As such, I feel like we can talk openly about this. I’m not trying to push an agenda on you, although I have my opinions and I won’t apologize for them. I just feel like it would be beneficial for you to talk this through with someone who doesn’t have an agenda.” I smiled softly at her as we carried everything into the kitchen. “So tell me, Carlisle; how are you really doing?” I placed my pile of dishes in the sink and then leaned against the counter, folding my arms over my chest as I considered her question.

“It’s hard, not giving in to the overwhelming compulsions I feel. I constantly feel like I am at war with myself. On the one hand, I know that, logically, it is better for Bella if I don’t pursue her romantically. She’s young and has her whole life ahead of her. I know the reasons why it can’t happen.”

“And the other hand,” she asked knowingly. I ran a hand through my hair in frustration.

“On the other hand, I crave her. Not her blood, like Edward does, but her. I find myself wanting nothing more than to be near her, to hear her voice, ask her questions, puzzle at the way her mind must work. When I see her, I want nothing more than to sweep her into my arms and lose myself in her for eternity! It is maddening!” She placed a hand on my back and leaned against my shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” she said softly. “That sounds like a terrible struggle to deal with.”

“It doesn’t help that Edward and Alice are so actively trying to force us together.”

“No, it doesn’t. I think that they have made their decisions on what they feel would be best and act accordingly.”

“It’s not their decision to make,” I said shortly.

“I know,” she placated, rubbing my back lightly. “But just like you have your perspective, they also have theirs. You’re worried that if you pursue Bella, you will be forced to change her and that changing could lead to her resenting you for eternity and possibly also damning her, correct?” I nodded silently. “Where do you think those hangups come from, Carlisle?”

“I wouldn't call them ‘hangups’,” I muttered irritably but she just waited serenely for me to answer her question. I sighed deeply, the ache in my chest that I felt whenever I recalled my human life flaring to life. “My father,” I muttered finally. “And possibly Rosalie.”

“It’s nothing to be ashamed of, Carlisle. Your beliefs and perception are painted by your experiences. Your father was an intolerant man who tried to imbue you with his ideas and beliefs. Your father persecuted and murdered innocent people in the name of religious fervor. But you have lived a life, Carlisle. You know he was wrong and several centuries later, I’d like to think you have an even clearer picture of what the world is really like. We have seen the miracles of religion but we have also seen the heartbreaking tragedy of what men like your father have compelled people to do. You are not your father. And his beliefs should remain just that: his.” I looked at her sadly.

“I believe in God, Esme. And everything I have ever read tells me that we are abominations of the worst kind. What kind of afterlife waits for the undead?”

“For those of our kind who have murdered and tormented, perhaps. But I was raised Christian too and everything I ever learned about God was that it doesn’t matter how badly you have sinned, so long as you repent. You can’t help what you are. You won’t end up in the afterlife to find that you’ve already been judged based solely on what you are and not who you are. And while we’re on the subject, do I need to be worried about you?” She pressed her hands to her hips.

“Why would you need to be worried about me,” I asked, baffled.

“You’ve spent more time in the last month talking about death and what happens after we die than you have the entire time I’ve known you, Carlisle Cullen. I hope you aren’t thinking about doing anything rash.” I took her hands in mine and squeezed them.

“I promise that I have no intentions of going anywhere. I have merely considered this decision for both its short term consequences and its long term.”

“Alright. Let’s talk about that. You mentioned Rosalie and I think you should know that Rosalie in no way resents what you did for her.” I pinned her with a derisive look. “She was at first. In the beginning, after she had her revenge. But after that was over and she was finally forced to think about what she now was, yes, she had some resentment. She thought she’d just have to live with the memory of what happened to her forever. She never expected to find Emmett and truth be told, she hadn’t processed what happened to her. It was so much easier to focus on the picture perfect life she had envisioned for herself than to think about the betrayal that happened when her fiance allowed his friends and himself to treat her like expendable garbage.”

“That may be true but I hardly gave any of you a choice and I certainly can’t give Bella the choice because in order to make an educated choice, I would have to disclose what we are. She would either run in terror, thus requiring the Volturi to step in or she would choose immortality and…” I trailed off, the deep insecurities that I rarely had to acknowledge rising to the surface, filling me with panic.

“And,” Esme prompted.

“And she would grow to regret her decision. She’d leave,” I whispered and I heard Esme’s sudden intake of air.

“I realize now that Edward and I are the reason that you believe that it is possible,” she said sadly. “We should haven’t left you alone.”

“I would certainly never force you to stay,” I argued but she shushed me.

“This isn’t a normal coven, Carlisle. It’s not an autonomous collective that comes and goes as they please. This is a family that you made. When we left, we were leaving you. And I am so sorry that we did, that I didn’t try to stay in touch more. It wasn’t easy. Edward… well, he still has a lot of regrets about what he did. He’s allowing those regrets to drive his need to ensure that you end up happy.” I opened my mouth to argue that I was happy but she placed her hand on my mouth, silencing me. “I know you say you are happy. And I don’t doubt that you have found peace in the way your life has turned out. But Edward thinks that it’s not true, or at the very least not fulfilling. He’s driven by the guilt he carries because even if I don’t know the extent of the hurt you’ve suffered, he does. And he blames himself for some of that pain.”

“Regardless, it isn’t his decision to make. It certainly isn’t his life that he’s playing God with.” She co*cked an eyebrow at me.

“You say that you don’t want to take Bella’s agency away from her. But by choosing not to pursue a relationship with her, aren’t you already stealing her agency away?” I stilled as the question swirled around my already chaotic mind.

She was right.

I was making the decision for Bella, the same as I would be if I were changing her. The difference was that this decision felt like I was risking less, had less to lose. Of course I would lose her. That was almost enough to deter me from my course. But wasn’t it better to walk away from her without breaking her heart than it would be if I changed her and she decided to leave, shattering the eternity we were supposed to spend together along with my heart?

I was just trying to protect myself from having my heart broken, being rejected, and claimed it was in the name of her own protection. She did have her whole life ahead of her.

Unless she was in a fatal car accident.

Or she tripped and fell and instead of just some broken limbs, it was her neck or her head.

Or she injured herself around Edward and he couldn’t resist the call of her blood, so easily available.

What if she trusted the wrong person with her heart and it only resulted in heartache and pain?

The truth of human life was that it was unpredictable. Murderers lived well into old age. Children were lost to illness and injury. What if Bella was preyed upon by the kind of men that Edward had killed during his rebellious absence?

“You’re right,” I sighed. “I am taking away her ability to choose by making this decision myself. But it’s also unfair to her to worry that something will take her before her natural time and make a decision based on that.”

“It’s a thin line to toe, darling,” Esme commiserated. “But you only talk about the worst case scenarios of this situation. What if she does want to be with you, forever? What if she doesn’t resent becoming like us? What if -and you don’t have to answer, just think about it -what if you two spend eternity together and if death finally takes you, you will have that eternity as well? What if you could be happy? Truly, wholly happy with the woman you love by your side?”

An eternity with Bella?

An eternity reading with her, sharing the deepest parts of souls with one another, spending our nights wrapped in the intimate acts of adoration, laughing over her antics with the other members of our family. The possibilities spread before me in a sea of blissful existence because of her.

With her.

“You don’t have to change your mind, Carlisle,” Esme said softly, seeming to sense the shifting emotions roiling inside me, “but make sure that if you are going to choose to deny yourself and Bella what you both so earnestly crave, that you are doing it honestly.” I pulled her into a hug, holding onto her like I was afraid I was going to be washed out to sea.

“Thank you, Esme,” I rasped out. She laughed softly.

“I just want you to be happy. We all do, Carlisle. But being happy on your terms is my preference.” I continued to hold her, my thoughts flying in all directions like they had been upended by a tornado.

“Ahem,” I heard Edward say from the theater room, speaking below Bella’s register, “you can stop holding my wife now.” His annoyance was obvious and I smiled to myself.

“And why she ever chose you will forever confound me,” I replied and Esme laughed deeply as she stepped out of my arms.

“The choices were between me and you,” he replied. “I think she chose the better option.” I laughed loudly and she rolled her eyes affectionately before she returned to the dining room while I got to work on the dishes.

“Anyone want to play a game of poker,” Emmett offered.

“I think that’s gotten you into enough trouble,” I chided lowly but he just laughed.

“What’s the matter, Bella? Afraid it was just a lucky chance the last time,” he taunted.

“You know, Emmett, I didn’t take you for a masoch*st. Are you really so eager to have your ass handed to you and be publicly humiliated so soon after the last time,” Bella asked breezily and I chuckled. I wondered if I’d ever be able to tell her that it thrilled me to hear her giving it back to Emmett as good as he gave it.

“Jokes on you, Bella. I can't be humiliated.”

“So, you won’t mind if I send this to the whole school, then,” she asked cheekily. I heard Emmett get out of his chair and then the sounds of wrestling.

“Be careful, Emmett,” I warned him and he stopped.

“I missed the last game,” Edward said, smoothly stepping in. “I’d love to see if you could fool me,” he speculated.

“Try me,” Bella replied gamely. “The winner gets to pick a dare for the loser.” They all came out of the theater room to settle in the dining room, where the table was big enough to accomodate all of them.

“How do we determine the winner and the loser?”

“It’s whoever shows. Worst hand is loser, best hand is winner,” she explained. “You going to play, Rose?”

“I’ll try my luck. It sucks playing with Edward, though.”

“Is he really good or something?”

“It’s like he’s reading your freaking mind,” Rose muttered. Edward laughed heartily at the joke and I shook my head exasperatedly.

“Well, I look forward to the challenge then,” Bella said cheerfully.

“You’re probably the only one who might be able to beat him fairly,” Jasper said. “He always complains about how hard it is to read you.”

“Why don’t you all just tell her what we are,” I grumbled. I heard Edward open his mouth. “Do it and I will end you,” I promised. His mouth closed with an audible snap and I smirked.

“Hey Esme, do you want to play poker with us,” Bella asked Esme when they found her in the dining room, having finished putting the things from dinner away.

“Is this a wild thing teenagers are doing these days,” she asked with a laugh.

“I’d hardly call it wild,” Emmett reasoned.

“Emmett, you literally showed everyone at this table your twig and berries at dinner,” she said flatly.

“Excuse me but if anything it’s a tree trunk and boulders,” he insisted.

“Can we please talk about anything but Emmett’s marshmallow mateys,” Bella complained.

“Agreed,” I said.

“I’m going to go help Carlisle with the dishes, but thank you for the offer.” They settled in at the table, Alice appearing with the cards and chips. She dealt out the cards and they began playing, raising the stakes and calling. Jasper folded first, followed by Alice. Esme and I cleaned up the dishes and kitchen, working in companionable silence while listening to the antics in the other room. Emmett issued insults and challenges frequently while Rosalie called him an idiot. Bella occasionally replied in kind, but mostly kept quiet. Her heart rate remained steady and I wanted to shower her in praise. Rose folded next and then it was just Emmett, Edward and Bella. Emmett only made it one more hand before he folded as well until Bella and Edward were left to reveal their cards.

“Ladies first,” Edward said with exaggerated politeness.

“Too bad Emmett folded then,” Bella teased and I could hear Emmett muttering petulantly. “Three of a kind,” she announced, laying her cards on the table.

“I folded when you only had three of a kind,” Emmett exclaimed in outrage. “I had a freaking full house!”

“Don’t take it so personally, Emmett. A lot of guys have issues with performance anxiety,” Bella soothed teasingly. “Now, Edward, did you beat me or not?” Edward sighed.

“I was really hoping you would do better. Flush,” he said sadly, laying his cards on the table. Emmett began ranting again, lamenting his decision to fold when he would have beaten Edward and taken the game. “So I get to dare you,” he asked Bella.

“Yep. Hope you think up something better than Emmett.”

“Oh, I already know what I’m going to do. I dare you to kiss my dad.” The room went silent.

That’s it. I am going to rip you to pieces slowly and make you watch as I set fire to each bit and it turns to ash, you interfering, meddlesome bastard, I screamed at him in my head.

“Excuse me but there are rules,” Bella choked out. Her heart was hammering in her chest and I knew without even seeing her that she was probably red as a tomato. “No illegal dares. Right, guys,” she asked the room in general.

“Nothing illegal my bare, tight ass,” Emmett said. “Your dad literally arrested me at dinner.”

“Yeah but not for real,” she cried, panic edging her voice now. My anger doubled as I heard her distress.

Change it, I commanded Edward. I might have wanted to kiss her like the world was ending but not like this.

“Actually, it is illegal,” Alice chimed in helpfully and I growled at her. “That’s why it worked. You and I looked it up. So I think it is safe to say that isn’t an established rule.”

“Seriously, Alice,” Bella asked. “Just gonna throw me under the bus like that?”

“Is the thought of having to kiss my very attractive father so repugnant to you,” Edward asked dryly.

“You mean besides, of course, that it could land him in jail and registered as a sex offender for the rest of his life? Lead to him losing his medical license? Putting him in a position that affects my ability to ever show my face in this house again when I either assault him against his will or he has to go out of his way to avoid me because he thinks I’m some gold digging piece of jailbait?”

“Why do you care if he thinks that,” Rosalie asked and I felt a new sense of betrayal from my thus far neutral daughter

“I don’t give a damn what he thinks,” Bella tried to assure them.

“Please, Bella, you give so many damns they’re visible from space,” Jasper countered. “The real question is who’s opinion is it that you really care about?” I dried my hands off angrily, prepared to march in there and remove her from their interrogation but her soft voice stopped me.

“You guys are my best friends,” she muttered. “Nothing matters more than that.” Silence filled the house as everyone focused on what she said.

“Bella,” Jasper murmured, “we’re not children. We wouldn’t begrudge you for your feelings.”

“You don’t think it’s weird,” Bella whispered self-consciously.

“It would actually be weirder if you didn’t like Carlisle,” Rosalie pointed out and her siblings murmured in agreement.

“But we’re the same age,” Bella argued half-heartedly. They laughed and I let out my own huff of amusem*nt. They weren’t and that was my problem.

“We aren’t really territorial like most teenagers,” Alice clarified. “We just want to see Carlisle with someone who makes him happy.”

“You guys realize how abnormal this is, right,” Bella said, sounding more than a little overwhelmed. “Besides, you act like he wouldn’t be mortified if I even tried something like that.” I recalled our stolen moment after her father had left.

Did she not realize the power she had over me? Had she not seen the obvious desire for her as our faces grew closer?

“Don’t sell yourself short, Swan,” Emmett reassured her. I decided to put an end to this conversation completely. I walked out of the kitchen and stopped in the doorway of the dining room. They were all crowded around Bella. Alice had a hand on hers while Edward had put his arm around her shoulders. I barely resisted the urge to tear it off and beat him with it.

“Edward,” I said lightly, trying to hide any sign that I was privy to this private moment. Bella whipped around in her seat to face me. Her eyes were shiny with unshed tears and her face drained as soon as she saw me, presumably worried I had overheard their conversation. “Could you come help me take the trash out,” I asked. Edward nodded and stood up, giving Bella a reassuring squeeze to the shoulder that had my hands twitching. He followed me to the kitchen where we grabbed the trash bags and went out the back door, dumping them in a bi before I gestured for him to follow me. I took off into the trees, Edward keeping pace beside me as we raced through the darkness away from the house enough that Bella wouldn't be able to see or hear us but close enough that it wouldn’t take a suspiciously long time to return. I stopped next to a fallen tree trunk leaning against its solid neighbors.

“This ends now,” I snapped harshly. “You have really gone too far this time. I was content to live with your badgering but this is past acceptable! Do you realize what you’ve done?” He stood across from me, arms crossed, his face the picture of apathy.

“Eliminated Bella’s fear of judgement from her friends for having romantic feelings for their father,” he asked blandly and I snarled, shoving him into the tree behind him. It cracked and groaned from the blow.

“I have no choice but to break her heart now,” I screamed at him. “I have to reject her when she tries to execute this thoughtless, ridiculous dare you’ve challenged her with and that will break her heart! Because you’ve given her false hope!” His face morphed into angry incredulity.

“I gave her false hope? She’s not an idiot, Carlisle! She knows that there is something there between you! Why do you think her heart jumps around you? Why do you think she reacts so viscerally to your touch? She was ready to put it all on the line and kiss you back today, our opinions be damned! She loves you and you’re so wrapped up in possible outcomes that you don’t even realize that it’s too late for her! You talk about no choice but that is complete and utter sh*t. You have a choice! You realized that earlier when you talked to Esme. You know that you two could be blissfully happy together but you’re so afraid of getting hurt that you’re willing to hurt the both of you to try and protect yourself from some nonsensical outcome that will literally never happen! Because Alice has looked into the future, at every possibility and not a single one ends with her walking away from you! You’re so willing to stop this before it can even happen but it’s already happening. Bella will never be happy without you. The futures that Alice sees when she looks now, with your mind made up, is Bella trying valiantly to love someone, anyone the way she loved you but no one makes her feel that way. She spends her life in an empty loop of moving from relationship to relationship, left with nothing but disappointment and a reminder that she’s not enough for anyone because she wasn’t enough for the only man that mattered.” His words were like knives, each stabbing me until I felt battered and broken. The thought of Bella feeling the way he described crippled me with anguish and also made me so mad, I was ready to murder anyone who hurt her.

“I so wish, Carlisle, that you knew that none of us will ever leave you. She won’t leave you. You two are bound. I know that you never experienced the way the mating bond works before but it’s not optional and certainly not breakable. That is why so many of our kind either go mad or kill themselves when they lose a mate. It’s literally like losing half of yourself. Whether you admit it or not, that is what is happening between you and Bella. So please stop hurting her and yourself by pretending it’s something tawdry. It is the most precious gift.” I stared into the trees, my stomach churning because I knew he was right. I felt the shift in my universe when I met her. But, like Bella’s feelings of inadequacy, I was also plagued by my own demons that assured me that I didn’t deserve her and that she would realize that once the initial bliss of new love dissipated.

“Just try,” he pleaded with me, listening as I wrestled with myself.

“She’s underage,” I reminded him, even as my mind conjured the possibilities of letting myself fall into her.

“Less than a year until she’s old enough. Maybe just keep it to yourselves for now. Enjoy being able to build intimacy without the court of public opinion interfering.” I sighed, rubbing my hands over my face roughly. He grabbed me in a tight hug. “I love you both so much,” he said hoarsely. “I just want you both to be happy.” I squeezed him back before releasing him. Then I swung my fist back and slammed it into his cheek bone.

“That’s for making her so uncomfortable,” I chastised him before taking off back to the house. I heard him mutter something behind me before he followed. We walked through the back door a moment later. I could hear Rose and Emmett in their bedroom, Emmett lamenting the fact that they wouldn’t be able to engage in enthusiastic and loud marital relationships unless they left the house. “What’s going on,” I asked Edward as we walked from the kitchen to the family room. Bella and Esme were coming down the stairs from his and Esme’s room.

“Charlie called and asked if Bella could stay here tonight. He said that he was going to be staying late and didn’t want her home alone.” I frowned, concern nagging at my thoughts, wondering if Bella was in danger. “I’m sure he just feels more comfortable knowing she has someone with her,” Edward reassured me but I still felt edgy about his caution. Esme and Bella finally reached us and I smiled at her warmly. She smiled shyly back at me as they walked toward us. She was wearing a pair of soft pajama pants and a Dartmouth shirt that looked suspiciously like mine from the last time I had taught as a professor there.

“Hope you don’t mind putting up with me a bit longer,” she said nervously, finally stopping in front of me. I breathed in deeply and knew at once the shirt was mine as her floral, fruity smell mixed with mine. It felt like a jolt to my system, causing parts that never saw much use to stir in interest. Edward gave a low cough that reigned me back in.

Barely.

“Is that my shirt,” was all I managed to choke out. She looked down in surprise and examined the garment in question, fiddling with the hem.

“Maybe? Alice gave me clothes but the pants didn’t fit so Esme got me a pair of hers. I can find something else,” she offered before trailing off and biting her lip. The gesture nearly obliterated my modicum of control.

“No,” I said quickly and she blushed. “No need to go through all that trouble. Besides it looks better on you,” I complimented.

“That’s not even possible,” she mumbled and I chuckled.

“It very much is,” I assured her. Edward cleared his throat loudly.

“Well, it’s been a super long day. I’m going to go to bed now,” he said. “Goodnight, Bella. Night, Carlisle.” He walked up the stairs, whistling ‘Kiss the Girl’ as he went.

“He’s annoying,” Bella said flatly. I threw back my head and laughed.

“You don’t know the half of it,” I assured her and she grinned.

“You should ground him,” she suggested gleefully.

“Like that’s ever worked,” Esme said with a snort. “However, he is onto something. I’m going to head to bed too.”

“Thank you again for dinner,” Bella said. “And for the pants.” Esme waved her off.

“It was nothing. Sleep well, dear. Don’t let Carlisle keep you up too late; he’s a closet night owl.” She winked and Bella chuckled, tossing me a look over her shoulder.

“We’ll probably just stay up plotting ways to make Edward’s life miserable,” she said with a mischievous grin. It felt like my heart was trying to mimic what hers had done earlier, stuttering in my chest. Esme laughed and headed up the stairs with a final wave. I listened for Alice and Jasper but they had already sequestered themselves in their room, talking too low to understand.

“Where did Alice say you were sleeping,” I asked Bella, gesturing for her to sit. She flopped onto the couch, tossing her feet up. I sat at the opposite end, unable to take my eyes off her, the emerald shirt bringing out the red in her brunette hair.

She was breathtaking.

“She didn’t. But I’ll just take the couch.” I shook my head.

“It’s like I didn’t raise any of you with manners,” I muttered to the others in the house. “Absolutely not,” I said. “You can take my bed.” She froze and were it not for the pink rising on her skin, I would almost take her for one of us.

“I couldn’t do that,” she said shakily. “Where would you sleep?”

“I will take the couch. Or maybe I’ll go crawl in with Edward and spend the whole night kicking him.” She smiled at my suggestion while Edward booed from his room.

I didn’t ask for your opinion, thank you.

“Edward probably snores. And I definitely can’t take your bed and condemn you to the couch.”

“It’s non-negotiable,” I told her firmly. “I wouldn’t be able to sleep a wink knowing that I left you down here to potentially be a victim of Emmett's bouts of sleep gaming.” She raised an eyebrow at me.

“Does he really do that or are you just trying to convince me not to argue?”

“Both.” She laughed lightly.

“Fine,” she said with an exaggerated eye roll. “I don’t want to argue with you. You already get enough practice with Edward.”

Wasn’t that an understatement.

I stood offering her a hand to help pull herself up too. She took it and the room felt charged, like lightning waiting to strike.

“Let me show you where you’ll be sleeping,” I said dazedly and led her up the stairs to the third floor. “Rose and Emmett are on the second floor with Alice and Jasper. Edward and Esme are the floor above us. That’s my study,” I pointed to a dark wood panel door across from the door we were in front of, “ and this is my room.” I opened the door and walked inside. She followed, her eyes taking in every detail of the room. It was tasteful, like everything Esme did. A four poster king sized bed dominated the side of the room opposite us, fluffy bedding covering it in inviting plushness. The north wall was all windows like the family room. A plush, oversized couch was against the wall closest to us, the door to the bathroom on the side opposite.

“It’s beautiful,” she hummed, stepping further in.

“Esme is a wonderful decorator,” I agreed. She sat on the couch, running her hands over the fabric.

I’d never wanted to be a couch until that moment.

“Are you sure about it,” she asked worriedly.

“I’m positive,” I said, sitting next to her. “If my children had any manners, they’d have offered the bed to you already.”

“Well, what can you expect? They are just demon spawn,” she said mournfully and I laughed.

“I don’t know. They used to be stand up, productive members of society before you came around,” I teased.

“I have a hard time believing that Emmett and Edward were ever stand-up community members… ever.” I chuckled softly.

“Well, there was less nudity, I know that much.” We sat, amused and lost in our own memories of the day. “I’d better let you get to bed. Executing a perfectly planned prank must be exhausting.”

“It really is.”

“I’d watch out for Emmett though. He gets vengeance in the strangest -and usually most inconveniencing -ways.”

“You’re not going to protect me,” she asked, hand to her chest as she feigned shock.

“Well I could put him back up for adoption,” I contemplated.

“I wouldn’t wish Emmett on anyone else. Especially since I actually love the big teddy bear. He’s sweet.” I wanted to beg her to say the same words to me but I smiled instead.

“He’s got a heart of gold. It’s just hidden by the mentality of a three year old.” She nodded and stood up. “Anyway, off to bed with you.” She hesitated and then shook her head.

“Only if you sleep on this couch so that I’m not kicking you out of your bed and your room.” I raised an eyebrow at her.

“How do you know that I don’t snore?” She grinned.

“I sincerely hope you do, Carlisle Cullen. I’m looking for flaws and have only come up empty handed.” I shook my head at her.

“Fine. You asked for it though. I’m going to snore as loud as I can all night long.” She held a hand out to me and I took it, wrapping my cold fingers around her warm ones and reveling in the almost electrical buzz happening beneath my skin. She let go of my hand and ambled over to the bed. She pulled a pillow off, tossing it at me. I caught it deftly and grabbed a blanket that was thrown over the corner of the couch. She let out a huge yawn as she crawled into the big bed, settling under the covers in the middle.

“This bed is like a marshmallow,” she said sleepily.

“Got to sleep, Bella,” I ordered gently.

“Goodnight, Carlisle,” she said quietly, staring at me from the useless prop I had ignored my entire life.

How I longed to use it now.

“Sweet dreams,” I said softly as I laid down on the couch, pulling the blanket over me and waiting for her to fall asleep.

It didn’t take long but even after she slipped away into a state of unconsciousness, I couldn’t bear to leave. I changed into some pajamas to keep up appearances, pulled out a medical journal and began to read up on some of the latest studies.

“Carlisle,” Bella said, around three in the morning and I set my magazine down in surprise. I looked over at the bed but Bella’s eyes were still closed, her breathing deep and even.

She talked in her sleep.

I found the habit almost painfully endearing.

I watched as her face scrunched up slightly.

“Don’t know what to do,” she muttered, the skin between her brows puckered. I waited, poised to calm her if needed but her face smoothed out and she continued to sleep quietly. “Mom,” she breathed a little while later and my heart squeezed in sympathy for her. “No, Mom,” she said, her voice tight and her heartbeat accelerating slightly. “Please, Mom, don’t go,” she begged. I sat up, concerned. “No, Mom, please. I need you.” Tears slipped from her closed eyes and down her face. I was at her side instantly, gently wiping the tears away.

“Bella,” I murmured. A sob caught in her throat and I shook her again. “Bella.” Her eyes opened slowly, clouded with tears.

“Carlisle,” she said softly. Her crying hadn’t subsided and she looked around me to the couch and back again. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.” I sat on the edge of the bed, pulling her closer and rubbing soothing patterns on her arm with my thumb.

“Are you okay,” I asked her softly. Her tears doubled their efforts and she began to sob in earnest.

“No,” she said through her tears.

“Come here,” I said gently, lifting her and moving her over in the bed. I crawled in next to her, pulling the down comforter over the both of us. She pulled my arm up over her head and settled herself into my shoulder, holding me tightly with one arm. “Was it your mom,” I asked, running my fingers through her silky hair slowly.

“Yes,” she whispered and tears still graced her cheeks. “I was trying to talk to her but she started to disappear and I couldn’t stop her.” She squeezed me and I pulled her closer, settling her more firmly against me.

“I’m sorry.” We laid in silence while I searched for the right thing to say. “I know she would have never left you willingly,” I finally murmured.

“I know,” she sighed tiredly, eyes drifting closed. “It just felt so real. Like I was losing her all over again.” I moved my hand up to her cheek, wiping away the errant tears with my thumb and gazing down at her.

“I’ve got you,” I promised. “Everything is going to be okay.” She looked up at me sadly and I brushed my hand over her cheek again. Her gaze shifted from my eyes to my mouth and back up again. Heat crept over me, burning me where our bodies met. I attempted to rally my last bit of rational thought, reminding myself of her precarious emotional state and sleep fogged state. I started to pull away from her but she grabbed me tighter.

“Wait, don’t go. Please,” she pleaded. I stopped, holding her gaze to ensure she was okay with this and moved back into my spot. “Thank you,” she whispered. I gently rubbed my fingertips along her arm and she sighed contentedly.

“Carlisle,” asked quietly.

“Yes, sweetheart?” She hesitated and I looked down at her. She shifted to look at me.

“What did you say to me earlier? That thing you said in French: what does it mean?” I took a deep breath, debating the wisdom of telling her what I had said. “Please tell me,” she pressed.

“I don’t know if I should,” I murmured softly. Her eyes grew sad.

“Because you don’t want to encourage me,” she asked, looking down. I lifted her chin gently, forcing her eyes to meet mine.

“Mostly because I feel like you’ve been pushed toward me and I don’t want to make you feel like I’m trying to manipulate you as well.”

“You’d never do that.” Her voice was full of conviction.

“Bella, I’m… so much older than you. I come with kids and… complications. You could do so much better than an old man like me.” She gazed at me.

“Please tell me,” she asked again. I waited, caressing the curve of her jaw with my eyes.

“You are everything,” I breathed and her own breathing grew shallower. I stopped there, compromising.

“There was more,” she urged. I sighed, grabbing her hand on my chest and intertwining my fingers with hers.

“Not telling you how I feel is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.” I felt overly sensitive, a foreign fluttering in my lower abdomen. She moved closer to me but I pressed a hand to her lips, ignoring the pleasure that tingled from the back of my neck down my spine at the contact. “Don’t,” I whispered and I immediately saw the rejection reflected in her eyes. “I know that Edward dared you to but you don’t have to do it. There’s no obligation.” She grabbed my hand and pulled it away from her face slowly, her fingers tangling with mine.

“Do you really think that I’d only kiss you because I felt obligated to?” I looked away from her. She watched me for a moment and then lifted our hands and pressed a delicate kiss to the back of my hand. It was an innocent gesture but her lips felt heavenly against my skin, tingling spreading from their point of contact down my arm directly to my heart. “There. Dare complete.”

“I don’t think that's quite what Edward meant,” I argued breathlessly. She smiled.

“Then he should have been more specific,” she said, eyes bright. I laughed softly, squeezing her hand in mine.

“I don’t know that he’ll agree with you. I’m sure he meant for you to-” She moved before I could finish and I didn’t stop her, too far gone to stop what had started. She pressed her lips to mine forcefully and for just a moment, my brain seemed to short circuit and I froze. Her lips moved over mine eagerly while I was stuck, frozen. I could feel when self-consciousness hit her because she started to slow down, moving to pull away from me. I let go of her hand and weaved my fingers into her hair, cupping her jaw. I moved my lips against hers insistently. I gently gripped her waist and used that arm to pull her as close as possible without hurting her. She sucked my bottom lip between hers and I gasped. I gripped her neck and tilted her head back, brushing down her jaw to the elegant column of her throat, greedily drinking in the heady mix of my scent and hers. She moaned and the vibrations moved through my lips straight to my groin.

“Bella,” I gasped as sensations assaulted me. She plunged her hand into my hair and gripped it tightly, sending waves of pleasure over my skin. I rested my lips against where her artery pulsed under her delicate skin, breathing her in where it was the strongest. “Do you have any idea what you do to me,” I breathed against her skin and she shuddered, goosebumps erupting over her skin.

“Not nearly what you do to me,” she sighed. I pulled back, looking into her eyes, dark with need.

“Do you really think I’m so unaffected by you,” I asked her earnestly, smoothing my hands over her face and hair. She blushed prettily and looked away, embarrassed. “Bella Swan, you are perfect. Really,” I assured her as she ducked her head. I gently lifted her face to see the doubt swirling in her eyes.

“I’m not,” she whispered. “I’ll probably wake up and this will have been a dream. You’ll be asleep on the couch and I’ll still be nothing more than the girl your kids took pity on and befriended.” I brushed my thumb under her eye, wiping the errant tear away as she spoke.

“You have never been just the friend of my children,” I emphasized. “There’s been something about you from the start. I’ve grown to like you more than I planned to allow myself to. You. Are. Breathtaking.” I pressed a kiss to her forehead and looked back down at her. “Why are you looking at me like that?” Her mouth had quirked into a half smile.

“You’ve got to stop doing that,” she whispered. I frowned.

“Kissing your forehead?”

“No, saying things that make me want to kiss you senseless.” I grinned.

“Everything you do makes me senseless,” I breathed against her lips as I leaned in to her. I brushed my lips over hers slowly but the fire that consumed me still raged like it had when we had kissed passionately before. Her mouth moved against mine, slow and tender, like we had all eternity to this. I deepened the kiss, sliding my tongue into her open mouth and explored her, tasting her eagerly. Everything about her was sweet from the way she smelled to her tongue tangling with mine for dominance.

We kissed for minutes or maybe even days. I was struggling to form coherent thoughts with her so close, feeling like our souls were connecting and embracing every time our lips met. I finally pulled back slowly, pressing chaste kisses to her lips with less and less frequency.

“It’s late,” I murmured, pressing my lips to her forehead. “You should get some sleep.” She hummed contentedly.

“But I like kissing you,” she said through a yawn. I smiled.

“I very much like kissing you, too. Get some rest.” She snuggled into my chest, resting her arm on my chest and curling a leg over mine. I traced lazy patterns on her arm while I listened to her heart slow and her breathing start to even out

“Carlisle,” she whispered, voice thick with sleep.

“Yes, Bella?”

“Not telling you how I feel is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, too.”

Chapter 18: Survivor

Chapter Text

Sorry this one took a whole week. Bella and Carlisle and I were arguing about what happens next (now that they've thrown off my master plan) and then Bella went and got Edward involved and I pretty much got ganged up on. Some of this will look familiar as it is from the book (fun fact: my copy is in storage right now but I was lucky enough to have been gifted Life and Death so this chapter could be saved!). Also, I know that some of you are worried about the age thing. Relax, guys. I got this. Also, a HUGE thank you to MandaRinne who not only demanded this story (although her request was a lot less angst filled) but who tells me when I'm being stupid.

The song for this chapter is Survivor by 2WEI.

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Twitter: teamdemonmonkey
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Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Eighteen: Survivor

BPOV

When I woke up the next morning, I was confused at first. I glanced around Carlisle’s bedroom in confusion before the events of the night came crashing back.

It was empty.

I noticed the vacant couch and open -empty -bathroom. I fell back against the pillows and something crinkled and poked me in the shoulder. I grabbed the offending item and found a folded paper with my name written beautifully. I unfolded it, my hands shaking slightly.

Bella,

I’m sorry to miss you this morning but I was called in for emergency surgery. I would love to see you later, if you’d permit me.

Don’t let my children hassle you. You have my permission to ground each of them for eternity.

Yours,

Carlisle

My heart pounded in my chest as I read and re-read his words.

Even his penmanship was beautiful.

Weren’t doctors supposed to have terrible handwriting?

I closed my eyes, losing myself in memories of last night. His hands gently cradling my head while he kissed me languidly, like he had all the time in the world to memorize me down to the last detail. It had been better than any fantasy I had ever imagined. He hadn’t made any declarations to me but at the same time, he’d pretty much told me that he felt as strongly about me as I felt for him.

A knock at the door interrupted my reminiscing and I jumped.

“Bella,” asked Alice loudly. “Are you up?”

“Yeah, come on in,” I called out, well aware that my entire body felt like it had flushed.

I kissed her dad last night!

She opened the door and ran to hop onto the bed, perfectly graceful and more coordinated than I could ever hope to be.

“Morning, sleepyhead! Charlie called and asked if we could give you a ride home before school so you could change and grab your truck. He said he had to get in early since it snowed a little and the roads got icy last night. It usually means more accidents because people think they can drive like usual.” I wondered when he’d gotten home last night. It had been pretty late when he called and I’d already been thinking of asking Alice to drive me home.

“That’d be great. I’ll change and we can go.” Her face fell dramatically.

“Esme put your clothes in the washing machine last night and forgot to switch them over,” she admitted apologetically. “They’re still wet. You’ll have to wear those home and change.” I looked down at Carlisle’s shirt and then back up at her, my eyes narrowing suspiciously. She just smiled at me serenely and I wondered if any of the kids knew what had happened last night?

Surely Carlisle hadn’t said anything.

Right?

I shrugged, still suspicious. She and Edward had been sneaky and deceptive and I found myself questioning anything involving Carlisle and myself when they were involved.

“Okay. Let’s go.” She beamed and hopped off the bed. I followed her downstairs, running into Edward in his pajamas at the bottom of the stairs.

“Well, good morning,” he said with an unnaturally bright smile on his face. “Did you sleep okay last night? When did you and Carlisle finally get to bed,” he asked suggestively, waggling his eyebrows at me and I moved past him, pretending I couldn’t feel the telltale blush on my cheeks.

“You’re grounded,” I said flatly.

“You’re not my mom,” he argued.

“Nope but Carlisle gave me permission to punish you. So I hope you don’t have plans anytime soon because you're under house arrest.” He stared after me as I followed Alice to the door to put on my shoes and jacket.

“I take it back. I don’t like you and my dad together.” I laughed and gave him my sweetest smile.

“Should have thought of that before, buster.” I followed Alice out to Edward’s car and we headed down the drive towards my house.

When we pulled up, I hopped out.

“Want me to wait for you,” Alice asked.

“No, I’m going to drive. I might stop and see Charlie after school. See you at school!” I headed up the walk as she drove away. When I got inside and up to my room, I grabbed a sweater and some jeans. I began to change but paused when I pulled the t-shirt off my head and buried my face in it, inhaling deeply.

I needed to figure out what cologne Carlisle used and buy a bottle.

So I could smell it and think of him.

Like a creeper.

The man had no business walking around looking like that and smelling like aged oak barrels, rich whiskey and books.

I shook myself out of my thoughts and finished changing, stuffing Carlisle’s shirt under my pillow.

I should at least wash it before returning it. That was only polite.

I grabbed my backpack and shoes, stopping in the kitchen to grab an apple and biting into it while making my way to my truck. I hopped in and drove to school, going slower than my usual snail pace in case there was black ice on the roads. I pulled into the school and parked. I hopped out, walking to the front of my car and looking down at the tire. There was a set of chains wrapped around it. I checked the other three tires and felt my eyes get hot.

Charlie had put chains on my tires. I don’t know when he got home but I couldn’t imagine he’d gotten nearly enough sleep. And yet, he’d taken the time this morning to make sure that I would make it to school safely. The gesture touched me deeply and I wiped my eyes gingerly before anyone could see and wonder what was wrong with me. I looked up and around, checking to see if anyone noticed. My gaze met Edward’s several cars away and he was staring at me, brow furrowed in concern. I shook my head with an eye roll, dreading having to explain that I was emotional over snow chains.

I was standing by the back corner of the truck, trying to compose myself when I heard a strange sound. It was a high-pitched screech, and almost as soon as I registered it, the sound was already painfully loud. I looked up, startled.

I saw several things simultaneously. Nothing was moving in slow motion, the way it does in the movies. Instead, the adrenaline rush seemed to make my brain work faster and I was able to absorb in clear detail a few things all at once.

Edward was still standing four cars down from me, mouth open in horror. His face stood out from a sea of faces, all frozen in the same mask of shock. Also, a dark blue van was skidding, tires locked and squealing against eh brakes, spinning wildly across the ice of the parking lot. It was going to hit the back corner of my truck, and I was standing between them. I didn't’ have time to close my eyes.

Just before I heard the shattering crunch of the van folding around the truck bed, something hit me, hard, but not from the direction I was expecting. My head cracked against the icy blacktop, sending pain shooting down my neck and white spots across my vision. I felt something solid and cold pinning me to the ground. I realized I was lying on the pavement behind the tan car I’d parked next to. But I didn’t have a chance to notice anything else, because the van was still coming. It had curled gratingly around the end of the truck and, still spinning and sliding, was about to collide with me again.

“Come on!” He said the words so quickly I almost missed them, but I recognized him immediately.

Edward.

His hands shot out in front of me, and the van shuddered to a stop a foot from my face, his pale hands fitting exactly into a deep dent in the side of the van’s body.

Then his hands moved so fast they blurred. One was suddenly gripping unde the body of the van, and something was dragging me, swinging my legs around like a rag doll’s, till they hit the tire of the tan car. There was a groaning metallic thud so loud it hurt my ears, and the van settled, glass popping onto the asphalt -exactly where, a second ago, my legs had been.

It was absolutely silent for one long second. Then the screaming started. In the abrupt chaos, I could hear more than one person shouting my name.

“Bella? Are you alright,” Edward’s frantic voice said in my ear.

“M-my head,” I whimpered as the aching intensified with the screaming.

“Just lay here. Carlisle will get you all fixed up,” he promised me.

“How in the…” I trailed off, trying to clear my head, get my bearings. “How did you get over here so fast?” He frowned at me.

“I was standing next to you,” he said seriously. I pushed against him, but I couldn’t even budge his arm. He took the hint though and climbed off me gently, sitting next to me so I could still look at him without moving. I noted his concerned, innocent expression and tried to remember what we had been talking about.

Then they found us; a crowd of people with tears streaming down their faces, shouting at each other, shouting at us.

“Don’t move,” someone instructed.

“Get Tyler out of the van,” someone else shouted. There was a flurry of activity around us that was making my head spin more. I tried to get up but Edward’s hand pushed me back down.

“Just wait for help.”

“But it’s cold,” I complained. He laughed and I cringed as the sound rang around my head like the clashing of symbols.

“Sorry,” he apologized, concern taking over his features again.

“You were over there,” I suddenly remembered. His frown deepened. “You were by your car.”

“No. I wasn’t,” he said lowly.

“I saw you.” Everything around us was confusion. My head throbbed like it might just burst into a million pieces. I could hear the lower voices of adults arriving. But I stubbornly held onto this argument.

“Bella, I was standing with you and I pulled you out of the way.”

He stared at me, ochre eyes flashing with… something.

My head hurt so much.

“That’s’ not what happened,” I said weakly.

“Please, Bella.”

“Why,” I asked.

“Trust me,” he pleaded. I could hear sirens now, the sounds intensifying the pain in my head.

“Will you explain everything to me later?”

“For Carlisle,” he asked quietly and I sighed.

“Fine,” I mumbled, unable to process the conversation any further with the wailing of the sirens drowning out all thought.

It took six EMTs and two teachers to shift the van far enough away from us to bring the stretchers in. Edward insisted he hadn’t been touched and told them I’d hit my head. He threw around words like concussion and hemorrhage. They strapped a neck brace on and loaded me onto a stretcher while the whole school watched. I was loaded into the back while Edward conned a seat in the front of the ambulance. Only a few minutes into the swaying of the ambulance’s journey to Forks hospital, I felt the swirling in my head get worse and the sensation was mirrored in my stomach. I choked out a request for a bag and an EMT helped me lean over and vomit into a blue emesis bag. I laid back, tears streaming down my face. I reached up to wipe them away and gasped as white hot pain shot up my arm.

“My wrist,” I cried out and the EMT began to probe gently, each painful prod sending more pain up my arm and into my fingertips.

“I think you broke it,” he said. “We’ll have them get xrays when we get there.” I sagged, brain unable to process anything more that he was saying as we pulled up to the emergency entrance. He and the other EMT unloaded me and wheeled me through the ER doors. Charlie was waiting on the other side, face drawn with anxiety.

“Bella,” he yelled in panic when he saw me. I winced at the sudden noise and he ran to my side, taking my hand gently.

“I’ll be okay, Dad,” I murmured, attempting to reassure him. He rounded on the nearest EMT to get a full report but I tuned them out, considering the jumble of absurd images churning in my brain.

Things that were impossible.

When they’d lifted the van away from us, I saw the deep dent in the tan car’s bumper.

A very distinct dent that fit the broad shape of Edward’s shoulders.

As if he’d braced himself against the car with enough force to damage the frame.

And then there had been his family, standing in the distance. They’d all been horrified but I couldn’t miss the disapproval on any of their faces.

I remembered the sensation of almost flying through the air, the hard mass that had pinned me to the ground.

Edward’s hand under the frame of the van, like he was holding it off the ground.

I tried to think of a logical explanation of what I had seen. All I could come up with was a psychotic episode.

It was bound to happen eventually.

They transferred me into a bed, the curtains drawn on one side but open to the rest of the floor on the other two. Nurses and aides came and went, checking my vitals and asking me questions. I looked around for Edward awkwardly but didn’t see him anywhere. Charlie came up to my bedside and patted my head softly.

“I have to go to the school to do a report on the accident. Edward promised to stay with you until I get back.”

“Okay, Dad,” I said softly and he smiled, eyes bright.

“I’m glad you weren’t hurt worse, Bells.” He kissed the crown of my head and turned to leave.

“He, Dad,” I said a little louder to get his attention. He turned back to me. “Thanks for putting snow chains on my truck this morning.” His mouth twitched and he pursed his lips before nodding.

“No problem,” he said, voice choked before he walked away briskly out the ER doors. I closed my eyes against the bright lights. I heard as they wheeled in someone else next to me.

“Oh my god, Bella! Is she dead,” I heard a frantic voice ask and I opened my eyes to see Tyler Crowley from my Government class staring at me in horror from the bed next to mine. He looked awful, cuts on his head and completely shaken.

“I’m not dead,” I said tiredly.

I’d kill for a nap though.

“I thought I was going to kill you! I was going too fast and I hit the ice wrong.” He winced as a nurse started dabbing at the cuts on his face.

“Don’t worry about it; you missed me.”

“How did you get out of the way so fast? You were there and then you were gone…”

“Oh, um, Edward pulled me out of the way. He was standing next to me.”

“Edward? I didn’t even see him… wow, it was all so fast, I guess. Is he okay?”

“Yeah. He’s around here somewhere.”

I knew I wasn’t crazy. Tyler hadn’t seen Edward anywhere near me.

They wheeled me away to get an xray of my head and wrist. I laid back and just closed my eyes, exhaustion tugging at me. The nurses kept coming in to wake me up until a doctor came to see me. Tyler repeatedly apologized until the pain in my head was reaching intolerable levels.

“Is she sleeping,” a familiar voice asked but I didn’t open my eyes.

“I feel like I’m being stabbed,” I complained to him.

“How do you even know what being stabbed feels like?”

“I think I actually hate you,” I grumbled as the sound of the curtain closingbetween my bed and Tyler's met my sensitive ears.

“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that. Especially when I brought you something to make you feel better,” he singsonged at me.

“What would that be?”

“Bella?” I opened my eyes and turned my head slightly to see Carlisle standing by the foot of my bed, chart in hand and gorgeous face blank but I could see oceans of worry and fear in his golden eyes.

“Carlisle,” I breathed and it came crashing down on me that the last time I had seen his perfect face, we’d been lying in his bed together, kissing languidly before I’d fallen asleep in his arms. I felt a sudden onslaught of emotions; embarrassment, anxiety, relief, stress, desire. He came closer, setting the chart at my feet and pulling out a penlight from his pocket.

“How do you feel,” he asked as he shined the light in my eyes. I shied away from the brightness, the feeling of stabbing seeming to come directly from the beams of light hitting my pupils.

“My eyebrows don’t hurt,” I said, attempting to gain control of myself through sarcasm. The corner of his mouth lifted and I saw his shoulders loosen in relief. He placed his cold hands to my head and I wanted to cry in relief. He probed gently, apologizing when his fingers came into contact with the tender spots and I whimpered.

“Your x rays show a pretty nasty concussion,” he said. “And your wrist is definitely broken. I’m going to have to put it in a cast. And I want to keep you overnight for observation.” I groaned and stared at the ceiling.

I hated hospitals.

“I know it hurts, but you have to stay awake,” he instructed apologetically and I looked back at him. Flashes of memory from last night flashed into my mind and I felt a telltale blush starting. He smirked slightly before grabbing my chart and writing in it. “It could have been so much worse,” he said and it almost sounded like he was reassuring himself.

“Well, I was lucky Edward was there,” I said with a scowl. Carlisle’s hand stilled for a moment before continuing.

“Thank heaven for that,” he said and my heart dropped.

He knew something.

He knew or had an idea of what had happened but wasn’t saying anything, just like his son.

“I’ll come check on you later,” he promised, eyes soft as he placed his hand over mine. It felt like heaven. He left to see Tyler and Edward sat on the edge of my bed.

“I’m really happy you’re okay,” he said.

“You owe me an explanation,” I said with a glare.

“Um, I just saved your life. I don’t owe you anything. You on the other hand have to be my slave for eternity.” I pinned him with a look, although it was hard when there were two of him. “Bella, you hit your head. Hard. I think you’re confused about what happened.”

“I’m concussed, not deranged,” I snapped.

“What do you want from me, Bella,” he asked tiredly.

“I want to know the truth. I want to know why I’m lying for you.” He flinched.

“What do you think happened?”

“You weren’t anywhere near me. Tyler didn’t see you either, so I’m not just forgetting or didn’t notice you. That van would have crushed us both but it didn’t. I saw the dents that your hands left in the side of it. You held it up so it wouldn’t crush my legs…” I trailed off, fully aware that anyone who heard would probably want me committed.

“You think I lifted a van off you,” he asked incredulously. But he was still tense.I just waited, silence filling the small space between us. “Nobody will believe that,” he said tensely.

“I’m not going to tell anyone.” He watched me intently. “Thank you,” he finally said.

“I still want to know,” I whispered.

“I… I can’t, Bella,” he said, eyes pleading for understanding. I closed my eyes, exhaustion overwhelming me once more.

“I’m going to… figure it out,” I promised and I just heard him sigh.

“I know,” he finally whispered.

Chapter 19: Something Just Like This

Chapter Text

This update is so late! My computer crapped out and so I'm posting this from the app. hopefully no issues!

The song for this chapter is Something Just Like This by The Piano Guys.

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Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

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Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Nineteen: Something Just Like This

CPOV

I paused outside Bella’s room, listening to the happenings inside before entering.

And finally taking the deep breath I felt like I’d been holding since hearing that Bella was in an accident at school and on her way to the hospital. It was like my heart had been trapped beneath an anvil while I waited for her to arrive, waited for her to get her tests done, waited for the nurses to finally page me. Despite Edward’s arrival and recap of events, I still felt the pressure, like at any moment my heart would be crushed and my soul along with it. I didn’t even care that he had revealed his abilities to her as long as she was safe, alive.

Seeing her lying in that hospital bed had nearly wrecked me, the neck brace a cruel reminder of how very fragile she was. It was nearly enough to convince me to change her.

Nearly.

Despite her injuries and the traumatic experience, she’d managed to hold on to her wit and humor. It assuaged some of the fears I had about brain damage. But nothing could persuade me not to keep her in the hospital overnight. I physically and mentally could not bring myself to send her home where she might succumb to further injury. I needed her here, where there were professionals who could keep an eye on her and save her if things started to get worse.

I listened silently, pretending to check my phone, as Charlie told Emmett about the craziest crimes he’d worked on. Alice and Rosalie were fussing over Bella, making sure she was comfortable, adjusting her blankets and pillows. Rosalie kept offering her water or to call the nurse for pain medication while Alice commented on the poor quality of the bed linens. Edward sat in the corner with Jasper, complaining about the lack of tv channels. Bella mostly remained silent, save for answering Rosalie’s offers and telling Alice she was fine.

“Carliisle, what luck!” I turned, surprised to find Esme walking toward me with a loaded duffle bag.

“Esme, what are you doing here,” I asked curiously. She smiled softly at me as the nurses watched our exchange over their charting.

“Alice texted and asked if I would bring some things to make Bella more comfortable but I had some car trouble and I’m running late for a meeting with a client. Is there any chance I could leave these with you?” I raised my eyebrows at her. She smiled slightly wider and I knew that this story was solely for the benefit of the ears listening to us.

“Of course. Please drive safely. Do you need my car?”

“No, I got it all sorted out. Give Bella my love and tell her to feel better.” She kissed my cheek and walked back out, turning and waving before she rounded a corner. I turned to the nurses’ station and grabbed Bella’s chart.

“How has Miss Swan been doing,” I asked, pretending to read through the notes.

“She’s been a bit groggy,” Carol, my favorite of the nurses, responded. “We’ve been punctual about her pain management, though. Between her wrist and her head, she’s sitting at about a solid seven, though I think it’s a bit higher and she’s just putting on a brave face. Her father arrived just a couple of hours ago and your children, niece and nephew are with her now. When they first brought her up she told me she doesn’t really like hospitals after staying with her mother. Poor thing. I can’t imagine going through that at her age. It’s only been a few months as well.” I nodded as she spoke. I hadn’t even considered what staying in the hospital would be like for Bella so soon after her mother’s passing. Was she overwhelmed? Did being here bring up painful memories for her?

“Any vomiting, confusion, anything like that,” I asked her.

“She complained of nausea but no vomiting. She’s been a little sluggish, definitely fatigued but she hasn’t slept much. She’s dizzy when she stands so we put her as a falls risk and told her she has to have help to the bathroom.”

“Thank you, Carol. I’ll bring this in to her and see if she needs something for the nausea.”

“I’ll follow you in. She’s due for more pain meds.” She stood up and headed for the med room while I headed to Bella’s room. I knocked quietly before opening the door.

“I heard there was a party in here,” I said casually as I entered. Bella’s eyes lit up when she saw me, cheeks flushing and I smiled wider.

“Yeah but you’re not invited,” Edward teased.

“Be that as it may, I’m here to do a neuro check on Bella. Oh, and Esme dropped this off for you, Alice. She had to get to a client meeting but said to give you her love, Bella, and that she hopes you feel better.” Alice grabbed the bag from me and dropped it on Jasper’s lap, opening it. Everyone stepped away from the bed except Charlie, who was holding Bella’s hand in the seat next to it. Carol knocked on the doorframe and came in while I began to check Bella’s head for new swelling. Her hair was like silk between my fingers and I had to focus on the fact that her father was sitting right next to her to stop myself from threading my fingers into the hair on the sides of her head and pressing my lips to hers gently.

“Still tender,” I asked her as she flinched when I applied pressure to the same areas as this morning.

“Yes,” she mumbled. “It’s like there’s a jackhammer in my head.”

“This should help with that,” Carol said, typing at the computer before scanning Bella’s ID bracelet and typing again. “On a scale of one to ten, where’s your pain at?”

“Oh, probably just a five or six,” Bella said slowly and I frowned as Edward hummed a negation. I looked over at him and Jasper quickly held up eight fingers.

“Are you sure,” I asked her kindly and she sighed, looking at the ceiling.

“Maybe more like a seven or eight,” she admitted.

“Well, let’s get this medicine in you,” Carol said and she presented Bella with a cup with acetaminophen in it and a cup of water. Bella sat up slowly and we both hovered, ready to offer assistance. She took the pill cup with thanks and swallowed down the pills with some water before handing them back.

“Let me know if you need anything else,” Carol said as she left the room. I resumed my exam, holding Bella’s head gently while I shined my penlight in her eyes.

“Is it okay for her to sleep,” Charlie asked.

“I think enough time has passed that you could sleep for a bit. How is your nausea?”

“I’m really dizzy. Between that and the headache, I feel like my stomach is trying to crawl up my esophagus,” she complained before turning red.

“I recently read a study about treating patients presenting with a concussion with an antinausea and antihistamine concurrently. The results show marked improvement in pain levels as well as nausea and dizziness. I’ll write some orders for those and have Carol bring them in as soon as the pharmacy sends them up, if you’re amenable.”

“If it makes the room stop spinning, I’ll take it,” she sighed.

“Excellent. Any other questions for me?”

“When are we busting her out of this joint,” Emmett complained.

“Bella is staying here until tomorrow morning at the earliest. I suggest you all say your goodbyes soon and let her get some rest.”

“Thanks, Carlisle,” Charlie said, brushing the hair back from Bella’s face.

“Let me know if there’s anything else that I can do for you or if you start feeling worse,” I instructed them before leaving the room to go write the newest orders in her chart.

“Here, Bella,” Alice said excitedly, approaching Bella’s bed, “this pillow will give you much better support. And this minky blanket should be much softer and warmer.” I listened as she helped support Bella while she swapped out pillows while Rosalie covered her in the new blanket. “I also had Esme grab some books from Carlisle’s library. I know you don’t feel like reading now, but maybe later if you get bored, you’ll have these.”

“Thanks, Alice. Really, I’m okay, though.”

“We’re just so happy that you’re okay. When we thought that the van might have crushed you this morning…” Alice trailed off, voice anguished.

“I agree with her,” Charlie said. “I’m happy you weren’t more seriously injured. If I’d lost you…” His voice grew hoarse.

“Dad, I’m okay. I promise it’s just a bump on the head and a bum wrist. You’re stuck with me for a while,” she teased.

“Wouldn’t want it any other way, kid,” he said softly.

“Well, I have makeup work to get done,” Edward said loudly, standing. “Come on, guys. Let’s let Bella get some rest.” They all began to say their goodbyes, filing out of the room one by one.

“Text me if you need anything,” Rose commanded her.

“I will,” Bella promised.

“I’m really happy you didn’t die today,” Rosalie murmured as she hugged her.

“Me too,” Bella said. They left, promising to check on her later. I finished my charting and headed to check on other patients.

~~~STY~~~

My shift finally ended an hour later. I tried to think of a valid reason to go see Bella without raising suspicion but I couldn’t come up with anything. I changed out of my scrubs and headed to the exit nearest where my car was parked.

“Carlisle.” I turned as Charlie walked quickly over to me.

“Charlie, is everything alright?” His face was strained and I immediately wondered what had happened.

Had he found out that Bella and I kissed last night after he left?

Did he know that I was deeply in love with his daughter?

“I hate to ask this, since you’ve had a long day and everything.”

“What is it?”

“I just got called into the station. I was wondering if you could sit with Bella? She pretends not to but she gets stressed in hospitals. The grief counselor she was seeing said it’s a reaction to her mom’s hospital stays. I’d ask Alice but I don’t have her number and I can’t wait for her to get here. She just needs someone familiar with her.”

“Of course, Charlie. I’ll even call Alice when I get up there and ask for her or one of the others to come over.”

“Thank you,” he said fervently. “Without Edward, today would have gone very differently.” I felt icy at his words.

“But it didn’t. She’ll be right as rain in a few days,” I reassured him and he sighed, rubbing his face.

“Thanks, Carlisle. I wish I didn’t have to leave but this is… well, it’s a thing I have to deal with. I don’t know if I’ll be back again tonight.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll see who wants to stay the night with her and keep you updated on how she’s doing.” He clapped a hand to my shoulder and then turned away towards his cruiser with some thank yous thrown over his shoulder. I turned and headed back towards Bella’s room.

“Doctor Cullen, I thought your shift was over,” one of the night nurses said as I approached the door.

“Chief Swan had an emergency at the station. He asked me to sit with Miss Swan until someone could come to keep her company.”

“That’s so sweet! Maybe you could help her order something for dinner? We asked when we did rounds but her nausea medication hadn’t kicked in yet.”

“I’ll see what I can do,” I assured her and turned to Bella’s door. I knocked softly.

“Come in,” she called tiredly. I pushed the door open and smiled at her. “Carlisle,” she breathed out in relief. I smiled at her, closing the door behind me.

“I’m afraid your father had to head into work. He asked if I’d sit with you. I can even call Rose or Alice if you’d like.” I settled into the chair next to her bed.

“I’m so happy you’re here,” she said fervently and I watched as her eyes clouded with tears.

“Oh, sweet girl, don’t cry,” I crooned, gently cupping her head. Her face crinkled and she began crying softly against her pillow.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I don’t even know why I’m so emotional. It’s probably just the hospital thing.”

“Today has been traumatic. It’s a lot to deal with. Your concussion is probably just enhancing those feelings.”

“This is so not how I planned on seeing you after… last night,” she whispered and I chuckled.

“It certainly isn’t how I thought today would go either.”

“We should probably… talk about that,” she said awkwardly, cheeks flushing under my hands and I relished in the flood of warmth against my skin.

“I’ll make you a deal. We can talk all you want as soon as you’ve ordered something to eat,” I promised. She grimaced and I chuckled. “You have to eat something. Even if it’s just a smoothie or a milkshake or some soup.”

“Fine,” she muttered. “Please order me a smoothie and I’ll try to eat it.” I grabbed her room phone and called in the order to the kitchens. Once I had finished, I settled in at her side, placing my arm on the bed next to her legs. “Now, I believe you wanted to talk.” She blushed and I was suddenly wracked with nerves. Was she about to tell me that she hated kissing me last night? That it had just been Edward and Alice’s meddling that had forced last night to happen?

“I.. I really loved last night,” she started quietly. “I honestly didn’t think that you… you know, thought of me like that.” I took her hand in both of mine.

“Bella, I’ve been fighting my feelings for you almost since we met. That’s why Alice and Edward and I have been so at odds. They wanted me to pursue a relationship with you and I refused.” Her sad eyes lingered on my face as I spoke.

“Why didn’t you want to,” she asked. I sighed, mentally cursing Edward and Alice for putting us in this position.

Okay, for helping to facilitate this situation.

I was the one who kissed her.

“My life is… complicated.”

“Because I’m the same age as your kids,” she guessed knowingly.

“That is one factor, though not because of your age itself. I don’t consider age gaps to be as important as society does. Obviously, I’m against relationships where someone in a position of power or authority takes advantage of someone that they have an uneven power dynamic with. Regardless of my feelings, the difference in our ages does present some issues. As you are underrage, if we were to engage in a relationship and your father or someone else did not approve…”

“My dad is a cop, Carlisle. I understand what happens when a legal adult dates a minor and someone doesn’t like it,” she said flatly. “That’s actually why I wanted to talk to you. I don’t want…” She took a deep breath and then gazed at me pleadingly. “I don’t want you to get into legal trouble or anything because I’m still seventeen. I know this town and honestly, even if my dad was on board, there are a lot of people here who would go out of their way to make your life miserable. And…” she trailed off and I waited with bated breath for her to continue. “I guess I just don’t want there to be drama. I really, really like you, Carlisle, but I keep thinking about what would happen if we started seeing each other and I don’t think it ends well.” I nodded, throat tight and heart plummeting. She was being logical and I should applaud her for being the one who was looking at the situation from all sides. “Unless,” she said and she took one of my hands and interlaced our fingers together, staring at our joined hands, her skin only marginally darker than mine, “we didn’t see each other...publicly.”

“Bella, I don’t want you to sneak around and lie. Not on my account. I’m an old man and frankly, you deserve better.”

“You’re not that old,” she argued and I mentally flinched, fully aware that I was much older than she could comprehend.

“I don’t want you to be my dirty little secret,” I said softly. She squeezed my hand.

“The thing is that even if I was eighteen right now and we decided to date, you and I both know that this town would never accept that.” I laughed humorlessly. “Maybe in someplace bigger no one would bat an eye. But Forks is…”

“Old fashioned,” I offered.

“Full of judgmental busybodies who care more about what trouble they can stir up than the damage they’re doing, is what I was going to say,” she said flatly and I raised an eyebrow at the vitriol underlying her tone. “Sorry. I know that seems harsh. But it was the people here who made my mother choose to leave my dad. And honestly, they haven’t changed.”

“People so rarely do,” I said sadly.

“Look, Carlisle, I… I understand if you don’t want to, you know, be with… me. I mean, I don’t exactly bring a lot to the table with a man like you.” I frowned at her as she focused on the fabric of her blanket.

“What on earth is that supposed to mean,” I demanded. She blushed deeper.

“You’re… well, you. You’re this renowned doctor who has his choice of hospitals. You’re cultured and you’ve experienced the world. You have these wonderful, amazing kids. I know that there’s not much a nondescript seventeen year old could contribute in a relationship besides… you know.” I leaned back, stunned.

“Isabella Swan, do you really think that that is all I could want from you?” She shifted uncomfortably. “You are such an intelligent, mature, warm, witty, loving young woman.” She kept avoiding my gaze. “You are beautiful, yes, but you are such a genuine person. You’ve been the first friend my children have ever had outside of their siblings and cousins. You’re selfless and caring. You’ve experienced such heartache and yet you forge through and practice kindness when others would be callous or rude.” She looked up slowly and I saw her eyes were bright. “I don’t know why you think that you are ‘nondescript’ because you are the most interesting person I’ve ever met and Bella, I have met a lot of people.” She chuckled softly. “No one has been able to turn my head and there have been some determined parties who have tried. Only you, Bella. And it isn’t because you’re seventeen.”

“You’re being too generous,” she muttered.

“I can assure you, Bella, that this is me holding back. But this is exactly the reason I don’t want you to feel pressured to be with me. I know I bring a lot of baggage to the table and you have your whole life ahead of you. You can do so much better than me.” She stared at me in disbelief.

“Now who’s being delusional,” she accused bluntly. “I get that you being with you would mean things that I wouldn’t have to deal with if I dated someone my own age. But I don’t care, Carlisle. I don’t want someone my own age. I. Want. You.” I froze, stunned into silence by her no nonsense delivery. “What I was trying to say is that I’m not going to force you or guilt you into being with me. But I want you to know that I’m willing to try and see what this is between us. I get the risks but you’re worth it. We don’t even have to do more than see each other and spend time getting to know each other. We can-” I leaned over, cutting her off as I pressed my mouth to hers fiercely. She melted into my kiss, curling her good hand into the hair above my collar. I caressed her lips with mine, gently but lovingly as I held her head lightly, mindful of the toll Edward’s intervention had taken on her. I kissed her languidly for a few more moments before pulling back enough to rest my head against hers and breathe deeply.

“I will gladly take anything you choose to give me,” I promised her quietly. “If you want to spend the rest of your life just asking me questions and getting to know me better, I will happily tell you everything there is to know about me. But you’ll probably get bored and end up realizing that I really am a boring old man.” She giggled faintly.

“I wouldn’t count on it,” she warned and I grinned. I heard the food cart pulling up outside her door and I moved the chair a respectable distance away from her bed and sat in it, picking up a book from the bag Esme brought and pretending to lose myself in it.

“What,” she began to ask when a knock on the door interrupted her. “Come in,” she called, settling back against the pillows. One of the food service employees entered the room with a tray with a foam cup on it.

“I have your smoothie here. Can you just verify your name and date of birth?” Bella rattled off the information and the woman set the tray on the table next to her bed and wished her a good night.

“You need to try and drink that,” I told her, moving closer to the bed. She grimaced. “Did the medications not make your nausea better?”

“It’s better but I still feel kind of queasy.” I brushed her hair out of her eyes, tucking it behind her ear.

“Just try a little bit. Drink it slowly and if you can tolerate it, you can have more.” I handed her the cup and she took a drink of it gingerly. She rested the cup in her lap and it bumped against the cast on her injured wrist.

“This is going to be fun to try and function with,” she said with a sardonic smile.

“Some practice and I’m sure you’ll be a champion in no time,” I told her, running my fingers over the exposed fingers of her injured hand.

“This isn’t my first wrist cast. With my luck, it probably won’t be my last either.”

“Do I need to wrap you in bubble wrap, Bella,” I asked with an easy smile. She grinned, rolling her eyes.

“That would be a recipe for disaster. I highly doubt that Emmett and Edward would be able to resist the temptation of popping every single bubble.” I laughed and she smiled wider. “I like your laugh,” she murmured. “It’s like being wrapped in a warm hug.” I ducked my head.

Did she really feel that way or was that a result of my vampire abilities, drawing her in with attraction so that she’d be an easy victim?

I stilled at the thought and then brushed it away.

Bella would never be the victim of a vampire.

I’d protect her until the day she died if I had to.

Chapter 20: The Sound of Silence

Chapter Text

Okay so honestly, I have been struggling with my energy levels. I'm trying to just keep plugging along because I love writing this. But my hell, winter is the WOOOOORST. I feel like I'm ready for nap every time I wake up. But I have my new computer and it's amazing (even if it is naked and needs some stickers.) so hopefully that helps because I cannot for the life of me type on the phone.

The song for this chapter is The Sound of Silence by Disturbed.

Connect with me!
Twitter: teamdemonmonkey
Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Twenty: The Sound of Silence

BPOV

I flexed my hand experimentally for the hundredth time in the last twelve hours.

Eight weeks with the cast had been literal hell. My arm felt so light it was like it might float away.

“Finally got rid of the wrist prison,” a voice asked cheerfully from above me before Edward dropped into the seat next to mine as I waited for Government to start. I raised an eyebrow at him.

“Eight weeks was more than enough, thank you.” He chuckled.

“It could have been worse. What would you have done if you’d been in a full body cast?”

“Plotted all the ways to hurt you once I was free of it,” I said blandly and he laughed. “How’d you do it, by the way,” I asked quietly.

“Do what,” he asked, still smiling.

“Save my life.” His smile dimmed.

“Adrenaline,” he said.

The same one word answer that he’d been giving me for the last eight weeks.

“I’m guessing you’re not an average human being.”

“What gives you that idea,” he asked, voice edged with defensiveness.

“Normal humans don’t stop speeding vans with their bare hands,” I whispered into his ear.

“Well, you’re not wrong. I am much more attractive than the average human.” I rolled my eyes at him and leaned back in my seat. “Seriously, Bella, you’re reading too much into this. When was the last time you Googled the miraculous feats that adrenaline is responsible for?”

“When was the last time you did,” I pushed. He grinned.

“Not too long ago.” I huffed and turned back to my desk as our substitute explained our assignment.

I’d been pestering him about it since I got out of the hospital. Charlie had me stay home the rest of the week at Carlisle’s suggestion that I might still have migraines and nausea. I felt like I’d missed more school in the few months I’d been in Forks than I had in my entire life. Carlisle stopped by to check on me at the end of the week. Before leaving, he’d left me his card with his cell phone number written on the back and a wink. He texted me a few hours later and that had been the beginning of getting to know each other better. He asked me questions about everything and when I asked him the same questions, his answers were almost poetic. He had a way with words and unlike my peers, he wrote in complete sentences with proper punctuation.

It shouldn’t have made him more attractive to me but it did.

It really did.

We hadn’t been able to spend more than one night or afternoon a week together, when I could go over to his house while Charlie was working. The first time I’d been nearly shaking with nerves.

Were we supposed to kiss in front of everyone? Hug? Handshake?

Would we just talk or would we make out again? More?

Were we going to be around his family or on our own?

Despite the fact that we had talked and that he had assured me that we could move at whatever pace I was comfortable with, I had no idea what to do. I didn’t want to rush anything. But in my spare time, I always managed to find myself thinking of him, the unyielding pressure of his lips against mine, his hands tangled in my hair.

We’d sat on the couch next to each other after Alice suggested we watch a movie together. Close enough that our thighs touched and our arms brushed the other’s. I’d sat with my hands in my lap, fidgeting, hyper-aware of how close we were, every movement he made. He’d fidgeted as well, rubbing his hands over his thighs repeatedly. His hands finally rested on the side of his thigh, not touching my leg but so, so close.

It had taken me an embarrassingly long period of the movie to realize that he was trying to work up the courage to take my hand in his without making me feel like he was pushing me. Once I’d realized, prickles erupted over my body and I felt hot, the all too familiar rushing of blood flooding over me. I’d slipped my hand into his, the cool feeling of his skin against mine soothing some of the heat. Our eyes had met, his filled with a need for reassurance, before he’d adjusted my hand more firmly in his and settled in against me.

We’d only shared small things like that since then. We’d hold hands, snuggle on the couch while hanging out with the others or sometimes the couch in his beautiful library. Once, I fell asleep against his chest while he held me and read aloud. We never lost ourselves in the passion that had consumed us the first night we’d kissed but I felt it simmering under the surface whenever he touched me.

“Hello? Earth to Bella.” I snapped myself from the thoughts I’d lost myself in. Edward was standing over me while the class was moving past me or packing backpacks up. “Are you with me?”

“Physically, yes. Mentally is debatable.” I gathered my things and packed them up while Edward watched.

“You seemed pretty zoned out there,” he teased.

“Well, when you’ve seen the amazing things I have, school feels a little less exciting,” I deadpanned.

“Awh, Bella, you flatter me so.”

“I wasn’t. I hate you.”

“Why? I’m lovely.” We walked out of the classroom only to find students rushing for the doors with more excitement than they usually exhibited. We followed them curiously and stopped when we noticed everyone was crowding in the parking lot, looking up at the roofs of the school buildings. I turned around to see what they were looking at.

My jaw dropped.

“How in the hell…” I turned to Edward who was shaking his head, a small smile on his face. “Did you do this,” I demanded. He scoffed.

“Please, Bella. As if I would do this.” I turned back and tried to rationalize what I was seeing.

My truck in all its red and rusty glory was sitting soundly on the roof of the main office building. Edward’s car and four other cars that I didn’t recognize sat on the other school buildings. I looked around wildly for a crane or other piece of heavy machinery that would possibly explain how this had happened.

“Oh no, Bella, what happened,” an overly concerned voice said behind me and I closed my eyes and began to nod. I turned around. Emmett was standing with his hands in his pockets, staring at me earnestly while Edward began to laugh beside me.

“How’d you do it,” I asked plainly.

“Do what,” he asked, the picture of confusion. But I couldn’t miss the sparkle in his eyes.

“I want to know how you got those cars on the roof.”

“I can’t reveal my secrets,” he whispered and I shook my head, eyes narrowed.

“Did you do it the same way Edward stopped the van?” Instead of getting defensive like Edward normally did wh,en I brought up my near accident, Emmett guffawed.

“Edward is a scrawny scrap of nothing. You don’t need adrenaline when you have guns like these.” He flexed his massive biceps with a smolder. “Also, consider us even for that whole arrest thing.”

“It took you eight weeks to come up with this? Next time I’ll go easier on you so you don’t hurt yourself trying to think up a comeback.” He grinned at me.

“You’re one insult away from a war, Swan,” he warned playfully.

“Then I will see you in Hell, Emmett Cullen,” I taunted.

“Give the devil my regards,” he said as he moved into my space menacingly.

“Oh, I will.”

“And remind him that he still owes me fifty bucks for helping him out that one time.”

“Well, this just confirms that you have to have supernatural help to do anything.” Edward began to laugh louder as Principal Greene came out and started ushering kids toward their next classes. I made my way toward Trig still smiling to myself.

~~~~STY~~~~

“They better not find out that Emmett is responsible for that little stunt with the cars,” I mentioned casually to Edward as we made our way from the lunch room to Biology. He shook his head.

“Knowing him, we’ll be lucky he doesn’t take out an ad in the paper claiming responsibility.”

“For reals though: did he do it using whatever super powers you all must have?” His eyes tightened slightly.

“Really, Bella? Back on the superpowers thing? I’ve already told you that I didn’t fall into a vat of nuclear waste and come out with superstrength.”

“Are you sure you weren’t bitten by a radioactive roll of toilet paper because you’re a super-asswipe,” I asked sweetly. He laughed and grabbed my shoulders pulling me into him for a hug. He was cold, even through the sweater he was wearing and I filed that away in the list of things that didn’t add up with him.

And Carlisle.

I didn’t like to think about the fact that Carlisle was obviously lying to me. He clearly knew whatever the secret was that had allowed Edward to save my life that day.

And I wasn’t stupid.

I’d Googled Hirudo Anemia when my mind had been spiraling with endless questions and had no hints or answers from Edward or any of his family.

Nothing came back.

The disease didn’t exist.

The only results that come back was that anemia was contraindicated in the use of hirudotherapy. After I’d searched for that, I was left feeling confused. Hirudotherapy literally meant using leeches, which was still apparently done in the medical community. I searched for different kinds of anemia thinking that maybe I had misheard or misremembered what he told me. But nothing came up. Nothing came up when I searched for their physical characteristics and blood disease.

All I had was what Carlisle had told me which was apparently leeches and blood deficiency.

I didn’t know what to think.

I couldn’t bring it up with Carlisle. I was barely handling the fact that Edward -and the rest of them -were keeping me in the dark intentionally. There was no way that I would be able to handle forcing Carlisle to either lie to my face or to push him away. I knew it was irrational but if Edward was willing to lie for two months straight about it, it was clearly important enough that Carlisle would too. Otherwise, why wouldn’t he have told me?

But I couldn’t just let it go. What I had seen… what Edward had done… it was all too fantastical to forget about and it consumed my thoughts almost as much as Carlisle did.

“You know, when you get all silent and broody like that, it worries me,” he complained, breaking me from my thoughts. “I have no idea what you’re thinking.” He said it quietly, dark frustration tinging his words. I found myself reasserting that on my mental list. He always seemed frustrated when he talked about not knowing what I was thinking.

“Well, I can see how superior intellect and thought would worry you: it’s such a foreign concept for you to grasp,” I assured him halfheartedly. He stuck his tongue out at me as we took our seats.

“Really, what were you thinking about?”

“I was just thinking about your family.”

“What about them?”

“Look, Edward, I’m tired of asking about how you did what you did,” I said quietly. “I’ve tried to let it go, to not wonder about it. But I can’t stop.”

“Bella, if I could tell you some super secret reason for what happened, don’t think I would? It was adrenaline. I saw the van coming for you and just moved. It was crazy.”

“I think you think that you can’t tell me. I don’t know if that’s just because you think that you can’t trust me or you’re so used to keeping it. But I wish you would. I feel like your family is just sitting on these big secrets and despite how attached I am to you and your fath-family, I have no idea what it is.” He was silent, staring at the textbook he opened in front of him. I watched him, desperate for him to open up to me, to trust me. When he remained silent, I turned to my own book and tried to pay attention to Mr Banner’s lecture. I could feel Edward’s eyes on me and my own felt hot.

The Cullens were more than just friends.

They were family.

I was in love with the head of the family.

I was best friends with his children.

And yet, it was glaringly obvious that there were things I didn’t know about them.

Big things.

Game changers.

Deal breakers.

When Mr Banner turned us loose to do our assignment, I busied myself with the worksheet he’d passed out and my book, ignoring Edward so he wouldn’t see how upset I was, how close I was to just breaking.

“I can’t tell you this secret,” he said quietly. I paused, clenching my jaw to stop the storm swirling inside of me from spilling out in a torrent of words. “But I want to tell you a secret. My secret.” I waited, still not daring to look at him. “Have you ever wondered why I haven’t dated any of the girls here?”

“Honestly, I assumed it was because you’d spoken to the girls here,” I countered. He smirked.

“Yes. But it’s really because I already have… someone. Someone special to me.”

“Why don’t you just tell people that?” He grimaced.

“She’s… older than I am.” My eyes widened. “It wouldn’t be considered kosher. It’s easier to just seem standoffish than to try and explain something that would only make people rude and judgmental.”

“So… how does it work, you and her? Do you guys ever see each other? Is it long distance? Is it the girl you told me about when we first met?”

“We see each other regularly but it does suck that we can’t really be public about it.”

I felt that one in the depths of my soul.

“It’s not the same girl. To be honest, there was no girl. It would have been impossible to explain in a way that wouldn’t have just led to endless questions.” I frowned at him.

“So, all that stuff that you were going through when we met, the way you hated me,” I asked and he flinched, “wasn’t because of an ex-girlfriend who broke your heart?”

“No, and I am incredibly sorry for lying to you. It was mostly because it is exhausting to have to keep up the pretense and deal with the girls here. But I was also dealing with the fact that there are things I would love to be able to do with her. Public things. But we’re forced to just keep it under wraps and lie.” I felt queasy.

“Is that what’s going to happen with Carlisle and I? We’ll get so fed up with lying that it will start to affect our behavior?” He frowned.

“No, it’s not-”

“Is that why you pushed so hard,” I asked brokenly, barely holding in the tears that wanted to flow down my cheeks. “Because you wanted someone else to have to suffer through the same things you do?” He looked horrified.

“Never. Bella, I would never have pushed him towards you just because I wanted to share the misery. I knew how good you two would be for each other, for this family. I want him to be happy.” He was earnest but now I wasn’t sure about anything. I didn’t think this had been his intention when he told me his secret but all I could focus on was the grim picture he was painting.

A relationship with an age gap that people disapproved of that demanded secrecy and lies.

All of that wearing on you until you just took it out on the next person to wrong you, even by accident.

Having to lie about your life, to the people you cared about most.

“Bella, I can see what you’re thinking and I swear, it isn’t like that!” I focused on breathing deeply to try and calm myself down.

“Miss Swan, is everything okay,” I heard Mr Banner ask me distantly.

“She was complaining about her stomach at lunch,” Edward lied smoothly. “I think she might have eaten something that didn’t agree with her.”

“You’d best take her to the nurse then, Mr Cullen.” Edward stood and gathered our things before helping me out of my seat and supporting me with an arm around my waist out of the classroom and then the building. We emerged into the all too familiar rain but instead of the nurse’s office, he led me to Emmett’s Jeep, lifting me into the passenger seat before moving around the car to the driver’s side.

“Okay, Bella, look at me,” he demanded furiously. He grabbed my chin and forced my gaze to his. “I wouldn’t trade anything in the world for this woman. I would suffer a thousand fates worse than this one just to be with her. Most days, I don’t even think about any of the negatives because I know that she’s my soulmate and I love her so fiercely that even if I had the choice to go back, I would still choose her. Always, in a thousand lifetimes, even if I could be with anyone in the history of existence, I would choose her. Every. Single. Time.”

“But what if… what if it’s not like that with Carlisle and me,” I breathed out as a tear slipped down my cheek unbidden. His face softened.

“It is, Bella.” I shook my head.

“You don't know that. We’ve only known each other for a few months. And he…” I stopped, afraid to voice the deep fears I kept locked away, deep inside of me.

“He what?”

“He could do so much better than me,” I whispered before my breath caught in a sob.

“Oh, Bella,” Edward said as I shook my head at him. He pulled me into his chest and held me as I cried, his hand stroking my hair while I let go of the fragile dam I had built over the last couple of months. I imagined that I was purging everything as tears flooded from my eyes.

All the secrets.

All the lies.

The knowledge that without Edward’s inexplicable assistance, I would be in the ground.

This town.

These people.

Everything came out and I cried until my throat felt raw and achy. My face felt tacky and itchy and my eyes were undoubtedly swollen. Edward held me, not saying anything until I finally stopped, holding still against him.

“I know that it feels new; it feels hard. It seems so tenuous right now, like it could just crumble and fall apart and you’ll be left heartbroken. It seems impossible when all you want is to be with him every day, sharing your experiences, soaking in life and the joy and happiness together, but you can’t. But I promise, it stops feeling impossible. It stops feeling unfair. You worry that he’ll leave or that it won’t work. You and Carlisle are end game. You are meant to be with each other forever. It won’t end. It will just keep going. It will keep getting easier. It will get even better. And one day, you’ll look back at everything and you will realize that it was worth it. That you couldn’t imagine doing it any other way; that you wouldn’t change anything because your experiences are what made it so good.” I sniffed, wiping an errant tear from my eyes.

“She must be special, this mystery woman of yours,” I said lightly. He chuckled.

“She’s the most amazing woman in the world.”

“Thank you,” I said after a moment.

“You’re welcome.”

“Can I ask you just one more thing?”

“Sure.”

“This big secret you guys are keeping? Is it because you don’t trust me?” He pulled away from me, staring at me with an almost frenzied madness in his eyes.

“Bella, I would tell you in a heartbeat. But I can’t be the one to tell you. Carlisle should be the one to tell you. But he’s afraid.”

“Because it will change things?”

“Yes. And… knowing comes with risks: consequences. He doesn’t want to put that on you. Not yet. He thinks that it can be avoided. But Alice and I know better and eventually, it will be a conversation he will have to have. And I’m just asking that when that time comes, take your time to really process it. Don’t rush to conclusions.”

“Is it… bad?”

“Bad is a matter of perspective.”

“Is it keeping-a-psychotic-wife-locked-up-in-the-attic bad?” He laughed.

“No. But it might change how you look at him?”

“That’s comforting,” I said sarcastically. I sat up and rubbed my hands over my face with a sigh. “When this is all over, I want my sanity back.”

“What sanity? You’ve been crazy since the day I met you.” I laughed softly, stretching my back from the stiffness that had begun to set in. My door opened and I spun around.

“Do you two ever go to class? I swear, you skip- who did this,” Emmett started, his face darkening as he took in my disheveled appearance and red, swollen eyes.

“Whoever it is, they’re going to wish they were dead,” Rosalie threatened and I heaved out a chuckle, jumping from the Jeep gracelessly before throwing my arms around Emmett and squeezing.

“Thank you for being you,” I muttered to him before letting go and hugging Rosalie. “I’m so happy I have both of you in my corner.” Rosalie hugged me back.

“Of course we are. Now point us to the punk who made you cry.” I chuckled, pulling back and holding her arms.

“No one made me cry. I mean, Edward started it.” They both turned on Edward who had exited the Jeep and come around the other side. “Oh my gosh, guys, he didn’t hurt me or anything. I’ve just… I’ve been stressed but Edward and I talked and I feel a lot better now.” They glared at Edward and I laughed, pushing past them. “Now, how are we all getting home since Edward and I are carless thanks to some jerk who put our wheels on the roof of the school?”

~~~~STY~~~~

“Hey, Bella, have you given any thought to who you’re going to ask to the dance,” Alice asked me. I looked up from the book I was reading as I rested against Carlisle’s chest. His left arm was curled against my waist and stomach, the other holding a medical journal against the top of the couch. It took me a minute to process what she had asked.

“Um, no, I haven’t,” I said, my cheeks starting to warm.

“Why not? You only have a week left!”

“I’m not planning on going,” I muttered. Carlisle’s hand began to draw lazy circles against my stomach.

“Because you can’t take Carlisle,” she asked shrewdly and I rolled my eyes.

“And because I have the coordination of a drunk baby giraffe,” I reminded her.

“That’s just cruel. Who would get a baby giraffe drunk,” Jasper asked from his chair. I made a face at him and he grinned.

“Oh come on, Bella, it’s not that bad.”

“Um, yes, it very much is. Honestly, unless the goal is to land me a hot date with Carlisle in the emergency room, you should just drop the whole dance thing.”

“I, for one, am against dates in the emergency room,” Carlisle said from behind me, the rumble of voice vibrating in my chest and making my heart quicken.

“I was thinking that maybe you could ask Edward,” Jasper suggested nonchalantly as he perused a worn book. I felt Carlisle go oddly still behind me.

“Yeah, how about we don’t and don’t even say we did,” I said with forced cheerfulness.

“Please, Bella,” Edward said, moving away from the piano he’d been fiddling at to come sit on the arm of the couch by my feet. He was looking behind me with -what I could only describe as -a sh*t eating grin on his face. I frowned at him.

“You’re not exactly single, buddy. You told me so today.” His smile grew wider as his eyes remained fixed behind me.

“Yeah but she won’t mind.”

“That’s awfully presumptuous of you. I certainly wouldn’t want my boyfriend going to a dance with someone else.”

“Please, Bella,” Alice pleaded. “Edward never gets to come to any of the school things with us.”

“Hey, guys. What are we talking about,” Esme asked, coming from upstairs, a basket of laundry perched on her hip.

“Bella won’t go to the dance with Edward because he’s already in a relationship and apparently she can’t dance,” Jasper explained.

“Oh, I don’t think that should be a problem,” she answered brightly. “I’m sure that Edward’s girlfriend wouldn’t mind at all if he went with you.” I stared at her, unable to stop my face from conveying that I was sure everyone in the room had lost their minds.

“Esme,” Carlisle breathed out behind me in what sounded like resignation.

“Really, Esme? You don’t think that she would be bugged by it?”

“Not at all. In fact, it would be nice if Edward got to participate in school functions. Not to mention, this way he doesn’t have to hurt anyone’s feelings by rejecting their offer.” I looked from her to Alice, who was staring at me with puppy dog eyes. I looked over to Edward to find him shaking with silent laughter.

“I’m going to get hurt,” I warned him. Alice squealed and jumped up and down, clapping her hands excitedly.

“I won’t let you get hurt,” Edward promised.

“If you do, you’ll find yourself in need of the emergency room,” Carlisle muttered darkly.

Oh.

Was he not okay that I was doing this?

I turned around to look at him.

“Is this okay,” I asked him anxiously. He smiled, brushing my hair off of my neck.

“You are more than welcome to accompany Edward to the dance. Although, I must say that I feel like the company will be lacking.” Edward scoffed behind me and I giggled. “While I wish I could take you myself, I certainly don’t want to stand in the way of you experiencing all of the opportunities and offerings of your youth.”

“I wish you could take me too,” I mumbled, hooking his fingers with mine. He smiled, lifting my fingers to press to his lips softly.

“You’ll have a great time. Even if your choice is in dates is hugely lacking.” I laughed.

“I resent that remark,” Edward complained.

“I think you mean represent,” I countered. “Does anyone know where I can get a bulletproof dress? Should I Google it? Maybe search on Etsy?” Edward rolled his eyes.

“It’s not going to be that bad. I promise I won’t let anything happen to you.”

“It’s cute that you think you can cancel out the, quite frankly, handicap level of clumsiness I possess.”

“I’ve got mad skills, Bella. If you’re not careful, you might even enjoy yourself.”

“I find that highly unlikely. You aren’t Carlisle.”

“That might be the most offensive insult you’ve ever paid me,” Edward said, hand to his chest in mock pain.

“And yet, I don’t care,” I said happily. His eyes narrowed.

“I’m just happy you both are coming,” Alice cheered. “And don’t worry about a dress, Bella. If you don’t want to go pick one out with me, I can just pick something for you.” I sighed.

“No, I should go with you. We can make it a whole thing,” I said with a shudder. She threw her arms around me with a squeal.

“We are going to have so much fun! I’ll invite Rose and Esme can drive! We’ll have the best girls’ trip ever!”

“Can we just, you know, not take forever to do it? Shopping trips aren’t really my scene.”

“I promise that it will be efficient and fun,” Alice assured me before grabbing Jasper’s hand and dashing up the stairs, listing off all the things we needed to get.

“I’ve made a terrible mistake, haven’t I,” I asked the room in general and Esme laughed, walking away to the laundry room.

“Probably but at least you’ll be dressed to kill,” Edward pointed out blithely.

Chapter 21: Nothing Else Matters

Chapter Text

Hey how about a new chapter to start off the new year?! I'm a little early for that (or late for Christmas and REALLY late for Hannukah) but I'm doing my best to get the chapters written and edited. I know exactly what is going to happen and we are getting close to the chapters I have been WAITING to write and share with you all!!!

The song for this chapter is Nothing Else Matters by Metallica (technically used the one from the Jungle Cruise soundtrack. Part 2 if we're getting really specific.).

Connect with me!
Twitter: teamdemonmonkey
Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Twenty One: Nothing Else Matters

CPOV

“What if you pushed me down the stairs so that I break my leg and I don’t have to go?” I chuckled and turned to face Bella, leaning into the doorway of my study. I set down the book I had been perusing and gestured for her to come closer.

“While I see the point of such an exercise, I can’t say that I like your prospects of survival,” I answered calmly. She rolled her eyes with a soft smile and settled on the arm of my chair. I wrapped an arm around her and played with the hem of her shirt.

“I understand why I’m going but Alice literally just listed off about eight stores that she wants to visit and now I’m not so sure my reasons were good enough.” I grinned, fully aware that Alice had taken the shopping trip that Bella had agreed to and turned it into a full affair, like she always did.

“If you don’t want to go, I doubt she’ll force you.”

“No, she’ll just turn those puppy dog eyes on me and stick out her lip and I’ll feel like a terrible human being for disappointing her,” she muttered with a pout.

“It’s like she wasn’t raised with any manners,” I teased and her pout lifted into a grin. She looped her arms around my neck and leaned down, resting her head against mine. I closed my eyes, breathing in her mouthwatering scent. Her skin was warm against mine and I basked in the contact.

“I’d much rather stay here with you,” she whispered, her breath fanning over my face.

“I’d much rather that as well,” I agreed, pulling her into my lap and wrapping my arms solidly around her. Her heart quickened and she pressed a kiss to my jaw lightly. I forced myself to start reciting the Declaration of Independence instead of getting lost in the feeling.

“What are you going to do today,” she asked quietly against my neck.

“I’m on call today. So I usually read or catch up on paperwork.”

“How about I do your reading and you can go try on dresses with Alice,” she said and I could hear the smile in her voice.

“I would but I’m afraid everything just looks terrible on me.” She giggled and my mouth quirked into a grin automatically.

She was perfection.

“Bella! We have to go!” Alice came charging into the study, hands on her hips.

“Oh no, I think I’m coming down with something,” Bella said halfheartedly, forcing out a cough. “Carlisle should probably check me over and make sure that it’s nothing serious.” I bit back a laugh as Alice rolled her eyes.

“The only thing you’ve come down with is a case of raging hormones and unfortunately those will have to wait because if we don’t leave now, we won’t get to Port Angeles in time to go to all the stores we need to.”

“Oh no,” Bella deadpanned before sighing. “Okay, okay, I’m coming.” She pressed a soft kiss to my lips that left me with a deep desire to shove Alice out of the room and lock the door. She lifted herself off of my lap and began to follow Alice out of the room. She turned back to me while walking. “Remember me,” she sighed dramatically and I couldn’t stop the laughter at her antics.

Probably just to get Alice’s goat.

“I shall keep a memento of you near me always,” I assured her with equal dramatics. She laughed and blew me a kiss before following Alice downstairs and out to the garage where Esme and Rosalie were waiting. They climbed into the car and took off down the driveway, leaving me feeling colder and slightly empty.

“I have to take credit for this,” Edward teased from downstairs. I scoffed.

“I think you mean blame,” I pointed out. I could still feel my blood boiling when he suggested taking my Bella to a dance. I’d thought every unsavory name I could muster. When I’d discovered that he’d told Bella he was seeing someone, I was ready to commit murder.

Meddlesome, interfering little bastard.

He laughed and zoomed up the stairs, leaning in the doorway of my study.

“I don’t know why you’re so upset. You’ve taken my wife to so many public engagements that I think losing Bella to me for one measly high school dance is positively trivial in comparison.”

“You agreed to the cover stories that we have had over the years, Edward. I certainly didn’t steal your wife from under your nose. She and I have played the roles and responsibilities our different stories have required without anything more than the familial camaraderie we share.”

“Awh, old man, are you afraid that I will manage to steal Bella’s affections?” I glared at him as he baited me.

“I find it far more likely that she will injure herself purposely to escape you.” He threw his head back and laughed.

“She plays it cool but we both know she actually loves me.” I bristled at his words, despite knowing he didn’t actually mean love.

“I cannot fathom how a creature as perfect as she managed to develop such poor, poor taste in friends,” I lamented and shook myhead.

“She has excellent taste. The problem is you're such an old man, you wouldn’t appreciate quality if it waltzed up and groped your buttocks.” I pinched the bridge of my nose.

“I grossly miscalculated, changing you at such an immature age.” He smirked at me.

“It’s not my fault I’m immersed in the minds of teenagers for most of the day. It was bound to rub off on me.” I opened my mouth with a retort but my pager began to buzz and I pulled it off my belt with a frown.

Code Green: Mass Trauma.

Edward sat up, alerted to my alarm.

“Something happened,” he asked urgently as I jumped up and began to gather my things, hurrying to get to my car.

“There must have been an accident,” I muttered as I grabbed my bag and we sped to the car. He climbed in with me and we sped away from the house.

“I’ll let Esme know in case it affects their trip,” he said, pulling out his phone. “What can we do to help you?”

“Just make sure Bella stays safe. I won’t be able to concentrate if I’m worrying over her.”

It wasn’t completely untrue.

I could focus on a great many things at once but somehow the thought of Bella in danger challenged me in a way nothing had before. Edward nodded and then hopped out of the car shortly before I cleared the trees to the hospital parking lot, running into the forest. I pulled into my parking space. Ambulances were pulling up and unloading gurneys while cars and people began to flood the road and parking lot. I hopped out of the car, running at the fastest human pace I could get away with into the building. I grabbed a set of scrubs and threw my things in my office. Nurses were rushing around and Dr Gerandy was instructing staff where to send the incoming patients.

“Carlisle,” he said, shoulders stiff with tension. He looked relieved to see me but that did very little to ease the stress that nearly radiated off of him.

“What do we have,” I asked matter of factly.

“Logging accident. A lot of crush injuries and burns. Don’t know for sure what happened but someone claimed there was an equipment malfunction and it dropped logs onto a pile and sent the whole thing rolling downhill. First two are in bays one and two with four more incoming while they triage.” I nodded and moved quickly to bay two, meeting the nurses outside the door.

“Patient is a forty-five year old male. Suffered a head and back injury when several logs rolled over him. BP is two thirty-two over one sixty. Heart rate is one-oh-eight.” I perused the chart handed to me as we entered, memorizing the information. I looked up, prepared to start my assessment and my blood ran cold.

Charlie Swan.

He was lying flat on the bed, neck in a stabilizing collar and blood oozing sluggishly from his head. The nurses were already attaching a bolus IV and connecting the blood pressure and heart monitors to his arm and chest.

“Charlie,” I said over the sound of nurses bustling around him, moving closer. His brown eyes -so much like his daughter’s -flew to meet mine and he grimaced.

“I told Earl and Peggy I was fine but they insisted on sticking me in this collar and loading me up,” he grumbled. I smirked slightly.

“Can you tell me your name,” I asked, pulling my penlight out of my pocket and starting my examination.

“Charles Swan.”

“Excellent. What day is it today?”

“March twenty-seventh.”

“Can you name the twelve Supreme Court Justices?”

“No, but I couldn’t do that before this so that’s not really much to measure by.” I chuckled.

“What’s the last thing you remember before getting injured?” He frowned and winced, the lines in his forehead pulling at a laceration.

“I noticed something on a knuckleboom loader. Looked like a blinking light. I was going over to try and get the operator to take a break and check on it but it detonated and the claw released it’s load onto the pile. I tried to move but they knocked me over and rolled right over me down the hill.” The nurses had all slowed to a stop while he spoke, horror evident on their faces.

“What do you remember first after the logs rolling over you?”

“Fire. It blew the hydraulic lines and the fluid had ignited. It was raining liquid fire over everything. A lot of people were screaming. I tried to get up and couldn’t. I thought maybe I was trapped under a log. People started trying to help the injured and first responders showed up a little later.”

“It sounds like a terrifying experience,” I murmured, removing the collar from his neck and probing gently for injuries. I didn’t feel any hot spots that indicated injury but replaced the collar until we had imaging to support that claim. “We’re going to get x-rays and CT scans of your head, neck and back to ensure that you didn’t sustain any serious injuries.” I dictated my orders to a nurse, who entered them in the system as I spoke.

“Bella,” he barked, panic sending the heart monitors into a frenzy. “Where is she?” I turned back around.

“She and Alice went with Esme and Rosalie to Port Angeles to find a dress for the dance. They left about half an hour before I got paged.” He relaxed visibly.

“Thank god,” he muttered under his breath. I frowned. “Don’t call her. She doesn’t need to come back until she’s finished.”

“Is Bella in danger,” I asked quietly and his eyes met mine, the panic not completely abated, fighting with fear for dominance. He opened his mouth to answer but the transport team arrived to take him to imaging. He was wheeled away and for the first time in my career, I was torn between abandoning my duties as a doctor and my patients to find Bella and assure myself that she was indeed safe. I didn’t know of any reason to fear for her but Charlie’s obvious concern for her wellbeing had me on the edge of my control. I took a bracing breath and forced myself to set aside my own concerns and move to the next patient who needed my help.

~~~STY~~~

It was a brutal day. There were more broken bones and crush injuries than I cared to count.

The burn victims were worse.

Burn injuries were some of the only ailments that made me feel like I was human. My heightened abilities provided me with very little to help save or treat them. We’d had nine burn victims admitted to the ER. Three of them had severe burns over less than a quarter of their body. Four had burns over fifty percent.

The last two were in critical condition, barely recognizable as human.

We’d been able to secure a bed at a burn unit at a bigger hospital for one of them. The other I’d been doing my damndest to stabilize.

It was agonizing to hear his anguished screams as we attempted to debride the burns. I’d witnessed many horrors in my long life.

I had watched my father burn innocent women at the stake for crimes of heresy and witchcraft they never committed.

I’d been prey to a ravenous vampire in the sewers of London.

I’d listened to the screams of innocent people being sacrificed to the Volturi as meals, hunted for sport.

I’d watched good men die on the battlefields of America in its infancy, their glorious visions of freedom abandoned as they begged their gods to end their suffering.

I watched men murder their brothers and kin in a war that tore apart the very nation other men had died to create.

I watched the native people of this and other lands fall prey to the whims of the invading conquerors and their insatiable quest for dominance.

I’d listened with mounting horror as radios recounted the assassination of a political leader a world away that would draw the civilized world into an encompassing war.

I’d witnessed thousands of people succumb to an incurable illness while others were felled by bullets half a world away, fighting on a land that wasn’t theirs for a freedom they believed belonged to all.

I’d read with dismay the news reports of a man in Germany who had radical ideas that were leading men to turn on their friends and neighbors.

I’d done my best to heal the battle broken and wounded as we were gripped in another global war.

I’d done what I could to better the world and ease suffering: war after war, man turning on man, men discarding women and children like trash.

I had seen my fair share of atrocities in my long existence and trying to treat this young man -a boy who had graduated only a year ago -matched them all in absolute horror and the feeling of hopelessness that came from knowing that even my best efforts weren’t enough.

I was resting against a wall outside the hospital, knees propped up, face buried in my hand as I tried to scrub the memories from my mind. The air was wet with the near constant mist that permeated this part of the world. It was already dark and I looked up at the night sky, lost in the stars while I questioned the fairness of today’s events.

“Where is he?! Why didn’t anyone tell me sooner?” My head snapped up as Bella’s voice drifted across the parking lot to me. She was marching from Alice’s car toward the ER entrance. Her eyes were alight with indignation. Alice and Esme were following behind. “How long has he been here? How bad is it?” She was directing the questions behind her. I could hear how tight her throat was from the effort not to cry. I stood quickly and walked toward her.

“Bella,” I called softly and she turned, her face softening when she saw me. She ran to me, throwing her arms around my waist and burying her head in my chest. She cried softly for a minute before pulling back, face wet with tears while she gripped my scrub top.

“How is he,” she demanded softly. I placed my hands on her shoulders, drawing us into the darkened area I’d been resting in.

“He’s okay. He hurt his head when the accident happened but he doesn’t have any serious injuries outside of some whiplash and some deep tissue bruising.”

“What happened?”

“I’m not entirely sure. It appears that there was a malfunction with some logging equipment earlier today.”

“Why was he there,” she muttered to herself before turning steely eyes on me. “Why didn’t you call and tell me he was in the hospital,” she accused.

“He asked me to wait,” I told her softly. “He didn’t want you to worry.”

“That’s his reason. What’s your excuse,” she said flatly and I flinched.

“It was his call to make. I’ve barely had a moment to myself until now with all the injuries. It’s been… busy,” I finished lamely and she stared at me before nodding and turning away from me.

“Show me where Charlie is,” was all she said apathetically before she walked into the ER, not waiting to see if I was following or not.

I had the feeling that this discussion wasn’t over yet and even more that I had made a gross misstep with her that left me wanting nothing more than to beg her forgiveness and fix it.

Chapter 22: Just Give Me A Reason

Chapter Text

Um... long time, no read! Sorry guys. Real life hit me hard. But also Bella and I were arguing because she wasn't supposed to get mad at Carlisle and she was not happy that I was taking his side in the argument even though I wasn't. I just didn't want him in the doghouse. But, just like when these to crazy kids kissed, I was overruled and basically told to suck it up.

The song for this chapter is Just Give Me A Reason, the cover by Madilyn Bailey and Chester See.

Connect with me!
Twitter: teamdemonmonkey
Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Twenty-Two: Just Give Me A Reason

BPOV

"Okay, Charlie, close your eyes!" I laughed as Charlie's grumbles carried up the stairs to where Alice, Rose and I were waiting to make our 'grand entrance' -at Alice's insistence of course. They came over earlier in the afternoon and tested the limits of our friendship by torturing me with curling irons, tweezers and makeup. I felt like I'd been plucked within an inch of my life but the end results spoke for themselves.

I looked like I belonged with them in all their ethereal beauty. My hair was curled and pinned until it fell over my shoulder like a waterfall. Alice and I had argued over dresses until we settled on a blood red high-low dress that fell just below my knees in front and to the floor in the back. The bodice was covered with lace and tiny rhinestones. The sleeves were off the shoulder with a bow-sash topping layers of tulle that fell in tiers in a horsehair hemline. I felt transformed and also completely insane, dressed to the nines and preparing to head to adance.

Rosalie descended the stairs first and Charlie blushed and mumbled out several compliments. Alice followed after, floating down like she had actual wings. She kissed Charlie on the cheek and he turned red. I took a deep breath -praying to any deity listening to not let me fall down the stairs and break my neck -before stepping down the stairs carefully, thankful that I hadn't backed down when Alice had tried to talk me out of my trusty black Converse. I gripped the railing even with my lack of heels, watching my feet. When I reached the bottom, I looked up shyly at Charlie. His eyes were bright and soft and I smiled at him.

"Wow, Bells, you look… really nice," he said, clearing his throat. I wrapped my arms around him, taking care not to squeeze him too tightly. He was still recovering from whatever had happened at the lumber yard. I didn't know details and when I asked, he told me it was part of an ongoing investigation and he couldn't tell me anything, even if he knew I'd never tell. I stepped back after a moment and pretended not to notice when he subtly swiped his hands under his eyes. "Your mom would have loved this," he said hoarsely and I felt tears begin to well in my own eyes. "She was the fancy one." I snorted out a laugh.

"No crying!" She stepped between us with her hands held up in panic. "You'll ruin your makeup!" I laughed, rolling my eyes at her while Charlie muttered about having dust in his eye.

"Hey, Alice, can you take a picture of me and my dad together," I asked, pulling my phone out of my dress pocket. Yes,pockets. I might be dressed to do little more than stand around drinking bad punch, but I wasn't about to sacrifice functionality for appearance. She grinned and plucked it from my hands, stepping back with Rose to frame up her shot. I pulled Charlie into my side and smiled for the camera. Alice took a few different shots before the doorbell rang. Rose opened it, revealing Edward wearing an expensive looking tux and a grin. When he saw me, he whistled slowly.

"Damn, Swan, you might be prettier than I am tonight." I rolled my eyes at him.

"He thinks pretty highly of himself, doesn't he," Charlie muttered to me and I laughed.

"No one loves Edward as much as Edward," I said genially. Edward stepped into the house and moved to shake hands with Charlie.

"Thank you for letting me borrow Bella tonight, Chief." Charlie's face was stoic.

"Curfew is eleven. No drinking, no drugs and no sex. Am I clear?" Edward's smile grew brighter.

"Ten-four, Chief." Charlie rolled his eyes and we made our way outside.

"Holy sh*t," Charlie murmured as he crossed over the threshold. His eyes were locked on the car Edward had arrived in and I looked at it in confusion. "Is that an Aston Martin Vanquish?"

"Sure is, Chief. I'm just borrowing it from my father for the night. I wanted to make sure Bella arrives at the dance in style." I leveled him with a glare.

"You make sure you obey the speed limit, son," Charlie said, attempting to inject some of the intimidating grumpiness from before but falling short as he stared at the car in reverence.

"I promise that Bella will be perfectly safe with me," Edward assured him before leading me to the car. I stopped at the passenger side but Edward nudged me and I followed him to the driver's side with a frown.

"I am not driving this beast of a car," I told him. He smirked.

"First of all, I can't believe you would call this a beast considering the monster of a truck you get behind the wheel of every day. Second, you aren't driving. It's European. The driver is on the right." He pulled open the car door and I saw the luxury leather seats and the steering wheel on the wrong side of the car.

"The doors just open like a normal car? I'm already disappointed," I drawled, climbing into the car regally. He laughed and closed the door for me once I had cleared my voluminous skirts of the door. He jogged around to the other side with a wave at Charlie who was still watching the car with, what I could only uncomfortably call, lust. We pulled out of the driveway, Alice and Rosalie having already departed in Rose's car.

"So, what's the plan, Jeeves," I asked Edward as the car purred beneath us.

"I promised Esme that I would bring you over so we could get pictures together. She sort of wants to make a big deal out of it since I never participate in school activities." I bit my lip nervously, looking away from him and out the window.

"So, everyone's going to be there," I asked with forced calmness.

"Yeah. Get your red carpet smile ready, Swan." I took a deep breath to try and calm my nerves.

Carlisle was going to be there.

Which I would normally be thrilled about. I couldn't go to this dance with him but being able to show him that with an inhumane amount of torture, I could look like a semi-decent woman should have filled me with excitement. And it would have.

Except that I hadn't talked to Carlisle in a week.

It hadn't been intentional at first. At first, I was just so worried about Charlie and so mad that they hadn't called me or told me until after Alice's dress shopping trip was done. I hadn't even realized how angry with Carlisle I was until I saw him in the shadow of the hospital, trying to justify himself. And I knew it wasn't fair to expect him to drop everything in an emergency and call or text me to let me know what was going on. I knew that he had been rushing around trying to help the injured and save people. But even after Charlie had been released home with strict orders to take the next week off to recover, the anger hadn't dissipated. He'd tried calling and texting me, apologizing profusely for cutting me out.

But I was still angry.

I was angry that he'd colluded with Alice to keep me in the dark.

I was mad that he made the decision for me.

I was upset that Charlie had been injured.

I was hurt and betrayed that this was just another thing in a long list of things that Carlisle wasn't being honest about.

And that was the crux of it really. This came right on the heels of Edward's confession that Carlisle had put them under a gag order about whatever it was that made them… different. Superhuman. Impossible.

"Bella." Edward's voice broke through my heavy thoughts and I swung my eyes. "Is this going to be too much for you," he asked quietly. I looked around and realized that we were parked by his house. Rose's car was parked next to ours, presumably left out to take them to the dance.

"It's… it's fine," I said, voice strained. I expected him to give me some level of sass but he just stared at me, eyes guarded.

"Are you… are you going to dump my dad," he asked quietly. I sucked in a breath at the blunt question and then blew it out in a sigh.

"No. I don't know. I don't want to," I whispered. "I just feel so… so…"

"Betrayed," he offered. I slumped in my seat.

"I just don't want a relationship that's filled with lies and half truths," I mumbled.

"Hey, I get it. Really, I do. And for what it's worth, I don't think that Carlisle is doing this to be dishonest or hurtful. He's just scared and… unsure of what the right thing to do is. And he doesn't want to make the wrong decision and end up hurting you. Because I've known Carlisle a long time, Bella. But I've never seen him indecisive. I've never seen him so unsure about what to do. And I've never seen him so completely enchanted or smitten with anyone as he is with you." I blushed lightly. "You're so good for him, Bella. And I'm not asking you to sacrifice your own happiness or standards for him. I'm just asking that you give him a little grace because this is completely uncharted territory for him. And he's not a man to make a decision impulsively. Carlisle overthinkseverything. Well, except for medical care, but even then he's not frivolous. He's just such an ornery old man." I snorted out a laugh and a grin broke over his face. "Just… be patient with him?" I stared at him, head pressed against the seat as I registered how earnest he was.

"Okay," I said softly. He grinned, kissed my cheek and jumped out of the car, coming around to help me out. He rested my arm in his and led me up the porch steps and into the house.

"Honey, I'm home," he called out and Alice danced down the stairs to meet us. She still looked impeccable in her green dress. Almost like Tinkerbell. Jasper followed after her at a slower pace, dressed in a slim fit suit with tails and an elaborate vest under the jacket. Instead of a tie, he wore something similar to a cravat.

"Wow, Jasper, you look dapper," I complimented and he smiled, tugging at his suit coat.

"Thank you, Bella. You're looking very elegant this evening, if I might be so bold," he drawled with a slight bow.

"Hey, no Southern charm on her. That's all mine tonight," Alice reprimanded him with a pout. He grinned and pulled her to him, placing a kiss soundly on her mouth.

"That just happened," I muttered, looking away from them. Esme swept into the room from the stairs and pressed a hand to her chest.

"Bella, you look stunning," she said before pulling me into a hug and then stepping back with my hands in hers to take in my dress.

"All credit goes to Alice and Rose. This was an Eliza Doolittle level transformation." She laughed.

"You're selling yourself short," she chastised lovingly. "And Edward looks so handsome in his tuxedo." She turned to look at him and he grinned.

"I clean up nicely, if I do say so myself."

"When have you evernotsaid so yourself," I teased. He grinned unrepentantly.

"Well, I am an excellent judge."

"Sure you are, big guy," I said with a playful elbow to the ribs. He scowled at me. I looked around, half expecting to see Carlisle come in but so far it was just us. I ignored the feeling of disappointment that sank into my stomach like a stone. "Where are Emmett and Rosalie," I asked instead.

"Emmett's having trouble with his tie," Jasper explained and I smiled.

"Well, knots can be hard," I mocked.

"I heard that." Emmett and Rose came down the stairs and over to us. I briefly felt like a wilted flower in comparison to her with her perfect hair and long, slinky black dress. It didn't matter that we'd dressed together. She just looked like she belonged on a red carpet or in a magazine spread. Emmett looked surprisingly dapper in his black on black suit. "I'm surprised they decided to let you in, Swan. Aren't you a weapon of mass destruction if there's coordination involved?" I flipped him off and he laughed harder.

"Okay, enough teasing. Let's get some pictures," Esme said, pulling her phone out. "Girls, why don't you go first?" I lined up with Alice and Rosalie and smiled for the camera. As she began to rearrange us in different groups and set ups, I couldn't help but look around subtly for the head of the household.

"Carlisle is upstairs in his study," Edward murmured in my ear and I immediately dropped my gaze to my shoes. "I think Esme is done with us for right now. You could go see him," he suggested. I looked at him and then nodded slightly. I crossed the room to the stairs, peeking back to see if they were watching but Edward had jumped into a shot with Rose and Emmett and they were bickering about it. I walked up the stairs carefully, more grateful than ever that I wore sensible shoes. When I reached the third floor, I approached the wooden door to the study, heart thundering in my chest and palms growing sweaty. I lifted my hand to knock and hesitated.

What would I even say to him?

I steeled my resolve and knocked on the door before I could stop myself.

"Come in," came the muffled voice from the other side. I turned the knob and slowly opened the door, slipping inside and then closing it behind me. Carlisle looked up from his desk and froze.

"Hi," I said softly. His eyes moved over me, taking in every detail before settling on my face.

"Wow," he breathed. "Bella, you are… breathtaking." I warmed under the compliment and stepped away from the door.

"It's hard to look bad after Alice and Rosalie get their hands on you," I deferred.

"It's hard to improve on a masterpiece," he said and the words went right to my heart, healing some of the hurt that had been growing there. "Am I stealing you from Edward," he asked after a moment and I almost imagined there was a jealous edge to his voice.

"Yes, but you can't steal something that wants to be stolen, I think," I assured him, settling into a seat across from the desk. He smiled to himself and I felt struck with longing.

Imissedhim.

"Bella, I owe you an apology," he began but I shook my head.

"Can we… can we not tonight," I asked. He stopped and watched me while I twisted my hands together. "It's not that I don't want to hear it. I just… I didn't mean to be so distant this last week. I know you were overrun and that he didn't want me to worry. I just didn't realize how… angry I was until after the dust settled and then it was like it just kept festering in me." I snuck a glance at him and his eyes were locked onto me, regret coloring his features.

"I've made a mess of this, haven't I," he asked after a moment. I bit my lip, unsure of how to answer. Assurances rested on the tip of my tongue but I held them back, needing to communicate my needs to him.

"I think we're both just in new waters," I told him. "This is new to me and I… I just want to make sure that no one gets hurt." His gaze softened.

"As loathe as I am to admit it, this is all rather new to me as well and I find myself not entirely sure what I'm doing." I smiled at him softly, moving over his tousled hair, like he'd been running his hands through it. He looked tired. His eyes were dark -darker than their normal honey color -and there were dark circles under them. "Can you just promise not to tell Edward I said that. I can't even manage the levels of unbearable he'd become were he to know that he was right and I needed to rely on his advice." I chuckled and he grinned. It was like the sun breaking through the clouds, lighting his face. He stood and walked around the desk to stand in front of me. I stood up, unable to look away from his face. "You really do look enchanting tonight," he murmured, running his fingers down my cheek.

"I kind of wish I was going with you tonight and not Edward," I breathed. He smiled slightly, his face moving closer to mine.

"That's completely understandable. Edward is terrible company in comparison." His face hovered so close to mine, his breath fanning my face and making my heart flutter in anticipation.

"And I can't do this to Edward," I muttered before pressing my lips to his. His arms came around my waist, holding me to him as our mouths moved against each other. I lost myself in the kiss, reveling in the way my heart seemed to heal under his ministrations. A knock on the door interrupted us too soon.

"Bella, we need to go," Edward said from the other side and I moved to pull away but Carlisle stopped me, holding my face to his. He pulled back long enough to shout, "she's occupied" before crashing his mouth back to mine.

"Well she better hope that her occupation doesn't ruin her hair or makeup or Alice will be out for blood."

"Go away, Edward," I yelled and Carlisle grinned against my lips. The door swung open and Edward leaned against the frame.

"This is disgusting," he teased. I turned my back on him but Carlisle was already pulling away, leaning against his desk, shooting daggers at Edward.

"No one invited you," I said rudely but he just laughed.

"We have to go if we're going to make a splash before your curfew hits."

"You can go splash by yourself. I'll stay here."

"Seriously, Bella. You and Carlisle can suck face later." I twined my fingers with Carlisle's and he gave me a regretful smile.

"Go. Have fun and stay safe. We can pick this up later. And… talk maybe." I leaned in and gave him a soft kiss before pulling back reluctantly and following Edward out of the room. "If anything happens to her, I'm going to murder you, put you in my trunk and help them search for the body, Edward," he called as we descended, and I laughed.

"C'mon, Bella. Let's go stoke the gossip mills at Forks High," he said, tossing an arm around my shoulder.

Chapter 23: Fireflies

Chapter Text

Hello lovely people of the interwebs. Sorry for the delay in posting. Writing has become quite the luxury these days. So I literally just spend most of the time with a thousand and one ideas bouncing around my head and never enough time to put them to paper... er... computer. But enjoy! I'm already working on the next chapter so you won't have to wait as long!

The song for this chapter is Fireflies by Stephan Moccio.

Connect with me!

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Twenty-Three: Fireflies

BPOV

Hell would freeze over before I would ever trust Edward Cullen again.

And I'd run for mayor of Forks before I'd ever attend a stupid school dance again.

I told him it would end in injury.

But did he listen?

Of course not. Because no one couldpossiblyknow more than Edward Freaking Cullen.

We didn't even make it out onto the dance floor before I'd injured myself.

One minute, we're walking -okay, he was walking and sort of dragging me along behind him while I argued that this was a terrible idea -and the next, I'd rolled my ankle and couldn't walk without shooting pain.

Carlisle had NOT been happy.

Which was the only bonus to rolling my ankle at a school dance. Because he gave Edward an earful. The words 'send you to Alaska to get eaten by a polar bear' may have been mentioned.

It was glorious.

Not as glorious as being able to spend the evening making out with Carlisle in his library while Edward sulked before taking me home at an appropriate time and explaining to Charlie that I was a klutz but we'd still had a nice time.

Charlie hid a laugh and we'd spent all of Sunday taking it easy in front of the tv. He turned on sports and I read a book in companionable silence. It was actually nice to be able to share space with him while we both amused ourselves. Mom had always been loud and busy. She didn't stop long enough for a silence to form before she'd filled it or dragged me off to do something I definitely did not want to do. Charlie was content to just be near me without needing to talk or busy himself. I guess it was a personal trait that I realized made me more like him than I'd realized before now.

When I woke up Monday, my room seemed off and it wasn't until I'd rubbed my eyes and then flown to the window that I realized what was different.

The sun was out.

It wasn't the same as Arizona but I could imagine the brightness on the windowsill was settling into my skin and spreading through me, warming me from the inside. I felt the kind of beaming happiness like after Carlisle's kisses and rushed through getting ready for school, eager to share my joy with my friends.

Charlie didn't miss that I was more buoyant than usual but he seemed a little buzzed as he prepared for his first day back since the logging accident.

"What's got you glowing," he asked cheerfully as he poured himself some coffee. I didn't bother to hide my grin.

"The sun is out." He chuckled and shook his head.

"Even a rainy town like Forks gets sun sometimes," he pointed out good naturedly. I shrugged.

"It happens so rarely, it feels as exciting as Christmas," I admitted as I pulled toast from the toaster and started buttering it.

"It is pretty rare. Just don't go running off to the woods. Lots of people think that since it's nice, they can get lost in nature and usually just end up getting lost."

"Dad, I'm happy it's sunny but even that couldn't convince me to gohiking," I assured him with an exaggerated shudder. He laughed before standing up and kissing me on the head.

"Just be safe," he muttered against my hair. He was suddenly serious, a dark undertone edging his voice. I turned to ask him about it but he was already heading for the door, grabbing his keys and leaving. I frowned at the wall separating the kitchen and front door for a few moments before shoving aside my worries. He was probably just concerned since I'd already hurt myself within the last few days.

I drove to school, still reveling in the bright sunshine that almost gave the trees a green glow. When I arrived, I realized that I wasn't the only one excited about the change in weather. Several people were wearing shorts and tank tops. That was maybe a little too optimistic but I couldn't begrudge anyone their happiness at a change from the misty drizzle that seemed to settle permanently over this part of the world. I parked and climbed out of my truck, looking around the lot for Edward's car or Emmett's Jeep but they weren't there. I shrugged it off as the bell rang. They must have been running late.

When Government rolled around and Edward didn't show up, I started to get worried. I pulled my phone out discreetly.

Hey. Where are you? Did Carlisle follow through on his Alaska threat? Thought you'd at least say bye first.

I sent the text message to Edward and then put my phone away, trying to focus on the lesson.

Edward didn't text me back. By lunch, I was ready to grill his siblings about his absence but when I got to the lunchroom, our table was empty. I looked around to see if they were in line to get food -even though they never really ate it -but there wasn't any sign of them. I moved robotically through the lunch line and then took my tray of food to my seat, anxiety souring my appetite. Ten minutes passed and none of the Cullens showed up. I pulled my phone out and texted Edward again.

"It's sunny." I looked up to see Angela Webber standing in front of the chair by mine.

"Yeah," I said, unsure of where this conversation was going.

"Doctor Cullen and his sister always excuse their kids from school when it's sunny," she said, taking a seat. I noticed her boyfriend -Ben? -sit next to her, engrossed in a comic book.

"Really? That seems a bit of an extreme reaction to sunlight. And I'm from the desert." She laughed and shrugged.

"I guess they'rereallyoutdoorsy. They go camping and hiking and all sorts of stuff. I think. Didn't they tell you they weren't going to be here?" I ran my fingers over my phone lightly.

"No," I said softly. "But it's not a huge deal. I'm sure I can survive the day without them." Angela eyes me thoughtfully.

"I know you guys are really close. I'm happy they found someone they could be comfortable with. Ever since they moved in…"

"What," I prompted, my interest fully peaked.

"Maybe it's because they're different or because people think it's weird that a brother and sister would raise their kids together, in the same house… but they sort of give off this vibe. Like…," she squinted at the window, face scrunched as she tried to find the words, "they're dangerous, I guess? But that doesn't really make sense. They just make people uncomfortable, I think."

"Not everyone," I muttered, my eyes landing on Jessica and Lauren across the room. Angela followed my gaze and huffed a laugh.

"Yeah well, they've been interested in anything new and shiny since we were in preschool. It has less to do with who the Cullens are and more to do with the fact that they were new. And wouldn't give either of them the time of day. That's part of the reason why you guys didn't really get along once they found out the Cullens liked you."

"Well, not everyone can love me. I'm not pizza." We laughed and she sat back, giving me a wide smile.
"I'm sorry I haven't really gotten to know you." I started to wave off her apology but she held up a hand. "I know you have friends. But I just… don't want you to think that everyone here is the same as the people you already met and… didn't get along with. I think you and the Cullens are a good fit but if you ever feel lonely or the sun comes out, just know that I'm around and I won't be mad that you and Edward Cullen are an item." I smiled softly at her.

"Thanks," I murmured, throat thick. "I haven't had the easiest time here. But it is good to know that the way… certain people feel isn't the general consensus. Although I'm sure that tomorrow, things will be back to normal." She shrugged and then we spent the rest of lunch talking about our favorite books.

~~~STY~~~

Tuesday dawned as bright and cloudless as the day before. I frowned at my phone, reading through the unanswered messages to Edward and Alice. I'd even texted Carlisle, unsure if he had evaded work in favor of the excellent weather. But no one had responded. I could feel a pity party trying to get into full swing in my brain and immediately tried to squash it. They were probably out of cell service. If they'd done like Charlie and Angela had described, they were undoubtedly out in the woods and mountains, away from civilization and unable to get their text messages.

But a small -okay, medium -part of me felt hurt at being left behind without a word. Would it have killed Edward to let me know they were leaving?

Or Carlisle?

I banished the morose thoughts to the back of my mind and focused on school that day. Angela came and sat with me at lunch again and we discovered that we had a lot in common. She was also a homebody who preferred books over school dances -though that hadn't stopped her from going to the last one with Ben. Lunch passed by quickly, her company easing the pang of loneliness that felt similar to the drizzly mist I was so used to.

After school, I lounged around the house, unsure of what to do with myself. After I finished laundry and homework, I found myself staring at my phone, willing a message to appear. After ten minutes, I sighed and grabbed a blanket and a book, heading out to the backyard. I spread the blanket out and reclined across it, soaking up the sun. I opened my book and lost myself in the story.

At some point I must have fallen asleep. When I woke up, the sun was starting to set and the temperature was beginning to drop. I sat up quickly, glancing around the tree line. Charlie's house backed the forest and as a child, I had been scared to enter the woods, convinced that there would be trolls or big, bad wolves waiting for me. I'd eventually grown out of those fears but now, they flooded back to me as I heard something crashing around in the bushes, breaking twigs.

"Hello," I called out tentatively, praying that nothing answered, heart pounding. The crashing grew louder and I grabbed my blanket and book, prepared to barricade myself in the house. A dark figure burst through the tree line and I gave an involuntary scream before I stopped, squinting at the mass on the ground. It reared its head and I froze.

"Rachel?"

Chapter 24: Change On The Rise

Chapter Text

Oh hey guys! Um. Don't hate me. I ended up getting sick and then going on vacation right after. Still have a lingering cough. So that's fun. Plus, Carlisle and I had an argument about his attitude. Thankfully, Emmett and Jasper intervened or there might not be a hero for this story anymore. Who's ready for some mounting tension and conflict?!

The song for this chapter is Change On The Rise by Avi Kaplan.

Connect with me!

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Twenty-Four: Change On The Rise

CPOV

“Are you going to sit around and mope the whole time or were you planning on joining us?” I didn’t bother turning around at the sound of Esme’s voice. She approached and settled on the rocky cliff next to me. Wind whipped at our hair and clothes, futilely trying to blow us from our perch. I gave her half a smile.

“I find that I’m preoccupied,” I admitted and she snorted.

“Really, Carlisle, none of us have noticed.” I turned a raised brow to her and she smiled. “I guess Bella’s sarcasm is catching,” she teased and I grinned.

“I should be upset but it almost feels like she’s lit up the whole family.”

“Hmm, I know what you mean. I’ve never seen Edward so animated. It frustrates him at times but he’s told me what relief her mental silence provides. He enjoys the quiet. I keep a calm mind around him but I can only imagine the kind of solace that she provides, giving him absolute peace.”

“Careful, Esme, I might worry that your husband is going to steal my girl away from me,” I teased and she elbowed me gently.

“She’s been so good for Rosalie as well.” My laughing quieted as I stared at the vista of mountains, forest and ocean before us. “She’s really helped her open up. I’ve loved having her so involved in the family. Before… she really kept to herself. I worried about her; that she doesn't feel connected to us.” I rested my hand on her knee.

“No one could feel unconnected with you around, dearest,” I assured her and she gave me a wavering smile.

“You always see the best in people, Carlisle Cullen. But you can’t deny Bella’s influence on all of us. Jasper hasn’t struggled as much since she started coming around. And you.” I scoffed.

“If anything, I think Bella’s presence has made me more erratic, irrational and territorial. I’m sure all of you are ready to hog tie me and toss me over the treaty line.” She chuckled.

“You are a bit more possessive but… you seem more… alive. You laugh more. You smile almost all the time. You engage with the children. Not just in conversation or hunting trips, but you tease them and seek them out.”

“I just worry what will happen when…”

“When she finds out about us? It won’t be pretty. Bella is strong but she values honesty. She’s already confided in Edward that she’s worried your relationship will be too much of a strain and inevitably drive you to hate each other.” My heart trembled at the thought of hurting Bella or the impossibility of hating her.

“It’s safer for her to not know the truth,” I said but even I could admit the words rang false.

“When are you going to stop lying to yourself, Carlisle? You know that Bella is in this for good. She won’t grow to hate you or grow tired of you. While we can’t take Alice’s visions as gospel, the fact that the majority of them are of you two together for eternity should be enough to convince you to do right by her.” I snorted.

“If you wanted me to do right by her, we should have packed up and left right after Edward tried to kill her.”

“And if we’d done that, then Edward would have eventually snuck back to Forks and murdered her,” she said flatly and I flinched, snarling at the thought of Edward’s teeth ripping the delicate skin of Bella’s neck, drinking the ambrosia that pumped through her veins.

“For hell’s sake, Carlisle, could you not think about that,” Edward yelled from his vantage point fifty feet away where Emmett was taunting and wrestling a bear. “I’ve done a remarkable job so far of resisting her and I love her too much now to hurt her but you thinking about the intimate details of my draining her is a little more than my self-control can handle!” I forced myself to calm down and think about mundane things.

“I apologize, Edward. That was unfair of me.”

“Not as unfair as this stupid idea you’re holding onto about keeping Bella in the dark,” Alice sang from the tree branch above Edward’s head where she was lounging.

“Please, children, can we not have this argument again? We came out here to enjoy the sunshine and re-energize. I know being around Bella isn’t the easiest for you.”

“Speak for yourself, old man. I have no problem controlling myself around Bella,” Jasper drawled from the branch behind Alice.

“Yeah, we know what she is to you and none of us want to be the reason you end up as the kindling for s’mores,” Emmett huffed, ducking out of the way of the bear’s swiping paw.

“Emmett, haven’t I taught you better than to play with your food,” Esme teased. He grinned.

“They taste better when they’re angry.”

“Look, we know that you think that if we don’t tell her, Bella will never find out about us. But that is just a horrific complication waiting to happen. Because there’s no way that she doesn’t find out somehow. She already asks me a million questions about how I stopped that van. Bella is tenacious and intelligent. She knows that you are keeping a secret from her. And even if she can reconcile that knowledge right now, she won’t always be willing to overlook the blatant signs that you are keeping something from her. And if you keep lying to her to keep the secret, when she does find out -and I do mean when -it’s going to be about a million times worse than it needs to be because not only will she be coming to terms with the fact that we’re vampires but she’ll also feel totally and utterly betrayed by all the lies you told her. And she’ll remember them. Every. Single. One.”

Guilt soured in my stomach as I considered the grim picture he painted. I hated lying to Bella. But how on earth was I supposed to break the news that not only is her boyfriend a three hundred something year old vampire but so are her best friends? The entire task seemed daunting and fraught with the eventuality that Bella would think we were insane and try to have us committed.

“So little faith in the woman you love,” Edward grumbled and I imagined tying him up and tossing him over the treaty line. He laughed loudly. “I could probably talk my way out of that.”

“You could talk your way out of a firing squad,” I retorted. He waggled his eyebrows at me.

“I’ve talked my way out of a lot of things.” I rubbed my eyes tiredly.

“Why did I think you would make a good companion?”

“Because I’m awesome?” I chuckled and watched as Emmett finally killed the bear he’d been taunting and began to drink from it.

“Alice, is the weather still sunny tomorrow,” Esme asked as she swung herself up onto the same tree branch as Edward.

“For the beginning of the day, yes, but then it should become overcast and rainy in the afternoon. We could potentially go to our last few classes with no issue.”

“Hey, what did you tell Bella we were doing so that I can make sure our stories align when I see her tomorrow,” Edward asked me. I frowned.

“What do you mean? I didn’t tell her anything. I thought you or Alice texted her.” Everyone went still as they stared at me. “What?”

“You didn’t text or call her before we left,” Rosalie practically screamed.

“Was I supposed to?” Jasper buried his face in his hands.

“God, Carlisle, I know this is your first relationship but even you should know that communicating with your significant other is the top priority,” he complained.

“I assumed Edward or Alice would text her since they talk so often.”

“But you’re her boyfriend! You should be telling her things, not us.” Edward groaned.

“So… no one told Bella we were leaving and she’s spent the last two days wondering where we are and why no one is talking to her,” Emmett asked. My eyes widened with realization.

“Oh,” I said quietly.

“Yes, Carlisle. Oh.” Alice whipped her phone out and swore. “I don’t have any reception out here. You’re going to have to run somewhere with service and make contact. She’s probably already tried to get a hold of us all.” They all turned to stare at me expectantly.

“Right, I’m going. Does… does someone want to come with me to help me decide what to say,” I asked quietly.

“You really are hopeless at all this, old man,” Edward teased, swinging down gracefully from his tree and landing effortlessly beside me. “Let’s just hope that Bella will be forgiving. She is… kind of terrifying when she’s mad. Which no one will tell her I admitted to or your deepest secrets become public knowledge,” he said pointedly to his siblings who grinned in reply.

Chapter 25: Hello Lacrimosa

Chapter Text

Originally this was going to be the next chapter but then I figured, we should see why no one was talking to Bella. I have been WAITING for this chapter (and a lot of the chapters that follow it) for FOREVER! When I first started this story (almost a year ago. So much for accountability), I knew how I wanted this to play out. And it just got better and better.

The song for this chapter is Hello/Lacrimosa by The Piano Guys.

Connect with me!

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Twenty-Five: Hello Lacrimosa

BPOV

“Rachel?”

“Bella?” The mass of shadow and branches fumbled around until it separated into two separate bodies. Rachel Black stood up and walked toward me. “Bella Swan! What are you doing here?”

“What am I doing here? I live here! What are you doing here? Why are you tramping around in the forest behind my house at this time of night? Are you crazy?”

“Ugh, we were on our way back from Port Angeles and my car broke down on the side of the road. We called someone but I thought that we might be able to walk over to the auto shop. Apparently, we got turned around.”

“Who’s with you,” I asked, looking around her. Her friend was brushing sticks out of her hair. “Leah? Is that you?” She looked up at me and grinned.

“Hey, Bella! Long time, no see. How are you doing? I heard you moved up to live with your dad. Sorry about your mom.”

“Yeah, that sucks,” Rachel said and I smiled half-heartedly.

“Yeah, it’s been hard. Do you guys want to come in and wait for your ride here? I was just about to start dinner.”

“Oh my god, yes,” Leah groaned. “Anything but walking in circles in the woods.” They followed me into the kitchen and collapsed on chairs. Leah took her shoes off and began to rub her feet.

“It’s been forever since I saw you guys. How are you? What have you guys been doing,” I asked as I began to pull out ingredients for fajitas.

“I started college last fall,” Rachel said.

“Wow. That’s crazy. I feel like we were just kids running around the reservation and getting into trouble.”

“Hey, you’re the only one who got into trouble. No one ever caught us,” Leah teased and I laughed.

“I’m sad to report that my clumsiness hasn’t gotten any better with age.” They laughed and stood up, grabbing glasses and filling them with water. “What about you, Leah?”

“School. Not much going on around the rez.”

“Same. Charlie’s been working some crazy hours and some nights I wish the laundry would just swallow me whole.”

“Ugh, I come home to do laundry and make sure that my dad and Jake are doing okay. I wish I lived in a nudist colony,” Rachel said with a grimace.

“It’s too cold for a nudist colony here,” I pointed out as I tossed sliced onions, peppers and steak into a pan. I grabbed tortillas to warm them.

“True,” she conceded with a laugh.

“So college, huh. What are you studying?”

“I’m going into education.”

“A teacher? Wow. What subject?”

“Elementary education. I like kids. And honestly, the idea of teaching teenagers terrifies me.”

“Only because you’d have the boys falling over themselves trying to impress you,” Leah said with a laugh and Rachel shuddered dramatically while I laughed.

“I didn’t like teenage boys when I was in high school and honestly, I don’t think I’ll like them any better as I get older.”

“What’s Rebecca up to these days?”

“She’s married.”

“She’s married?!”

“Yeah, last year. Todd. He’s a cool guy. They’re expecting their first baby in a few months.”

“A baby,” I said faintly. “It’s weird to think Rebecca is old enough to have a baby.”

“I know. She keeps trying to set me up with Todd’s single friends but I’m not really interested in all that. She was always the one who wanted to get married and have kids.”

“So no boyfriend back at school,” I teased, nudging her side. She laughed.

“Nope. I am single and I am happy with that.”

“What about you, Leah? Special someone in your life?” Leah adopted a silly grin.

“Yeah. His name is Sam. He’s a bit older but honestly, I love him. He keeps me grounded. I don’t know what I’d do without him.”

“I still can’t believe you and Sam Uley are dating,” Rachel admitted. “He was such a goofball in school.”

“Yeah but he’s really sweet. I could see myself marrying him one day,” Leah admitted quietly.

“Wow, it sounds serious.” She nodded shyly and I pulled her into a hug. “I’m so happy for you, Leah. You deserve a really great guy.” She pulled back and grinned.

“What about you, Bella? Any of these boys in town catch your eye?” I blushed against my will and she crowed. “Someone did! Spill! Who is it?” I hesitated, wanting so badly to talk about Carlisle the way she’d talked about her boyfriend. My phone rang, saving me from answering. I looked at the screen.

CC.

Carlisle.

I gestured for them to start eating while I stepped out of the room, answering the phone and holding it to my ear.

“Hi,” I said, maybe a little shortly. In the excitement of my old friends showing up, I had forgotten that the Cullens had left without saying anything but seeing his name rekindled some of my annoyance.

“Bella, I am so, so sorry. I was going to text you and tell you that we were leaving for a camping trip while the weather was nice but I assumed that Edward or Alice had already told you. It was completely my mistake. I feel awful. Please forgive me.”

“I can’t say I haven’t felt a little… left out of the loop or abandoned,” I mutter into the phone, trying to hold back the hurt but I know it seeps into my voice.

“I’m so sorry, darling. This is my fault.”

“You aren’t required to tell me everything you’re doing.”

“But I should have told you. Edward has been telling me that I’m bungling this relationship thing. I fear that I am. I’m so sorry. From now on, I will tell you everything instead of assuming someone else will.”

“Even though I missed you guys, it did give me the opportunity to get to know a couple of the kids here. You know, the ones who don’t hate my guts already.”

“That’s good. I’m afraid I’ve been rather poor company here. I miss you so much that Edward and the others keep accusing me of moping and sulking.”

“I miss you, too,” I said softly. “Although I don’t know how anyone could be worse company than Edward.”

“Hey, I heard that,” I hear Edward yell from somewhere nearby. I laugh to myself.

“Good. I wouldn’t want distance from me to give you the delusional idea that I might actually like you or miss you.” There was a scuffle on their end and I laughed as Carlisle and Edward threatened and insulted one another.

“Do you know when you’ll be back,” I ask after it quiets down.

“Probably tomorrow. This good weather is coming to an end, I’m afraid.”

“I never thought that I would wish for more rain in Forks but for some mysterious reason, I find myself upset with the sunshine and praying for a downpour.” He chuckled warmly in my ear and warmth bubbled in my chest. Leah and Rachel’s laughter broke through my focus and I jumped a little.

“It sounds like you have company.”
“Yeah, a couple of old friends showed up unexpectedly.”

“Well, I shan’t keep you from them. I just… I’m sorry that I haven’t been meeting your expectations in this… relationship. I guess Edward is right and I am an old man who needs his help.”

“My only expectation is that you exist and continue being yourself. I’m no expert at relationships myself. Also, maybe don’t listen to Edward because the only advice that he could possibly offer would probably give me homicidal tendencies since that’s how I feel with all his other advice.” His rich, full laugh filled the line and I wanted nothing more to be pressed against his chest or in his arms, watching his face light up with laughter.

“Oddly enough, I feel the exact same way. Go have a nice time with your friends. And take care of yourself. I’d hate to come back and have to sew an arm or a leg back on,” he teased gently and I rolled my eyes.
“You know I haven’t lost a limb yet, right?”

“An accomplishment for which I am extremely grateful and hopeful that it remains that way.”

“You’re ridiculous. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Goodnight, sweetheart.”

“Goodnight, handsome.” I hung up and took a steadying breath before heading back into the kitchen.

“Ooooh girl, you better spill right now,” Leah said.

“What?”

“You have got the sappiest smile on your face right now,” Rachel said with a smug grin.

“What? No I don’t.”

“You do too! Now tell us who the hunky guy on the other end of that phone call was or I’m going to summon our wolf spirit ancestors to whip your ass until you do.”

“Fine.” I paused and they both leaned back and crossed their arms over their chests, leveling me with equally unamused looks. “It’s Edward Cullen,” I said quickly, hating that I had to lie to two of my closest friends growing up.

“You’re dating Edward Cullen,” Leah screeched. I leaned away from her warily.

“Um. Yes?”

“Holy sh*t, Bella,” Rachel breathed. “Does your dad know?”

“Yeah. He likes Edward. Well sort of. He doesn’t dislike Edward.”

“Does my dad know,” Rachel asked.

“I-I don’t think so. Why?”

“Because he would flip the crap out if he knew that his best friend’s daughter was dating one of the Cold Ones,” Rachel said with a laugh.

“The what?”

“C’mon, Bella, you remember the fireside stories with the elders,” Leah teased. I tried to remember back to the nights I would spend on the reservation while Charlie worked.

“Vaguely, I guess. I remember that there were a few nights where we had sleepovers and we’d all sit around the campfire and the adults would tell stories. But I don’t remember any of the stories. What does any of that have to do with the Cullens?”

“We have this old legend about our ancestors. They could turn into wolves to protect the tribe. And their greatest enemy was the Cold Ones.”

“What are Cold Ones?”

“Vampires,” Leah said with a skeptical laugh.

My world grinded to a halt.

Vampires.

Snippets of memory came floating back to me as Rachel told the story of one of her ancestors fighting off a deranged vampire and turning into a wolf to tear her to pieces.

“What does that have to do with the Cullens?”

“Legend on the rez is that the Cullens are Cold Ones who showed up when my great-grandfather was chief and claimed to be different. They only drank the blood of animals. Grandpa Ephraim made a treaty with them that they wouldn’t bite any humans and they would stay off our land. It split the reservation and the town up so that there wouldn’t be any fighting.”

“You’re suggesting that the Cullens have lived here since your great grandfather was chief and no one has noticed?”

“No. They left for a while and only came back recently. Most of us don’t believe it. But the elders refuse to come into town to the hospital here because Doctor Cullen works there and they don’t trust him.” I sat back, mulling on the information dump I’d just received.

“If they were vampires, wouldn’t they have to stay indoors and sleep during the day?”

“In our legends, Cold Ones can walk in the daylight. They’re superhumanly fast and strong. They’re pale and have red eyes and they are cold like stone and can’t be harmed except by our wolf’s teeth and by fire. It honestly sounds like a way to justify racial prejudices amongst the older generations but my mom used to tell us that if we didn’t go to bed or eat our vegetables that the Cold Ones would come for us.”

Cold skin.

Superhuman strength.

Impossible speed.

Strange eyes.

Pale.

The room seemed to spin as my mental list of oddities about the Cullen family and what Edward had done fell into place against this new information.

Could it really be this, though? Vampires? The idea seemed utterly outrageous.

And yet…

I’d watched Edward push the van away from me. I’d watched him lift it and move me out of harm’s way. He’d been too far away to get to me at human speed but he’d been at my side in mere seconds.

The family all looked the same but the illness that Carlisle had claimed to share with them had yielded no results except leeches and…

Blood deficiency.

Had Carlisle told me exactly what they were in a clever, made-up medical condition?

Leeches.

Bloodsuckers.

It seemed so obvious if you chose to believe that things like vampires existed.

Did I believe in vampires?

“Hello, earth to Bella,” Leah said, snapping her fingers in front of my face. I snapped my attention to her. “Don't worry, Bella. No one but the elders think that the Cullens are actually Cold Ones. I doubt he’ll suck your blood. Might give you a big, ole hickey though,” she said with a wink. I forced a smile.

“Yeah. I guess it’s just weird to know that people could think that about them.”

“Don’t get me started. My dad has been so paranoid since they moved back in. It’s the stupidest thing. We’ve had to drive twice as far for his doctor appointments and we’ve had lots of arguments about it before I left for school.”

“Yeah,” I said faintly, mind still whirring with the reintroduction of information that I’d been given as a child. Leah’s phone buzzed on the table.

“That’s Sam. He’s out front. Thank you so much, Bella. It was so good to see you again. Next time your dad goes fishing, you should come down. We can hang out.” She gave me a hug and I squeezed her back on instinct.

“Seriously, next time I come back, I’ll text you. We can all go see a movie or something,” Rachel promised and I nodded and hugged her as well.

“It was really great to see you guys again. I’d love to get together. And, um, can you guys not say anything about me and… Edward? I just really don’t want to deal with a whole bunch of Charlie’s friends butting their noses into our relationship.”

“Are you kidding? If I told dad, he’d probably have an aneurysm. I’m annoyed with him but I don’t want to kill him,” Rachel joked and I smiled wanly. They headed down the porch steps to a car waiting in the driveway and climbed in. I waved until they had headed down the street and out of sight.

I went inside and locked the door, robotically cleaning up our mess in the kitchen and then heading upstairs, head churning with memories and questions. When I got to my room, I closed the door and paced the floor while I tried to sort through the jumble in my head.

According to the Quileute legends, Cold Ones had cold, pale skin. Their eyes were usually red but the Cullens had yellow eyes because they drank animal blood.

The Cullens all shared the exact same alabaster pallor and ochre eyes. But sometimes, their eyes darkened. Was this what happened when they didn’t eat? Usually when Edward’s eyes darkened, he was short tempered and impatient.

Was that vampire equivalent of being hangry?

They were so fast, it seemed like a blink of the eye.

Edward had moved the length of at least four cars before I could even blink.

They were supernaturally strong.

He’d lifted the van off me. Emmett had mysteriously put our cars on the roofs of the school buildings.

Their skin was hard and impenetrable. How many times had I shoved or playfully punched Edward or Emmett only to feel like I had just hit a statue? When I kissed Carlisle, it always felt like I was molding myself around him.

They were immortal unless they were torn to pieces and then burned.

Admittedly, I hadn’t experienced anything to back that up but I wasn’t blind to the way the Cullens stiffened when someone mentioned the tribe or the reservation.

After what felt like hours, I finally sat on the edge of the bed and held a hand to my mouth, holding back the words swirling in my head.

The Cullens were vampires.

This was the big secret that they were all keeping from me.

They were vegetarian vampires that chose to live in this small town and attend high school.

Edward’s reaction to me on my first day of school took on a whole new light.

Had he wanted to kill me then? Was he resisting the urge to drink my blood?

But if it was that hard for them to resist, then why put themselves in a school with hundreds of humans?

How did Carlisle handle being around blood at the hospital day in and day out? He’d stitched up my foot when I’d sliced it open and was bleeding profusely. He…

Carlisle.

My secret boyfriend was a mythical creature that drank blood.

Chapter 26: Funeral March

Chapter Text

After a most excellent review from last chapter, I have decided that y'all can address me as Your Majesty from here on out. That was some crazy stuff last chapter. This chapter will definitely be calmer... Yeah, I'm not lying.

The song for this chapter is Funeral March by 2WEI. Don't come at me; their music is perfect for setting a certain kind of scene.

Connect with me!

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Twenty-Six: Funeral March

Charlie POV

I sighed tiredly, rubbing my eyes as I took a break from the open casefiles in front of me.

Normally, I loved my job. Forks was a pretty quiet town, with minor disturbances. We usually saw a lot of lost hikers and campers. The occasional domestic dispute (or neighbors quarreling and using my office as their attempted method of punishment). Sometimes, we had trouble with tourists passing through but for the most part, this was a pretty easy gig.

But in the last few months, my job had become very different.

When the sheriff in Walla Walla had died in a fire, the state police had reached out to me, looking for an extra pair of eyes to assess the case and the recent string of crime in the area. I hadn’t thought much of it. It appeared to be an accident but there were suspicious elements.

The night we’d had dinner with the Cullens, my new non-emergent dispatcher had called me in a panic because she received a call from an untraceable number that she said I needed to listen to the recording of. So I’d left dinner and headed straight to the office, sure that she was worrying over nothing. But when I arrived at the office and she played the recording of the call, my blood froze.

“Forks Police Department, this is Cassie. Who am I speaking with?”

“Hello, Cassie. I’m calling with a message for Chief Swan.”

“Your name, please?” A sinister chuckle echoed across the line.

“Now where’s the fun in that?”

“Sir?”

“My message for your beloved chief is this: I’m new to town. I’ve been new to lots of towns and cities and everytime I arrive, I do my due diligence and give advance notice that I plan on doing crime in your little Forks.”

“What kind of crime, sir?”

“I’d hate to spoil the surprise. But needless to say, you’ll know I’m here. To Chief Swan I can only say this: Stop me. I dare you.”

“Sir, I-” The line went dead.

After the first few days passed, I began to wonder if it was a prank call. Some bored college student or high schooler who had too much time and maybe some drugs. But then I’d been called out to a home invasion in the center of town. Magda Jenkins had lived in town for longer than I’d been alive. We found her with her hands and ankles bound behind her back, a red bandana around her mouth, gagging her. The house had been trashed and a few possessions stolen, nothing really valuable. She didn’t know how he’d gotten in. But she said it was definitely a man whose face had remained completely covered. He’d spoken to her, polite and calm. He informed her of everything he was doing before or as he did it but threatened that if she screamed or refused to cooperate and obey him, he would kill her.

The crime scene was havoc but taped to the fire extinguisher in her kitchen, he’d left a note, addressed to me.

Chief Swan,

Such a charming town here. I hope you enjoyed my entrance. Magda is such a darling, bless her heart. But this is only the beginning for you and I. If a tree falls in the forest and there’s no one there to hear it, then how can you claim to uphold the oath you swore to the people of this town to protect them? I plan to fell many trees, Chief. The question is, are you smart enough to get there before me?

See you soon.

We’d managed to keep the crime under wraps, even convinced Magda to go visit her sister in St. Louis until we had this psychopath behind bars. And then we’d hit the ground running. We processed every single thing we found at the crime scene but there were no fingerprints. Canvassing ended with no leads. No one had seen anything unusual. No one leaving the premises or entering and no one that matched the description Magda gave us. We started processing the call he’d made when he arrived in town and the note he’d left for me. But a lot of it was just guesswork and profiling.

His use of the phrase ‘bless her heart’ led me to believe the perp was Southern or at least spent a good amount of time there. I was bothered that he referred to warning us of his intent to commit a crime as his ‘due diligence’. He obviously had run-ins with law enforcement. But it wasn’t until Bella had been telling Alice and Edward about some obscure law in Arizona that made it illegal to cut down or move a cactus that I wondered if this “notice” was an absurd law somewhere. One internet search later and I had pegged our guy for a Texan.

I had my team start running down possible perps but it wasn’t a lot to go off of. I had a visit from one of the state investigators over the Walla Walla case and while we were discussing the possibility of the other unusual crimes committed within a few weeks of his death being related, I realized that it seemed similar. The investigator checked if the sheriff there had received a message similar to the one I had received and a week later, we knew we were dealing with a serial killer. The state investigators reached out to the feds to see if his M.O. matched any of the crimes in their databases but that was a time consuming process. I knew in my gut that this guy was the same one who had murdered the sheriff in Walla Walla and I would bet my whole pension that this wasn’t anywhere close to his first time doing it.

With that in mind, I focused on the note he’d left for me, trying to get into his mindset and figure out what it meant. This guy was obviously clever. He wouldn’t have left a note if there wasn’t some hidden message to keep his game of cat and mouse going. I spent day after day trying to decipher what he was trying to tell me before someone else got hurt. I felt bad about how often I was leaving Bella, especially since I couldn’t tell her anything about this. It was a small comfort that Carlisle’s family had welcomed her into their fold and so I knew she wasn’t abandoned as this began to consume my life.

I finally thought I had cracked the code with the note about two weeks after getting it. I was pretty sure that he was referencing one of the logging outfits outside town. I didn’t have anything solid to go off of and so I went out to investigate for myself and see if I could catch him before he could hurt anyone else or do any damage.

I don’t know if he was watching me or my timing was just lucky. As I walked around the logging site, looking for any sign of tampering, I’d noticed that there was a light flashing on a knuckleboom loader that was placing logs in the pile. It was clearly an incendiary device but before I could warn everyone, the damn thing blew and unleashed hell.

I was stuck in the hospital for a couple days and forced to stay home for the rest of the week. I know I was lucky that I wasn’t more seriously injured, but I also knew that every minute I spent at home, the crime scene was getting colder and my perp could potentially disappear. I needn’t have worried. As soon as I got back to the office there was a voice message left for me on my private work line.

“Well, Chief Swan, wasn’t that exciting? That’s the closest anyone has come to stopping me since I started playing this game. I’m impressed. But you still failed. Maybe I should raise the stakes next time. After all, I’m burning with curiosity to see how close you can get to me before you crash and burn. Not unlike your buddy on the other side of the state. You see, Chief, I’ve challenged many officers like yourself and no one has been able to stop me yet. Will you be any different?”

I hit the ground running even harder. Carlisle had told me the extent of the damage from the logging accident and I certainly didn’t intend on allowing a repeat performance by this guy. His message also confirmed my suspicions that he might have been in Walla Walla before coming to Forks. I spent hours and hours trying to find the hidden meaning in this message. We were burning the candles at both ends, trying to ID this guy and get ahead of whatever sinister plans he had for my town.

I had a strong hunch that his next target was the elementary school building. I suspected that he planned to burn it down just like he’d done in Walla Walla, kids inside and all. We didn’t want to cause a panic because I figured that’s exactly what a criminal like him wanted. Chaos, notoriety, attention. We got in without raising a fuss and found makeshift combustibles in a custodian closet. One of my deputies used to be bomb squad and he got the thing dismantled before it could blow. Added bonus was we finally got the dirtbag on video. He was still masked up but now we had a body type and build to go off of.

That had been a few days ago and we still hadn’t heard anything from him, which seemed out of character. I didn’t slow down, hoping that we would finally catch a break and bring the asshole in.

“Got something for you, Chief,” one of the deputies said, carrying in a thin manilla envelope. I sighed and held out my hand, taking it and looking at the front. Just my name. Great. I undid the brad on the back, already wondering what Bella was making for dinner tonight and debating if I should try and make it home for once. I pulled the contents out of the envelope and set them on my desk.

I looked down and froze.

Pristine, clear pictures of Bella stared back at me. Taken from a distance but high quality, one showed Bella in the school parking lot, talking to her friends. Another was of Bella sitting in one of her classes, taken through a window as she bent over a book. The next was Bella, coming down the stairs at home, headed to her truck. The last was Bella sleeping in her room.

It had been taken from inside her room.

A sticky note was stuck to the top corner of the last one.

You finally get to walk your daughter down the aisle. Only she’s in a casket instead of a white dress. Not the image you had in mind, is it? You haven’t stopped me, Chief Swan. You just changed the game.

I jumped out of my seat.

“Who left this,” I thundered at the deputies, running for the front. Everyone stared at me bewildered.

“A messenger,” Coons, the one who’d handed it to me, said. I ran out the front door, looking all around the parking lot and street for a messenger van or bike.

No one was there.

Officers followed after me, asking questions with their hands on their weapons, alarmed by my manic display.

That bastard was targeting Bella.

My baby girl was in danger.

Chapter 27: As It Was

Chapter Text

Well, that was a little bit of a cliffie. But now the ball gets rolling since the secret is out! Hope you guys are strapped in and ready for the LONGEST chapter I have ever written EVVVVVER.

The song for this chapter is As It Was, originally by Harry Styles but covered by the Piano Guys.

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Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Twenty-Seven: As It Was
BPOV

I wasn’t completely sure how I should approach the Cullens with my newfound knowledge that they were vampires.

It’s not like Hallmark had a card for “so it turns out your big secret is that you are members of the legion of bloodsucking undead”.

Should I talk to Carlisle first or the kids?

If I admitted that I knew, would that be the end of our relationship?

Call me crazy, but learning that Carlisle Cullen was a vampire who was at least several decades old didn’t change my mind about him at all.

He was a wonderful man and the fact that he spent his time working in hospitals, healing humans, when he clearly didn’t need to, proved that he was compassionate and selfless. and…

Perfect.

Admittedly, there were still several holes in the story. So really the question was: who was more likely to give me the answers to my questions? Would Carlisle be honest and open with me if the burden of keeping the secret was lifted from his shoulders? Or would it be better for me to approach Edward or one of the kids first and get the truth from them so that I had a full picture when I talked to Carlisle about it?

I could already feel a headache coming on trying to figure everything out and the questions swirling in my head only made me feel fuzzier.

What would be the best way to approach this and let them know that I knew what they were?

I prided myself on being blunt and direct. But short of plopping down at lunch or in Biology and saying ‘so, suck the blood out of a living being lately?’, I wasn’t sure how to broach the subject without being completely shut down.

I sat in my room, staring at my overcrowded bookcase as I played through scenarios in my mind.

An idea began to form slowly and I squinted at the bookcase as a plan started building seamlessly in my head. A slow smile spread across my face and I hopped up and started moving around the house, gathering everything for school.

~~~~SIN~~~~

As predicted, I didn’t see the Cullens until lunch. I was sitting at our table, slowly working my way through the leftover spaghetti and meatballs from dinner the night before. Cold hands covered my eyes and I grinned at the sound of bodies hitting the chairs around me.

“Who’s your favorite,” Edward’s smug voice said in my ear and I hummed.

“Carlisle. Definitely,” I said quietly and he scoffed.

“So easily impressed by a pretty face,” he lamented. “Who’s your real favorite?”

“Oh, Jasper!” He pulled his hands off my face and flopped into the seat next to me, grumbling under his breath about ingratitude.

“I’m sorry we didn’t tell you we were leaving,” Alice said, reaching for my hand. “There was clearly a breakdown in communication. Sometimes, I think that Carlisle is as dumb as a bag of bricks.” I chuckle.

“Only when it comes to Bella,” Jasper pointed out with a teasing grin directed at me.

“I missed you guys. I honestly didn’t think I’d ever wish for rain in Forks of all places but knowing that good weather was keeping you guys away made me hate all the sun I’d been wishing for.”

“How did you survive without us,” Edward drawled and I rolled my eyes.

“Shockingly, my life doesn’t stop with the absence of Edward Cullen in it,” I deadpanned and he glared at me before grinning.

“We missed you, too. Carlisle moped around like an angsty teenager.”

“Oh, so he was doing an Edward impersonation,” I mocked and Emmett roared with laughter while slapping his leg. “Honestly, it was fine. I learned so many interesting things without you here distracting me,” I said innocently. His eyes narrowed at me.

“Like what?”

“Like that Forks High offers a Shop class. I didn’t know that. Why don’t any of you take Shop?” They stared at me in confusion. “Is it all the wood?” Their confusion grew and I shrugged.

“Are you telling me that you, Isabella Marie Swan, want to take Shop class,” Edward asked derisively. “I hate to spoil your dreams there, Bella, but I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t even let you in the classroom. And Carlisle would definitely stop you from being near heavy machinery. You know, given your penchant for injury and near death experiences.” They laughed and I rolled my eyes.

“I don’t want to take Shop. It was merely one of many observations I made while left to my own devices during your trip.”

“I always thought Shop class was kind of weird,” Jasper said. “I mean, when is knowing how to make a birdhouse ever going to come in handy? Wouldn’t it be better to make something useful, like furniture or something?” Rosalie started comparing her auto class with the shop class and I focused on my food. There was a feeling of wholeness being surrounded by them and I idly wondered if it was a vampire thing or just my weird brain.

Yeah, probably just me. Most people probably wouldn’t be quite so happy and content being surrounded by a group of vampires.

“Hey, Em, I’m too full to eat this garlic bread. Do you want it?” I held out the offered bread, watching him carefully.

“Thanks, Bella, but we stuffed ourselves before we came today,” he said, rubbing his belly exaggeratedly. “Plus, I’m planning on a full on makeout session with Rosie later and garlic breath is a killer.” I shuddered dramatically as Rose knocked him in the head fondly.

The bell rang and we went our separate ways. Edward walked with me to Biology and I caught him staring at me, brow slightly puckered in frustration. I pretended not to notice and took my seat, pulling out my books and papers, sliding the novel I brought with me under some notebooks as I prepared to take notes. Mr Banner called the room to order and started his lecture. Edward stared out the window and now that I watched him do it, I wondered if he did so well in class because he’d done it so many times before or if there were some other abilities at play that make it so he doesn’t have to pay attention at all.

I tapped his shoulder and he looked back at me. I slid a paper across the desk to him, slowly so as not to catch any attention from our teacher or classmates. I saw him look down and read my writing before frowning.

I know.

He looked back at me quickly and then grabbed his own pen and wrote something, sliding the paper back to me. I read his answer in a script that would make a calligrapher weep.

Know what?

I gave him a hard look and Mr Banner called on him to answer a question. While he was distracted with responding, I slid my novel out from under my notebook and placed it on the paper, sliding it back to him. He looked down and froze.

Like, deer in the woods, muscles locked, not-even-breathing froze.

His eyes slowly swung to mine and I gave him a calm, saccharine smile.

He grabbed his pen, opened the book and wrote inside it.

Part of me wanted to beat him senseless for defacing a novel, the barbarian.

The majority of me tensed, heart quickening, because that had to mean that it was real.

What Leah and Rachel told me was real.

While I knew that, there was some small part of me that considered it all too absurd to be true.

He slid the book and note back across the table at me and I reached out with slightly shaky hands. I opened the cover of Dracula to the title page and saw his scrawling signature under the text.

I rolled my eyes at him.

He stared at me intently and I carefully wrote on our note paper, glancing up at Mr Banner in case he noticed our silent conversation. I slid it over to him.

We need to talk about this. Meet at my truck after class.

He read it and nodded at me subtly, crossing his arms and sitting back in his chair.

The hour dragged on as Edward waited tensely in the seat beside me. When the bell finally rang, he was up and out of his seat, a hand under my elbow and leading me through the sea of students moving through the classroom and halls until we were standing outside my truck. I quickly unlocked the doors and he helped me in before climbing in on the other side.

“How long have you known,” he asked as my truck roared to life and I pulled carefully out of the parking lot and onto the street.

“Just since last night. I wasn’t sure how to… tell you.” He chuckled and shook his head.

“The wood in shop class and garlic bread,” he murmured and I grinned unrepentantly.

“Come on. That was hilarious. I mean, I know that a wooden stake to the heart won’t kill you but I have to admit, I was kind of curious about the garlic. I haven’t really seen you guys eat. Except for that dinner party we had.”

“Not to spoil your ideas about our diet but we didn’t actually eat at that dinner party.” I shot him a skeptical look. “We attached bags under the table before dinner so that we could discreetly dispose of the food we were given and make it look like we were eating.” I thought back to that night -you know, when I got my pants kissed off by his overwhelmingly attractive father figure -but I couldn’t recall any of them actually putting any food in their mouths. But they mimicked the action so well that I never suspected anything was wrong.

“Damn,” I breathed. “So, do you just not like human food? Because it’s not blood?” He pinned me with a hard look.

“Are you really being so cavalier about the fact that I drink blood to survive? You’re not going to ask if I’m dangerous or who’s blood I drink? How do you even know any of this anyway?” The more he spoke, the angrier he got until I thought that if I looked over at him, steam would be screaming out his ears. I parked in the driveway and cut the engine.

“Don’t mistake my attempts at humor for ignorance, Edward,” I snapped at him irritably. “I understand that there is no way that you could have told me this without me trying to have you committed but it doesn’t erase the fact that it was still a huge secret that you and your family kept from me. I feel like this colors every experience I’ve ever had with any of you and now I’m even more baffled as to why we’re friends.” Silence reigned in the truck.

“You’re right,” he said quietly. “What we are… it has affected our time with you. But it doesn’t change how any of us feel about you. There are things you don’t understand, that I am more than happy to explain, but let’s make something clear right now.” I stare at him, a lump forming in my throat as he stares back at me with the kind of intensity that is just purely Edward. “You are one of the smartest, funniest, sacrificing, persistent, annoying, loyal, loving young women I have ever met. I’ve met a lot of women, Bella.” I started to interrupt to ask just how many that is but he stopped me. “I’m not finished. You are all those things and more. We wouldn’t want anything less for the man who has sacrificed so much for our family. So I don’t know where this idea comes from that you are not good enough, Bella, because you. Are. Perfect. You are perfect for him and, selfish as it may seem, you are perfect for the rest of us. We’re friends because you’ve proven your worthiness a thousand times over and none of us could bear to part with you. You are exactly who we all need, Bella Swan. And I won’t hear another word demeaning you. Not even from your own lips.”

I turned my head away, wiping furiously at the tears that had formed during his impassioned speech and were tumbling over my cheeks. His hand pulled at my shoulder and I turned, burying my head in his shoulder, shaking from the sobs building in my throat. He gently held me, his hands rubbing up and down my spine in a soothing motion.

“Don’t cry,” he murmured against my hair. I huffed out a watery combination of a laugh and a sob.

My truck door flew open and I whirled around, finding Jasper and Emmett squeezing into the open space.

“You’re dead,” Emmett said flatly to Edward.

“Seriously, you keep making her cry, asshole,” Jasper hissed and my sobs turned to laughs as I held a hand up to them.

“He is an asshole,” I agreed and Edward made a noise of protest behind me, “but this time he said only good things. I’m crying because I’m obviously a hot mess.” I swiped a hand across my face and took a deep, calming breath. “What are you guys all doing here,” I asked after I’d calmed down, noticing Alice and Rose standing on the walk up to the door with matching faces of concern.

“Edward texted us. He said we needed to talk,” explained Rose and I looked back at him with an eyebrow raised. He shrugged casually.

“This is a family conversation.” I shrugged and climbed out of the truck, moving up the walkway to unlock the door and let everyone inside. They all hurried into the house and to the den. Rosalie sat in Charlie’s recliner with Emmett standing at her back while Edward and Alice settled onto the couch, Jasper perched on the arm behind her, leaving me the open space at the other end where I could sit and see them all as we talked.

I was suddenly overcome by a rush of nerves. It was one thing to talk to Edward about their big family secret but talking to all of them filled me with doubt.

“Okay, so what’s going on,” Jasper finally asked with a frown, staring at me as I started to freak out.

“Bella knows,” Edward said.

“Knows what,” asked Emmett. Edward glared at him.

“She knows,” he said meaningfully and I watched as comprehension dawned on all their faces.

“Are you sure? Maybe she just thinks she knows,” suggested Rosalie.

“I definitely know,” I said tersely.

“Yeah? What’s that,” asked Emmett but I could see the tightening around his eyes and the way he seemed to stand up taller and get even larger in the small room.

“I know that your family are vampires.” They stilled as the word hung in the air around us. “I know that most, if not all of you, are several decades old, at least. I know that’s how Edward saved me from Tyler’s van. You all have superhuman speed and strength. You don’t age. Your skin is cold, pale and your eyes change color based on when you’ve last… I don’t know, fed? I know that you have golden eyes because instead of hunting humans, you live off of animal blood. I know that you lived here before, a long time ago and now you’re back again. I know that you can only be killed by fire. I know that you can go out in the daylight and not turn into a giant pile of ash but that something must give you away and that’s why you couldn’t come to school the last two days while the weather was nice. I know you’re not really related or adopted but that Carlisle is the leader of your… coven.” They sat in shocked silence.

“Damn it, Edward, Carlisle’s instructions were explicit,” Emmett shouted and I watched in confusion as everyone but Alice turned to Edward, rage simmering in their eyes.

“I didn’t say anything,” he shouted back and Alice shook her head.

“He’s telling the truth. I would have seen it if it had been him.” That seemed to settle everyone and I gaped at them, even more confused.

Did she follow him around and spy on him to make sure this wouldn’t happen or something?

“Well then how the f*ck does she know all of those very specific details,” yelled Jasper. They all turned back to me and I bit my lip.

“How do you know all this, Bella? You never told me.”

“I sort of already knew but I didn’t know that I knew,” I said nervously.

“Explain,” Alice prompted curiously. She was the only one who seemed completely unbothered by this revelation.

“Last night, I unexpectedly reunited with some old friends of mine. From La Push.” It was like the air was sucked out of the room. “Rachel and Leah and I used to run around the rez with Rachel’s twin sister and little brother, Jake. We hung out when I occasionally stayed with my dad in Forks and he would go fishing with their dads. A couple of times, I was included when they would share their myths and histories around the campfire. There was a legend about their ancestors shifting into wolves to protect the tribe from the enemies they called the Cold Ones.”

“And you just happened to randomly remember these stories from when you were a little kid,” asked Jasper, incredulously. I shook my head.

“No. Rachel and Leah stayed for dinner last night when Carlisle called. I told them it was Edward and they were joking about dating a vampire.” I watched as Rosalie’s face darkened. “They don’t believe the legends. They think that it’s all prejudice that the elders have against Carlisle and you guys. Honestly, they were just teasing me but I couldn’t help but notice the truths in the myths and I started to sort of remember the stories we heard around the fire.”

“Why would you believe them,” Rosalie asked. “Even with the oddities, vampire is a pretty big leap of faith.”

“I’ll tell you why. It’s because Superboy over there exposed himself to her and so it was easier for her to believe it after she’d seen it with her own eyes,” Emmett barked.

“Okay please never refer to it as Edward exposing himself to me again if you want me to be able to sleep at night,” I groaned.

“How can you be making jokes at a time like this,” Jasper asked. He wasn’t judging but he seemed perplexed by my reaction.

“Honestly? This doesn’t really change things for me. I’ve thought about this all night and then all day today. It doesn’t change who you guys are.”

“Um, it literally does,” Edward argued.

“No, it doesn’t! You guys didn’t just suddenly turn into vampires. You’ve been vampires this whole time. Knowing that doesn’t change who you guys are. It leaves me with a hell of a lot of questions about you and about stuff that’s gone down around me but I know each and every one of you and knowing that you guys live off animal blood, gross by the way, doesn’t change the fact that I love you guys.” They sat silently before Alice launched herself into my arms, squeezing me in a hug.

“I knew you were special,” she hummed in my ear and I patted her back awkwardly.

“I still have lots of questions,” I reminded her and she stepped back to her seat. Jasper placed a hand to her shoulder.

“Ask us anything.”

“What happens to you in the sun? How old are all of you really? Why do you go to high school? How long do vampires live for? Why don’t you eat humans? Why was Carlisle so afraid of me finding out? Is there anything else you can do besides the speed and strength thing? How often do you have to drink blood to stay alive? What are the things you’ve lied to me about to stop me from finding out?”

“Okay, let’s start with some Vampire Basics,” Emmett interjected. “Our skin does weird sh*t in the sun and we can’t hide it. Vampires live forever unless someone burns them to ash. We can go weeks without hunting but the longer we go, the weaker we become and the more temptation humans provide.”

“A lot of your questions come back to Carlisle,” said Edward. “Carlisle is the reason that we go to school. Unlike a traditional coven, we consider ourselves a family and we stay together because we love each other and want to embrace our humanity like Carlisle has. Most coven dynamics revolve around power and blood.” I gagged and Jasper laughed. “Those are the two driving forces for normal vampires. But Carlisle didn’t want to be the kind of monster that preyed on innocents.”

“Besides the normal stuff that comes with being a vampire, some of our kind have special gifts,” Jasper said. “Sometimes it’s a gift or prowess that they bring from their human life. Sometimes they change and when they wake up, they have extra abilities.”

“Do any of you guys have extra abilities?”

“We think that Emmett’s strength is his gift. Rosalie’s is her beauty. I’m an empath; I can read and influence the emotions of the people around me.”

“Wait so you… you’ve been able to tell what I can feel this whole time,” I asked in a strangled voice.

“Technically, yes.” I cringed, remembering how much I’d pined after his father and the crippling grief that had gripped me when I’d first arrived in Forks.

“Have you ever changed my feelings?” He grimaced.

“Not really. I try not to interfere but sometimes I make people feel more at ease or calmer if it feels like they’re freaking out.” I processed his words quietly while they watched me.

“Okay, I’m definitely going to have to think about that one. What about you guys,” I asked Alice and Edward.

“I have visions,” Alice offered excitedly. “I can see the future.”

“The… the future,” I repeated breathily and she grinned and nodded.

“I can’t see everything and I have no control over what I see. But I usually keep an eye on the family and potential threats to us.”

“So, have you… have you seen my future?”

“It’s not like that. There isn’t just one future, unless you’ve made a decision about something. I see possible outcomes.”

“I’m sure you’ve heard at least one of us talking about betting against Alice,” said Rosalie. “It’s because she usually knows what’s going to happen and it would be stupid to argue with her.”

“So what do the visions of my future show?” Alice grinned like a maniac.

“That you’ll be a part of this family forever and we’ll love you for all of that and more.”

“I… okay. Thank you.” I blushed as they laughed at my dumbstruck acceptance of Alice’s wild premonitions. “Edward?”

“I can hear people’s thoughts?” The blood drained from my face as I blinked at him.

“Well, not everyone,” Emmett taunted and Edward flipped him the bird.

“He can’t read yours,” Rose reassured me.

“You can’t read mine,” I asked dumbfounded. “Why not?” Edward turned his annoyed face toward me.

“I don’t know. It’s the first time it’s ever happened. It could be that you are just used to having mental blocks. It could be a strong latent gift that presents as a mortal. All I know is that when I try to hear your thoughts, it’s total silence.”

“Basically, you’re empty headed,” Emmett teased and I smiled at him.

“Careful there, Emmy. I’ve been looking for kindling to keep my toes warm at night.” He guffawed and I turned back to Edward.

“So you’ve never had a problem hearing someone before?” He frowned.

“No. But now that I really think about it, Charlie’s thoughts aren’t the same as everyone else’s.”

“How so,” Jasper asked.

“Well, normally when I hear someone, it’s the same as if they were speaking. Sometimes there’s imagery. I’d never really noticed Charlie until we started spending more time around him. But with Charlie it’s a few strong ideas and sort of… a flavor of what he’s thinking.”

“Like when I feel emotions?”

“Very much so. I can get the general idea but I don’t necessarily get the whole thought.”

“So my brain is broken and it’s genetic?” Edward smirks at me.

“I mean, I always suspected that there was something wrong with you,” he teased. His words brought up a darker memory.

“When we first met, you were trying to attack me. Why?” He sobered instantly, looking at the ground while his face twisted in shame.

“Your blood,” he admitted.

“What about it?”

“In our world, it goes like this. Werewolves smell like crap. Animals smell marginally better but still mostly unappetizing. Humans smell the most alluring. Very rarely, there are exceptions that smell so delicious that it’s almost like being confronted with the finest delicacy,” Alice explained quietly. “The reigning coven in Italy calls them ‘singers’ because it’s like a siren call to the vampire.” I stared at her before watching the rest of their grim faces, settling on Edward last.

“So, my blood is like chocolate cake,” I asked him, aiming for levity. He huffed out a humorless laugh.

“Imagine the most amazing thing you’ve ever eaten and then pretend that you’ve been starved for weeks.”

Oh.

Oh.

“So you really did want to kill me that first day,” I said finally. His face twisted.

“I’m sorry, Bella. I lost all sense of humanity as soon as I smelled you. If Jasper and Emmett hadn’t stopped me…”

“You don’t need to apologize, Edward. Knowing that you’ve been sitting next to me without hurting me says that you’re more than your instincts.”

“If it hadn’t been for Alice’s visions, I don’t think I could have handled coming back.”

“Has anyone else ever found a singer?”

“Emmett and Jasper,” Rose said quietly and the utter despair on their faces told me everything I needed to know about how those encounters ended.

“Okay, so keep my blood to myself,” I said brightly after a moment.

“Only you could make jokes at a time like this,” Edward muttered with a shake of his head. I grinned at him.

“Look, I won’t pretend that all of this isn’t just crazy to me but it really doesn’t change anything. Tell me what else I need to know about vampires. You guys obviously don’t sleep during the day and I’ve been in Carlisle’s bed so I know that you aren’t chilling in coffins.”

“We don’t sleep at all,” supplied Jasper helpfully.

“Not at all?”

“Not a wink. We don’t need to sleep. Our bodies don’t need rest to re-energize. Our minds never stop and can handle a multitude of tasks and thoughts at a time without being overwhelmed.”

“So when I slept in Carlisle’s bed that night… he wasn’t asleep on the couch,” I asked as I flushed. Edward grinned at me and shook his head slowly, looking like the cat who got the cream. “Well that’s hugely embarrassing. What do you guys do all night then? Doesn’t it get boring?”

“Sex, mostly,” Rosalie said bluntly.

“We all have our hobbies and interests,” Jasper said pointedly at her. “Sometimes we hunt. Carlisle enjoys reading and catching up on medical journals. Edward composes on the piano. But we do use that time to be close to our significant others.” My mind caught on the last part of his sentence and I whipped around to face Edward.

“Who the hell is your significant other,” I demanded. He smirks at me.

“Can’t you guess?”

“Do you even have an older girlfriend? Or was that a lie to help sell the story and get Carlisle and I together because Alice saw a vision of it?”

“I don’t have a girlfriend,” he said gleefully. My eyes narrow at him. “I have a wife.” I stopped short, staring at him as my brain tried to wrap itself around that statement. “She’s a remarkable woman. But I don’t need to tell you that since you already like her.” I frowned at him, trying to follow.

“Esme? You’re married to Esme?”

“I think it’s pretty hypocritical of you to judge me for being married to an older woman who, by the way, was only born six years before I was when you’re cozying up to the oldest vampire in this whole family,” Edward chastised me lightly. I frowned at him.

Just how old were these damn vampires?

“You better start explaining this whole age thing to me right now because Edward Cullen, you don’t look a day over seventeen.”

“Carlisle is the oldest,” said Rosalie. I opened my mouth to ask just how old he was but she seemed to sense that question was coming. “I won’t tell you how old because it’s only fair that he gets to tell you his story. He was bitten and changed somewhere in his mid-twenties. Whatever age you’re changed at, you freeze at that age. Growth, mental development, everything stops when you become one of us. Jasper is the second oldest but he and Alice joined our family last and neither of them were changed by Carlisle.” I turned to Jasper.

“And just when was Jasper born,” I asked him cheekily. He flashed a grin at me and stood up, sweeping into a bow that was far too natural.

“Major Jasper Whitlock, born 1844 and changed during the Civil War in 1863.” Silence.

“I’m sorry, do you want to run that by me again,” I wheezed out. He laughed and began to tell me the incredible tale of growing up near Galveston, Texas and lying about his age to enlist in the Confederate Army. As he recounts the bloody memories of a newborn army -which let’s just take a second to say holy sh*t -I find myself terrified for my friend, even knowing that his story eventually leads to Alice and happiness.

“...and when she slipped her hand in mine, like we were the oldest friends in the world, I felt something I hadn’t felt since I was human: hope,” he finished, gazing at Alice adoringly where she had perched in his lap during the course of his story.

“We were,” she assured him. “You just didn’t know it yet.” They pressed their lips together and Emmett fake gagged across the room.

“Get a room, you two.”

“So Carlisle, then Jasper. Who’s next?”

“Technically, Esme was born six years before me in 1895 in Ohio. Carlisle met her when she was a young girl, when he treated her for an injury. I was born in 1901 in Chicago. Rosalie was born in 1915 in New York and Emmett was born the same year. Carlisle moved to Chicago to practice medicine in 1917 and in 1918 when I was seventeen, my parents and I caught the Spanish Influenza and it took both of them. My mother begged Carlisle to save me and so he bit me and changed me. I was his first companion. We think Alice changed about two years later.” I look over at her and she shakes her head at me.

“It is a very, very long story that I promise I will share with you later after you’ve had time to process everything. It’s not… it’s not a very nice story,” she whispered and Jasper pulled her closer to him, brushing his lips over her temple and mumbling sweet words under his breath to her.

“We were in Wisconsin in 1921, when Esme was brought into the hospital morgue. They thought she was dead but Carlisle could hear her heart beating and remembered her from when she was a child. He changed her while I was away on a hunting trip and when I came back, we realized we were mates.”

“Mates?”

“A bit animalistic but yes. Sometimes, vampires choose mates for themselves and other times, we meet someone and we just know that they are the other half ourselves. Regardless of how it happens, it’s a bond so strong that oftentimes when one person dies, the other goes crazy or follows them.”

“That’s beautiful and heartbreaking.”

“Esme is my mate. We knew from the moment we laid eyes on each other. The same way Rose knew when she saw Emmett and Alice and Jasper met.” I desperately wanted to ask if it was the same for Carlisle and me but I couldn’t bring myself to. I’d have to ask Carlisle when I finally spoke to him.

“So Esme was next to be changed but she was 26 so even though you’re close in age, she looks older because she was human longer?”

“Exactly. Rosalie was changed in 1933 and only two years later she found Emmett in the woods and brought him to Carlisle to change because she knew what he was to her. We lived in Hoquiam a year later which is when we met the Quileutes and formed the treaty. Alice and Jasper found us in 1950. And we’ve lived in different places since then, for as long as we can get away with not aging without raising suspicion. We switch up the family dynamics as well. Sometimes Rosalie and Emmett live on their own. Sometimes Esme and Carlisle pretend to be married because it’s an easier story to sell.”

“Edward hates it when they pretend to be married. He gets huffy and jealous,” drawled Rosalie and I laughed as Edward sulked.

“Yeah, well, next time we do that, Bella will be jealous along with me,” he justified. My eyebrows hit my hairline.

“Come again?”

“Edward and Esme can rarely be together publicly because of the perceived difference in their ages. It will be the same for you and Carlisle if you don’t wait until you’re in your twenties to be changed,” explained Alice.

“Um, is that… a sure thing?” Edward and Alice shared a look.

“I mean, the choice is yours but we sort of assumed that you would… well, that you’d want to change and be with Carlisle,” Edward said tentatively.

Change.

Into a vampire.

I’d be with Carlisle for eternity but I’d also have to leave Charlie behind.

But if I didn’t, then I’d lose Carlisle and it had become very apparent to me after this conversation with them that Carlisle and I were endgame.

If I didn’t join him in this life, how long would he stay with his family before following me into the afterlife, leaving them behind to mourn us?

What kind of relationship would we have when I was old enough to pass for his mother? His grandmother?

Maybe knowing their secret did actually change things.

Chapter 28: Run Away to Mars

Chapter Text

Okay I legit did not mean to leave ya'll hanging for so long. I promise to infinity and beyond that I am not leaving this unfinished. I just have time blindness. And a knack for letting real life kick my trash.

The song for this chapter is Run Away to Mars by Talk.

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Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Twenty-Eight: Run Away to Mars
EPOV

Bella knowing our secret was a weight lifted off my shoulders and I felt like I could finally take a full breath.

Her curiosity was insatiable after we’d crossed the awkwardness of talking about her potential change. She asked question after question, trying to gain a complete understanding of not only our kind, but each of our experiences. As Rosalie recounted the story of her life and brutal death in gruesome detail, Bella listened in an empathetic horror, her hand in Rosalie’s, offering her comfort when she became overwhelmed by some of the details. She held her, loving her the way that Esme often did when Rosalie became overwhelmed by the closure she hadn’t really gotten.

Bella was a strange mix of friend and motherly love that should have seemed awkward and unnatural but all I could think as I watched their interaction was how right she was for us.

Not just Carlisle and his broken, lonely soul.

But our whole family.

Esme’s role within our little circle was that of an older sister. Even she and Carlisle shared a close relationship that resounded strongly as brother and sister, despite his being our proverbial father. She offered advice and comfort in equal measure with teasing and joking.

Bella easily danced between sassy, sh*t giving friend and that elusive maternal role that promised unconditional love and support.

It killed me to think that Carlisle was so ready to give this up, to deny her, thus denying not only himself but the rest of us as well from the warmth and acceptance that was wholly Bella .

She was the piece of the puzzle that we’d been living without in a package that none of us had expected.

Carlisle is in for so much sh*t when he finds out she knows , Jasper thought as he watched Bella turn red with, what was I gleaned from his thoughts, righteous anger on Rosalie’s behalf.

“She’s going to eat him up and spit him back out,” I said quietly next to him.

“And he’ll love every minute of it,” Emmett added gleefully and I chuckled. Bella turned her eyes to us curiously but I just shook my head at her. She narrowed her eyes at me before turning back to Rosalie.

“Personally, I think she should make him sweat for a bit,” Emmett said. “Make some jokes that have him wondering if she’s figured it out. Pull some stunts that will turn his hair gray.”

“His hair can’t turn gray. He’s a vampire, you moron,” Jasper argued, punching his arm.

“Not literally but mentally, she could make even Carlisle lose years off his life.” I snickered.

“I would pay good money to see her mess with him. He’s been too cavalier about her,” I complained.

“Betcha Bella would accept those terms,” Jasper drawled with a wicked smile.

“If you boys don’t stop muttering to yourselves over there, I will come over and beat your asses myself,” Bella said from her seat, squished onto the recliner with Rose who had finished her story. Emmett held out his arms and she stood and curled herself into his lap, his tree trunk arms wrapped securely around her. Alice slid into Rose’s vacated spot. I watched the visions coming at her half-heartedly, none of them important enough to give my full attention to.

“Edward was offering to pay you to mess with Carlisle before he knows that you’ve discovered our dirty secret,” Jasper teased.

“You want me to screw with his head,” Bella asked, her nose scrunched in distaste. I laughed at her reticence to give Carlisle the same treatment we got on a daily basis.

“Emmett suggested that it could be fun and a mellow payback for Carlisle keeping it from you so that you had no choice but to find out from someone else.”

Yeah, the smelly wolves that insisted on a treaty that they’d unknowingly broken.

Though perhaps it didn’t extend to members of the tribe who couldn’t shift. I didn’t think the terms had been that exact. It didn’t soothe my ire at all to know that if we did anything that went against the agreed upon stipulations, they wouldn’t hesitate to tear us limb from limb.

Well, if they still had wolves. As far as I knew, there hadn’t been a shifted wolf in decades. Definitely not since we came back.

“What kind of ‘messing’ would I be doing exactly,” she asked, interest flashing in her brown eyes. I bit back a smile. Always so coy.

“Nothing too extreme. Maybe just some thinly veiled comments and questions, like the ones you asked us earlier.”

“I think it’d be hilarious if you convinced him to eat food for you,” Emmett suggested. We all shuddered.

“I don’t know if that counts. Carlisle would eat glass for her,” Jasper argued.

“It’s not a bad idea. Especially if she got him to eat something particularly vile.”

“Would that… hurt him?”

“No, it’s just disgusting and uncomfortable. We can’t digest anything but blood, so anything we eat, we have to… force back up,” I said in blatant disgust.

“So vampires are a bunch of bulimics,” she said flatly and we all laughed. Only Bella would describe it as such.

“How do you think we manage to stay so beautiful,” Emmett asked, preening.

“I assumed some sort of virgin or goat sacrifice and black magic was involved in your case, Em,” she replied sweetly. He narrowed his eyes at her playfully.

“Goats are revolting but a nice grizzly bear would do nicely.” Her nose wrinkled again.

“I don’t think I can talk about what you guys eat. Apparently my aversion to blood is not limited to the human kind.”

“Fine. No more bodily fluid talk. What do you say, Swan? Want to give Carlisle a little taste of the medicine you give us all the time,” Jasper tempted. She sat back in her seat, considering it, her thoughts written all over her face even as her mental voice gave me nothing but the familiar comforting and equally frustrating silence it usually did.

“Okay fine. But everything has to be run by me and I won’t do anything that will potentially damage my relationship with him, his relationship with any of you -except Edward, of course -or our relationship with each other.”

“Deal,” Emmett proclaimed, giving her a wolfish grin and showing off his teeth. “And on that note, I’m going to take my Rosie home. Today was hard for her. I’m thinking a hot bubble bath and back rub is in order.” He gazed into Rosalie’s face and she smiled softly at him, her eyes and thoughts still dark with her re-lived trauma.

“Wow, Emmett, that makes it so much harder to hate you,” Bella said simply. He rolled his eyes.

“You love me, Snack Pack.” He stood, carrying Rosalie in his arms but reached down to ruffle her hair as he passed on his way to the door. I listened to him carry Rose to his Jeep and tear away from the house and take off for home.

“This has been a day… week… year,” Bella huffed out on a huge sigh.

“Do you feel better knowing,” Alice asked, climbing off the recliner she’d been squished against Bella on and climbing between Jasper and I on the couch, cuddling close to him. Visions assaulted me through her thoughts but I tuned them out.

“Yes and no. I’m still wrapping my head around it. But I also get why Carlisle never told me. I mean, if he’d tried, I’d have assumed that I finally found a flaw of his outside his awful communication skills. I’d have thought he was crazy. Like committed to a sanatorium and eating his own hair crazy.”

“The man was changed into a vampire and refused to eat people so he made a life eating animals instead,” I said flatly. “He’s crazy.” She chuckled, rubbing her finger across the worn fabric of the recliner arm.

“Is it… is it because I’m human? Is that the reason why he’s so hesitant to… I don’t know… progress? Jump in with me?”

“I wish I could say it had nothing to do with it,” I muttered. Her face fell.

“He’s not opposed to your mortality, Bella,” Jasper quickly reassured her. “He just feels like a relationship with him would be cheating you out of life experiences and also putting you in danger.”

“Because I’m such a naive child,” she retorted cynically.

“To be fair, we’re all children to Carlisle,” Alice replied. “He’s so much older than any of us. And with the exception of Esme, he’s developmentally older than the rest of us by at least a few years.”

“I must seem like an infant to him,” Bella whined, burying her face in her hands.

“Definitely not,” Jasper and I said together, smiling at our like mindedness.

“He just has a warped sense of life and death. But if anyone can take Carlisle’s preconceived notions and turn his world on its head, it’s you, Isabella Swan,” Alice assured her. Bella peeked an eye out to look at us before nodding.

“I guess Carlisle isn’t the only one who’s going to have to work on their communication skills,” she muttered. I opened my mouth to reply but the sound of Charlie’s police cruiser tearing down the street and into the driveway stopped me short. I focused on his thoughts but they were quick to appear and disappear.

He opened the front door and flew into the room, calling Bella’s name. As soon as he came in and saw us in there and her in the recliner, he fell next to her seat and wrapped her in his arms.

“Dad, what’s wrong?” I still failed to read his thoughts as anything more than gists of feelings and ideas. I looked over at Alice and Jasper. He was clenching her hand and his pant leg tightly while she had assumed a far off look in her eyes, already focusing on the future. Her visions swam around my head, most of them broken and nonsensical but a snippet continued to float in and out of the others, details changing but always the same spotlight.

Bella, dead, covered in blood and staring at us from the ground with glazed, lifeless eyes.

Rage and fear filled me, coursing through my body like dual forces of fire and ice.

“It’s okay. Everything’s fine. Just a long day at work,” Charlie said gruffly but I could feel the terror and desperation in his thoughts. His thoughts seemed both protective but lost. A hard undertone ran underneath all of his thoughts that I could read if I focused all of my efforts into understanding it.

It isn’t safe here. I have to keep her safe. I need to send her away from me. Where can she go?

I thought out a concise plan for this conversation and Alice picked up on it immediately, trading alternative words and phrases out to find the best outcome.

“Seriously,” she exclaimed loudly, pulling her phone from her pocket and fiddling with the screen like she was reacting to a notification. Bella and Charlie looked over at us.

“Is it the security cameras again,” I asked, loud enough to be sure Charlie heard me.

“Yes. I swear a leaf falls and the sensors get tripped. It’s great for security and peace of mind if it was ever a real threat. They’re just so sensitive,” she said in exasperation.

“What is happening,” Bella asked in confusion, suspicion edging the words as she looked between Alice and myself.

“Carlisle had this state of the art security system put in around the property and the motion detector sensors send alerts and live video feeds to our phones.”

“I didn’t know Carlisle was worried about security all the way out there,” Charlie said quietly and I could already sense a hint of a plan forming in his head, the way Alice and I had been pushing for.

“He wasn’t but we’ve had some kids coming out to try and vandalize the property on dares and stuff. So he thought it was better safe than sorry.”

“Why didn’t he mention anything? I would have had patrols focusing out there more.”

“He didn’t want to bug you. It hasn’t been anything that bad and mostly we’ve caught and talked to the perpetrators. But he was worried that if it escalated, he’d need to identify the culprits. And honestly, Esme was watching some true crime documentaries and didn’t feel comfortable living so far from town without some precautions in place,” I assured him. The plan that had been forming in his thoughts was starting to become clearer and the corner of Alice’s mouth twitched as new visions of Bella and our family began to fly at her.

Bella was staring at us like we’d grown extra heads or eyeballs. She knew now that we didn’t have a security problem and that there was nothing we couldn’t take care of ourselves. I shook my head ever so slightly at her as she opened her mouth to question our story. She looked between us and then followed my gaze as I slowly and deliberately moved it to Charlie. As she took in every tense line of his body, understanding began to dawn on her.

“It’s true,” she finally said and Charlie looked back at her. “I watched a documentary with Esme about a girl who lived in the middle of nowhere in Texas and someone broke into their house at night and murdered everyone except her because he only injured her and she just had to lay there and pretend to be dead for hours. Turns out that he didn’t even know them. He was passing through after starting a killing spree on his way to the border. It really freaked her out. I told her nothing like that would ever happen in Forks but she said that girl probably thought the same thing until it did. I guess we don’t live in a world where that kind of thing is totally impossible anymore.”

I wanted to applaud the masterful way she delivered the story. She didn’t ask him what had him so on edge but she clearly was brushing against those fears as he ideas resolved into a concrete plan that Alice watched in her head, and I in her thoughts.

“Maybe you and Esme should find something a little lighter to watch next time, Bells,” Charlie said with a forced smile. “Anyway, I just wanted to make sure you got home okay. I still have a few things to take care of. Don’t worry about me for dinner; you can just make whatever or order a pizza or something.” He got up and headed back out the door, climbing into his cruiser and heading deeper into town.

Towards the hospital.

“Now are you two freakshows going to tell me what the hell is going on,” Bella demanded.

Chapter 29: Carry On Wayward Son

Chapter Text

Uh oh! Ready to find out what Charlie is going to do? What do those devilish kids have planned?

The song for this chapter is Carry On Wayward Son by NEONI. Shout out to my Supernatural homies.

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Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Twenty-Nine: Carry On Wayward Son
CPOV

Carlisle. It’s Charlie. I have a delicate matter I need to discuss with you. Can you meet me at the diner?

It wasn’t often that I felt fear but when I saw Charlie’s text come in, I immediately wondered if he had figured out my feelings for his daughter was preparing to threaten or shoot me. I finished the last of my notes, packing away the others into my briefcase to do overnight. I really couldn’t concentrate, even with my heightened abilities while Charlie’s message sat heavily in my thoughts. Once I’d gathered my things, I locked my office behind me and headed to my car, murmuring pleasant goodbyes to coworkers as I passed them, a knot forming in my stomach. Once I was seated behind the wheel of my car, I took off with more speed than was strictly safe and pulled into the parking lot at the diner in record time. I walked slowly to the door, rolling my sleeves up as I went and loosening my tie. Charlie was seated in the back corner, right by the kitchens where there weren’t any windows, his back to me so that I could only see the top of his brown curly hair. I made my way over to him, ignoring the smell of greasy food and old coffee hanging in the air mixed with the scent of humans.

“Charlie,” I said, stopping next to the booth. He looked up at me and I didn’t miss the flash of relief in eyes as I deeply inhaled the acrid smell of fear rolling off him.

“Carlisle, good to see you. Please sit.” I took a seat in the booth across from him and watched as he fiddled with a coffee mug. I wondered how much caffeine was coursing through his system: he was fidgeting and nervous.

“I have to say, I was a bit surprised by your message. Is everything okay,” I asked lightly, watching him carefully for any sign that he was about to call me a cradle-robbing pervert and then shoot me.

Oh god, I was starting to think in melodramatics like Edward.

“I know it was sudden. But this is a… time sensitive matter, Carlisle. And I think you’re the only person who might be able to help.” His eyes were darting around as he spoke, like he expected someone to jump out at him at any moment.

“I’ll do anything I can,” I offered calmly. He nodded absentmindedly.

“I can’t tell you many of the details and I’m sorry for that. But I’ve been working on a case. It’s a multi-county case and the state police are offering their assistance but it’s been a tough nut to crack. Without revealing information relating to the ongoing investigation, I have reason to believe that the perpetrator is targeting Bella. Or has plans to, at least.”

Glacial iciness covered me from head to toe.

“What,” I asked lowly, nearly growling. He didn’t notice my tense posture, focusing on the table in front of him.

“I received some pictures of her that were clearly taken from a distance, without her knowledge. Along with pictures there was a message that made his intentions quite clear.”

“What do you need from me,” I asked, forcing the words out in something that resembled human speech and not the animalistic roar I felt in my chest.

“I don’t have any family left. No parents or siblings. It’s the same on Renee’s side of the family too. We were both only children. I don’t have anyone that I can send her to stay with for safe keeping. To be honest, I was prepared to call in every favor with some of the forces in other states. But then Alice and Edward were telling about that new security system that you had installed after the vandalism attempts and Esme’s concerns.” I kept my face blank in the face of this completely new lie my children had told. “I don’t want to burden you and god knows your family has practically adopted Bella into the fold already. But if she could stay with you, she would be so much safer than being alone at our house for hours and hours on end.”

He wanted Bella to come live with us? Would this make it that much worse when he found out about Bella and I?

Bella is in danger.

That single thought ricocheted around my head, stirring me to action and filling me with nothing but the deepest desire to hunt down whoever was posing the threat and disposing of them in the cruelest way possible.

“What about school,” I heard myself asking him as I tried to fully process the bombshell that had just been dropped in my lap.

“I’d like to say that she’s safe at school but I can’t make those kinds of promises. She might need to stay home until I finish this. Out of sight, out of mind is what I’m going for here.”

“I could write a doctor’s note for the school. If Bella caught a serious case of mono, she’d need to complete her studies away from campus,” I suggested and relief split across his face like a shaft of light.

“That would be wonderful. I’m so sorry to ask you for something so big, Carlisle,” Charlie started but I held up a hand.

“It’s not a big ask. We love Bella and we would be devastated if anything happened to her. Having her stay isn’t even a hardship,” I assured him with a smile. He rubbed his hand over his face tiredly.

“Thank you. I will try and keep you updated but I’d be lying if I said that whoever he is, he’s taken an interest in me specifically and her by association. I’m not sure how often I’ll be able to see her without endangering her. But rest assured that I am doing anything and everything I can to catch the son of a bitch.”

“I know you want her to be safe, Charlie. No one could doubt that. Is there anything at all I can do to help you?” He smiled thinly.

“No. I am using every resource available to catch and stop this guy. It’s just a matter of time before we arrest him. In the meantime, I can rest knowing that she’s safe at your house.” A twinge of guilt twisted my gut. She would be safe with us but thinking about living with Bella made me acutely aware that I was sitting across from her father and he had a gun.

“I promise we will keep her safe,” I vowed and he took a deep breath and nodded.

“I’m going to tell her that there’s damage to the house and insurance is having it fixed so she’ll be staying with you.” I frowned.

“You’re going to lie to her?” He frowned back.

“I can’t tell her that some psychopath is threatening to hurt her. We can come up with a reason for her to miss school but the less people that know about this the better. If you can talk to your kids and just let them know not to let her be alone, that would help. But I can’t have her living in fear that someone is going to come after her.”

“You don’t think that information would make her more vigilant?”

“I know that she lost her mother less than a year ago. I know that her time in this town hasn’t been the easiest. I know that Bella is wonderful but she is so selfless at times that she would cut her own hand off just to give it to someone she loved who needed it more. And I don’t need her worrying about if I’m coming back home or if she’s going to end up orphaned, either. It’s just better if she doesn’t know about all of the details.” We sat in silence before he heaved a sigh. “I hate lying to her. I hate all of this. But I can’t bring myself to steal her piece of mind. Knowing her, she’d just try to start her own investigation and the last thing I need is Bella taking an interest in the bastard taking an interest in her.”

“What do you know about this guy,” I asked with barely contained rage.

“I can’t give details of an ongoing investigation. We don’t have specifics, anyway. But this guy has killed before and won’t hesitate to do it again. I’m sorry to put you in this position. I’m hoping that your security measures will stop him from targeting you as well. Honestly, I’m hoping that if she just disappears, he’ll lose interest completely and then I can focus solely on catching him. Since that threat, all I can think about is that she’s in danger and I don’t know who he is.”

“It’s a small town. Surely a stranger would stand out.”

“Yes and no. We get enough people stopping as they pass through that we can’t possibly track all of them. And this guy knows how to sneak around without being noticed. He’s already done it.” Comprehension dawned on me.

“The logging accident,” I prompted and he didn’t say anything but his eyes tightened. “Charlie, you need to be careful. Whoever did that knew how to cause massive damage with very little effort. I don’t want you to show up at the hospital with an injury that’s even worse.”

“I know,” he groaned, resting his head on the table. “It could be worse. I know that. Whoever he is, he’s intelligent and knows what he’s doing. But I already have several agencies assisting with identifying and catching him, so I’m hopeful that if I remove Bella from the picture, he’ll be easier to catch. Or that they’ll come through and we’ll be able to identify the guy and then he won’t be able to hide.”

“I will do whatever I can to help you,” I promised.

“Thank you. Just keep my baby girl safe. I trust that you will protect her, Carlisle. She’s safe with you.” My throat tightened at the words. I knew he meant in this instant and that he was talking about my family as well as me. But the affirmations warmed me, feeling far too much like the approval I wished I could get from him but would never ask for.

“I will protect her with every ability I have and more,” I assured him and he nodded, moving to stand up.

“I’ll tell her when I get home and have her pack up tonight. Is that enough time for Esme to make arrangements for her?”

“We can be ready tonight,” I told him. “I can send the boys to come pick her up and bring her home.”

“Thank you,” he said, voice choked and I saw the brightness of his eyes that betrayed how much it killed him to send her away.

“She’ll be back in no time,” I said quietly and he nodded, clearing his throat before heading out of the diner. I waited for a moment, to give him time to get in his cruiser and leave before I stood up and followed, already pulling my phone from my pocket to call Esme and then Alice.

All the while, I kept my head on swivel, looking for the shadowy figure that would meet an unpleasant demise if he even breathed on Bella.

Chapter 30: Falling in Love

Chapter Text

Okay so I suck. But here's a fun fact you didn't know about this story: I know what happens in every single chapter (or what's supposed to anyway) and I am so excited for upcoming chapters but I wasn't actually sure if this one would be happier or more melancholy. But stick with me, folks, because things are coming that you will NOT want to miss.

The song for this chapter is Falling in Love by Cody Fry. I might be mildly in love with his music.

HEY READERS! Want to be able to play all the songs from this story in order while you read? Well now you can! Just visit: https colon slash slash music(dot)amazon(dot)com slash user-playlists slash 83eaf70f5fd2488da12e8f0787411603sune?ref=dm_sh_670a-24ac-70cc-3d48-5036e (Remember to replace the words with the punctuation and no spaces!)

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Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

Chapter Thirty: Falling in Love
BPOV

“I thought you were just staying for a while, not moving in,” Emmett groused dramatically as he carried another box in from my truck. I watched him pretend to buckle under the weight with exaggerated struggle and snorted.

“Take it up with Alice. She’s the one who told me to box up my stuff since this is an indefinite visit.”

And she would know.

Still getting used to the whole my-best-friend-sees-the-future thing.

“How much stuff do you really have though? Really, how much stuff can you have accumulated if you’ve only been on the planet for less than two decades.”

“Ew, Emmett, don’t say it like that,” Jasper complained as he carried another box in the door. Now that I knew that they could have each carried at least three times that without breaking a sweat, I wondered if this frustration with having to act human wore on them after so long trying to integrate into society. I could only imagine how boring it must be to make so many unnecessary trips just because we had decided not to let Carlisle in on the fact that I knew they were members of the undead.

We wouldn’t want to pass up the opportunity to prank him after all.

Especially when I seemed to refrain from doing that to him, according to Edward.

“Like what, honestly? Bella’s not twenty yet so she’s under two decades,” Emmett argued.

“So are you,” I said with a saccharine smile. He grinned and winked at me.

Carlisle was upstairs in his room, which he had generously offered to me since the guest bedroom didn’t have an attached bath and he worried I needed more privacy than that.

At least that’s what he had claimed.

Edward had kindly informed me that Carlisle couldn’t stand the idea of me being anywhere but in his bed, stinking the place up.

It seemed more romantic if you were a vampire.

But Edward had also reminded me on the drive over that vampires had superhuman hearing that even if I was downstairs or outside and Carlisle was upstairs, he’d be able to hear me. We’d plotted a bit about what I could to trick Carlisle and take advantage of my recently acquired knowledge of their kind. I hesitated against anything that could lead to actual physical harm. And I refused to do anything that would be blatantly dishonest or affect the integrity of our relationship. But Edward pointed out that word play was probably the cleverest way to drive my boyfriend nuts while feigning innocence.

I always was a sucker for a good pun.

“Bella, why don’t you head upstairs and start unpacking,” Esme suggested as she carried a tote of dirty clothes towards the laundry room.

“Esme, really, you don’t have to do my laundry. I’ll take care of it as soon as everything is out of the rain,” I insisted but she just smiled serenely.

“I don’t mind. There’s so much to do and this was all so sudden for you. Besides, I like laundry. There’s something freeing for the mind in the monotony of clothes.” I stared at her before smirking.

“I don’t know about that. It’s an eternal chore. You shouldn’t have to spend an eternity washing clothes. That just seems cruel.” She bit back a laugh and headed into the laundry room.

“What else is one supposed to fill an eternity with,” she called after herself and I laughed. My phone vibrated and I pulled it out of my hoodie pocket.

Edward: That one was perfect. He got a chuckle out of the joke but is also now worrying that laundry is enough to deter you from even thinking positively about the prospect of an eternal life.

Me: If I have to do laundry for eternity, then he’s not wrong.

Edward: It’s not even that bad.

Me: That’s because Esme does your laundry for you! When was the last time you washed a sock, Edward Cullen?

Edward: It seems silly to waste all that water and electricity on a single sock. Are you sure you know how laundry works?

Me: I’ll run you through the wash. Maybe it’s a lesser known way to kill vampires. At the very least, you would hate it. Win-win for me.

I heard him laugh from outside where he was in the bed of my truck, handing things off to his siblings. I rolled my eyes and headed upstairs, to Carlisle’s room. The room was so large that even with Emmett's complaints about all my stuff, it barely seemed crowded. I looked around for Carlisle but didn’t see him anywhere. I walked further in, peering into the closet where I found him making space for my clothes.

“You know I really don’t mind taking the guest room,” I said, leaning against the doorframe. He smiled to himself as he rearranged hangers.

“I know that. But I’d also like you to have more privacy than the guest room affords.”

“Honestly, the guest room alone seems luxurious. I thought I would be fully embracing that vagabond lifestyle of crashing on the couch and living out of boxes. This almost feels like you’re expecting me to stay permanently.” He chuckled at me.

“Maybe I’m hoping that if you see how nicely your things look next to mine, you’ll be tempted by that someday,” he teased with a wink.

“I don’t know, Carlisle. I’m not sure your bookshelves have enough room for your books and mine. Besides, what would the neighbors think,” I asked in horror, clutching imaginary pearls.

“Considering that the nearest neighbors are five miles away, I can only imagine they’d be appalled at my forwardness. And if my bookshelves aren’t good enough, I will happily get you your own. We wouldn’t want your books to feel uncomfortable with mine.” I grinned and walked behind him, pressing my chest to his hard, sculpted back and wrapping my arms around his middle, holding tightly.

He was cold under the henley he was wearing but I didn’t mind. I never minded. I closed my eyes, cheek pressed to his back while I took a deep breath, letting it out in a slow gust. His hands moved to encase mine on his chest. He smelled like books and leather and something just innately Carlisle that made me want to simultaneously cuddle up against him and nap like a cat and climb him like a tree. It calmed my racing mind.

“Is my dad going to be okay,” I whispered. His hands tightened on mine.

While Charlie had tried to spin some tale about needing to fumigate or some such nonsense, Edward and Alice had already informed me that Charlie was concerned about one of his cases and wanted me safely tucked away somewhere safe.

It was hard, hearing my dad lie to my face but I also knew that he felt like it was the safest option. He would say that he didn’t want me to worry about him but that was ridiculous since I always worried about him. Ever since the accident with the logging equipment, I knew things weren’t business as usual in sleepy little Forks. I’d always sort of worried about my dad being a cop, having seen far too much television where bad things happen to the boys in blue -a phrase I’d never understood considering all the different colors they wore. But this was the first time I was actually concerned that my father’s job was going to lead to something more sinister.

“Your father is an excellent police chief. He has several agencies helping him with this. I have absolute faith he will take care of this and life will go back to normal for you. Even if that also makes me sad because I’m not too selfless to admit that I will enjoy having you here immensely.” He turned, keeping my arms around him until he could wrap his around me, pressing my head into his chest.

“I’m so worried about him but I’m also so happy because this means I get to see you more. Am I the worst daughter ever,” I asked with a groan and he laughed.

“Never. You can feel both things at once. I’m concerned your father had to resort to this but I am also ecstatic that I’ll come home to you every night for the foreseeable future.” I smiled into his chest, my cheeks heating at the thought.

“Hells Bells, I didn’t think anyone could have as many books as Carlisle. Have you even read all of these, Bella?” Emmett’s loud voice interrupted our moment and I reluctantly pulled away from Carlisle to walk out of the closet and start unpacking.

“As a matter of fact, Emmett, I have read all of them. I know that’s hard for you to understand because you can’t read but not all of us are cursed with such ignorance.” He scowled at me and set the box down before pulling a utility knife from his pocket.

“I can read just fine, thanks. What do you even read that you need this many books?” I heard Carlisle walk out behind me and go to open some of the clothes boxes to start putting them away. I followed him, starting to sort things based on where they belonged.

“ISABELLA MARIE SWAN,” Emmett shouted and I jumped, whirling around.

“What, you asshat?” He was reaching into the box with a sh*t-eating grin on his face.

“Please explain to me why you have so many books about vampire romance? Is this some weird kink for you?”

“What-” I stopped, watching as he lifted stack after stack of, yep, those were all vampire romances. Steamy ones too based on the lack of clothing on some of the covers. I stared at him in confusion, my face turning red.

Those weren’t my books. I didn’t own more than one vampire romance novel and that was the one my mom had bought for me when I turned fourteen amongst a plethora of other romance novels, intended to introduce me to romance and the things I was ‘old enough to care about now’. I stared hard at the box.

Wait, that wasn’t one of the boxes I’d used.

“ The Vampire Prince ? Dark Obsession ? Vampires Like It Hot ? Love Bites ? What’s your obsession, Bella? Should we be worried you’re going to go down a dark alley one night in search of a stranger?” I narrowed my gaze at him as I heard what could only be a low growl coming from Carlisle’s general vicinity. It sent shivers racing up my spine.

“Don’t genre shame me, Emmett Cullen. I’m not always in the mood to read Chaucer, you dick.” He laughed heartily. “Whatever, get out of here. I don’t want your unnaturally large hands pawing through my things.”

“You know what they say about guys with big hands,” he offered suggestively.

“That they’re overcompensating,” I deadpanned, pushing him out of the room. He turned to me as he headed down the hall with a wink and I gave him a thumbs up back. I wiped the smile off my face and walked back in the room, face and ears red. I started to unpack boxes, waiting to see if Carlisle was going to say something about Emmett’s planted box.

Obviously, he’d decided on his own pranks for me and Carlisle without any warning.

“So,” Carlisle said awkwardly after stewing in silence for several minutes, “what are your books like?”

“I… I get that a lot of people think they’re crap but I like them. My mom got me my first one when I was fourteen.”

First and only.

“And it’s something you… connected with?” I heard the nervousness in his normally impeccably smooth voice and I had to think of sad things to keep a giggle from bursting out.

“I… um… god, this is embarrassing,” I muttered. “I really liked the one she got me. It made me realize that I think… well, I think I have… a, um… biting kink,” I said so fast I’m not sure he caught it. He went completely still in that unnatural way of his. I watched him from under my lashes as I continued to unpack the box in front of me.

“That’s, um… nothing to be… embarrassed about,” he finally said, voice rough. My phone buzzed and I leaned over to look at the screen.

Edward: You can’t even imagine what his thoughts sound like right now. It’s a combination of short circuiting, arousal and guilt. I think you broke him. You didn’t even have to get naked to do it. Emmett owes me a grand.

I rolled my eyes at the message and focused back on Carlisle, who was very carefully putting my clothes on hangers and setting them aside.

“Is this… is this weird,” I asked uncertainly. “We can just pretend I never said anything. I shouldn’t have. That was too much information. Ugh, I’m such a weirdo,” I groaned, covering my eyes with my hands and leaning against the end of the bed.

Cold hands gently grasped mine and pulled them away from my face. Carlisle stared down at me, his ochre eyes burning into mine and I watched every emotion that Edward named and more flickering across them like flames.

“You aren’t weird,” he said, voice husky. “We just haven’t talked about… that part of our relationship before. It’s perfectly normal for that to feel awkward the first time.”

“Is… is that something you want to talk about? We don’t have to.” He smiled to himself.

“I know that with our age difference, it might seem like I have a lot of… experience with that kind of thing but… well, I don’t, Bella. You already know I’m a bit old fashioned and… that … is something I’ve always considered special, precious. I haven’t been interested enough in anyone before to really explore that.” He stared down at our joined hands, embarrassment obvious.

“Oh. Oh ,” I said, as I realized what he was bravely admitting to me, my unexpected prank turning into a serious conversation. Knowing that he was older than the hundred years Esme had on me painted a stark picture of what was adding up to be a very lonely life. Especially surrounded by couples who were definitely not abstaining.

Hell, I was worried that by the end of this, I’d know way more about Emmett than I ever wanted to.

I’d probably need therapy.

“I feel the same way,” I admitted and he looked up at me in surprise. “When I was younger, I wasn’t really interested in anyone that way. And then when my mom got sick, it was the last thing on my mind, especially after seeing what her ex-husband did to her when he left her. And since then… well, there’s only one guy I’ve been interested in and I haven’t felt the need to rush into things with him. See, besides the fact that he’s got some mostly decent kids and a really nice sister, he’s a gentleman who treats me like I’m precious. And despite the fact that he’s a gorgeous, hot-as-sin doctor, it’s his heart that’s consumed my thoughts.” His eyes softened as I spoke until he leaned in and pressed a firm, affectionate kiss to my mouth. I relished in the feeling of his lips moving against mine and sighed.

“I’ve been pretty consumed by your heart, too,” he whispered against my lips.

“I guess we both must have known deep, deep down that the other was out there somewhere, coming for us.”

“Maybe. But I don’t think anything could have prepared me for you, Bella,” he said, rubbing his thumb over my bottom lip. “You are better than anything I ever could have imagined for myself.” I flushed.

“You’re not so bad yourself, Doctor Cullen.” He grinned.

“I believe your exact words were ‘gorgeous’ and ‘hot-as-sin’.”

“Yeah, well don’t go getting a big head. Then you’d be flawed and god forbid that ever happen.”

Chapter 31: Iris

Chapter Text

So here's my plan: I'm going to publish the next few chapters as I finish them (which is hopefully sooner and closer together than they have lately) but as a write five or six chapters ahead, I'm going to wait to post those until I have a certain number finished in advance. Now, ideally, that won't require much waiting because I'll be writing regularly. But I also don't want to criminally cliffie you guys. And guys, I wrote out an index for the rest of the chapters and we still have like TWENTY to go before we done. So strap in, kids. It's about to get exciting.

The song for this chapter is Iris by Tommee Profitt. Remember that you can play along with the story on Amazon Music using the special web address below!

HEY READERS! Want to be able to play all the songs from this story in order while you read? Well now you can! Just visit: https colon slash slash .com slash user-playlists slash 83eaf70f5fd2488da12e8f0787411603sune?ref=dm_sh_670a-24ac-70cc-3d48-5036e (Remember to replace the words with the punctuation and no spaces!)

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Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE: Iris

CPOV

Something was up with Bella.

I wasn’t a particularly paranoid or suspicious man. I wasn’t prone to see plots where there were none. I didn’t assume that hushed whispers around the room were about me.

Granted, I could hear those whispers so I knew if they were but that’s beside the point.

But it had been three weeks since Bella moved in with us and something was definitely up with her.

I hadn’t thought much of it at first, the casual jokes or comments she made with the kids that were funnier because they were unintentionally nailing what we were on the head. She’d made that joke about doing laundry for eternity. We’d had that conversation prompted by her admitting to a biting fetish.

I still couldn’t recall that moment without my brain metaphorically slamming on the brakes and freezing me in the moment.

But as the days passed, I started to become increasingly aware of just how many times she said something that unknowingly referenced our natures.

When I had knocked on the door to come into the room a few days after she arrived, she’d opened it and smirked at me.

“What’s up, Carlisle? You don’t need an invitation to come in, do you?”

Then a couple days later, she’d told me she was thinking about getting a new mattress and had asked what my preferences were.

“Do you prefer something firmer? Really firm? Boardlike? Maybe a bed that’s more enclosed on all sides?”

It had struck me as odd questioning but I’d brushed it off, assuming it was part of an existing joke that I wasn’t aware of. But she’d also asked Edward if he could eat garlic bread or if that would hurt him.

When I’d arrived home early from work about a week in, the kids were just getting home from school and we walked in to find Bella watching television. She’d hurriedly scrambled for the remote and turned the television off. When questioned about it by Emmett, she shrugged sheepishly.

“I guess I thought Buffy might be too traumatic and scary for you.”

I wasn’t familiar with what show she was talking about and thought that this was just more of her and Emmett’s good natured ribbing and insults.

One night, a couple weeks in, she’d asked about dinner suggestions or preferences. Meals had been harder for us to cover up, which involved a lot of proclaimed over snacking and eating in the moments she hadn’t been around. Alice told her that it was rare for us to sit down to dinner together since everyone had their own things going on and we tried to manage it at least once a week to catch up. I didn’t know why she still asked what we wanted to eat after being explained away or thanked but rejected. But she continued to ask us anyway.

“How do you guys feel about steaks? Avoid them?”

I hadn’t been able to escape her cooking completely. The morning after she arrived, she’d disappeared into the kitchen and came out with a full breakfast for all of us. While everyone else had been able to sneak food off their plates, she’d stared at me every time I went to take a bite. I’d been flattered at the time because I thought she was so caught up in the joy of being able to spend so much time together. As such, I’d had to chew and swallow every bite of food before I’d faked a page and excused myself to go force it up in the woods.

In retrospect, it was just another thing that added up to an unsettling feeling that something wasn’t right.

Coming home to Bella had been even more wonderful than I’d anticipated. She was always as excited to see me as I was to see her. Even with the teasing and jokes at our expense by the kids, her face lit up as soon as she saw me after I came home and inevitably ended up in my arms within a minute of reuniting. We’d spent nights reading in companionable silence, her curled in my arms or with her feet in my lap, reading her book while I subconsciously rubbed them while doing my own reading. We’d had movie nights and on the one clear night, we’d laid out on a blanket under the stars. She told me more about her mother and what life had been like in Phoenix while I recalled some of the memories I had from my earlier life or some of my favorite family moments over the years -editing out anything that would give our secret away.

It had been alarmingly easy for her to settle into my life like she’d always belonged there and I had to keep reminding myself that this wasn’t permanent. Eventually the danger would pass and Charlie would want his daughter back home.

He definitely wouldn’t be okay finding out that his not-quite-legal-aged daughter had been cozying up with the town doctor who was a perceived fourteen years older than her.

The reality of our age difference would kill him if he ever found out.

Which he wouldn’t because that would be putting his life at risk and even being with Bella for eternity wouldn’t compel me to run that particular danger.

Bella’s impromptu introduction into our home also felt like I was in a constant state of making sure I didn’t let slip our secret. I felt half-truths and flat out redirection coloring countless interactions and I worried about what Edward had warned me of.

Would Bella be more angry, more hurt, perhaps even hate me, when she eventually discovered what we were?

I was trying to protect her but even I couldn’t completely justify away the acrid taste of dishonesty on my tongue whenever she asked a question too close to uncovering what we’d been keeping from her.

I knew that I needed to come clean; that the longer I tried to keep up pretenses -especially with her in the house and so involved in our lives -the worse the fallout would be. Every day that I spent with her, I had to physically swallow down the words, stop myself from just baring every secret, every dark moment of my past, to her.

~~~STY~~~

“Are you sure about this,” I asked Bella as I loaded a tent, sleeping bags and an air mattress into the car. She smiled sunnily at me and my heart stirred in response.

“For the millionth time, yes. Rose said that it isn’t going to rain this weekend and suggested taking advantage of it to get some alone time. Edward told me you guys know some of the best camping places and honestly, I would like to be able to spend some time with you without these pesky kids interrupting us.” I smirked at her over my shoulder.

“Are you trying to subtly tell me you don’t like my kids,” I teased and she sighed.

“I used to think the whole single dad thing was hot but now… I’m just not sure,” she mused mournfully. I laughed and turned, sweeping her into my arms and pressing a kiss to her smiling lips.

“I guess I’m going to have to put them back up for adoption.”

“Like you could talk anyone into taking Emmett,” she groused.

“Technically, Emmett is a legal adult. I could just kick him out.”

“Yeah, what kind of loser lives at home as an adult,” she deadpanned. I heard Emmett grumbling to himself in the house and chuckled.

“Go make sure you have everything you need. I’m going to make sure my demon spawn won’t burn down the house in our absence.” She kissed my cheek before jogging inside and up the stairs to my room. I found Alice behind the house, sitting with her feet in the river and staring into the distance, no doubt shuffling through the visions in her head.

“It will be nice to have some alone time with Bella, don’t you think,” she asked me without turning around. I smiled and came to a stop next to her, looking out into the forest.

“Not that we don’t love you kids but you are so horribly meddlesome,” I complained mildly. She grinned.

“Edward does get a perverse pleasure out of frustrating the two of you.”

“If he’s not careful, the next time Esme and I have to pretend to be married, I’ll be sure to be extra affectionate with her.” Her bell-like laugh rang out over the running water of the river. “Are you sure this is safe for us? You’ve checked the weather and it isn’t supposed to rain this weekend? No sun though, right?”

“Oh ye of little faith, father,” Alice said in mock hurt.

“I just want to make sure that nothing bad is going to happen if we leave for the middle of nowhere for a few days.”

“I understand, Carlisle. I can assure you that nothing bad is going to happen this weekend. Unless Emmett decides to do something particularly stupid but that can’t really be planned for, can it?”

“Is it pick on Emmett day or something,” Emmett asked from inside the house. I grinned.

“Apparently you just need to be more careful with who’s bad side you're getting on,” I suggested. I heard Bella hugging Edward and Esme before skipping down the stairs. “Thank you, Alice. You know where we’ll be. Please alert me immediately if anything changes.” She hummed in acknowledgment and I sped back to the front of the house where Emmett’s Jeep was parked to wait for Bella. She walked out of the house and to my side, an excited smile lighting her face.

“All set,” she said, climbing into the passenger seat while I held the door for her.

“Perfect. I made them promise not to throw a kegger while we’re away but you never know with Emmett,” I teased and she giggled.

“This is child abuse,” Emmett yelled and I threw my head back and laughed before climbing in the Jeep and starting the engine.

“So where are we headed,” Bella asked, turning to watch me as I navigated us away from the house.

“There’s a lovely little spot in Olympic National Forest that we like to visit. It has beautiful vistas and is secluded enough that we’ll be on our own.”

“That sounds perfect,” she breathed. I glanced at her and noticed her eyes growing heavy as we made our way down the highway. Soon the car was filled with the soft sound of her deep and even breathing. I basked in the intimate quiet, thinking maybe she was onto something with her desire for privacy. She didn’t even realize how not private the house was with seven vampires who could hear everything, not to mention the empath, the mind reader and the seer. The quiet of the car with only the sound of our breathing and her heartbeat seemed to shake loose something inside of me and I felt tension I didn’t even know I was holding release from my shoulders.

After about an hour, I pulled off the rutted dirt track I’d been following up the mountain and parked at the edge of a meadow that extended until it ended in a cliff face overlooking the park. I turned to Bella and gently stroked her face. Her eyes fluttered.

“Darling, we’re here.” She blinked her eyes wider and smiled sheepishly at me.

“Sorry, I totally passed out on you.”

“No need to apologize. You haven’t been getting as much rest as you need and you finally relaxed enough for your body to take advantage of it.” She looked around outside the car and gasped.

“Wow. We’re camping here?”

“Yes. This is one of our favorite spots. It’s wild camping by definition but I brought everything we might need to be comfortable. And we can keep the food in the car instead of hoisting it up a tree.” She opened her door and hopped out of the Jeep, breathing in deeply and throwing her head back.

“It smells so fresh up here. I know your house is technically in the woods but there is something about the air out in the wilderness. It just smells… wild. Magical? I don’t know.” I followed her out of the Jeep and wrapped my arms around her from behind, pulling her against me.

“Wait until you see the view,” I murmured in her ear. She turned around in my arms and wrapped hers around my neck.

“The view’s not bad from here.” She smirked. I shook my head with a half smile.

“No view can beat the one from where I stand.” She blushed deeply and I chuckled, rubbing my finger against her heated cheek. “I love it when you blush.”

“And why is that,” she asked cheekily.

“Because it makes me want to devour you whole.”

“That would be some feat. I don’t think I’d agree with you. You’d probably get indigestion.” I threw my head back and laughed. She laughed along with me until I calmed back down.

“I don’t think there’s a single bit of you that any part of me would be at odds with.”

“Well how about we cancel the whole eating me thing and set up this campsite so that I can get dinner started.” I kissed her forehead.

“Fair enough. Go pick a spot for the tent while I unload. Try not to trip over the edge of the cliff, please.” She stuck her tongue out at me as she began to walk away.

“I will have you know I have never tripped and fallen to my death,” she said as she walked away before stumbling and catching herself before she could hit the ground. Her face flamed again and she looked at me and then away. “I did that on purpose.”

“Absolutely.”

“I had to check that the ground was stable. But it’s a bit lumpy so we shouldn’t set up the tent there.”

“Of course. You’re the expert,” I agreed, barely suppressing the laughter building in my chest.

“Yes, I am.” She continued further away from the Jeep, feeling around the ground with her foot. I pulled out gear from the back of the Jeep, gathering the tarp and tent and heading to where she was standing, turning this way and that, looking at the treeline and sky.

“Here,” I asked her.

“Yeah. It’s close enough to the trees that we have some cover if we need it but still open space to set up. Could you set up the tent facing the vista?”

“For you, of course I can.” She grinned and took the other half of the tarp, helping me lay it out flat. We worked in silence and once again I felt myself surprised by the companionable silence we shared with no one there to break the intimacy. She was methodical as she helped me set up the tent, carefully testing the ground before hammering stakes. The desire to just use my enhanced speed to set up the whole thing so that I could just drag her into a sleeping bag and hide from the world was like a breathing thing and I cursed myself for what felt like the millionth time in a week for not sharing my secret with her. Instead, I purposefully took my time setting up, driving the stakes into the ground with my bare hand when she was hammering hers.

Once the tent was complete, I grabbed our sleeping gear from the car while Bella grabbed our bags and we began to set up the interior of the tent. Wanting something cozy but without the feeling like we were crawling over each other to do anything, I’d grabbed one of our four-man tents. After spreading an area rug over the bottom, I set up the fold out queen air mattress and inflated it while Bella unrolled two sleeping bags, unzipped them and then zipped them together to make one large sleeping bag. She helped me make the bed, tossing flirty smiles at me every time our eyes met.

And I couldn’t keep my eyes off of her.

This could be my future.

I could spend the rest of my existence making moments and memories like these, just sharing the same air as her with no pressure to say anything to be anything more than myself.

“Can you grab the cooler for me and I’ll make a fire circle,” she asked sweetly and I smirked, kissing her gently.

“Just don’t hurt yourself doing it,” I teased and she smacked my arm.

“You’re as bad as Edward and Emmett,” she complained and I chuckled. “I guess now I know where they get it from.”

“A family trait, unfortunately. But you are just so easy to tease.”

“Hey, we’re all alone out here. I can push you off the cliff and just tell everyone you were eaten by wolves. I’m the police chief’s daughter; I know how to get away with murder.” I laughed harder at her as she pushed me out of the tent.

“They’d probably believe you.” I left her to scout for rocks and pulled the cooler and cooking gear from the Jeep. I turned to carry it back and stopped. Bella was carrying rocks from near the drop-off to a space near the tent. She had a pile started and she was stacking them next to each other. I muffled a laugh with my hand when she put one down and then pulled her hand away sharply, sticking her thumb in her mouth and sucking while she cursed around it.

God, she was beautiful.

I picked up my load and made my way back to her, sure that if my heart could still beat, it would be pounding. I gently set everything down and continued to watch her, riveted. After the circle was done she finally looked up and noticed my preoccupation.

“What? I only smashed my finger a couple times. And look, no blood!” She held her hand up with a proud smile. I reached out for her hand to pull her into me.

“Bella, there’s something I…” I trailed off.

“What-”

A cloud shifted and a shaft of sunlight pierced through the air and landed right on me. She gasped and I looked down.

My hands were glittering in the sunlight like I was made of crystal.

I looked back up at her in horror, expecting to find shock or anger or disbelief on her face.

Or for her to run from me in horror.

Instead she was staring at me, eyes filled with awe, mouth slightly open. She reached out a hand to touch my face and I held perfectly still as her hand moved across my skin cautiously, as though feeling for the facets of gem the light was reflecting.

I waited for her to ask me what I was.

I waited for horror.

I waited for fear.

“You know,” she finally said, breaking the tense silence, ”I knew it wasn’t turning to ash and I knew it was something conspicuous but sparkling really wasn’t even on my list of possibilities for sunlight’s effect on you.”

“I-”

Wait. What ?

My heart simultaneously stopped and also sped up as I processed her words and then her reaction.

“What do you mean, you knew it was something conspicuous? Bella, what are you talking about?” She bit her lip guiltily as her cheeks warmed.

“I mean, I know that I should have just come clean the minute I figured out what you are but also, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to have a little fun. Just as, you know, payback for keeping me out of the loop and keeping such a huge secret from me.”

“Wait, you know ? How long have you known? No, stop. What do you think I am?” She folded her arms and jutted her hip out, the very picture of sass.

“I know you’re a vampire, Carlisle.” Her words had a glacial effect.

“And how do you know that, Bella,” I asked evenly. “Wait, let me guess; Edward told you. I’ll burn him to ash. I gave them strict instructions that they couldn’t tell you. Of course he didn’t listen.” Her hands flew to her hips and she scowled at me.

“Okay first of all, it wasn’t Edward. I know that he’s meddlesome and manipulative and pushy as hell, but he loves you, Carlisle, and he does actually respect you -even if it doesn’t feel like it sometimes -and he would never betray you like that.” I flinched back from the sharp snap of her biting tone. “Second of all, I figured it out myself. See, I used to spend my summers with Charlie and the ones that we didn’t spend in California, we’d spend in Forks. Or more accurately, we’d spend it in La Push.” I must have made some sort of face because she nodded at me sarcastically. “Yes, the reservation. Charlie would go fishing and I’d run around with Billy Black’s kids. And I spent so much time there that I was invited into the story sessions around the campfire. Of course, I never thought any of the wild and mythical stories they told about changing into wolves and fighting Cold Ones were real. It wasn’t until you guys went camping because the weather was nice and I ran into Rachel Black and Leah Clearwater that I started to make the connection.

“Rachel told me why some of the elders won’t come to the hospital in Forks. She thinks they’re just silly old men but when she reminded me of the old legends, everything just clicked into place for me. It all seemed so obvious once I actually thought about it. And so I confronted Edward about it. That ended up turning into a whole Vampire 101 lesson at my house the day that Charlie arranged for me to stay with you guys. And yes, when the boys suggested that I could take advantage of the fact that you didn’t know that I knew to have a little fun, I was on board. Because I get that there’s a whole security thing with me knowing that it’s supposed to be this big secret but since I found out, all I’ve been wondering is how we could possibly have a real relationship when you were lying to me about one of the most fundamental aspects of who you are. Maybe in the beginning the secret was too important and we were too new and uncertain about where this was headed. But Alice told me about her visions, Carlisle, and once we got closer and it got more serious, I didn’t understand why you wouldn’t tell me. And I’ve spent the last month living with you and making pithy comments and jokes and you never realized that I knew. But what’s more is you just doubled down on the secret keeping. And even though I totally understand why you felt like you needed to protect me, I’m also so hurt that you weren’t telling me when I opened that door for you and created opportunities to be honest with me. Do you just not see a future with me? You don’t want to be with me long term?”

Her eyes were shiny with tears and her throat was tight, giving her words a rough effect. I stared at her, dumbstruck as she poured her heart out to me. She was giving me understanding I didn’t deserve while also holding me accountable and tearing me apart with every word of doubt in my feelings, how much I treasured her.

“Bella, I…” I stopped, my own throat tight with unshed emotion. “I’m so sorry,” I finally croaked and her face crumpled. She fell into my chest, wrapping her arms so tightly around me, it was like she was trying to fuse us into one being. She sobbed against me and I held her as tightly as I could without hurting her, running my hand softly through her hair and placing kisses to the crown of her head. “I’m so, so sorry, darling. I never intended to hurt you. I should have told you, should have found a way to bring it up and discuss it with you as soon as I realized that you were committed to this relationship, to me. I was a coward. I was worried that you would end up finding me wanting and rejecting me. I was scared that I would get a glimpse of heaven with you only to be pulled down to Hell when you realized that you could do better. It’s no excuse. Not only was it disrespectful to you but it was a disservice to treat you like a child when you’re a woman who can make up her own mind. I took the choice from you and I despise myself for it. I hurt you and I will spend every moment you give me trying to make it up to you.”

Her sobs softened as I spoke until she was sniffing in my arms. We stayed like that for several minutes before she lifted her head.

“I know we have a lot to talk about, but there’s something that I have to say that I should have said a while ago and maybe if I had, you would know that I could never - would never -leave you or reject you.” I watched her carefully as she took a deep breath, her eyes never leaving mine. “I love you, Carlisle Cullen.” My breath caught. “I think I’ve loved you since the moment I saw you standing on Charlie’s doorstep with a pizza box in your hand and a smile on your stupidly handsome face. And every time your kids brought you up, I fell a little more for you. Every time I saw you, I fell harder. Each time we talked it was like I was just handing over pieces of my heart to you until you held the entire thing in your hands. And that night when I discovered that you’d been pining for me as hard as I’d been pining for you, I thought that it couldn’t get any more exquisite than that feeling. But then my heart kept growing. When I thought that there wasn’t possibly any room left in my heart, you managed to prove that you could occupy even more space. I love you and learning what you are didn’t change that at all. If anything, I loved you more. I will never leave you. It would be equivalent to me ripping my own soul from myself.”

The shocked silence filled the air around us as I replayed her words over and over in my head at superhuman speed, reveling in the bubbling fire that felt like it was filling me like a balloon, ready to carry me off into the atmosphere. I gently cupped her face, rubbing my thumbs over her cheeks as they burned against my skin. Her eyes were shining and I felt myself smile softly at her before pressing my lips to hers firmly, moving my mouth against the incomparable softness of her lips. Her hands gripped my shoulders tightly and I dragged a hand away from her cheeks to wrap around her waist and back and pull her as tightly to me as safely possible.

And for the first time in over three hundred years of existence, I was sure that this was heaven and I was being rewarded by the most precious of gifts.

Chapter 32: Life Can Be Beautiful

Chapter Text

Yes, yes, I know it's been a while. I apologize. Despite knowing EXACTLY what is going to happen chapter by chapter (unless Edward or someone decides to go off script in which case I will be siccing Bella on them), writing hasn't come easily the last few months. Let's just chalk that up to exhaustion. However, we only have a couple more chapters before things get so intensely crazy that you will hate me. So I'm just going to write as much as I can and try to only post if it means you won't get cliffied for months on end. (Seriously. You're not going to want to read chapter 35 and then have to wait until the rest of me catches up. We're all in this together and we have to make it through in one piece, dammit!)

The song for this chapter is Life Can Be Beautiful by Twelve Titans Music. Remember that you can play along with the story on Amazon Music using the special web address below!

HEY READERS! Want to be able to play all the songs from this story in order while you read? Well now you can! Just visit: https colon slash slash .com slash user-playlists slash 83eaf70f5fd2488da12e8f0787411603sune?ref=dm_sh_670a-24ac-70cc-3d48-5036e (Remember to replace the words with the punctuation and no spaces!)

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO: Life Can Be Beautiful
CPOV

She knew.

I still felt like I was floating between disbelief and complete relief. The weight of the secrets I had been carrying and keeping from her had lifted and left me feeling infinitely lighter. But in their place, I was now even more worried about her safety. If the Volturi discovered that I was dating a human who knew our secret, I wasn’t sure how they would react.

Condescension and disbelief that I was having a relationship with a human, probably. But after the amusem*nt wore off, would they view her as a threat? I had no immediate plans to change Bella and if Aro knew that, he would consider her a security risk and undoubtedly have her taken care of. Despite our close relationship in the past, I was well aware of how paranoid and powermad my friends were. They couldn’t risk anything that threatened their control. I was already enough of an oddity, not to mention my family.

Would our past be enough to keep her out of danger?

“You’re thinking so hard that I can see smoke floating out of your ears,” Bella teased with a bump to my shoulder. I chuckled and pulled her closer to me. She rested her head against my shoulder. It fit like it had been carved for no other reason than to hold her there comfortably.

“I was lost in my thoughts. I’m still trying to reconcile with the reality that you not only know what I am but that you love me.”

“Um, have you met you? How could anyone not love you?” I smiled into her hair and pressed a gentle kiss to the top of her head.

“You might be a little biased. Or maybe there’s some genetic defect that means that you’re lured in by all of the mechanisms that my kind possess to draw humans to us but you aren’t affected by the survival instincts you own that are supposed to warn you away from predators.”

“Did you just say I’m defective?”

“Only in the best ways,” I answer glibly and she narrows her eyes at me.

“You know, Edward said that my brain was defective and it’s genetic. I’m starting to get the feeling that he takes after his father more than I originally thought.” I threw my head back and laughed, holding her against me as she shook with her own laughter.

“I promise I will punish him suitably when we get home. The nerve of him.”

“He probably has a punishment kink for all the good it does,” she mutters and I couldn’t help the broad smile that seemed to have taken up permanent residence on my face.

“I’d rather not think about what Edward does and does not like, thank you very much.”

“It’s not like you don’t know intimate details of everyone in the house. How does that work, by the way? Do you just leave? Do they leave? Is everyone just cool with hearing what everyone else is doing?” Her cheeks are flushed and I know that while she is being cool and unaffected in tone, she’s at least a little flustered asking about this.

“It’s something you get used to. Most of the time, it takes almost no effort at all to tune everyone else out. But there are times where we separate for some semblance of privacy. I’ve gone out to give them space and they’ve also left in deference to my feelings. We’re comfortable with each other and that makes it easier and less awkward than you’d imagine.”

“No offense but I don’t know how someone could ever be okay knowing what Emmett and Rose are doing. He strikes me as someone who is loud. But then I try not to think about it because they haven’t invented a way to safely bleach your brain and I don’t know if I can live with the horrors of their love stained on my memory.”

“We all live with the trauma.” She sighs and snuggles closer to me under the sleeping bag. We sit in silence for a few minutes before I feel her tense the tiniest bit.

“Edward and the kids didn’t tell me much about your past. They said it was your story to tell. I just got the bare bones of it. I don’t want to pry but I am so curious now that there isn’t anything standing in the way.”

“I’ll tell you anything you want to know,” I say simply and she pulls away to sit across from me, no doubt to watch my face as I tell her my morbid history.

“Start at the beginning. The stuff that you told me about your dad; was that real?”

“Yes. He was a pastor and he wanted me to follow in his footsteps. He was a vicious man. He saw evil everywhere, especially in the innocent. He was willing, eager even, to accuse innocent people of witchcraft or being evil beings. When I began to study under him, he was disappointed because I didn’t see the same things he did. I approached such accusations far more cautiously and with a demand for more evidence than just suspicion. He hated it, hated me. Ironically enough, we did find a vampire.” Her breath catches and I rub a hand over her thigh soothingly, not just for her but also for myself. “We tracked him to the sewers but we had no idea what we were really up against. He was feral, starving and as soon as I came upon him, he attacked me.” I pull my jacket collar aside to show her my neck. She leans into me, inspecting it with her hands. The scars aren’t as visible to the human eye but there is some texture to it. “He ripped my throat apart. I thought that was the end. Just the blinding, excruciating pain and the fear that I was going to die in the sewer, choking on my own blood.” Her face is a mask of horror and grief and I pull her into my arms and hold her to me gently.

“I’m not sure why he didn’t drink me dry. I can only assume that he was so far gone that he didn’t even realize he’d left me alive. The change is… ghastly. Three days of nothing but the worst pain of your life; the kind of pain that makes you wish you were dead. You aren’t aware of what’s going on around you. You just hear your dying heartbeat in your ears and feel the fire of venom burning through every cell in your body. When I woke up, everything was different. My senses were heightened to a degree that was alarming and disorienting. Newborns are ruled by instinct, much like animals. Nothing is more important than thirst. I don’t know what was different about me. Maybe my brain is genetically defective too-” she huffs out a laugh “-but I ran away from the chance to see anyone, to be the monster that I had now become and that had changed me. It was months of hellish torture but I managed to stay away from humans. But the longer I went without feeding, the weaker I became and I felt like I was going as mad as the beast that had changed me.

“I was so far gone to thirst that I stumbled on a herd of deer and I had no other thought but to kill and feed. It wasn’t ambrosia: even in my state I was aware that what I was drinking was not the prey I was designed to kill. But it sated my thirst and with that out of the way, reason returned. I obsessed over the theory that I didn’t need human blood to survive. I could subsist on animal blood and while it would never be as appealing, it would allow me to retain the piece of myself that I held the most value in: my humanity. I spent months staying away from civilization while I worked on mastering my control. I refused to be the same mindless monster as the thing that had changed me and whether you believe that it was that stubborn desire or, like Jasper, you believe that control is my supernatural gift, it worked. I was able to sneak back to the village I lived in and spy on my father. I’ve already told you this part but now knowing what I am, you know that I couldn’t see him on his deathbed. There were so many things I wanted to say to him but I wouldn’t risk my control for him. When he died, I realized there was nothing really tying me to England. So I made my way to the continent, determined to explore it and to integrate into society. While I was in Italy, I was in a small town and I realized too late that it was watched by vampires.

“My experience with others of my kind before hadn’t given me much reason to trust. Some were more civilized than others but for the most part, they were all ruled by their animalistic need. These vampires were different. They were refined and cultured. They lived together and enjoyed things like music and the arts. They patronized many famous artists and musicians, serving as inspiration. And with them, I found something I had been yearning for since my change: companionship. We became friends and while they teased me mercilessly about my peculiar and ‘unnatural’ diet, we were still able to mutually respect each other. I stayed with them for a long time. But eventually, I knew that I couldn’t stay. They are the law of our kind. A self-declared mission for them but they have the strength and numbers to be the judge, jury and executioner for those that risk the one law we are all bound to: secrecy.

“It wasn’t as bad in the middle ages but with modern invention and industrial revolution came the need for more caution. The Volturi monitor exposure risks and deal with them accordingly. But even I could see that my friends valued their power and position above all else. Despite arguing my side, I knew they would never give up their diet and watching as their victims were paraded in began to wear on me. I valued humanity above all else and I couldn’t continue to watch them play at being civilized while feeding like nothing more than animals. I got lucky that around the same time, America was being colonized. I booked myself on board a ship and made my way across the ocean to start fresh.

“I had consumed any kind of medical knowledge I could get my hands on and I was determined to start making a difference. My kind killed so many; I wanted to try and counterbalance that loss by saving as many as I could. Life was good for a while. I was a respected member of the community, even if most felt an aversion to me that they couldn’t explain. I made friends. I lived through the revolution trying to save as many people as I could. I had a dear friend who was turned on the battlefield and while I tried to convince him to adopt my lifestyle, he didn’t want to go against our natures. And that’s how I spent the time before Edward; yearning for companionship, camaraderie, someone to share my views of humanity. And then the Spanish Influenza hit Chicago where I was working.” Her hand tightened on my arm.

“Edward,” she murmured.

“Yes. I was working insane hours. I would have worked more but humans start to notice when you go without sleep with no side effects. It was… unimaginable. The sheer numbers coming in were overwhelming, even for me. And there was still very little we could do for any of them. It was a constant fight. I had treated Edward’s father but he succumbed quickly. Not so quickly that I wasn’t reminded of my own father,” I said grimly. “Edward’s mother was… completely different. She worried only for her son. Whenever she was lucid, she asked how he was doing, begged us to help him. When she was lost to the fever, she still only muttered about him. Towards the end, I was trying to help keep her comfortable and she grabbed my hand, looked me in the eye and said ‘save my son. You can save him. Please save him.’. I still don’t know if she knew what I was or if she was just so desperate for him and so close to death that she would have asked the same of anyone. And then I was left with a conundrum.

“I could save him. I had been toying with the idea of creating a companion. Someone who had the same values I did. Perhaps if I changed someone and they only ever knew the diet I followed, they wouldn’t be as adverse to it. But I loathed my transition and I hated the monster that had changed me. I couldn’t be that to someone else, couldn’t condemn them to the same hell that I lived in. I wouldn’t. But here was this boy, on the cusp of manhood, about to succumb to the same disease that had stolen his parents. He wasn’t going to survive. If I changed him, he could have a whole life, filled with whatever he wanted. I stewed over it for days. I couldn’t erase her grip on my hand, the despair in her eyes when she asked me to save him. It was a gamble waiting that long; he could have died at any time before I made my decision. I’d like to say it was a selfless act on my part; that I simply wanted him to have the chance at a life his mother had been so desperate for. But I was so lonely, Bella. I craved someone like I craved blood. It was an ache inside of me.” She pressed her hands to my cheeks and pulled my face down to hers, pressing her forehead against mine.

“I am so sorry that you had to spend so much of your life alone,” she whispered. I closed my eyes and pressed her closer to me.

“It was hell while it was happening but I would do it a hundred times over for the promise of you.” She blushed deeply and pressed a kiss to my lips.

“What was he like as a newborn? He’s annoying as hell now; I can’t imagine what he was like when he was basically running on his hindbrain.” I chuckled.

“It was confusing for him at first. It’s a lot to process and even though our brains can process so much more, it doesn’t make it any easier. He was devastated the first few years about his mother. There was no love lost with his father but knowing that his mother suffered before she died really bothered him. And I was basically a stranger. Add to that that he was still a teenage boy and let’s be honest, they aren’t great at communicating: it was a lot for him. But as time moved on, we both adjusted to having a new life. He didn’t really fight me about my diet but I know it was a struggle for him. Plus it turns out he’s a mind reader and that was a shock to both of us. One of the Volturi can read minds but his gift differs from Edward’s. Edward can hear what anyone is thinking at any given moment within a certain distance. Aro has to touch you but once he does, he can see any thought you’ve ever had in your lifetime.”

“That sounds awful. Who would subject themselves to that level of invasion?”

“Anyone who doesn’t want a swift and permanent punishment, usually.” Aro might have been a friend but I could still recognize a dictator when I saw one.

“You’ve lived through so much,” she muttered. “I don’t understand how you can have any interest in me after everything you’ve seen and experienced.”

“All of it pales in comparison, Bella.” She scoffed and I tilted her chin up so she met my gaze. “You are the thing I have been searching for all of my life. I told you that the desire to have someone with me was like an ache and it was. But there’s been another ache that no one else has ever soothed. Until you. I met you and it was like I’ve spent my whole life with a cavern in some deep, dark part of me and then suddenly, I was full. Complete. I am happy to share all of my experiences with you but don’t believe for one minute that you are not the best, most important and most exciting thing to ever happen to me. I hang on every word and worship every breath, mon amour. I’ve endured everything for this, here and now with you.” She let out a shuddery breath against my lips.

“You know, it’s really hard to stay solid when you say stuff like that. It’s like you’re trying to get me to melt into a puddle of Bella Soup.” I huffed out a laugh.

“Edward used to tell me I have no game. It’s nice to see that he was wrong and it was all about the audience.” I leaned in and brushed a soft kiss against her lips.

“I don’t know why you’d ever listen to Edward anyway. It’s Alice you have to watch out for.”

“She is truly terrifying.”

“It’s a good thing she’s on our side, then,” she said cheekily. I hummed and pressed my face into her neck, breathing her in. “It’s very hard to think when you do that,” she whispered and I smiled against her skin.

“Then stop thinking.”

“I want to but I feel like there’s so much we should talk about but also that maybe we shouldn’t talk about any of it at all.”

“We can talk about whatever you want. I will answer any question you ask.”

“Okay. Edward told me you guys move around a lot to avoid suspicion. Is that… is that something you’re going to have to do soon?”

“We have a couple of years.” Her breath whooshed out of her. “Usually we can stay long enough for Edward and Alice to get through high school and maybe a year or two after that, depending on where it is. Forks allows us the rare opportunity to spend most of our days outside but we have been to places where the kids take night courses at a college.”

“Where will you go after this?”

“I don’t know,” I say honestly. “But I promise we won’t leave you behind unless you ask us to. Wherever you’re going, I’m going with you.” She smirked.

“That’s mighty stalkerish of you, Doctor Cullen. What if I go someplace that’s always sunny like Arizona or Hawaii?”

“Then I will spend all my days indoors trying to convince you to stay with me and I’ll spend every night walking with you under the stars and still trying to convince you to stay with me.” She laughed and pushed me away teasingly.

“You make me sound so fickle! We both know that you would hardly need to exert effort to get me to stay with you all day. I’d say you’re like an addiction but that sort of implies the ability to give you up and I can’t. Not at all.” I grinned like the fool in love that I was.

“I’m so sorry,” I said without a drop of remorse. She rolled her eyes at me and then snuggled closer. I pulled the sleeping bag up over her shoulders to keep her warm and she hummed.

“Thank you for telling me all of this,” she said through a yawn. I stroked my fingers through her hair slowly.

“Anytime, darling.”

“I don’t suppose you have any pictures from throughout the ages, do you? I know you haven't any from when you were young but I’ve gotta admit that the idea of seeing nineteen-sixties Carlisle does something to me.”

“Oh wait until you see Rococo Carlisle,” I teased. “I know you have that thing for the Scarlet Pimpernel. The knee breeches will make you swoon.”

Chapter 33: One Last Dance

Chapter Text

Whelp this is it folks. The last chapter before we start getting down to brass tacks. Or whatever vampires get down to when things difficult. I'm so excited and you should be too! I've been writing at work (I have a disgusting amount of free time to fill) so hopefully I write enough chapters that we can start posting regularly!

The song for this chapter is One Last Dance by Us the Duo. Remember that you can play along with the story on Amazon Music using the special web address below!

HEY READERS! Want to be able to play all the songs from this story in order while you read? Well now you can! Just visit: https colon slash slash .com slash user-playlists slash 83eaf70f5fd2488da12e8f0787411603sune?ref=dm_sh_670a-24ac-70cc-3d48-5036e (Remember to replace the words with the punctuation and no spaces!)

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE: One Last Dance
BPOV

I pulled the door open and smiled at the receptionist, Patrice. She smiled back at me widely.

“Bella! We haven’t seen you in forever! How are you doing?”

“I’m doing well, thanks. How are you? How’s Alfie doing on that new diet,” I asked, leaning against the front of her desk.

“He’s doing so much better. He’s mad I won’t let him have human food anymore but he’s already lost so much weight and is so active again. Do you want to see a picture?” I nodded and looked at the picture she’d pulled up on her phone. It was an action photo of a corgi in the middle of catching a ball.

“He looks great! I hope I get to see him soon and get some cuddles in.”

“He’d love that. Anyway, are you here to see your dad?”

“If he’s got a minute. I know that you guys are burning the candle at both ends these days.”

“That’s an understatement. But I’m sure he can take a break to see you. Head on back to his office.” I thanked her and headed for the back of the building. The bullpen was normally slow and quiet, deputies exchanging pleasantries and stories more often than not. But it was almost unrecognizable. People were moving between desks and rooms, talking on the phone and to each other, calling out to coworkers. There were far more people than our little station even employed and in one of the side rooms, I could briefly see people standing in front of a board. I looked around for Charlie, assuming he’d be in the thick of things instead of holed up in his office. I was right when I found him standing outside one of the interview rooms, talking to an unfamiliar woman in a pantsuit. He looked over at me as I walked toward him and then did a double take. His face pulled down into a disapproving frown and he excused himself before making his way over to me quickly.

“Bella, what are you doing here?” He gently grabbed my elbow and guided me to his office, closing the door behind him.

“I know it’s a surprise visit, but I haven’t seen you in a while and talking on the phone is great but I do need to occasionally see you to ensure you aren’t succumbing to a diet of pizza and old takeout,” I teased quietly. His face softened and he pulled me into a tight hug.

Growing up, I’d always felt a little bit of awkwardness hugging Charlie. He was my dad and it should have been natural but we didn’t see each other much and add to that the fact that we were both criminally shy; it made things awkward. But time and age -and probably living with him these past few months -had made me appreciate Charlie’s hugs. He wasn’t an overly emotive man. But when he hugged me, it felt like safety and protection. I knew he had my back and there was an innate sense of home that I used to only feel with my mom. Sometimes when Carlisle hugged me it felt similar but also completely different. I knew he would protect me and back me as well, but with Carlisle, hugging provided a completeness, like part of me was missing until we were holding each other again. With Charlie, it felt like when you’ve been away from home for a while and that relief that comes from being back in familiar surroundings, of being able to relax and unwind.

I’d missed him the past couple weeks.

“I’ve missed you, Bells, but things are pretty hectic right now. I had you staying with the Cullens to keep you away from this mess.” We were going to skate over the fact that he had initially lied about why I was staying with them and the truth had come out accidentally on a phone call when he’d been too tired to keep his story straight.

“I know and I promise that this won’t be a regular occurrence. I just…”

“What is it? Did something happen? Is someone threatening you?” He grabbed me, panicked.

“No, nothing like that. I just wanted to talk to you. Not the way we do on the phone. I just felt like… I don’t know. Maybe I’m just feeling a bit disconnected since it’s been so long.”

“Me too, kid. It’s been rough not seeing you. I really, really miss your cooking. There’s only so much pizza a man can eat before he starts craving salad, of all things.” I laughed.

“Well, if I come see you again, I’ll be sure to bring something a bit more satisfying.”

He sat down in the chair in front of his desk and I took the one next to it.

“How’s school since you’ve been staying home? Is life with the Cullens good? You haven’t been taking things too far with Edward, have you? I’m busy but I’m never too busy to shoot him,” he grumbled and I laughed.

“School is fine. Living with the Cullens is different but they’ve been great. Esme goes out of her way to make me feel welcomed. And no, Dad, I haven’t taken things with Edward too far. I promise we aren’t doing anything you wouldn’t be okay with witnessing.” He mumbled disgruntledly under his breath and I smiled. “He’s a good guy, Dad. They’re all good guys. For all that Emmett loves his pranks and jokes, he’s respectful and loyal. Edward lives to stir the pot and try to put Carlisle in an early grave, but he always knows where the line is. He completely respects my boundaries.”

“I know they’re good kids, Bells. It’s just weird to know you’re living with your boyfriend. I trust you, but teenage boys are monsters. I should know: I was one.” I stifled a mortified laugh.

If only he knew that my boyfriend wasn’t a teenager at all but actually centuries old and a member of the fanged undead.

“I promise that even though Edward is a monster in some ways, he’s respectful and he cares about me. You don’t have to worry, I promise. Plus Esme and Carlisle would never let anything happen. They don’t want to break your trust.”

“I guess that’s true. Just promise that if he crosses the line, you’ll tell me so I can shoot him.”

“If he tries anything, I’ll shoot him.”

“That’s more reassuring than you know, Bella. You’ve always been such a good kid. Your mom… she did a good job.” His voice was thick at the end and I felt my eyes grow hot. I didn’t think about my mom as much as I used to. I knew that this meant I was healing and moving past my grief but when reminders of her hit, remembering her loss felt so poignant.

“Will you… will you tell me how you and mom met? I’ve only ever heard her version.” He stared at me for a minute, eyes shiny.

“We met when I was in college. She was taking a gap year and it was her first time in Seattle. I was at UDub, finishing my degree in criminal justice. I was walking to class and it was pouring rain. I didn’t see her until I’d already run into her. She was just standing there, in the rain with her face up to the sky, getting soaking wet. She was… enchanting. Like she was a desert flower and this was the first water after a long drought. I couldn’t take my eyes off her. I tried to apologize for bumping into her but she just grabbed my hand and started talking.”

“What did she talk about?” He smiled fondly.

“Everything. She was going on about the rain and then about her trip and her hometown. She just kept talking and she was like… magic. She was bright and bubbly and so uninhibited. I couldn’t have resisted her if I’d tried. She drew me in and I was caught. We spent every spare minute together that we could. She even snuck into some of my lectures with me,” he said, chuckling. “We got married a few months after that. Everyone told us it was fast but I couldn’t picture my life without her in it. After I finished school, we had planned on moving to California. There was a job in San Francisco that I had applied for. But my dad got sick and my mom couldn’t really take care of him. So we decided to come to Forks. I knew the chief at the time and he pulled some strings to get me a place on the force. I used to wonder… if she resented me for bringing her here instead of what we’d planned. This is a small town, Bella, and your mom… your mom wasn’t made for small towns. The people here thought she was too much: too exuberant, too loud, too bright, too opinionated. I tried to make up for it but it wasn’t enough. We had you about a year after we moved here and you were -are -perfect. She was so excited to have a baby. She absolutely doted on you. I thought that maybe it would change things; that maybe having you would make it easier for her to be here. But it didn’t. Eventually, it got to be too much and she just couldn’t handle it anymore: this town, how much of my time and energy my parents needed, staying in one place.”

He was silent for a few moments while I pictured the story he’d told me. Mom’s story hadn’t really been different, although she’d waxed poetic about Forks and all of its failings. And after hearing his side, I now wondered if maybe she had convinced herself that they didn’t love each other after she left. Hearing it from Charlie’s point of view, especially when I could see how much it still affected him, was heartbreaking.

“She took you with her and as much as I never wanted to be separated from either of you, I could see that being here was hurting her and changing her. I couldn’t do that to her. But I couldn’t leave my parents. So I did what would hurt you both the least.”

“You still love her,” I said softly and he nodded, scrubbing a hand over his face. “How did you know, in the beginning? I mean, you said so yourself that people told you how fast it was. How did you know that the risk was worth it?”

“I just knew. Even from the beginning, when I was with Renee, it was like… like a part of me had been missing and when we were together, I was whole. Like I hadn’t been taking full breaths until she was around and then suddenly, I could breathe even though I didn’t know I wasn’t until I felt the difference. That never changed. Even after… when I would meet her to get you or to take you back to her, it felt like that. When she got sick… Bella, I wanted nothing more than to forget everything I had here and just leave it all behind to be there with you and her. But Phil was in the picture and it wasn’t my place. After he left, I offered to come but she made me promise not to.” I wiped messily at the tears on my face. I’d never known that Charlie had loved my mom after all this time. That he’d loved her until the end, just like me. He pulled me into a hug. “I am so sorry you lost her, Bells. If I could have spared you that pain, I would have.” I gave a watery laugh.

“I’m sorry you lost her, too,” I said. “But I’m happy that I got to get to know you better. I love you, Dad.” He gave a suspicious sniff.

“I love you too, Bella. Always have and always will.” We held each other for a few minutes before I pulled back and we both awkwardly wiped at our eyes. Charlie handed me a tissue and I tried to clean myself up before it was time to go. I knew I’d already taken up more time than he probably had to give. “Now, as much as I hate it, I have to get back to work and you need to get back to the Cullen's house. I’ll call you later, okay?” I nodded and stood up, taking a minute to gather myself.

“Kick ass, Dad,” I said to him as I was leaving and he blew out a breath and then huffed out a laugh.

“Doing the best I can, Bells.” I hugged him again before heading out of his office. He had a couple of his officers walk me out to the car. Rosalie was in the driver seat, reading a magazine when I got in.

“Ready to go, Izzy B?” I smiled at the new nickname Emmett had used that had caught on.

“Yeah.”

~~~

By the time we got home, Carlisle was already there. He’d changed into gray sweatpants and a black v-neck tee. I found him sitting on the couch when we walked in. As soon as I saw him, I walked over to him and buried my face in his chest.

“Hello, beautiful,” he murmured, wrapping his arms around me. “Did you have a nice visit with your dad?” A sob burst out of me as I wrapped my arms around his waist. “Bella? Are you okay? What happened?” I shook my head, trying to catch my breath enough to answer him. “Is Charlie okay?” I nodded awkwardly.

“Can you just hold me for a while,” I whispered tearfully.

“Of course, darling.” He bent down to sweep me up into his arms and sped us up the stairs to his room. He laid me gently on the bed before climbing in next to me and pulling the blankets up around us.

And then he just held me quietly while I cried. While I missed my mom so much that I felt like an exposed nerve. While I cried for my dad, who had found true love and happiness with my mom only to lose her and let us both go at his own expense. I cried because Charlie had perfectly described how I felt about Carlisle.

And I cried because I knew that this meant that one day, I’d have to willingly say goodbye to my father when I chose to be with Carlisle forever and we faked my death.

And I cried because I knew it would break him.

Chapter 34: Forever Young

Chapter Text

Hey remember when I said the last chapter was the last chapter before things got exciting. Yeah, fun story, I can't count apparently. So enjoy this little nugget. The next chapter will require a seatbelt. Maybe even one of those harness things like in Emmett's Jeep. Actually, you might need one of the restraints like they use on really fast roller coasters. Sorry, not sorry.

The song for this chapter is Forever Young by Becky Hill. Remember that you can play along with the story on Amazon Music using the special web address below!

HEY READERS! Want to be able to play all the songs from this story in order while you read? Well now you can! Just visit: https colon slash slash .com slash user-playlists slash 83eaf70f5fd2488da12e8f0787411603sune?ref=dm_sh_670a-24ac-70cc-3d48-5036e (Remember to replace the words with the punctuation and no spaces!)

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR: Forever Young

BPOV

“Are you going to tell us what happened when you went to see your dad last week?” I rolled my eyes at Edward’s nagging.

“Sure, maybe in a few months. I’ve learned my secret-keeping from the best after all,” I added lightly. He grinned at me and I felt myself smile back.

I could admit that I’d been in a funk the last week. Between the wave of grief that seemed to crest over me after listening to Charlie talk about my mom and the breakthrough moment of realizing that I wanted to spend eternity with Carlisle and acknowledging the cost of such a choice, I was exhausted and melancholy. Carlisle didn’t ask after I’d come home and broken down in his arms. After establishing that I wasn’t hurt or in danger, he gave me room to process what I was feeling. Edward, on the other hand, hadn’t given me any such relief. He’d immediately started asking the next morning and a week later, it seemed that he hadn’t let it go.

“Rosalie said you had a nice, albeit bittersweet, conversation with your father. She doesn’t know why you were so upset. Carlisle says that you’ll tell him -us -when you’re ready but if it’s something that has you this upset still, it has to be serious.” I sighed and he fixed me with an unimpressed look. “Look, I know it has something to do with your mom because Jasper told me that you’ve been feeling a lot of grief. But I don’t think that’s all it is.”

“There is literally no privacy in this house, is there? Between Jasper cataloging everyone’s emotions, Alice looking into the future and your mind-reading, no one has any semblance of privacy or personal space.”

“To be fair, you don’t really have to worry about the last one,” he reminded me, a slight furrowing of his brow betraying frustration for my immunity to his little gift.

“That’s true but toss in that you all have superhuman hearing and it kind of negates that argument, doesn’t it?”

“Bella.” I looked up from the book I was pretending to read at the seriousness in his voice. He was watching me, all humor erased from his face. I didn’t need Jasper’s gift to see that he was concerned, no matter how annoying he was about it. My shoulders slumped and I leaned back into the couch.

“Go get Alice and I’ll tell you guys what’s going on,” I mumbled as I scrubbed my hands over my face.

“Please, Bella, as if I didn’t already know you needed me,” Alice said from the stairs, startling me. “I saw as soon as you decided to tell him and came right down.” I laughed humorlessly and fidgeted while she settled into her seat. We sat in silence for a minute while I tried to decide how to approach this conversation with them.

“You’re right that I’ve been sad. And some of it is about my mom. I didn’t realize until I talked to Charlie last week, but he still loves my mom. He’s always loved my mom. I thought that he was… like everyone else. That he thought she was too much; too loud, too energetic, too flighty, too irresponsible. Even though she left him, I spent my entire life assuming that he was okay with her leaving. But he told me about how they met, how he fell in love with her in an instant. He told me that he didn’t want to lose either of us but he didn’t want to hurt us either and so he didn’t try and make her stay or come back or anything. And he also told me that when Phil left my mom after she started cancer treatments, he offered to come help her… us. But my mom made him promise that she wouldn’t. And I never knew that.

“I spent most of my life being the responsible one, taking care of my mom and making sure that the bills got paid and stuff. And when she got sick, it wasn’t so bad because Phil was there to help shoulder the burden and to take her to appointments and get up with her in the night when the chemo was making her even sicker. But then he left. He said he didn’t sign up for this, watching her die. And it hurt but not because I was sad he was gone. It hurt because now, I was the one who was getting her to appointments and treatments. I was the one staying with her in the hospital when she got sick because the chemo was killing her immune system. I was the one who held her hand through all of it, who tried to keep her spirits up, who helped pass the time as the cancer and the treatments sucked the life out of her. I was the one standing in the hall outside her room, or the bathroom so that she didn’t have to see me crying. I was the one watching her die.” My voice faltered as sobs choked my throat. Edward and Alice were immediately pressed on either side of me, holding me and rubbing my back and arms soothingly. I pressed a hand to my mouth, just like I’d done countless times in the hospital and at home, to try and hold everything inside.

“I went through all of that and I just found out that I didn’t have to do it all alone. I didn’t have to suffer in silence, by myself, exhausted and breaking. My dad would have been there in a heartbeat. He would have helped me shoulder that burden, would have spared me from having to watch cancer suck my mother’s life and vitality from her body until she finally succumbed to it. I wouldn’t have had to be alone, holding her hand while she took her last breaths, completely unrecognizable from the woman who raised me. Charlie could have -would have -been there to save me from that but my mom stopped him. She made him promise not to do that. She had the option to save me from all of that -to some degree -and instead she made him stay away so that those were my final memories of her. So I was as exhausted as she was. And Charlie! It probably killed him, knowing what she was going through, knowing that I was the one taking care of her and having to shoulder that burden alone!

“So I’m sad, yes. I’m sad because now I’m looking at everything in my entire life through different eyes. I feel so sad for my mom because I think she loved Charlie too but she couldn’t stay here. And I don’t think she was ever loved again the way she was loved by him. She spent her entire life settling. And I’m mad because it didn’t have to be that way at the end. It didn’t have to be her and I alone. It didn’t have to be just me. But she made that decision for me and chose for me to carry that burden on my shoulders by myself.” I stopped, sucking in lungfuls of air and attempting to calm myself down. Edward stared at me, pity in every line of his face and a hint of that signature righteous anger that he always seemed to carry. Alice was resting her head against my shoulder, curled up against my side.

“I know grief is a process but I feel like I’ve been flung into a pool and I can’t keep my head above water,” I admitted quietly. “I don’t know how to get over this. How to forgive her for this. I feel like it could eat me up inside if I let it. But I feel… cheated. Like… my life could have been different; even just the last couple of years could have been so different for me. But I’m carrying things around now that I can’t just get rid of and it’s like a physical weight. Or at least now it feels like a weight. Sometimes, I don’t notice at all. But knowing all of this changes everything in my head.” I slumped against them and Alice reached out to hold my hand, Edward mirroring her.

“The hardest part of growing up,” Edward murmured quietly, “is that your perspective starts to change. You mature and grow and things that didn’t even hit your radar as a kid suddenly make sense in a way you never expected. It doesn’t make it any easier. But you can’t let yourself drown in could-haves and what-ifs. You will be miserable if you focus on all the things you wish had happened or that had happened differently. You can’t change anything. I wish you could. I wish I could change it for you. But everything happened the way that it happened and there’s nothing we can do to change that. I spent a lot of time after my change resenting my father. Living with Carlisle, experiencing the gentle way that he corrected and guided me, supported and praised me… my father was not like that. I hated that he was demanding and belittling, that he demeaned my mother just because she was a woman. That he was a living, breathing example of misogyny at its finest. I was letting it consume me until Carlisle sat me down one day. He told me that my father did the best he could. He did the best he could. Did he fall short? Yes. But he was who he was and holding him to Carlisle’s standard was unfair because that’s not who he was.

“Your mom did the best she could. She fell short and you suffered as a consequence. But she did the best she could.” I wiped my eyes on my sleeve. Of course Carlisle could provide the context to help fix this. “Your mother loved you. I don’t need to have met her to know that she loved you deeply. Knowing what you know now doesn’t change that fact. But you can’t change anything and even if you could, would you be the same person you are now? It’s so easy to focus on what we’ve lost without thinking about what we would lose. Don’t let yourself be eaten up by what your mother should have done. Love her for the good things she gave you and remember that she was a human with failings.”

“I know you’re being all wise and emotionally intelligent but I feel like maybe you should be a little more Team Bella right now,” I teased. He laughed.

“I will always be Team Bella. But being on Team Bella means that if I can help save you from yourself, I will. In fact, I’ve never met someone who needs saving so often. You are a walking hazard.” I punched his arm lightly, not in the mood to add a broken hand to this year’s injury tally.

“You said this was only some of it. Is there something else you want to talk to us about,” Alice asked quietly. I began to fidget with the hem of my sweater.

“Yes. Promise me right now that you will let me finish before you say anything.”

“Promise!” They shouted together. I chuckled.

“Okay. So talking to Charlie was really nice. When he talked about how my mom made him feel, I realized that he and I are alike in more ways than I thought. The way he describes meeting my mom and what it was like being with her is exactly how I feel about Carlisle.” I took a deep breath. “I know that when you guys came over to my house and told me about vampires and stuff that you had this expectation that I would just change to be with him. And I wasn’t opposed to that, really. But it was also such a huge concept for me to wrap my head around and I don’t think I really gave it the kind of thought that I would need to in order to make a decision about it. It just felt like a thing that I wouldn’t have to worry about for a while and so I didn’t need to think about the details or consequences or anything. But I realized after talking to him that changing to be with Carlisle means that I’m going to have to make Charlie think I’m dead. And it’s going to break his heart. I don’t think I’d ever really considered how much it’s going to hurt him to lose me. And then one day, he will die for real and I won’t be there for him when he does. And it breaks my heart to know that I’m going to do that to him.” Tears fell freely from my eyes and I pulled my legs up to my chest. The sound of the front door opening and closing stopped Edward and Alice from responding. I looked up. Carlisle was standing by the piano, ochre eyes locked on me. He approached slowly, even by human standards.

“Edward, Alice, give us a moment,” he said softly. Alice hopped up in that inhumanly graceful way she did. She was grinning as she skipped from the room, presumably to find Jasper. Edward kissed my temple and squeezed my hand before he got up, clapping Carlisle on the shoulder as he passed him. Carlisle didn’t even acknowledge it. He knelt down in front of me. His eyes were full of heartbreak and hope, even as he kept his features schooled. He reached toward me achingly slowly before gently cradling my head in his hands, thumbs wiping at the tears on my cheeks.

“I am so sorry, darling,” he said softly. “I had no idea you were feeling like this.”

“You heard,” I asked tearfully.

“I got home just after Alice came down. I was going to come in but I also didn’t want to deprive you of the opportunity to talk about it. But I couldn’t make myself leave. I’ve been so worried about you, Bella. I should have left and given you privacy but I wanted to be sure you weren’t in danger.”

“I should have told you sooner. I should have talked to you about it. I know you’ve been concerned and I should have just confided in you. I probably would have felt better sooner.”

“Bella,” he whispered and then hung his head for a moment. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to sacrifice your father for my sake,” he said brokenly. “I don’t want you to have to give up anything just for me. I would never ask that of you. All of my children would readily tell you about the things that have been lost and sacrificed because I brought them into this life. Rosalie always wanted children and it has been a loss that she feels keenly, even after all this time. I don’t want that for you. I don’t want you to feel like you have to choose between me and your father. I will happily and readily stay with you forever with no expectation to become like me and that would be a life well spent.” I sniffed, tears renewed. “You shouldn’t have to hurt the only family you have left for my sake or because you think it’s what I or anyone in this family wants. I just want to be with you in any and every way you will have me.” I flung my arms around his neck, clinging to him as I sobbed into his shoulder. His arms held me securely against his chest, one hand moving slowly through my hair.

“I want to be with you,” I whispered after I’d calmed enough to be understood. “I want to be with you forever, Carlisle.” I pulled back as he made a noise of disagreement. “No, listen to me. I understand what I’d be giving up. Really. You think that your kids haven’t already filled me in on the awful diet and constant temptation? You think they didn’t tell me about how everyone you know and love dies? I know what it means. But when I think about the alternative, about not spending an eternity sharing every joy and sorrow and mundane happening with you? Not spending my nights with your arms holding me and your body pressed against me? Although, I guess in hindsight that wouldn’t be how we’d spend every night since you guys don’t actually need to sleep so we could probably do something else like play chess or go hunting or read or spend time with everyone else-” He pressed a finger to my lips, smiling. “Sorry, I got sidetracked. My point is that I don’t feel like complete without you, Carlisle. I don’t realize that I’m not taking full breaths until you’re here and I can breathe again.” My voice cracked and he pulled my head towards him, pressing our foreheads together and taking a long, deep breath. “I love Charlie but apparently when we love, it’s with our whole being, forever. Hurting him is abhorrent to me.” I leaned back, framing his face with my hands. “But not spending a thousand lifetimes with you is inconceivable.”

He pressed his lips to mine, kissing me tenderly and urgently. I pressed myself against him and poured every ounce of emotion into the kiss. He broke away with a gasp.

“You know you can change your mind,” he said and I shook my head.

“It’s not a decision, Carlisle. It’s a need: as fundamental as breathing.” He peppered my face with kisses and I giggled. “You’re stuck with me. Forever.” His smile was blinding. He almost glowed with joy.

“When,” he asked.

“Not for a few years, I think. I’d like to be a little closer to you in age.” He laughed.

“Like that’s possible,” he scoffed.

“Can we come back and be happy now, too,” Edward called from the dining room. Carlisle and I burst into laughter.

“Yes,” I called and in mere seconds we were surrounded by the whole family, smiling, laughing and hugging us. I looked over at Carlisle as Alice and Rose began to verbally formulate a list of things we would need to do before I changed. His gaze met mine, almost as if he’d felt I was looking. He smiled softly at me, eyes bright with emotion. I smiled back at him, committing this moment to memory.

The day I gave Carlisle happiness he hadn’t even dared to hope for.

Chapter 35: Love Story

Chapter Text

Well friends the time has come. I've been writing ahead so that we can avoid long cliffie breaks. So everyone grab your emotional support alligators or Emmetts and let's continue, shall we.

The song for this chapter is Love Story by Sarah Cothran. Remember that you can play along with the story on Amazon Music using the special web address below!

HEY READERS! Want to be able to play all the songs from this story in order while you read? Well now you can! Just visit: https colon slash slash .com slash user-playlists slash 83eaf70f5fd2488da12e8f0787411603sune?ref=dm_sh_670a-24ac-70cc-3d48-5036e (Remember to replace the words with the punctuation and no spaces!)

Twitter: teamdemonmonkey

Facebook: teamdemonmonkey fanfiction

Disclaimer: I'm only doing this for a friend. I don't get anything from it but her undying appreciation. I certainly don't get to have fun with Emmett and the boys in my head.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE: Love Story
BPOV

“I realize that you all just want to keep me safe but it’s just to see my dad. Surely I won’t be kidnapped and gruesomely tortured from the police station,” I grumbled at Rosalie.

“Look, do I think you’re a badass and that any man who tries to take you out is an idiot? Sure. But they aren’t my rules. You know Carlisle is worried about this guy your dad is trying to catch. So if it makes him feel better to have someone with you whenever you aren’t here then that’s what we’ll do. Your dad will still be there after someone gets back.” I scowled at her. “Don’t pull that face with me, Izzy B. I’m doing this for Carlisle. We’re all doing this to keep you safe.”

“I know. It’s just hard not to feel like a little kid. You guys are already decades older than me anyway plus I can’t go anywhere by myself? It’s grating.” I was fully aware that I had my arms folded tightly against my chest and my shoulders hunched.

“I get that,” she said soothingly, “but I promise it’s not forever. This is just one of those weird days when we all seem to have something going on. Edward and Esme are in Seattle with one of her clients. Alice and Jasper went to meet Peter and Charlotte near Portland. Carlisle is working a double shift and Emmett and I were planning on just hanging around today but my own client called and said that he can’t pick up the car I restored for him and asked if we could deliver it instead. He’s in Bend and we have to drive the car to him and he’s on a time crunch since some of the parts were backordered. So if you could please just wait for whoever gets home first before going to see Charlie, I would appreciate it. I know it’s inconvenient and irritating but it’s what works best for the plan.”

“Fine, I’ll stay. Do you know when my relief team is supposed to arrive,” I asked sarcastically. She smiled and tapped the end of my nose.

“Carlisle will probably get home first unless there’s an emergency. Edward and Esme should only be a few more hours. He texted to say they were getting ready to head back but they’re driving so it takes longer.”

“Okay. Be safe on your trip,” I grumbled petulantly. Rose laughed and hugged me.

“I know this has been a lot. We just want you to be safe,” she sighed. I hugged her back.

“I know you do. And I know Carlisle isn’t the only one who worries.” She gave me a small smile.

“It’s just a testament to how much we all love you, Bella.”

“I love you, too,” I said softly. “Now, go shock and amaze your client. Get that cheddar.” Her face scrunched.

“Let’s add that to the list of things I hope you never say again,” she teased before heading out the door, climbing into the truck Emmett was waiting in, a restored vintage car strapped safely to a trailer on the back. They waved at me before driving off and I headed back into the house.

It felt empty and silent.

“Come on, Swan: you can last a few hours by yourself,” I muttered and even that felt too loud in the quiet. I grabbed the book I’d abandoned by the couch and dropped into the cushions, settling in.

But I couldn’t focus. It felt like a current was running under my skin, making it impossible to concentrate or sit still. I sighed deeply and closed my eyes, trying to remember some of the meditation techniques that my mom had taught me when she was going through her meditation-yoga phase when I was in middle school.

The silence stretched on.

I growled in frustration.

I could just hop in a car and go see Charlie. I didn’t need a babysitter. We would be at the police station! No one was going to do anything to me in a police station. And I needed to talk to Charlie. It had been a couple weeks since we last spoke and now that I knew I was going to inevitably lose him, I felt like I needed to soak up all the time with him that I could. I hadn’t slept well the last few days, an alien sense of foreboding filling my dreams with panic and anxiety until I eventually woke up in a cold sweat. I’d had a headache for days now. I wasn’t sure why I was feeling this way but I was tired, stressed out and visiting Charlie would hopefully calm me.

I grabbed my jacket and slipped my shoes on, pulling the keys off the hook before stepping outside and locking the door behind me. I climbed into my truck and started the engine, cringing at the loud growl that seemed to echo louder than usual across the secluded property. I ignored the twinge of guilt and unease as I made my way down the long gravel drive to the highway. I know that everyone just wanted to protect me but sitting alone in the house, waiting for a chaperone slash chauffeur slash babysitter, seemed like a waste of everyone’s time.

I pulled up to the station and parked. As I was getting out, my dad pulled into the parking lot in his cruiser. He pulled into a spot and climbed out, not noticing me.

“Dad,” I called and he turned, immediately anxious.

“Bella? Did something happen? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” I said tiredly. “I just wanted to see you. You’ve been too busy to send more than the occasional text and I wanted to make sure you were okay.” He pulled me into a hug.

“I’m fine. I’m sorry I haven’t been in touch more. This case has been heating up and my time isn’t really my own lately. But Bella, we talked about this. You shouldn’t be coming to see me. At least not without notice or planning.” I frowned at him, annoyance flaring.

“I get that you’re worried for my safety but I’m not going to schedule time with you. I wanted to see you and so I came to see you. Of all places, the station should be one of the safest options.” He sighed heavily.

“I get that, Bells. I just want you to be careful. Who came with you today?” He looked past me toward my truck.

“No one. Everyone had something else going on and I didn’t want to just sit at home when I could be here, seeing you.” His face darkened.

“You’re not supposed to be alone, Bella! Do you know how much easier it would be for something to happen to you without someone with you? What if you got a flat tire on the side of the road? Someone could grab you and there wouldn’t be any witnesses! This psychopath could take you and I wouldn’t know until he sent me pieces of you!” I scowled at him, feeling angry and frustrated and fed up with this whole situation.

“I know that you’re chasing some bad guy, but I cannot just put my life on hold indefinitely in the hopes that nothing happens to me! It’s been months, Dad. Months that I’ve been avoiding school and only going somewhere if I have someone to go with me. Months of not seeing you, of worrying about you, terrified that this is going to end with you getting horribly injured, or worse killed.”

“I’m just trying to keep you safe,” Charlie growled. In a distant part of my brain, I recognized that I was being irrational. I knew that Charlie just cared about my safety. But whatever part of my brain had been hit with the angry stick was in full control and running the show.

“Yes, I know. Keep Bella away from the house. Make sure Bella is never alone. Don’t let Bella go to school because it’s an easy target. For how long, Dad? How long am I supposed to keep doing this? When does it finally end? When school is over? When I graduate? When you’re in a coffin being lowered into the ground? And then I’ll finally move on and just hope that Carlisle can help pick up the pieces of my broken heart and I’ll get a happily ever after?” His face went blank.

“Why would Carlisle be the one fixing your heart, Bella?”

“What,” I asked, trying to sort through what I’d said.

“You said Carlisle would pick up the pieces and you’d get a happily ever after. What does Carlisle have to do with that?” His voice was robotically neutral and quiet. My gut clenched in panic.

“I-I meant Edward.” His eyes tightened.

“No, I think you said exactly what you meant to say. What’s going on, Bella?” I gripped the sides of my head, trying to ignore the pounding drum solo going on inside. “Did Carlisle do something? Did he pressure you?” His voice was clipped.

“No! He would never.” His eyes widened before his mouth turned down in an angry grimace.

“Are you sleeping with him,” he demanded, grabbing my arm.

“No!”

“He thinks that his son’s girlfriend moves in and that gives him the opportunity to play savior and make you feel indebted to him.”

“No, that’s not what’s happening,” I cried.

“Really, Bella? Because it sounds to me like I sent my daughter to live with someone I thought I could trust and how he’s making advances on her even though he’s way too old for a minor!”

“You’ve got it wrong!”

“Do I? He’s lying to you, Bella! Whatever it is that he’s told you, whatever compliments he’s paid, he’s after one thing!”

“He loves me!” My voice rang out in the sudden silence. Charlie stopped, staring at me in horror. “And I love him.”

“What,” he gasped.

“I love him. He’s not trying to take advantage of his son’s girlfriend. Edward and I were never together. He’s respected my wishes every step of the way and I… I love him.”

“No,” he growled. “You think you do, Bella, but what you’re feeling is not love. It’s not.”

“It is,” I said firmly, wiping at the tears on my cheeks. “I feel like my whole self around him, Dad. That way you felt about Mom? That’s how I feel about Carlisle. Like I’m only breathing when he’s around.” His face went slack.

“You can’t, Bella. You can’t be with him. He’s older. He has kids. Kids that are the same. Age. As. You. I don’t know what games he’s been playing, but this isn’t anything like Renee and I.”

“I know you don’t want to hear it,” I said slowly. “I know you’re feeling betrayed. It’s why I decided not to tell you; why I pretended it was Edward, not Carlisle.”

“So you were fine lying to me? And Edward was obviously in on it too. Did Carlisle ask him to do that? You’re playing right into his hands, Bells!”

“There’s no game, Dad! Carlisle is the one who didn’t want to start anything. He’s the one who said I could do better. But I don’t want better! Not if it’s not him.”

“Bella,” he said, breathing heavily. “You can’t see him anymore. I’ll arrange for you to go to a safehouse. I’ll have some uniforms take you right now.”

“I don’t want to go to a safehouse. There is nowhere safer for me than with the Cullens!”

“It’s illegal,” he fumed. “What he is doing with you is illegal. And as soon as I finish making sure you’re safe, I will be heading straight for the hospital and arresting him!” I grabbed his arm as he began pulling me across the parking lot to the station.

“You can’t do that, Dad! You-”

“Hey, Chief Swan!” We both turned toward the road. A nondescript tan car was pulled up in front of the entrance to the parking lot, blocking it from the road. A man was standing on the driver’s side by the hood, gun pointed at us. He was average and completely forgettable but I got the feeling that Charlie knew exactly who he was. “I’ve really enjoyed our game of cat and mouse. You even managed to stop me from getting to your daughter like I planned. But I always get what I want in the end. And now it’s time for me to move on to the next town.”

I was frozen, praying that someone was watching, someone could stop him, anything. But my prayers died when the sound of gunshots tore through the air.

Edward’s POV

“Thank you for coming with me,” Esme said from the seat beside me. I squeezed her hand and pressed it to my lips.

“To the ends of the earth, my love,” I murmured.

“I was thinking of making Bella Italian for dinner when we get home,” she murmured conversationally and I smiled as recipes drifted through her mind.

“You do more cooking for Bella than you do for me,” I teased. She laughed and my heart lifted. Even after decades together, I would never get over the pure satisfaction I felt when I heard that sound, knowing I was the cause.

“Do you want me to cook for you, dear? I’ll expect you to eat every bite. It’s only good manners after all,” she said archly. I laughed and buried my face in her neck, licking along the smooth skin and relishing the taste of her. Her sharp intake of breath made me smile in triumph.

“Husband of mine, I realize it’s not absolutely necessary but I think it would be better if you actually kept your eyes on the road while behind the wheel,” she breathed. I chuckled against her skin before leaning back and sighing.

“Always ruining my fun with your common sense,” I lamented. She laughed, her mind immediately filling with beautifully naughty images of us together. “If you want me to keep driving, I strongly suggest you turn your thoughts elsewhere, my darling wife. I am a mere teenage boy after all. And it has been far too long since I have had my dirty way with you against a tree.” She giggled.

“That’s because you can’t control yourself enough to leave the tree in one piece.” I gave her a feral grin.

“I’m sure you meant that as an insult and yet I feel extremely complimented.”

“Only you, husband, would take the destruction of your environment as a compliment.” I laughed deeply.

“You’re really the one to blame, wife. I wouldn’t be nearly so destructive if you didn’t make me feral with need.” She pressed a hand to her heart in mock outrage.

“I see we’re victim blaming now.”

“I’m the victim. Every time I see your face, I’m rendered completely helpless by you. It’s amazing I’m able to function at all instead of worshipping you night and day like the goddess you are.” She pulled my face to hers for a passionate kiss. I kissed her back, meeting her passion with my own. I pulled off the road at the next turn and parked under a giant pine tree.

I need you, she whispered in her head and I groaned as she began to think through all the things she wanted me to do to her.

“Esme,” I breathed as she climbed over the console and onto my lap, pressing herself against me.

My phone buzzed.

I ignored it, pressing myself against her as her fingers wound into my hair.

My phone buzzed again, not stopping.

Maybe you should get that, she thought ruefully.

“My hands are full,” I explained as I grabbed the sculpted globes of her bottom, squeezing.

My phone started buzzing again.

What if it’s an emergency, she thought, already pulling back from me. I cursed and grabbed the phone, answering the call.

“Alice, this had better be imp-”

“Bella’s in danger,” Alice cried and I immediately sat up straighter.

“Explain,” I said, putting the car into drive and swinging it around. Esme climbed back into her seat.

“I don’t know for sure who it is but she went to see Charlie and there’s a man, holding a gun. He shoots her, Edward! I’m too far to get to her but you might be able to if you start running now. She’s at the police station. You have to hurry!”

“I will,” I promised before hanging up and pressing the briefest kiss to Esme’s mouth.

“Go,” she said urgently and I flung the car door open, already running.

The world passed by me in a blur of greens and browns. I pushed myself harder, my mind reeling with what Alice had told me, but it felt like I was moving through tar. I growled my rage and ran through the forests of the Olympic Peninsula, trying to reach my best friend before something terrible happened to her.

Why was she with Charlie? Why wasn’t anyone with her?

What if I didn’t make it in time?

Forks started to appear around me and I ran through the back of the town toward the police station.

The daughter is here too! What a gift! I growled as the thoughts penetrated the haze of worry in my head. It was that lowlife who had threatened Bella.

“-I always get what I want in the end. And now it’s time for me to move on to the next town,” I heard an unfamiliar voice say as I got closer to the station. I could see Bella and Charlie through the trees, standing in the parking lot as a stranger pointed a gun at them.

“No,” I roared but I was too far away.

Gunshots rang through the trees and I watched in horror as Bella and Charlie dropped to the ground. The man climbed back into his car and tore away from the police station, too far ahead for me to do anything to him. I raced to Bella and Charlie. Her pale face was growing whiter while her shirt started to blossom red. I sniffed and fire ripped down my throat, the almost overpowering smell of her blood triggering every instinct I possessed.

I wanted to taste her.

Needed to taste her.

Nothing would ever be better than the succulent, ripe feast spilling onto the pavement before me.

Carlisle.

I couldn't hurt Carlisle.

I couldn’t be the reason that Bella didn’t make it out of this alive.

Nothing was worth the absolute devastation losing Bella would cause.

I stopped breathing, focusing my mind on Carlisle’s face if I hurt her. I pulled my shirt off, pressing into the wounds on Bella’s abdomen. Her blood flooded over my hands, staining them red but I jerked my eyes to her face. Her eyelids fluttered weekly.

“Charlie,” she breathed. Her eyes met mine and I could see the panic in them. “Is he…?” I looked over at Charlie. His chest was moving, barely.

“He’s still breathing,” I assured her. Officers streamed out of the station, alerted by the gunshots. They started shouting and someone dropped down next to Charlie, hands hovering nervously over him. “Pack the wounds and apply pressure,” I barked out. People surrounded us and I heard someone calling 911. “We have to try and stop the bleeding. How many shots did the Chief take,” I asked. Thoughts were flying as fast as words between people and I struggled not to let it overwhelm me, to focus on stabilizing Bella.

“It looks like five,” a deputy answered. I counted Bella’s entry wounds.

“She took three. Through and through?” I turned her gently, checking for exit wounds.

“Only three exit wounds on Chief,” he answered. I cursed.

“Come on, Bella. This isn’t how this ends,” I said to her urgently. Her eyelids were fluttering, her heart rate stuttering.

“Car… lisle,” she rasped.

“We’re going to get you to him, Bella. He’ll fix this. He’ll fix you,” I promised desperately. I could hear the sirens approaching, too far for the humans to pick up on but the sound gave me a renewed sense of hope.

“I don’t know if I can feel a pulse,” the deputy with Charlie said. I could still hear his heartbeat but it was sluggish.

“Dammit,” I huffed. “You,” I said looking up at another officer who was watching the scene with cool, controlled thoughts. “Come put pressure here. Don’t let up.” He nodded robotically and moved to Bella’s other side, pressing his hands where mine had been. I turned over to Charlie, feeling for his pulse. “Come on, Charlie. She’ll kill me if she loses you,” I muttered under my breath. The ambulance pulled up and I sighed in relief before I realized that it was just one ambulance. EMTs rushed toward us with a gurney.

“What do we have,” Earl asked me and I was grateful for the familiarity that came with being the son of the town doctor.

“Five gunshot wounds to the chest and abdomen. Three through and through. Heart rate is sluggish,” I pushed out. “Bella has three entry wounds, no exits. She’s been minimally conscious. Heart rate is steady but slowing.”

“We have to take Charlie first,” Earl said. “He’s in worse shape.” I looked over at Bella desperately. They were both in bad shape. I wasn’t even sure that Bella would make it to the hospital before they lost her heartbeat.

But Charlie was as close to death as one could get without stepping into the light.

“Take him,” I said and Earl moved in to take my place. I helped Peggy and the other EMT get Charlie onto the gurney and into the ambulance. I spun back to Bella and dropped down. “Bella,” I said urgently. She moaned faintly. “Bella, stay with me. I can’t lose you. We can’t lose you.”

But as she lay in the parking lot of the police station, blood soaked and injured, I worried that losing her was an inevitability.